How We Lived (Entangled Embrace) (3 page)

“Yeah. Taste testing.”

“Then I’m good.”

Vito was a great guy. One of the best, actually. He was just looking out for me. He knew my story, like everyone did, but didn’t pry. Not like my mom. My voice must have sounded off enough that he knew I needed an excuse to get out of the house tonight.

He was right. There was no way in hell I could stay here with Kels and Bear right next door. I’d shoot myself in the foot before the night was done just to feel better.

Chapter Two

-Kelsey-

Bear filled my doorframe length- and width-wise, all six foot some odd inches of him in burly muscle. “Come on. Let me take you out,” he pleaded.

Seeing the uncertainty on my face, he shouldered his way into my room and sat on the bed. The mattress dipped. With him in here, the space seemed smaller. About as small as the rest of the house felt without Kyle. Like a vise that kept turning.

Bear wasn’t his real name. His real name was Ronan, but no one called him that. Not unless they wanted his meaty fists connecting with their face. Bear suited him much better anyway. The nickname began in junior high football when he first moved here. He’d been so much bigger than everyone else then. He made friends with Kyle and Chase, and ever since, it wasn’t just the two of them anymore, it was the three of them.

He had no problem intimidating people on and off the field, but he had heart and a soft touch when he wanted to. He covered my hand with his huge one. “I want to make it up to you. Not being able to go to Kyle’s funeral? I’m sorry.”

I’d suspected his reasons for not coming were more than his “Got to work” excuse. I didn’t complain. Bear had his own demons he needed to work out from that night. He was actually in the crash that killed Kyle. Physically, he’d only suffered a concussion. It was more the mental that got to him, though. I didn’t want to think about what he might have seen that night.

Admitting it seemed wrong, but I hadn’t wanted Bear there for the special ceremony anyway. He didn’t know how the three of us said good-bye. “You know I was okay with you having to work. I get it. Besides, I was fine.”

Though Chase hadn’t left my mind since earlier, I left him out of this conversation. Bear didn’t need to know he came. He wouldn’t be happy about it. In fact, he’d be downright pissed. We kind of had this unspoken rule that Chase Crowley was off-limits.

He frowned and picked at my comforter. “Please come out with me. We only have a few days left before you go back for summer classes.”

If I wasn’t too tired to complain about being tired, I’d have told Bear no. Instead, I gave in. We really hadn’t talked much lately, let alone seen each other. The last week of school was crazy with finals, which I completely bombed, and for the last week or so I’d been home, he’d had to work a lot so I had spent plenty of quality time with myself in my bedroom. “Sure. Nothing crowded, okay?”

His face relaxed and he squeezed my shoulder. “Whatever my girl wants.”

We’d been seeing each other ever since the accident. With Kyle dead and Chase not an option, I didn’t have anyone but him. We started hanging out more and more. He was someone I could talk to. He was there for me. If I needed him, he’d drop everything. Then one time, instead of talking, he kissed me. I was shocked at first. I didn’t make a habit of crushing on Kyle’s friends. For one, I’d never hear the end of it, and two, his friends were my friends.

Two grades below the boys in high school, I’d watched Chase and Kyle go through the junior and senior girls who passed as even remotely attractive. Bear was different. When he had a girlfriend, he had a girlfriend. And not just for the weekend or a couple hours. I never knew he thought of me that way, or looked at me that way, but he was kind of sort of…great. He never pushed me for more, and we never sat down and had the oh-my-God-what-is-this-relationship talk. We were taking it slow. Easy.

I needed easy.

Bear towed me along behind him as he made his way through the house and then lifted me into his truck. When he got in on the other side, he said, “I know this is probably the last thing you want to do, but it’s good to get out. Ya know?”

I couldn’t help but smile at him. He was trying so hard to look after me. “Yeah. I know.”

He cranked the engine and let his hand drop to the seat. I picked it up, pulled it to my lap, and traced his ginormous fingers with the tips of my own. Every time we were away from each other, it was harder and harder to pick up where we left off.

Once we arrived at the restaurant, Bear asked for a secluded table. The waitress led us to a quiet corner in the back.

When we sat, he scooted his chair right next to mine and draped his arm along the back. “I wish Kyle was around to see us together.”

I stared down at my hands. It still hurt to hear Kyle’s name. Quadruple that if the person was wishing he were still around. Hope was a cruel feeling when there was zero chance of it happening. An awkward silence descended over us.

Bear shifted in his seat and reached for my hand. “What’s wrong?”

Dread settled in the pit of my stomach. I could feel it. He was dangerously close to comforting me and it wasn’t what I needed anymore. I shook my head and tried to smile. “I’m okay.”

He leaned forward and pressed a quick kiss to my lips. “I wish I could take away your pain,” he said. “Take away the sad, lost look in your eyes.” He paused and searched my face. “I know it hurts. I know it sucks. I’m worried about you.”

“No need.” I unraveled the cloth napkin from my silverware and folded it onto my lap. “I won’t break. At least not until after dinner. I’m kind of hungry.” I smiled without feeling, as fake as the line I just fed him. I wasn’t hungry. Not even a little bit.

He pressed his fingers into my shoulder and leaned closer. “Order whatever you want. Order two of whatever you want. Just don’t lose that smile.”

I hated lying to him. He was too…good.

I ordered the lasagna and stuffed down half, dragging the other half all over my plate so it looked like I ate more than I did. After Bear finished his chicken Parm, he ordered a beer and then left for the bathroom.

The candle in the middle of the table flickered and I clasped my hand around the glass holder. The flame reminded me of camping with Chase and Kyle. How gooey our fingers used to get when we made s’mores. How the front of my body would burn from the heat, but the back would stay as damp and cool as the night air. How the fire would illuminate the boys’ faces. All shadows and light. Spooky, mischievous, and…perfect.

Bear touched my hand and I jumped.

His eyes were stormy. “We should leave.”

I motioned toward the empty spot in front of him. “But your beer hasn’t come yet.”

“Chase fucking Crowley is here. At the bar.”

My heart free-fell into my stomach. It was as if my daydreaming had conjured him.

“See, I knew it would make you more upset.” He turned in the direction of the exit and swore.

I tensed. Bear was really pissed. I needed to calm him before he did something stupid. “I’m fine.” I really was, too. If I were going to freak out, it would’ve been earlier.

He shook his head. “Your face is pale and you’ve got a death grip on that candle.”

I made myself relax, dropped the candle, and pulled Bear’s seat away from the table. “Chase is allowed to go out in public.”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t kick his ass for it.”

“Actually, that’s exactly what it means.”

His hands clenched. “It’s not right. A lot of people are pissed. You’ve been at school. You don’t know what’s been going on.”

“Well, tell me. If it’s about Kyle, I should know.”

Bear sat, finally, his body rigid, uptight, as if he expected a fight. “Mob. Rule.”

Mob rule? How does that have anything to do with Kyle?
“What does that mean?”

He sighed. “Never mind.”

His hand was warm and rough when I grabbed it. “No, really. What are you talking about?”

Bear’s eyes were brighter than normal, an electric shade of blue. “Mob rule. When a group of people get together to make something wrong, right.”

I shook my head, not understanding. No one could make Kyle’s death right. Not unless scientists had discovered how to bring someone back to life.

He leaned in closer. “Let’s just say I’ve heard some things.”

“Some things? Like what?”

“A couple of guys—Jimmy and those guys from Kyle’s welcome home party—came to visit me at the shop the day after Chase’s sentencing and wanted to know if I’d be interested in teaching him a lesson.”

My head started to pound. No. This was bad.
Please tell me nothing happened. Please.
“You didn’t do anything, did you?”

His eyes narrowed. “
I
didn’t.”

The words sucked the air right out of my lungs. He hadn’t, but someone else had. I could tell. I took my hand away from his. “But—” I paused as the waiter finally brought his beer.

When he walked away, Bear cut me off. “If you don’t want to know, don’t ask.” He put the bottle to his lips and took a huge gulp, downing about half.

I gripped the edge of the table. Hurting Chase wouldn’t bring Kyle back. Nothing would.

After looking at me from the corner of his eye, he took another swig and placed the now almost empty bottle on the table. “What do you want to do now?” His voice was flat, verging on annoyed.

Did he really think I’d be happy to hear Chase had gotten hurt? He knew me better than that. At least, he should’ve. I took the candle in my hands again. The flame bowed and sputtered.

When I didn’t answer, he sighed. “Listen. I’m sorry I brought it up. I don’t even know if they did anything.” He brushed the back of my hand with his thumb. “C’mon, Kelsey. We only have so many days left. I want to make the best of them.”

He asked about school so we talked a little about my summer classes. I didn’t tell him the real reason I needed to take them, but then again, he didn’t ask. After a few minutes, Bear seemed to relax. He turned around less and less to check the entrance.

As soon as he swallowed the last of his beer, he stood. “You ready?”

We passed Chase on the way out, which was more awkward than I thought it would be. Bear walked fast, pulling me along behind him. He made a point not to look Chase’s way while I tried to be more subtle. Chase’s hand was around the stool of the dark-haired girl next to him. Probably his date. Girls were always around him. They’d been following him around since the sandbox days. He ignored me, but he knew I was there just like I knew he was there. Like a magnetic force. Being best friends most of your life, you had a knowledge, a pull like that.

Before the door closed behind us, I glanced over my shoulder. He was watching us like I knew he would be, but his gaze was locked lower, on my hand in Bear’s.

…

-Chase-

Vito’s smelled like heaven. Spices and the sweet smell of tomato sauce assaulted me when I walked in. Better than the smell was the taste. At the bar, the boss, Vito’s wife, placed a plate in front of me.

I picked up my fork, ready to dive right in. I never met a dish of his I didn’t like. “I can already tell this is going to be awesome.”

The older woman smiled. Her kind face was stacked full with wrinkles. “He said you will like.”

I chuckled. He knew me all right. “I’m sure I will.”

A glow I could only describe as pride lit her face. “He wants to put it on the menu.”

I cut a piece of the stuffed chicken off with my fork. “You tell him I agree.”

She blushed, which highlighted her age. “But you haven’t tried yet.”

“Trust me, the smell alone is enough to make me agree.”

“Hey, Nana,” a voice broke in.

Rosie, Vito’s granddaughter, stopped next to me. She was pretty. We’d worked together in the kitchen a couple times and even hung out after work. A year older than me, she had her shit together, which I so obviously did not. She owned an apartment down the block and worked full-time as a receptionist at a dentist’s office. She moved here to help out at her grandparents’ restaurant when she could. The best thing about her was she didn’t know my past. Not entirely, anyway.

She was nice, and funny, and cute, but she wasn’t Kelsey Larkin.

“Hey,” I said.

A big smile crossed her face and she gave me a hug. “Hey, Chase.”

I hugged her back, but it felt nothing like having Kels in my arms.

She pouted. “I didn’t know you were helping out today.”

Had we been in high school, I would have been all over that shit. Who was I kidding? If I’d met her outside of the last year and a half, I still would’ve been all over that shit. “I’m not working for your grandfather tonight. I’m here strictly on Community Outreach business. Actually, I practically begged your grandfather to make me some food.”

“I’ve been begging him to make me food since I was a little girl.” She ran around the bar, gave her nana a hug, and then came back around to sit next to me.

I took a bite of Vito’s new dish. “Mmm. This is good.”

She leaned over and breathed in deep. “Is that his new concoction?”

I nodded. “It’s delicious.”

“Can I…try?” A small smile toyed at her lips before she licked them. “Just a taste?”

Crap. I’d tried to put out enough unavailable vibes for her to get, but I couldn’t be rude to Vito’s granddaughter. Also, girls like her weren’t used to getting turned down. She knew what she had and used it to her full advantage.

I handed her my fork. “Sure.”

She frowned, but took a bite. “Mmm,” she moaned. “It’s so good.” She licked the fork one last time and then handed it back to me. “So, what are your plans tonight?”

I looked at the fork. Yep, she knew what she was doing. As long as she never took it too far, I wouldn’t say anything. I didn’t want to embarrass the girl. “You’re looking at them.”

“Well”—she twirled her finger along the wood of the bar—“my friends and I—”

“Chase, my boy.” Vito pushed through the swinging doors of the kitchen. “You like?”

Rosie’s body sagged a little on the stool.

Thank God for the interruption. I wasn’t up for the whole “I killed my best friend in a car accident and I think I’m in love with his sister even though I’ll probably never get a shot with her” talk tonight.

“It’s so good, Vito. Seriously.” I wiped my face with the napkin. “When do you want to start adding it to the menu? They’re going to love it.”

“As soon as possible.” The smile he’d just worn faltered as his eyes locked on something behind me.

I glanced over my shoulder. Bear stood a few feet from me, hands balled at his sides. Son of a bitch. He was here?
They
were here? His eyes narrowed but I turned away. This was not the time to have a discussion—or whatever that discussion might lead to—with Bear. He’d always had a hot temper.