Ruining You (26 page)

Kane – I’ll be waiting
.

Shaking my head at their
replies, I settle in for the long flight home. Turning my music on and closing
my eyes, I let sleep take me away. For once, I don’t fear dreams. I want to
escape what I’m feeling right now.

The wind blows through the
trees as I sit propped up against JT’s grave. Angry grey clouds litter the sky,
and my hair whips around my face. Reaching up to gather it, I tuck it back
around my ears. From the corner of my eye, I see someone standing across the
lake. My devil stands there with crossed arms, and I can hear him laughing.

Leaning my head back against
the grave, I wait for him to come to me. I’m tired of running. He’ll only catch
me. Within a blink of my eyes, he stands before me. He is darkly handsome, sin
incarnate, and looking more like Coach Branch than I remember. I wonder if he
will always be with me. When I am old, I wonder if my Satan will invade my
silver laced head.

He answers my unspoken
questions, “Yes, you will. I’m in you for infinity.”

“What are your plans for me
this time? What torment can you conjure up now?”

He grins, dropping down
beside me. “I’m sure, I can think of something.” I close my eyes as he slithers
to me. I’m too tired to fight this time. My eyes flash open after several
moments of silence and uneventful nothingness. He’s gone. Looking around I
don’t see him, so I lean my head back against the tomb and shut my eyes,
willing my thoughts not to think of pain or death.

The sound of the pilot announcing
to secure my seatbelt wakes me. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I look down at
my watch to see that it’s nearly 4 A.M. Grabbing my purse, I take out my brush
and makeup to touch everything up. Once the plane lands, I run to the bathroom
before getting off to brush my teeth and look at the reflection in the mirror.
It’s time to grow up. It’s time to quit creating wars within myself and with
those who love me the most. 

Walking down the steps, I
notice the early morning is still as dark as night. I see Kane’s Crossfire
parked, and he and my Dad lean against it talking. Kane’s arms and legs are
crossed as he looks at my dad, nodding his head at something he is saying.
Lugging my bag, I walk towards them. When I’m a little closer, I hear the last
thing that Kane says to him. He doesn’t know I’m listening. “She drives me
crazy, but I’ll take care of her. Always.”

I stop before them, dropping
my bags on the ground from fatigue. My dad pushes away from the car first and
strolls over to me. Suddenly, I feel a little awkward. It’s one thing to tell
my mom that I’m staying with Kane, but I will not tell my dad. If he tells me
lets go, I’m gone. No questions asked.

“I hear the plane was short
four passengers on the return flight and that it’s in the same condition as
when it left; however, that’s not why I’m here at…,” he looks down at his watch
then continues, “four in the morning. I needed to make sure you got home in one
piece.” He reaches me and kisses my forehead. Looking back at Kane, he turns
again towards me. Shaking his head, he says, “You’re an adult now, Jay. You’re
mother and I rushed you into the responsibilities of one too soon, and you paid
the price. That is something I have to live with for the rest of my life.” With
that, he walks away.

“Dad,” I call to him as he
turns back to me. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Smiling,
he gets in the car to head home.

Crisis averted. Thank God. I
glance towards Kane, still planted against his car.

His hoarse voice speaks up,
“Are you coming home with me, Jay?”

Nodding my head up and down,
I answer, “Yes.”

“Why?”

Maybe it’s just too damn
early in the morning, but I don’t understand the question, “Why what?”

“Why are you coming home
with me?”

The answer is so clear to me
that I try to deliver it in a way that is equally clear for him. “While I was
in L.A., all I wanted was you.” Clearing my throat and looking into his eyes, I
say it again, “All I want is you.”

His eyes spark, and the
depth of need is evident. It lights a fire within me that is fanned throughout with
every breath I take. Finally, he pushes away from the car and walks directly to
me before stopping mere inches from my face. His body heat rushes over me. The
fire raging within me burns every thought, every worry, and everything but him.
He’s the only thing left standing for me.

He brings his hand up and
caresses my neck. Gently, he grips the back of my head and draws me closer. His
lips touch mine. They are rough and bitter at first, almost punishing in
nature. His eyes never close, and neither do mine. When his tongue swipes my
mouth, I open it and allow him to enter, granting him the permission that he
never needed. My hands travel up his chest, and I can feel the solid muscles
underneath. I lock my fingers together behind his back and pull him into me.

He tries to step back, but
this time, I’m the one going after him. I plead with whimpers for him not to
stop. “Jay,” he whispers against my mouth, “everybody in the world, including
your dad, can see us. I know he’s not a dumbass, so I don’t want to rub what’s
about to happen to you in his face.”

Sanity slowly returns, but
the fire is stoked and burning. Common sense lags behind. “What’s about to
happen?” I know the answer, but I’m playing with our fire. I want to hear it
from his lips.

His eyes widen, but he
smiles, figuring out my game. “I’m taking you to my house, and I’m putting you
to bed.” His grin gets a little wider before he finishes, “With me in you.”

Letting go of me, he steps
back and grabs my bags. I stay where I am to let his words settle and blaze
within me. My body’s reaction is to become wetter, not to put out the fire, but
to allow slippery access to it.

“Are you coming, Jay?”

I jump at the sound of his
words, making my feet move in the direction of his car. Standing at the open
passenger door, he waits for me. How long was I daydreaming? Before I can lean
down to enter the car, he lifts my chin with his fingers.

“All I have ever wanted was
you. I’ve waited long enough.” He kisses my lips before helping me in.

We don’t say anything on the
way over, both probably scared to say the wrong thing. We’ve both made that
mistake, and Kane is right, it’s our time. We have waited long enough. He pulls
into the driveway of a nice two-story brick home. Opening the garage, he drives
in to park.

Leaning over me, he opens
the door, and we sit in silence with eyes locked. His touch singes my skin as I
burn from want and whimper in desire. He inhales sharply at the sound of my
yearning sob, and instantly, we both jump out of the car. I rush to the driver’s
side and take his outstretched hand. He kisses me full on the lips again, and
we make our way into the house. We reach a door that has a stairway leading
down. I follow him until it opens up into an apartment. I pay no attention to
anything else around me; he has me in his spell. We make it to the couch and he
pulls me down next to him.

His lips reconnect with
mine, and we consume one another. I raise my fingertips between our mouths and
press against them. A look of confusion emerges on his face but quickly fades
as I begin to trace his lips. Closing his eyes, he leans back against the
cushions and tries to take me with him. I resist and stop to gaze at his
beautiful face for just a second. I’m astonished. He’s mine.

“I love the way your soft
lips and hard body feel beneath my fingertips.”

His eyes flutter open at the
sound of my voice. I slide my hand from his face to his neck and run my finger
along his jaw line before tracing the black ink on his neck, “To thine own self
be true.”

“I love that you understand
the pain in me.”

Letting my fingers trail to
the hem of his t-shirt, I gently slip my hands underneath. My touch lightly
glides back up and across his rigid abs. A hiss escapes from his lips. I
retract my hands from his shirt, grip it firmly, and pull it up and over his
head. I toss it to the floor before placing my palms on his chest, one on his
left pec and the other over his heart.

“I love that you know the
real me, and you’re still here.”

Sensing that I need to
control the moment, he sits motionless beneath me. His gaze shifts to different
spots on my face, but it never leaves. Pressing my hands against his chest, I
push him further into the couch, and my body slithers down to the floor in
front of him. With my hands resting on his knees, I nudge his legs apart and
place myself between them.

Peering into his eyes, I
continue. “I love how you protect both your heart and mine.”

I watch my hands travel from
his knees, over the rough denim, to the button of his jeans. Knowing this
moment will define my life forever, they tremble as they wiggle the button
free. Slowly, I bring my eyes to meet his. His stare pierces my soul, and the
only thing I can say to him comes in the form of three words shrouded in a
breathy whisper. 

“I love you, Kane.”

I hear his quick intake of
breath a second before his control snaps. Reaching down, he grasps the sides of
my face and pulls me to him. His kiss takes possession of me: mind¸ body, and
soul. Claiming my heart with actions, not words, he slides our bodies down to
the floor. We land on our knees, body to body, with his mouth never leaving
mine.

Almost tickling, his hands
feather down my sides, making me quiver. Grasping the ends of my dress, he
pulls back, quickly stripping me of it. His hands caress my neck, and
everywhere he touches sends electric currents through me. He looks down at the
lingerie I bought for him, a little pair of black and pink tie panties and a
matching demi-bra. His groan of approval is all I need.

I moan loudly in response,
not holding anything back from him. Meeting my lips again, his mouth ravages
mine. He leans me back against the carpeted floor and rests his body beside
mine. He fumbles to finish undoing his jeans while pushing at his underwear.
Both slide off simultaneously.

He presses me to the floor
with his mouth and body, and I hold on tight, gripping his thick tattooed
biceps. His stiff arousal is evident as it presses firmly against my damp
mound, grinding against me in sweet torture. While kissing me, he nips at my
lips then sucks to soothe them. He likes doing this, and damn, I like him doing
it. It kindles every spark within me and turns them to roaring flames. His
movements send hot lust surging through my body, over and over, shorting my
brainwaves and making it impossible to do anything but feel.

He whispers promises in my
ear, but I’m beyond understanding or caring at this point. Reaching my hand
down, I find what I am l searching for. Gripping his hard fervor, I slide my
hand from base to tip.

“God, Jay,” he moans.

His moans excite me. The
sweet sound increases the need in me. I continue my manual exploration of him –
faster and tighter then slow and smooth.

“Stop,” he cries as he grabs
my hand, pulling it away. “That is not how it ends this time.”

His unfocussed gaze and
shortness of breath only build my excitement. His hands slide around my back,
and I lift up for easier access to my bra clasps. Once he has removed it, his
fingers skim to the sides of my thighs and pull the ties of my panties so that
they release. He immediately rips them away. Leaning up, he looks down the
length of my body. My nipples are erect, and my bare mound glistens.

I see him visibly swallow
and lick his lips, teasing me to the point of pain. My body can’t take anymore.
I’m panting, literally shuddering with want. His eyes fly to mine as he feels
me shaking underneath.

“Jay, are you okay? We can
stop if you need to.”

“No!” I shout. “Please no.
Now, I can’t wait any longer. I...please, Kane, love me.”

“Shh...I’ll take care of it.
Let me take care of you.”

His hands slide down my body
and open my thighs. One hand slides to my middle and spreads my warmth. His
fingers prepare me for him. My cries of pleasure fill the silence, building as
everything inside me tries to reach for completion. It’s just out of reach. I
can feel him rising above me as he prods me open and slides his thickness in. 

“Shit,” he says stopping and
pulling out. Reaching down, he hastily grabs for his jeans as he scrambles for
something.

With my body about to
combust, he pulls away? Oh, hell to the no! All the pleasure turns to agonizing
pain with the loss of his touch. Springing up, I tackle him to the ground.
Finding his lips, I regain the taste of Heaven. I rub my heat against him,
trying to mount him this way. Forcefully, he grasps my hips and holds me still,
preventing me from fitting myself onto him.

“Wait, Jay. God, baby, wait
just a second.”

His words filter through my
thoughts, slowing me down just enough, that I understand what is happening.
Placing me astride his leg, he brings a packet to his mouth and rips it with
his teeth. I can’t help but rock back and forth, stimulating myself and closing
my eyes in pleasure. I open them only to watch him sheath himself with the
condom. He grabs my hips once again to lift me over him.