Falling (20 page)

“What’s with everyone today?” I laugh a little.

“Nothing.” Dana chuckles. “Still dazed. I must need more caffeine.”

The day continues on as usual. Dana and Justine greet everyone even though Justine still doesn’t look like she’s feeling all that great. And with two of them, it’s pretty easy for the girls to keep up with what they have to do.

The lunch crowd starts to file in, and I’m swamped in the kitchen. Justine picks up a newly finished pizza and starts to walk it out. She stops suddenly, drops the pizza on the counter and runs upstairs. What the…?

Dana steps in just as Justine disappears up the stairs and follows. I run the pizza out and go back to the kitchen to finish up the next set of lunch orders. It takes Dana almost
thirty minutes
to come back down.

“What’s going on? You two left me in the lurch down here.” I try not to sound too irritated.

“Your sister has some sort of stomach bug. Probably from the airplane or something. She’s heading to bed.”

Dana looks…weird.

“Don’t worry, though.” She suddenly smiles and things start to look normal again. “
I’m
fine.” She grabs a pitcher of coffee and a pitcher of water and walks out of the kitchen.

I feel like my brain isn’t hardwired right to get girls. Something’s off. Maybe nothing’s weird. Maybe it’s just two girls in here. I have no idea, but I do know that something isn’t right. Or, at least, I
think
something isn’t right. I decide that I already know I’m crap at deciphering what women want
,
so I go back to cooking and try to keep my brain there.

DANA

Way Too Much History

“I can’t believe you haven’t read Twilight.” Justine is open-mouthed at me over our bowls of cereal.

Justine is eating hers dry again. After the weekend crowd disappeared, she came out of hiding, but eventually she’s going to have to tell her brother why she’s here. He’ll figure it out soon enough if she keeps feeling as rotten as she is.

“It hasn’t really come up.” I shrug.

“Hasn’t really come up?” Justine laughs again. “But you’ve heard of it.”

“Anyone with a TV or a computer has to know what Twilight is.” I smirk. “Besides, I’ve been sleeping in your room. From the posters of the adolescent boys on your walls, I’d say I was Team Jacob.”

Jason chuckles, but keeps his eyes on his computer.

Her cereal spews over the table. “What?”

Justine stares. I laugh. Jason shakes his head.

“Oh,” Justine says. “You’re only saying that because you haven’t read them yet.”

“I don’t plan on reading them.” I take another sip of coffee, just waiting for her reaction. Two days and I love her to pieces already.

“Please?” Justine uses her best whiny voice. It’s the kind that takes practice.

Jason fails at holding in his smile, but his eyes are still very carefully trained on his screen. “Both Jason and Boz have read them and they’re no fun to talk to because all they do is complain about Bella. Pleeeaase?”

Jason laughs until I catch his eyes, then his face falls.

“Wow
,
Jason,” I tease finding this whole conversation suddenly hilarious. “You read Twilight.”

“Yes.” He glares at Justine, which is more adorable than angry.

“Jason read a teenage girl vampire book.” I just want to soak in this fabulous moment for a few minutes.

“Yes.” H
is
body slumps a little in defeat. He has to know I’m going to hold this over his head.

“Okay, Justine. If Boz and Jason can take it, I’m sure I can, too. I’m assuming you have them around here somewhere?” I take another sip, trying to pretend that this isn’t going to be a big deal. For Justine, I can read four stupid books.

Justine’s whole face lights up, and I start to understand why Jason can’t tell her no. “I’ll be right back!” She leaps out of her seat so fast she almost spills her remaining cereal on the table and runs up the stairs.

“Thanks.” Jason’s eyes are on mine in a way that quakes through me.

“For what?” I lean away slightly, suddenly needing more room to breathe.

“For reading the books that Justine obsesses over.”

“Well, if you can handle it, I’m sure I can
,
too.” I smirk again as I stand, but Jason takes my hand, and gives me the slightest tug until I sit next to him. He reaches his hand to the back of my neck and starts to bring us together.

I breathe in as we get closer together and the familiar smell and feel of him rocks my core.

“Jason…I…” There’s no way to say anything without sounding crazy. I’m half convinced that I
am
going crazy. “I’m confused about a lot right now.”

“But—”

“Sorry. I just…” My heart’s hammering at how close we are. How his hand feels on my neck. How he feels. How he smells. Everything. “Give me some thinking space?” I’m being pulled between liking him way more than I should, and hating how much I like him. I’m also being torn between Alaska and St. Louis, and the future I had, and the uncertain future I could have. I just don’t know at all what I want, and the last thing Jason needs is to be led down another path with a dead end.

Leann listened, but she can’t help me. Not with this.

Instead of at least sitting next to him, I grab all the dishes and do a quick wash in the sink. Jason sits still for a moment, and we’re very thankfully interrupted by Justine as she tromps back down the stairs—her four Twilight books with their tattered edges in hand.

She holds them out toward me as I dry my hands. “So, this is the first one and…”

“I’m sure I can figure it out.” I take the stack of books from her and set them on the counter. I want to check in with Leann, and see if Keith’s made any more ridiculous demands about how I need to
keep
him informed.

Justine gasps just a little as I pick up my computer, and I realize she really is desperate for me to read these books.

“I’ll get to it, I promise.” I sit on the edge of a couch and pull my laptop up. “Just have a few things to finish first.”

Justine nods once, and I think we’re good.

JASON

I Really Should Know Not to Try and Make Sense of This.

As I’m writing at one of the dining tables, I suddenly realize the girls are whispering in the living room area. This can’t be good. I strain to hear, but I know if I make a move they’ll stop talking.

“Yes, that’s where I was before, but it doesn’t matter,” Dana whispers.

“What if I want my room back?” Justine whispers back.

“Really?” Dana sounds unsure. Maybe she’s unsure about where Justine wants to be or maybe she’s unsure about coming back to my room. I don’t know and the chances of me finding out are slim.

“Jason is making me sleep on his couch.”

Shit.

“What?” Dana looks over her shoulder at me and frowns. I try to look like I’m concentrating. When she turns back, they hover in closer, not knowing I can still hear everything they say.

“It’s totally fine,” Justine says. “And anyway, I miss my room.”

“Fine,” Dana says. “But you’re the one telling your brother that we’re swapping sleeping arrangements, and I don’t care either way. It doesn’t matter.” I’m not convinced that it doesn’t matter to Dana. I try hard to look like I’m still concentrating and not smiling, thinking about what I might be up to tonight.

“Okay.” I don’t have to see Justine to know the smug look she has on her face. For some reason this is exactly what Justine wants. I smile openly then. Having Justine get her way is almost as scary as when it happens to Dana.

I finish making a huge veggie pizza for lunch—girls’ request. We still have loads of food from our last Costco run. When lunch is over I do dishes, Justine heads to my apartment, and Dana picks up Twilight. She’s still wearing her glasses and her sweats are barely high enough to cover her panties. I stare at her back as she walks into the living room and flops into one of the ugly couches. They may be hideous, but they’re just so damn comfortable. I can’t imagine spending all the time required to break in a new set. I sit back down at my computer and resist the urge to sit close to Dana.

After a while Justine appears with her suitcase, it rolls loudly through the still room and clunks on the stairs as she walks up. “I miss my room.” She says as soon as she’s out of sight. “Dana said it’s fine.”

I look over at Dana and smile. I’m excited about our night.

She’s completely absorbed in Justine’s book.

So, I know Dana’s sleeping in my room tonight, but she’s not acting like the flirt I was sleeping with last week and, still, I have no idea what to expect. I feel like I’m in high school again, tiptoeing around, not knowing what to do…

An hour later Dana is still reading Twilight and Justine has taken over my computer.  This is boring and ridiculous. I take off for Boz’s place.

“Girls cramping your style?” Boz laughs as I come through the door.

“Dana has been sleeping in Justine’s room and Justine had been sleeping on my couch.” I rub my hands over my face a few times.

“Bummer.”

“I think it’s changed now. Today, I overheard part of the girls’ conversation—”

“No, no.” Boz shakes his head. We both sit at his small wooden table. “Never try to make sense of a conversation between girls.”

I stare. “Anyway, a few minutes later Justine marches upstairs with her suitcase. I have no idea if it was her idea or Dana’s idea…”

“Jason. Stop
,
man.” Boz is laughing at me. “You’re way over thinking. You’re a guy. If you get to have sex, great. If you don’t, that sucks, but as soon as you try to have more with that girl, you’re going to get crushed.”

“I think we’ve had this conversation before.” I run my hands through my hair a few times. I’m a mess.

“And we’ll keep having it until you get it.” He laughs a little.

I have to start thinking about something other than Dana. “How’s business?” I ask him. Boz’s marijuana seeds are becoming a bit of a fad. He makes more runs to the post office than anyone I know. I’m still waiting for one of the postal ladies to ask him why he has so many friends in Amsterdam, but they’re old and might not notice.

“Excellent.” He looks pleased. “I was in the middle of a Guy Ritchie film when you walked in.”

“I’ve seen them all. Let’s finish it off.” It’s the perfect thing to get my mind off whatever’s going on next door.

Boz opens his laptop back up. He has my TV for when he
really
wants to watch something.

“Want a light?” Boz asks. “I can roll one up for you.”

“Not tonight.” I shake my head. “Thanks.”

Boz hits play and the movie continues. Handsome Bob has just come out to his best friend, and we both laugh at the reaction. This is good. This is exactly what I need. Tough guys kickin’ ass and schemes and crazy twists. It’s the perfect thing to get my brain off of the situation at home.

The place is quiet when I open the door. Justine’s gone. Dana’s gone. I walk to my apartment to see Dana sitting in bed. She’s wearing a t-shirt and pajama pants, she has her hair up in a ponytail and her glasses on. I stand and watch her for a minute. I love her like this. Boz would smack me in the back of the head, again. I deserve it.

“Hey.” I smile.

She looks up at me and pulls her legs up closer to her body. “Hey.”

“I’m…” I have no idea what I’m going to say.

“I can’t.” She shakes her head. “I mean. Justine’s here and things are good.”

I don’t understand most of what she said. How did she know to say “I can’t” and what does Justine being here have to do with anything and what on earth does she mean by “things are good?” Shit. I can tell she still wants some space. It
’
s okay, I tell myself, I already knew this. I smile a little.

“And you have that very important book to read.” I can be friendly. I guess we’re friends now…who share a bed. But, judging by her cryptic few sentences, body language and presence of pajama pants versus panties—we’re just sharing somewhere to sleep. Nothing else. I’m once again annoyed at Justine, but I know I won’t stay mad. First off, I never do, and second, Dana’s back in her sweats. The real girl is here, and if friends are what we are, we’re okay.

Wait. That actually sucks. I can’t look at her without thinking about my hand on her, and now I’m going to be sleeping next to her, but not
with
her? This is crazy.

I find a plain white undershirt and after I strip to my boxers I grab a pair of pj pants. If this is how she wants us right now, I can do it. I’d rather be too careful than scare her away. So much for Boz’s words of wisdom. I’m all over the place.

“I’m a slow reader.” She smiles at me. I just stare.

It’s like I can’t touch this girl,
this
Dana. I know better.