How to Rise Above Abuse (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (37 page)

I must take care of myself because no one else is trustworthy.

I need the approval of other people in order to be happy.

I will be loved if I am good.

I will never let anyone get close enough to me to hurt me again.

I will never measure up.

My feelings are less important than the feelings of others.

My feelings are not important at all.

My mistakes only confirm my worthlessness.

Whatever the contributing factors to your low estimation of your worth, they are held in place by negative thinking that you have embraced over the years. But the low opinion of yourself can be overcome by replacing those negative words with God’s Word:

“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—
his good, pleasing and perfect will”

(R
OMANS
12:2).

The people of Israel “groaned in their slavery and cried out, and their cry for help because of their slavery went up to God” (Exodus 2:23).

God heard their cry and raised up a resilient though somewhat reluctant deliverer. Moses, along with his brother, Aaron, approached the Egyptian Pharaoh about allowing the Israelites to go and conduct a feast to the Lord in the wilderness. In utter disregard to the God of the Israelites, Pharaoh not only refused the request but multiplied the Israelites’ misery by no longer providing straw to help make bricks, yet required that they maintain the same level of production.

When the production levels fell, the Egyptian taskmasters beat the Israelite foremen. In consternation the foremen confront Moses and Aaron, saying,

“May the L
ORD
look upon you and judge you!
You have made us a stench to Pharaoh and his officials
and have put a sword in their hand to kill us”

(E
XODUS
5:21).

As happened in the case of the Israelites, those who have been extensively victimized generally struggle with severe emotional side effects such as…

Those who have a low sense of self-worth usually find themselves…

Those who have a warped view of themselves and others often have a warped view of God. When people feel unworthy of love, respect, and approval from others, often they feel even more unworthy of God’s love, respect, and approval.

Their faulty beliefs lead them to draw faulty conclusions about God, and their wrong beliefs about God serve only to sabotage their relationship with God and kill any hope of being valued and used by God.

If you struggle with feeling devalued and insignificant, remember Jesus’ words:

“Consider the ravens:
They do not sow or reap,
they have no storeroom or barn;
yet God feeds them.
And how much more valuable you are than birds!”

(L
UKE
12:24).

Worth Your Weight in Gold

Q
UESTION
:
“What does the Bible say about my worth?”

A
NSWER
:
Perhaps you’ve heard the expression that someone is “worth his weight in gold.” This saying actually comes from the Bible—you’ll find it in Lamentations 4:2. Just think about how much worth that would literally be!
If gold were selling at $250 per ounce, one pound (16 ounces) of gold would be worth $4,000. And a person who weighs 150 pounds would be worth $600,000—well over half a million dollars.
²⁴

Interestingly, the Bible presents a person’s worth as too great to be measured in mere monetary terms. Peter says that your faith alone is “more precious than gold” (1 Peter 1:7
NKJV
). Are you beginning to see how much you, combined with your faith, are worth in the eyes of God? You are indeed precious to God. You have God-given worth—in fact, this is how much He loves you:

“This is how God showed his love among us:
He sent his one and only Son into the world
that we might live through him”

(1 J
OHN
4:9).

The victims of abuse often form various addictions or dependencies, such as dependency…

Addiction

Q
UESTION
:
“Why is addiction so common among people who have been victimized?”