How to Rise Above Abuse (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (16 page)

BOOK: How to Rise Above Abuse (Counseling Through the Bible Series)
2.77Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub

Legalism and Obedience

Q
UESTION
:
“What is the difference between legalism and biblical obedience?”

A
NSWER
:
Legalism is conforming outwardly to God’s or man’s standard for righteous behavior while ignoring God’s standard for righteous attitudes, convictions, values, and thoughts. Biblical obedience is conforming outwardly to God’s righteous standard while being conformed inwardly to the character of Christ through the enabling grace of God.

 


In legalism,
the resource is self-effort and the motive is self-promotion. Legalism results in pride and approaching God on the basis of your performance.


In obedience,
the resource is the Spirit of God and the motive is to glorify God. Obedience results in humility and approaching God on the basis of Christ’s performance.

In Christ Jesus, God has fulfilled His promise:

“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you;
I will remove from you your heart of stone
and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you
and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws”

(E
ZEKIEL
36:26-27).

II. C
HARACTERISTICS OF
S
PIRITUAL
A
BUSE

They came from opposite sides of the tracks. One was refined, respected, and revered—after all, he was a Pharisee. He had an “in” with God. The other was despised, disdained, and dejected—after all, he was a tax collector. He was a spiritual “outcast.”

Both the Pharisee and tax collector said a prayer to God. The Pharisee stood up and said, “God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get” (Luke 18:11-12). So went the prayer of the Pharisee.

By contrast, the tax collector stood at a distance. He wouldn’t even look up to heaven. He beat his chest and poured out his heart, “God, have mercy on me, a sinner” (verse 13).

Jesus spoke this parable to those who trust in their own righteousness, who exercise spiritual snobbery toward any who don’t “measure up.” He said it was the tax collector, and not the Pharisee, who “went home justified before God” (verse 14). The tax collector expressed a humble dependency upon God, which resulted in the forgiveness of his sins. Jesus then said,

“Everyone who exalts himself will be humbled,
and he who humbles himself will be exalted”

(L
UKE
18:14).

A. What Characterizes Spiritually Abusive Leaders?

While some religious groups are free of abuse, others are occasionally abusive, and still others are intensely abusive. The people especially vulnerable to systemic spiritual abuse belong to groups where all the power is at the top and average members are subject to the dictates of those over them. Therefore, the structure of a religious organization is of paramount importance in identifying the probability that spiritual abuse occurs. The apostle Peter reflected the heart of humility vital for every spiritual leader when he said,

“To the elders among you,
I appeal as a fellow elder, a witness of Christ’s sufferings
and one who also will share in the glory to be revealed:
Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not
because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be;
not greedy for money, but eager to serve;
not lording it over those entrusted to you,
but being examples to the flock”

(1 P
ETER
5:1-3).

The Traits of Spiritually Abusive Leaders

Spiritually abusive leaders are…

A
UTHORITARIAN
10

— Implying that God communicates with His people only through a hierarchy of power

— Claiming to have been called and established by God Himself

— Boasting that the leaders speak for God and expecting followers to support and obey them without question

But the Bible says, “Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted” (Matthew 23:12).

I
MAGE-CONSCIOUS
11

— Seeking to present an image of perfect righteousness

— Misrepresenting their personal history to wrongly portray a special relationship to God

— Minimizing or covering up their mistakes and character flaws

But the Bible says, “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of dead men’s bones and everything unclean” (Matthew 23:27).

S
UPPRESSIVE OF
C
RITICISM

— Determining all issues at the top level of the organization and demanding compliance by the members

— Curtailing individual thinking by saying such individuality leads to division and doubts about God

— Maintaining that those who question or seek to correct
anything about the organization are actually challenging God’s authority

But the Bible says, “A rebuke impresses a man of discernment more than a hundred lashes a fool…Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid” (Proverbs 17:10; 12:1).

P
ERFECTIONISTIC
12

— Demanding flawless obedience

— Condemning failure of any type or magnitude

— Promoting pride, elitism, and arrogance

But the Bible says, “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18).

U
NBALANCED

— Flaunting their distinctiveness to validate their claim that they have a “special” relationship with God

— Carrying biblical law to the extreme

— Majoring on the minor issues

But the Bible says, “Woe to you Pharisees, because you give God a tenth of your mint, rue and all other kinds of garden herbs, but you neglect justice and the love of God. You should have practiced the latter without leaving the former undone” (Luke 11:42).

C
OERCIVE
13

— Using any tactic available to get followers to disregard their own logic and do what the leader demands

— Demanding submission by claiming that the messages they receive come directly from God

— Deluding members by presenting themselves as the only ones who can properly interpret God’s Word to the people

But the Bible says, “They want to be teachers of the law, but they do not know what they are talking about or what they so confidently affirm” (1 Timothy 1:7).

I
NTIMIDATING
14

— Threatening members routinely with punishment or excommunication in order to gain compliance

— Holding the possibility of eternal condemnation over the heads of followers in order to force submission

— Predicting financial ruin or physical calamity for disobedient members in order to assure obedience

But the Bible says, “Woe to the shepherds…who only take care of themselves! Should not shepherds take care of the flock? You eat the curds, clothe yourselves with the wool and slaughter the choice animals, but you do not take care of the flock” (Ezekiel 34:2-3).

T
ERRORIZING
15

— Imparting fear, shame, self-doubt, identity confusion, and guilt to members

— Blaming problems within the organization on the sinfulness of the congregation

— Overemphasizing the problems of followers and presenting strict obedience as the only solution

But the Bible says, “You have not strengthened the weak or healed the sick or bound up the injured. You have not brought back the strays or searched for the lost. You have ruled them harshly and brutally” (Ezekiel 34:4).

C
ONDEMNING
16

— Heaping condemnation on outsiders and anyone who leaves the congregation

— Teaching that followers will join the ranks of the condemned if they deviate from the teachings of the leaders

— Blaming individual members for failures within the organization

But the Bible says, “How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?” (Matthew 7:4).

D
ISCRIMINATING
17

— Promoting church hierarchy

— Responding to people according to their titles and roles

— Instructing average members that their needs are less important than the needs of the leaders

But the Bible says, “Beware of the teachers of the law. They like to walk around in flowing robes and love to be greeted in the marketplaces and have the most important seats in the synagogues and the places of honor at banquets” (Luke 20:46).

L
EGALISTIC
18

— Communicating that approval and acceptance are based on performance and position within the organization

— Burdening the people with excessive demands supposedly given by God directly to the leaders

— Expecting members to make extreme sacrifices of money, time, and energy for the sake of the organization

But the Bible says, “Woe to those who make unjust laws, to those who issue oppressive decrees” (Isaiah 10:1).

I
SOLATING
19

— Defining relationships outside the congregation as negative and destructive

— Presenting the outside world as a place of egregious sin and temptation without any redeeming qualities

— Encouraging members to minimize or discontinue contact with family, friends, and the outside world

But the Bible says, “If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Timothy 5:8).

The Legalism of Spiritually Abusive Leaders

Legalism is basically an attitude in which God is seen as quick to judge. He is viewed as a stern taskmaster and a judgmental judge and arbiter of
punishment. With regard to legalism, the attitude toward oneself is a misplaced confidence that leads to frustration, failure, and self-condemnation. And the attitude toward others is prideful exclusivity that produces frustration, fear, and resentment in others.

In Philippians 3:6, the apostle Paul spoke of his former “legalistic righteousness” as “faultless” when he persecuted the early church and caused fear in believers.

“Saul began to destroy the church. Going from house to house,
he dragged off men and women and put them in prison”

(A
CTS
8:3).

 

As with all types of abuse, certain circumstances are more conducive than others for a spiritual wolf to take advantage of unsuspecting sheep. If you suspect spiritual abuse might be occurring, check to see whether the following traits apply to the specific spiritual leader in mind:


Authoritarian:
demanding unquestioned obedience


Controlling:
invading aspects of life better left to the individual


Performance driven:
emphasizing external rather than internal qualities


Hypocritical:
employing a veneer of spirituality to cover carnal motives


Rigid:
devising elaborate, extrabiblical guidelines for members to follow


Deceitful:
twisting the truth of the Word to fit certain opinions and desires

Remember these words from the book of wisdom:

“A simple man believes anything,
but a prudent man gives thought to his steps”

(P
ROVERBS
14:15).

The Hated “Heretic”: The John Huss Story

I’ve tried to imagine what it must have been like: A solitary stake in the ground…his hands tightly bound…his neck closely chained to the stake…a mixture of wood and hay stacked around him. When the religious leader signaled to light the fire, the kindling burst into flames.

So went another alleged heretic—destroyed, discarded, dead. And what was his horrible heresy, the high crime worthy of death?

Czech reformer John Huss preached against the moral depravity running rampant through the church hierarchy. He also exposed the corrupt relationship between the church leaders and political rulers, who cooperated to sell indulgences (which the church claimed could forgive sins) in order to amass wealth and finance crusades. Huss dared to challenge the church edict that called for executing anyone caught with a non-Latin Bible. He recognized Jesus Christ as his ultimate spiritual authority, not the pope.

Unscrupulous bishops used Romans 6:6 to persecute Huss—“that the body of sin might be done away with.” However, the point of this scripture was to promote not physical death, but rather the fact that as true Christians, we are dead to sin’s power—we don’t have to sin because we have a new life in Christ. Unfortunately, spiritual abusers are experts at twisting Scripture.

Huss suffered severe spiritual abuse through harsh imprisonment, malicious slander, and cruel intimidation as numerous attempts were made to force him to recant his “heretical” doctrines. His tormentors used many ugly illustrations to paint a portrait of Huss as a heretic: “a rotten piece of flesh, the little spark, which unless checked turns to a great flame and burns up the house, the creeping cancer, the scabby member of the flock.”
20

Before tying Huss to the stake, church bishops committed his soul to the devil and placed on his head a paper cap that stretched 18 inches high and portrayed three devils mutilating his soul with pitchforks. A single Latin word was etched on the humiliating headdress—a word that translates to
Heretic
.
21

Finally on July 6, 1415, as John Huss was being anchored to his execution station, wood and hay were piled all around him up to his chin. Even so, he was determined to make a final proclamation:
“In the same truth of the gospel which I have written, taught and preached…I am ready to die today.”
22
As the flames leaped upward and danced about his face, Huss began to sing a hymn.

The news of what had happened at the stake that fateful day spread like wildfire across Europe and further confirmed Huss’ place in history as a forerunner of the Protestant Reformation. Huss’ spiritual abusers could not stamp out the religious reforms that had already begun to blaze a trail toward new spiritual leadership and direction.

These religious leaders kept trying to set a devious trap for John Huss much like the Pharisees of Jesus’ day—the supposed good shepherds of God’s people who instead manipulated God’s Word to protect and promote their man-made traditions. Jesus’ stinging rebuke to the Pharisees in Matthew 15:6-9 is an indictment that describes perfectly the many religious leaders down through the centuries who have spiritually abused their flocks: “You nullify the word of God for the sake of your tradition. You hypocrites! Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you: ‘These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. They worship me in vain; their teachings are but rules taught by men.’ ”

Other books

Women on the Home Front by Annie Groves
The Cottage in the Woods by Katherine Coville
The Long Tail by Anderson, Chris
Anonyponymous by John Bemelmans Marciano
A Barlow Lens by Elizabeth Noble
Together Alone by Barbara Delinsky
Love Doesn't Work by Henning Koch