How We Lived (Entangled Embrace) (6 page)

Em threw her head back and laughed. “Why can’t I call him that? It’s true. You must be the only girl in a ten-mile radius who does not pool into goo at his feet.”

I gave her a look.

“Okay, sorry, sorry. I know, you always hated that nickname. Seriously, though. How did it feel to see him again? Did it make you sad?”

The car kicked to life beneath me. “Yes. But it also felt familiar and normal and…nice.” Hell, it felt more than nice, but I wasn’t ready to admit that to anyone but myself yet. I should’ve asked him to come to the frat party. I wanted him there.

“Normal’s good for you right now.” She backed out of the driveway and took a left at the end of the street, squinting in the late-evening sun. “You’re worried about Bear, huh?”

“Bear…and Kyle.”

“Kyle? Trust me, Kyle isn’t feeling much anymore. I doubt he cares if you see Chase.”

My hands tightened around the seat. Em was always blunt. I was used to it, but this hit somewhere deep. I took a few steadying breaths. “Thanks for that.”

“Ugh, I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant to say. What I mean is, Kyle’s in a better place now. Do you really think he’s mad at him? If I were you, I’d be more worried about Bear.”

I let the last part sink in as Em drove toward the outskirts of town where the houses started to get a little nicer and farther apart. Near the college, the houses were bigger—either because the deans lived in them, or because they were student housing.

I
was
worried about Bear. We couldn’t bring ourselves to talk about the actual accident, though. The topic was like Chase—off-limits. “I was with Bear when I saw Chase. He almost flipped out.”

Em nodded like the whole thing made perfect sense. “He’s über protective of you.” She took the next right and then pulled alongside the curb in front of the frat house and parked.

“You could say that.”

Kids our age were in groups on the lawn. There was also what looked like an epic battle of tetherball going on. A guy hung from the second-story window with a spotlight trained on the match.

Em twisted in her seat and grabbed my hand. “Let’s just have fun tonight. Like old times.”

Yes, please.
I needed life to be like old times.

We played beer pong first. Partners. I had zero beer-pong skills, so yeah, I was trashed pretty early on. Em’s boyfriend came over not long after she suckered the opposing team into a third rematch, which we lost horribly. He didn’t waste much time before trying to haul her off to an empty bedroom. She looked to me, eyebrows raised.

I just smiled and waved. “Have fun.” She didn’t need to worry about me. I’d be fine.

She hesitated, her eyebrows even higher now. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Please. I’m good.” At least one of us was getting some.

The friend he’d walked over with stayed after they left. If I’d counted correctly, and I wasn’t sure I had the ability at the moment, he’d had three shots and funneled one beer in the ten minutes we stood together.

“Em didn’t mention you were so hot.”

That was his pickup line, really, but I was so free and uncaring I fell for it. “Hot, huh? Wanna dance?”

Before he could answer, I grabbed his green Sigma Alpha shirt and pulled him to the dance floor. The room swayed a little, but I waved my hands in the air anyway. I liked this not thinking thing. Or maybe it was the not caring thing. I turned and swayed my hips into his.

“Now that was sexy.”

What I wouldn’t give for Chase to call me sexy. Whoops. Wait. I meant Bear. I totally meant Bear. I wished he’d act like he wanted me. Saying it wasn’t cutting it anymore. Drunk Frat Boy grazed his fingertips from my shoulders to my hips before he pressed himself against me. He was hard.

Holy crap. I had made this boy hard. And I’d only been dancing with him for like, a minute.

Desire bloomed in my stomach. I pushed back against him and he moaned before licking my earlobe, which felt a little weird. I twisted to face him once again and placed my arms around his neck. He lowered his mouth and brushed his lips over mine. When I did the same back, he practically fell on me and shoved his tongue into my mouth, his needy lips pressed to mine. The front of his jeans tented as he rubbed against me.

I felt alive.

He broke away and moved his hands to the nape of my neck. “God, you are so fucking hot.”

Holy. Crap. Not just hot, but
fucking
hot. That was good. I ran my fingers across his shirt. He was muscly, but not as muscly as Bear or Chase.

He smiled, a dimple in his cheek. “Like what you feel?”

I
did
like. I answered with another kiss, then he led me off to the side and to the stairs Em’s boyfriend had dragged her up not long ago. He opened a door, ushered me in, and pressed me against the other side. His knee maneuvered between my legs.

I gasped. This was quick. This was…soon. I didn’t know how I felt about it, but this was what I wanted. Escape. Freedom. Feeling.

“Oh fuck, if you keep making noises like that, I won’t last,” he groaned.

He yanked my shirt up and buried his head in my chest, leaving a trail of wet kisses over my bra. He tugged on my shirt again, forcing my hands in the air so he could pull it off. I snaked my hands under his shirt, but then he yanked that off, too.

I didn’t know how I knew to do this, but everything I did seemed right because once his jeans hit the floor, he slid his hands all over me. In my hair, on my butt, lifting me and carrying me until my back hit the mattress. Everything felt as awesome as I’d imagined. He acted as if he couldn’t get enough of me. It’s what I’d wanted Bear to do.

He leaned over and parted my legs with his knee while his hand slowly made its way over my stomach to the top of my jeans.

“Wait,” I gasped between kisses.

He pulled away. “What? What’s wrong?” He looked horrified I’d tell him to stop.

The guy needed me. I could feel it through his boxers. I didn’t want to disappoint him. “Protection?”

He flirted with the top of my jeans and grinned before pecking me on the nose. He reached inside the top drawer of the stand next to the bed, felt around, then came back empty. “Shit. I’ll be right back.”

I lay still for a little while until the whole world started to spin. And yet, despite the spinning, I could actually
think
. Well enough to know this was a horrible idea, anyway. I reached in my pocket for my phone and scrolled. I still had Chase’s number if it hadn’t changed.

He answered after the first ring. “What’s wrong?”

The concern in his voice made me tear up. “Why do you think something’s wrong?”

“It’s one in the morning, Kels. You also haven’t called my phone in forever.”

“Oh.” That was actually some good investigation skills. I giggled.

“You’re drunk.”

“Mmm-hmm. And…” I thought for a second. “I’m about to do something really stupid. Like, really stupid. So if you would be so awesome as to come to Sigma Alpha to pick me up, I’d be really happy.” There. That sounded like I wasn’t drunk at all.

Complete silence, then he said, “You’re shit-faced.”

“Hmm. Well—”

“Fuck.”

The dial tone buzzed in my ear. Chase hung up on me. Jerk.

I slipped my phone back into my pocket and glanced around the room. It was kind of messy, which grossed me out. It was messy, unknown, not like Chase’s room had been messy, but known.

What was I doing hooking up with a random guy? This wasn’t me. I needed to get out of here. I tried to stand, but the room started to spin again so I lay back down and squeezed my eyes shut. It didn’t help. It almost seemed worse. I picked a spot on the ceiling to focus on and then counted to one hundred. Feeling better, I got off the bed to get my shirt, but as soon as I stood, the door opened and…the guy stepped in.

His hair was messy and his boxers hung low on his hips. When his gaze found mine, he held it. His eyes were piercing.

The way his gaze devoured me made me want to hurl.

I crossed my arms in front of my chest and moved around a chair so it was between us. “What’s your name, anyway?” I asked.

“David.”

“Hi, David. My name’s Kelsey.” I made sure to tell him Kelsey. No one called me Kels but Kyle and Chase. That was it. No one else. Not even Bear.

David held up a square package. “Well, Kelsey, we’re in luck.” He walked toward the bed and threw the condom on the nightstand. Sitting down, he called me back to him.

I searched the floor for my shirt and saw it near the door. “So, what’s your major?” I asked casually as I edged over to where it lay on the floor.

David caught my hand and pulled me down on the bed. His tongue prodded my mouth open and then it was like he was eating me up so fast I could barely breathe. I pushed him away.

He traced the lines on my face with his finger. “Hot.” He found my bottom lip next. “So fucking hot. What I wouldn’t give to see those lips around my cock.”

I stiffened. Hell no. Not happening.

He must have noticed because he blurted more words. “We don’t have to. We can do whatever you want. Whatever you’re comfortable with.”

I opened my mouth to tell him I wasn’t into this anymore when he fell onto me again. I pushed him away harder. “I’m sorry.” I eased myself out from under him. “This isn’t me. I don’t do things like this.”

“What? Have a little fun?”

“Yes, actually. Fun. It’s not really my style lately.”

Someone shouted my name from the hallway. “Kels!”

David sighed and propped himself on his elbow. “Was it the blow job comment? You don’t have to. Really. I was just caught up in the moment.”

“Kels!” The yell sounded close, along with banging doors.

Holy shit. I’d called Chase, hadn’t I? “I’m sorry,” I said to David, then sat up.

“What?”

The door, which hid me safely away, flew open. Chase was framed in the doorway, his dark features darker than normal. His hair stuck up in different directions and one side of his white T-shirt was tucked into his jeans while the other side was out and wrinkly, like he had hastily thrown on clothes.

I stood. “Chase?”

“Kels.” He sighed in relief. His gaze wandered down. “What the fuck are you doing?”

I crossed my hands over my bra again. “I’m…” I had no idea what I was doing. No freaking clue. His expression sobered me in an instant. Mad, sure, but disappointed, too.

David stood behind me. “Who’s this?”

Half a foot taller than David, Chase towered over him even before he pushed him down on the bed. “You shut the fuck up.”

David held out his hands. “Listen, I didn’t know she was your girl. I’m sorry. I thought she wanted it.”

“Wanted it?” Chase stared him down, his eyes a very different shade of brown, before looking over at me. “Where’s your shirt?”

I guessed this wasn’t a good time to point out to David that Chase and I weren’t dating. We were…friends. I pointed toward the door and Chase walked over to pick my shirt up off the floor. He threw it at me and I turned away before putting it on, thankful to be able to cover myself.

“Chase, I—”

“We’ll talk later. Just come on.”

Later. It was always later with him. What if none of us had a later? He knew as much as me that later wasn’t always a sure thing.

David chuckled. “I didn’t want to sleep with the whore anyway. Just looked like a nice piece of ass.”

Chase halted. Then he spun around. His shoulder bumped mine as he made a straight line for the bed. I tried to grab him, but it was too late. He lifted David by the shoulders, steadied him, and then reared back and punched him in the face.

David’s hands went immediately to his nose. “Fuck, dude.” When he pulled away, bright-red blood had pooled in his palms. “I’m fucking bleeding.”

As sick as it was, I was glad he punched him. Chase grabbed my hand, led me from the party, and to his car. He slammed his fists on the steering wheel a few times before leaning over, grabbing my seat belt, and locking it in place around me.

I let out the breath I’d been holding. “I’m sorry. You didn’t have to come.”

“I didn’t have to come? You called me and said you needed me.”

I crossed my arms. “Well, you didn’t have to come if you’re going to be so pissy about it.”

He shook his head. “I’m not mad, I’m fucking scared. I’m not supposed to be driving. Only to and from work, and to my drinking driver classes, and— Oh, Jesus Christ, why am I explaining this to you? You’re drunk off your ass. You won’t even remember this tomorrow.”

Oh my God. What had I done? I rubbed my temples. “I’ll drive.”

“Yeah. Like that’s a good idea. You’re drunk. If you get pulled over, or something worse, we’ll both be screwed.”

Dread washed over me. I couldn’t believe I’d just said I would drive. We both knew what could happen. “I’m sorry. I just…”

“You’re drunk. Just sit and don’t…talk.”

The drive home took five minutes, but it was one of the longest—and sobering— five minutes of my life. I was scared for him. I was mortified at what he’d seen. And I was so mad at myself. I could have hurt Chase just because I felt like forgetting everything for a night.

When we pulled into his driveway, he said, “Don’t let anyone ever call you a whore again.”

“I didn’t—”

“Never. Again,” he seethed.

I nodded and got out. There was no sense in trying to explain myself tonight. When Chase was furious, it was best to let him get it out of his system. Before I even made it to the front of the car, he was right there. I held my hands out to stop him from coming too close. “Don’t look at me right now. Please.”

His hands fell to his sides and I walked straight for my house. Right as I stepped on the porch, the beep of the lock mechanisms clicked into place on the car.

I had every intention of going to my own room, but Kyle’s was right there. I slipped past the still-empty boxes in the hall and closed the door carefully behind me so Dad wouldn’t wake up. He was on the couch. So much for their talk earlier.

I sat on the bed and faced Chase’s bedroom. His curtains framed the window. He came in, threw his keys on his dresser, and stripped off his shirt.
Yes, definitely much nicer abs than David’s.