The Celestial Kiss (20 page)

Janna spent the night with me.  We hadn’t planned it that way, but we had a way of sharing the silence when it was necessary and filling it with idle chatter when it wasn’t.  She was officially the only person who knew me on such an introspective level, Xian aside. We talked for hours, confessing our souls to each other, and I forgave her for the incident with Katie.  This was like having a real sister…we didn’t realize how much time had slipped by until we were both sitting in the bed, exhausted, and giggling about things that weren’t even funny.  Janna fell asleep smiling and I let her be, taking the edge of the bed.

              She was gone when I woke up, but it was still breakfast, so I made my way to the dining hall.  The passages were more crowded than I’d ever seen them, so much so that it was almost impossible to squeeze through the warm bodies to get where I was going.  Surprisingly, they did not all seem to be headed in for a meal…they milled about every which way, like they’d been called here but weren’t certain why. 

              “Lilith.”  James picked me easily out of the crowd and headed over towards me.  It was the first time I’d seen him since his father’s passing.  I’d expected him to look like Janna had…red eyes, puffy skin, something.  But he looked only like himself…tall, dark, and handsome.  And maybe a little more unshaven than usual.

              “James.  How are you…”  I’d meant to ask how he was feeling, but it was a stupid question so I swallowed what was left of it and managed a smile.  “Can we talk?”

              James looked around, smiling at a few passersby.  “Now?  It’s not really the best time.”

              “No.”  I felt silly, but I couldn’t help it.  “But maybe soon?  I need answers.”             

James sighed, looking over at me.  That look caught me off guard.  It wasn’t the same I’d come to expect from him.  This look was exhausted, worn paper thin and hollow from the toll of the last few days.  I would have swallowed my own request even if he hadn’t implored me to.  “You deserve answers, Lilith.”  He said.  “And I will gladly give them to you, but please, not today.  Not on the day of my father’s funeral.”

I was beginning to regret not taking my chance to run.  It wouldn’t have been half as bad as anything I’d endured if James hadn’t informed me that I was to be at his side throughout his father’s funeral—as a show of solidarity.  He didn’t offer any details, and I didn’t ask until Janna came knocking after breakfast.

One look at the dress in her hand, and I was ready to back out, literally stepping away from her as though it carried the plague.  “I don’t understand why I have to be at his side all night.”  I grumbled when she thrust the garment at me.  “I mean, no offense, but I’m not part of this...”

Janna was immaculate in a black dress that tastefully accentuated her athletic build and her hair swept into a jeweled barrette.  I, on the other hand, looked like I’d been stuffed into a child’s dress up clothes; the dark dress was too tight and the sleeves tapered off just below my elbows.

Janna laughed.  “Oh yes you are.  You are a
major
part of this.  You think everyone out there came just to remember my father?  They adored him, of course, but I’m sure a good forty percent of our guests came solely for James’ acceptance of the crown and, subsequently, to meet you.  The next couple of days you are going to understand what it’s like to be the queen.”

I laughed in spite of the ill feeling in my stomach. 

“I’m not joking.”  Janna fixed me with a superior look.  She seemed to be chiding my attempt at lightheartedness.

“Well, you can’t be serious.”             

“Of course I am,” she scoffed.  “Mother demanded it and so it shall be done.”

Now I really did feel faint.  Part of me still hoped she was joking, but the look in her kohl-lined eyes told me otherwise.  My mouth went dry.  “Your mother demanded I pretend to be your queen?”

“Yes.”

“Do I have to?”  I asked wearily. “I mean, really, what’s stopping me from walking away?”

“Duty.”  Janna thrust a pair of heeled shoes at me.  “We have to maintain the facade.”

“What facade?”

“I don’t expect you to understand it, Lilith, because it doesn’t even make sense to me.  But the truth can sometimes be more damaging than a lie, and this is one of those times.”

“What are you saying?” 

Janna moved behind me and fluffed out the hair that she’d set in curls just before.  A glance in the mirror affirmed that I looked presentable enough with my makeup done by her skilled hand, but it was her reaction that I was looking for.

“I’m saying that we can’t let everyone know that James bit you by a mere accident or that you’re neither human nor vampire.  We had to…stretch the truth a bit, for everybody’s benefit.”

“Stretch the truth?”  I parroted.  “How?”

“I’ll explain later.  Right now, we have guests to greet.”

I followed Janna from my room where we’d spent the past hour preparing to make good impressions, out to the staircase where just days ago the king had been shot.  The memory of that solid, mortal weapon clutched in the man’s hand and the look he’d given me before he turned the gun on the King still haunted me. 

Today, the scene from the foot of the stairs was entirely different.  Now, people covered the steps, chatting freely, and spilled out the open doors onto the grandiose patio below.  Small candles illuminated freshly planted lilies, which lined either side of the pathway, and torches gleamed at the entrance of the maze, where a mass of people stood.  Everywhere I looked, people were moving around, an indomitable sea of black.  Hundreds had turned out to mourn the loss of their king.  And Janna was speaking to me as though nothing was the least bit out of the ordinary.  “How many guests are here?”  I murmured, feeling dizzy as I scanned the lot.  My hand clenched around the bannister, fingers turning white as I felt my resolve being sapped.

Unconcerned, Janna shrugged.  “Mother made all the arrangements.  If I had to guess I’d say upwards of three hundred.  Don’t worry; there won’t be too many people tonight.  This is short notice…an intimate affair, if you will.”

I nearly choked on the air.  “Three hundred isn’t a lot to you?”

“Hardly.  They come from all over, to show their respect and devotion.  If it weren’t so last minute you wouldn’t know what to do with yourself.  Regular proceedings usually would consist of a number closer to a thousand.”  She shrugged.

I bit my lip.  “All of a sudden three hundred doesn’t seem so bad.”

“I thought not.”  She failed to conceal a smile.  “Oh, there’s James.”

Janna indicated a spot before us; indeed, he was standing amidst a group of people at the mouth of the labyrinth, immersed in conversation.  There were so many bodies surrounding him, I wondered if he would even notice our presence.  As we made our way toward the group, however, my fears became unfounded as the little party dispersed, hurrying off in opposite directions.  James looked up.  And then he stared at me. 

It wasn’t a charmed sort of stare or even an uncertain one.  The clingy black dress hadn’t camouflaged my inability to blend in and it certainly hadn’t transformed me into something above my typical status as the mistake he was stuck with.  In fact, he didn’t seem to notice that I looked different at all.  He only looked at me with eyes so empty that I half thought I may have been transparent.  The way the firelight of the torches danced off my ghostly skin, I probably was.

“Lilith.”  He greeted me with a formal nod.

I didn’t answer, not that he noticed; A young woman whose dark hair was piled atop her head came up and stole James’ attention.  I dared look at Janna, hoping that I didn’t betray even a hint of jealousy.             

“Do you know all these people?”

“Most of them.”  She was casual, and I came to the conclusion that these large affairs were not planned only when tragedy struck.  “Just stick with me and you’ll be alright.”

I suspected my safety wasn’t the only reason she wanted me to stay with her, but considering she was my only friend here, I was willing to oblige.  “Ok, tell me now.  What should I know?  Any trivia questions?  Should I fake an accent?”

Janna laughed.  “Nobody expects you to know anything.  Just play it by ear.”

I frowned.  “I thought I was supposed to be keeping up appearances?”

“Playing coy will fit your part perfectly.”

Confused, I simply stared at her.  “I thought my part was to act like a queen?”

Janna smiled as she walked away, leaving me to wonder why she was so amused. I, for one, didn’t much enjoy speaking in circles, though it seemed to be her specialty.  I hurried after her, offering a smile to a young boy who stared at me slack-jawed as we passed.  “You don’t have to act as much as you may think.  A lot of your illusion is going to be rooted in how you really feel.  Awe-struck by this whole place, surprised by our existence, and grateful for James to have spared you.”

I weighed her face for a moment, expecting some comedic relief, but apparently she was serious.  “Exactly what part of that is supposed to be true?”  I hissed.

“Well, it’s a stretch.”  She admitted.  “But you
are
awe-struck by all of this, you have to admit.  Our customs and ceremonies and the way we live.  You may not
like
them, but they still are nothing compared to what you had expected.  And obviously you didn’t realize we were a real foe to you, since you were surprised when you found out the truth.  And James...”

“Good luck stretching that one.”  My voice dripped contempt, though it didn’t all come naturally.

“You aren’t grateful yet.”  She conceded.  “But you will be.”  Janna was confident enough in that fact that I almost might have believed her if I didn’t know any better.

“Ok, let’s recap. I’m happy your brothers attacked when I wasn’t even doing anything to provoke them.  The pain was excruciating, but it’s ok...I’m grateful that he bit me because I’ve always felt like an outcast longing to roam with the wolves.  What else?” 

“You’re glad he bit you because if he hadn’t you would have turned into a vampire.  You hate the idea of becoming one of those cold, heartless, soulless—”

“Janna!”  I interjected.  “I don’t understand.”

“Oh,” She looked at me guiltily. “Right.  I’ve forgotten to tell you the most important thing.  You are a human.  One hundred percent.  Or at least, you were. You were in the woods hiking with some friends, got lost, and then found by a vampire.  This vampire bit you and left you to turn.  James came along, but there was no way to save you other than to bite you himself to stop the transformation.  He thought it was a better fate, to spend your life as a werewolf.”

“Oh, how noble.”  The venom in my voice was poorly concealed.

“That’s the spirit!”  Janna looked excited now that I had seemingly caught on.

“One problem, though.” 

Her face fell.  “Which is...?”

“This story still involves one of your brothers—James—biting a human—that’s me.  Isn’t that the reason for the whole cover up?  To save Julius’ ass?  Now you’re just putting James on the line.”

“Of course not!  How do you think any of these people would respond to the knowledge that their king had bitten a vampire and not killed her?”  She paused for emphasis, but apparently that had been rhetorical because she rushed into her own answer.  “They’d think him weak.”

“Maybe he
is
weak!”  I couldn’t help it.  The lie made me angry.  “He had a chance to kill me and he chose not to take it.”

“Shh!”

Janna flashed a brilliant grin at a concerned-looking man passing nearby us.  She waited until the guest was out of ear shot before speaking again.  “I’m not going to debate my brother’s strength of character with you.  Perhaps you think James is weak, but I guarantee you there will be a few people in our midst who are desperate to prove before a large audience that they’re not.  If they find out, they will be willing to do what James could not.” 

“Just point me in the right direction and I’ll spare you the stress of lying to your people.”  It was a poorly conceived attempt at humor.

“You’re infuriating.”  Janna shook her head, though my words didn’t seem to infuriate her in the least.  In fact, she looked away coolly scanning the faces of the guests as though looking for somebody.

“I’m afraid I can’t let you sabotage yourself, Lilith.  I still have plans for you.”  James had joined our conversation, and judging by the slight smile on his lips, was amused by the exchange between his sister and myself. 

I opened my mouth, prepared to tell him exactly how I felt about his plans, but bit my tongue when a middle-aged man approached us swiftly.  He walked by me without so much as a glance, and with his eyes fixed on James, swept a gallant bow.

“Matthias,” James greeted the guest wearily.  But it wasn’t just his tone of voice that sounded worn out.  Even on his face I could see the exhaustion, which had been clouded by my irritation with him.  In all of the lies I had almost forgotten the reason we were all gathered.  On top of that, James was taking on the responsibilities of leader.  I almost took him for granted, but seeing the way he looked at the stooping man with unfaltering respect, I felt less inclined to give him a hard time.  “Please, that’s not necessary.”  James extended a hand and pulled him from the gesture. “I’ve known you all my life.”

The man straightened up to his full, impressive height, bearing a smile on his face.  He was sturdy-looking, and yet you could see by the lines on his face that he was at least twice James’ age.  The silver that streaked his hair certainly gave him a wizened-yet-dignified appearance.  “I’d always hoped I would live to see the day you would take the throne.  I loved your father, of course, but I knew it would be you that would take on the challenges of council.”  His eyes swam with some kind of misty affection.  Whether that was for James or his late father I couldn’t know, but either way there was something about the man that I liked.  “Oh, speaking of...”  His eyes shifted to me, seeking an introduction.

“This is Lilith.”  James turned to where I stood, trying to look like I belonged there.  I stepped forward with an extended hand, not wanting to seem rude.  The man looked at me oddly for a half moment before pulling me into a hug that crushed the air from my lungs. 

After an awkward moment Matthias stepped back, appraising me with unconcealed curiosity.  “The queen of tomorrow.  Rumors don’t do her justice.”  James laughed and I wasn’t sure if he thought that was funny or was just trying to be polite.  Probably both.  “I never expected this from you, James.  But I’m curious to know all about this intriguing beauty of yours.”  He smiled at me, and though the gesture was nice, I felt more like the puppy in the window than a human being.  He was talking about me like I wasn’t there or just didn’t understand plain English.

“I’m sure Lilith would love to share her stories with everyone at dinner.”  James cast me a glance from the corner of his eye. 

I smiled, just before James did something that took me by surprise.  Slipping his arm around my side, he pulled me into him close enough that I caught his scent—a hint of cinnamon that blended perfectly into the autumn night.  His touch sent a flutter through me, like butterflies flitting through my stomach.  The moment the thought crossed my mind, I remembered the girl who’d been in my shoes before, the one who I knew nothing about because I still hadn’t had the opportunity to discuss it with James.  My mood darkened a shade, but I forced a smile for Matthias.  “It was nice to meet you.”