The Read And Weep Bundle: Anonymous, Perfectly Hopeless, Run (8 page)

Hart pulled up to the white house with the white picket fence. He stared at the red and white balloons fluttering from one of those decked out birthday signs planted in the front yard.

He opened up the back door of his car and pulled out the gift he had picked out. He hadn’t a clue what to get so he hoped it went over well. As he approached the driveway he spotted the bounce house in the backyard it was full of kids and looked like it was ready to burst any minute.

Just when he was about to turn around and go home his friend spotted him. Jesse patted the guy he was talking to on the shoulder and excused himself.

“Holy shit. I never thought you would show yourself,” Jesse said. He placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder and looked him over. It had been some time since they met up.

Hart shrugged. “It wasn’t like I had anything else to do.” He handed over the horribly wrapped gift. “I’m not sure what three year old girls like but I did my best. I picked out the most obnoxious doll with the ugliest dress I could find. And they aren’t cheap.”

Jesse smirked staring at the gift in his hand. “Look at you. Hart Allen gives a shit about something, nice to see you not in trouble for once.”

Hart raised an eyebrow. It wasn’t long ago that Jesse and him were both crashing on couches heading for another stint in rehab or the morgue. Jesse just decided to clean up his act and stay that way. Something clicked with him finally and that’s all anyone could hope for.

Jesse found a job and met a girl. They had a baby and he decided that there were more important things in his life than getting high or drunk. It happened.

He followed Jesse through the congested back yard of running kids and chattering adults. Jesse scooped up one of the little girls playing in the sand box and brought her over.

“Isabella, say hello to Hart.” Isabella gave Hart a shy smile before squirming out of her dad’s clutches.

Hart watched her hop and twirl away in her frilly tutu and plunge herself back into the sand, her golden hair fluttering around her head. She was a cute kid he had to admit but he could never imagine Jesse as a dad. “She looks like her mother thank god.”

Jesse scratched the back of his neck. “No shit. So how have things been?”

Before Hart could offer up an answer Jesse’s fiancé found them and came over. She was a tall brunette he met at a diner. She came from a wealthy family and for some reason they all just fell right in love with Jesse even with his past.

“Nice to see you, Hart,” Angie said. She clutched her red solo cup watching the mayhem as she talked to him. “Jesse and I thought you left town.”

Hart shook his head. “The usual. But I’m back so I figured I’d show my face for once.”

Angie nodded and quickly changed the subject. “Are you seeing anyone?”

Hart raised an eyebrow shooting an uneasy look in Jesse direction. He hated being set up.

“Hon, we haven’t even asked him how he’s doing,” Jesse said. “How you doing, asshole?”

“I’m good I assure you.” Hart sighed looking at Angie. “And no I am not seeing anyone.”

She looped an arm through his and guided his attention to the other end of the yard.

“Do you see the blonde with the red dress on?”

He nodded. Of course he saw her she was cackling and blinding him with all the bracelets and earrings hanging from her body. Not his type. “Her name is Gia and we’ve been friends since college.”

“Nice.”

“Maybe you say hello when we cut the cake?” Angie said giving him a nudge. “What would it hurt?”

Hart forced a smile. “I’m sure nothing.” That was enough to make her leave him alone.

“She tries dude. She is always asking me how you’re doing. I think she’s afraid you’re going to wind up behind bars or something again,” Jesse told him taking a swig of his punch. “So what changed? What brought you all the way across town to a kid’s birthday party?”

“Just trying to stay out of trouble and to see an old friend,” he said. And it was the truth. Usually after a few months he would be on his way back to rehab, but for some reason this time he hated the idea of going back again.

Jesse and Hart were friends since he was just a kid. He knew all about Hart and what made him tick. He knew about his past, his childhood and all the reasons he failed when it came to staying clean. And at that moment he needed someone who knew him. He didn’t have anybody else.

He watched Angie set up the presents for little Isabella to open. Hart wished he had something normal like a family or a good job or just someone he could trust.

“Well you look good keep it up,” Jesse said. “I have to help with the presents before Angie is pissed. Why not mingle with the blonde?” Jesse shrugged, smirking. He knew as well as Hart the obnoxious blonde wasn’t Hart’s type. He hated loud girls.

Hart sat back and watched the festivities. He considered talking to the blonde. What would it hurt? Maybe for a few hours he could have a good time and take his mind off how much of a waste he felt at the moment. He took a deep breath and started moving toward her. She let out another cackle slapping her friend on the arm. He already regretted his decision and he hadn’t even made it over. And just before he did his phone rang and stopped him in his tracks.

“Hello?” He was a bit shocked that she was calling him.

“I almost went to the bar but I decided to call you instead.” She laughed and he was at a loss for words.

“Look at you following the rules,” he said. “What would make you want to do that?”

***

Elle dropped her head back onto her bedroom pillows staring up at the ceiling phone in hand. Talking to Hart on the phone in her childhood bedroom reminded her of when she was a kid talking to her first crush.

“Because I can’t deal with change.” She told him. “And things are changing.” She was referring to Pauly. Their relationship was now officially over and she didn’t know how to feel about it. But the fact alcohol was the first thought in her mind scared her so she called Hart.

There was a lot of laughter in the background. She was beginning to feel stupid for calling him. He sounded busy.

“Did I call at a bad time?”

“You called at a perfect time. I was about to do something stupid myself.” He looked at the blonde in front of him glad he dodged that bullet. “So what happened?”

Elle sighed into the phone. “I broke up with my boyfriend. I spent my entire life it feels like dating him and I just ended it. I couldn’t take it anymore. He did nothing but make me feel worse every day. So I ended it.”

“About fucking time,” Hart blurted. He hated that asshat. “You can do better.”

There was a pause. “Thanks, Hart. And thanks for talking to me.”

“No problem,” he said.

She bit at her lip not sure what to say next. “Well thanks for listening I think I feel better. Maybe I’ll hit up an AA meeting or something later.”

He turned around, finding a quiet patch of land in the backyard. “How about we meet up? AA meetings are for quitters.”

She smiled into the phone. “And do what?”

“Complain about life. Eat another sundae. Whatever you want, I don’t fucking care.” He just wanted someone to talk to before he went off the deep end and did the one thing he didn’t want to do.

“Maybe see a movie or you can teach me to sound as cool as you when I say fuck,” she teased.

Hart smirked. “I highly doubt you’ll ever be this cool but I’ll give it my best shot if you want.”

“Okay, so what time should I be ready?”

He looked down at his watch. “Give me an hour.”

“Sounds good. See you in a little bit.”

Elle loaded the last dish in the dishwasher closing it up and locking it. She dried her hands on the hand towel and caught a glimpse of herself in the toaster. Hart was coming soon to pick her up and she was in a hurry to help her parent’s out so she could take off without a bunch of questions.

She took the seat at the island in their kitchen and started rifling through a fashion magazine. Her mother was busy with one of her floral arrangements and her dad was at the dining room table going over bills of some sort.

“Do you have plans?” her mother asked after the fifth glimpse in her toaster.

Elle nodded. “A friend of mine was coming by to take me out for a bit. It’s nothing big.”

Her dad’s head shot up. “What’s this I hear you and Pauly are on a break?”

She pushed her hair behind her ear. “It’s not a break. We broke up…for good.”

Her mother put down her scissors and looked at her speechless.

“And you’re already running around with someone else?” Her dad never worried about his harshness. He was an honest man to all involved. And sometimes Elle hated that about him.

“I’ve known Hart for a while. He’s a friend.” She shrugged dropping down from the stool. She crossed the room and opened the refrigerator taking out a bottled water. “If it’s any consolation Dad I feel better now that Pauly and I ended things.”

It wasn’t. Her dad’s eyebrows met in the middle like they always did when he didn’t agree. “When I was your age I was working on my first kid and married to your mother. I had a house, I was almost done with college and I was on my way to my next degree.”

Her mom sighed. “She’s got plenty of time to make decisions about her future love life. Let the girl breathe. She was tied down to that boy for much too long. And frankly I don’t like the way he treated her.”

Her dad lifted a bill and looked it over before he said anything. “This Hart, isn’t he the one from rehab?”

Her mother nodded.

“The one with a drug problem who never had a single visitor?” Her dad pointed out. “This is the kind of guy you want to involve yourself with?”

Elle squeezed her water bottle. She hated how awful he made her feel. “This is the kind of thing Pauly always did to me. He made me feel bad for where I’ve been.” She hit the pedal on the trash can opening the lid and chucked the water bottle in the trash.

“I’m not attacking you. I just don’t think I would be a good parent if I was okay with you running around with some drug addict.”

Hart knocked on the door silencing her dad. Her mom opened the door and welcomed him in. She looked him over a small smile on her face, but Elle could see just how nervous she was.

“I’m Nicole, Elle’s mother,” she said introducing herself. She hurried around the island going back to her flowers. She knew how her husband felt about the boy she wasn’t going to waste her time trying to get to know him.

Elle noticed Hart look over at her dad. “Let me just grab my purse.” She headed out of the room leaving Hart alone with her parent’s. She was too upset to think about how awkward he might feel.

Hart cleared his throat searching the room for something to mention. He settled on the golf clubs in the corner. “I hear they are opening up a new golf course next year not too far from here.”

Her dad stopped writing long enough to lay eyes on him. He could tell he wasn’t impressed. He could also tell the man did not want to talk to him about anything. He dropped back in the chair. “Those are my son’s. I hate the sport.”

Hart carved a hand through his hair shifting uncomfortably where he was. He wished Elle would hurry back because he was starting to feel really awkward.

Elle came back in the room with a little black purse in her hand. “I’ll be back later don’t wait up. I’ll be out making bad decisions.”

Hart nodded politely at them before making a break for it. He released a breath once he was on the porch. “Fuck me. Talk about uncomfortable. Your father hates me.”

Elle opened up the door to Hart’s truck. “He doesn’t hate you. He hates what I’ve done with my life.”

Hart watched her buckle up and started the engine.

“A bar?” Elle asked, staring at the brick establishment. She had never seen it before.

“A sober lounge,” Hart explained. “I know the guy who owns the place.”

She bit at her lip. What recovering addict wanted to come anywhere near a bar? She knew she was being stupid, she went in bars all the time. But she was still questioning it. But she got out anyways.

“So how do you know the guy?” she asked Hart.

Hart opened the door of the sober lounge and let her go in first. “We’ve been friends for a long time. He also had some demons. He got over his and opened up this place for people like us.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Like us?”

Hart nodded. “People who still want to enjoy life just without being thrown into another rehab.”

She was plunged into music and laughter. She hoped it wasn’t a mistake.

Hart sensed her apprehension so he put an arm around her and lead her to the counter in the center. Jesse was there waiting.

“Two visits in a week. What have I done to get so unlucky?” Jesse smirked.

“We came for the wings,” Hart told him.

Elle ran a few fingers around her ear pinning her hair back. She never ate wings, and she didn’t think she wanted to try in front of Hart or anyone for that matter.

Jesse eyed Elle, he could tell she was uncomfortable. He wondered what his friend had got himself into. “They are the best in town. How about I make you a virgin margarita to start?”

She eyed the bowl of peanuts on the counter and reluctantly took a seat. “I’m Elle.” If Hart wasn’t going to introduce them she figured she should.

Hart sat down next to her. “I was just about to get to that.”

Jesse grinned. “Jesse. It’s nice to meet you. And how do you know my oldest friend?”

She glanced at Hart. “Rehab.”

Jesse nodded letting it go as quick as it was said. It wasn’t a big deal to him and this lightened her load. She didn’t feel judged for once in her life. She undid her jacket and settled into her seat.

“I’ll take a coke. And the wings.” Hart pulled a bowl of pretzels close and took one. He held out his hand. “Give me your hand.”

Elle made a face. “Why?” She felt a bit weird but she did as he asked. He took hold of her hand and slipped the pretzel down the length of her finger.

“Will you be my sober buddy?” His grin made her grin. She liked the way his eyes came alive when he was being ridiculous. He was a bit bashful yet in control.

“Seeing it’s already on sure why not?” She studied the pretzel ring smiling a bit bigger. “Should we have a prenup?”

Hart popped another pretzel in his mouth shaking his head. “You can have it all, every bit of it.”

“Wow. All of it?” She raised her eyebrow at Hart. “What a gentleman, and a man with nothing to lose.”

Hart held back the urge to agree with her joke. It was true. He was a man with nothing to lose. But he pushed it aside and decided to enjoy the night.

“I say while we are waiting for Jesse to bring us those wings we write on the wall,” he said standing up. “Everyone does it.”

Elle followed Hart to a giant wall in the back. On every inch housed scrawls of dreams and goals, of shoutouts and signatures, it was chaos but beautiful all at the same time.

Hart watched her take it in. He handed over a marker. “This is one idea I can deal with. Jesse is always trying to come up with ways to make people let go.”

Elle fingered the marker and nodded. “It’s interesting.” She uncapped her marker. A world of thoughts swam around in her head and she was ready to let one of them go.

Hart watched her. Her writing was as girly as she was.
To all the moments I forgot to breathe…
She wrote.

“What’s that mean?” He pressed a finger against the wall right next to the first word.

“I’m breathing now,” she told him. “Maybe if I remember that I can get through it.”

He took back her marker, and wrote his.
You’re more than you think you’re worth.

She smiled at him. “You’re forever trying to make me feel better.”

He nodded and took her by the hand. “Dance with me.”

She suddenly realized there was music playing. And now she felt like all eyes were on her but she didn’t care. She was enjoying herself. Their bodies connected and he held on to her doing a subpar job of circling the floor. He wasn’t a dancer by any means, he knew enough.

She didn’t mind he was stepping on her feet or that the song was one she never heard before. It was prefect.

Jesse shook his head. He dropped the basket of wings down on the counter caught off guard by the sight of Hart and this girl. This wasn’t like his friend, Hart didn’t dance. He hated making a fool out of himself. This was something different.