SM 101: A Realistic Introduction (69 page)
Read SM 101: A Realistic Introduction Online
Authors: Jay Wiseman
Introduction
The Purpose of This Book
Why Am I Writing This?
Sexual Extremes
Who Is This Book For?
What is SM?
Is SM for You?
You May Already Be “Into SM”
Why On Earth Would Anybody Want to Do this Stuff in the First Place?
A Tough Decision
My Very Own, Official, “Coming Out” Chapter
The Sociology, Politics, and Economics of SM
Should You “Come Out” As Being Into SM?
Definitions
SM vs. Abuse
SM and Censorship
Basic Terms
Consent
The Silent Alarm
Safewords
The Ethics of Safewords
Non-Verbal Safewords
Checking In
Negotiation
To Help You Remember
“Pre” Pre-Session Negotiations
Group Negotiations
Post-Session Negotiations and Feedback
Second-Session Negotiations
Conclusion
Negotiation Forms
Variability
Learn How It Feels
Setting the Scene
Other Matters
Don’t Do This If Anyone Involved Is Drunk or Stoned
Signs and Signals
Men Look¡ng for Women
Women Looking For Men
Women Looking For Women
Men Looking For Men
Introducing SM Into an Existing Relationship
Some Basic Bondage Principles
Types of Rope
Knots
Basic Bondage Techniques
Breast Bondage
Genital Bondage
The Hogtie Position
Usiang a Bar as Bondage Implement
Tying A Submissive to the Bed
Notes and Hints
First Bondage
Precautions When Playing in Isolated Arear
Self-Bondage
On Being Untied
Gags
Blindfolds
Ear Plugs
Hoods
Handcuffs
Leather Cuffs
Suspension
Chains, Locks, Etc.
Giving and Receiving Erotic Pain
What Is Pain?
Giving Pain
Receiving Pain
Straight Time and Checking In Later
Where to Whip
Whipping Positions
Hands-On Flagellation
Paddling
The Riding Crop
Whips and Floggers
Straps
Canes
The Pounder
Conclusion
Clamping the Nipples
Clamping the Genitals
Clamping Other Parts of the Body
Lubricants: Advantages, Disadvantages, and Dangers
Using Your Hands and Mouth
Hot/Cold Play
Conventional Sex Toys
Other Forms of Sensation
Masturbation Games
Dominant/Submissive Interactions
On Being a Dominant
On Being a Submissive
Beginning and Ending a Session
Beginning a Submissive’s Training
The Four Basic Duties of a Submissive
The Collar
Basic Position Training
Arm positions
Leg Positions
Combinations
Speech Training
Slave Duties
Punishment
“24/7” Relationships
Finding Your Local Community
When There Is No Local Community
Parties
More Formal Organizational Structures
What About Leaving Marks?
SM Duting Pregmaney
Common Causes of SM Disasters
First Aid and CPR Training
First Aid Supplies
Common SM Emergencies
Safety Checklist
What To Do If a Condom Fails
A Novice Woman’s Quick Reference Guide to Erotically Dominating a Submissive Man
Constructing an SM Starter Set
Let’s Start With Your Mind
Now Let’s Consider Your Body
A Basic SM Starter Kit
Buying “Formal” SM Gear
Appendix I - Sample Event Rules
Appendix II: SM and the Internet
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