In any ordinary life (In any oridnary Book 1) (26 page)

“I have…I have thought of nothing else…see you soon Sir.”

Unable to let go he rested his temple against hers and closed his eyes. Feeling her soft lips on his he couldn’t help but pull her close feeling overwhelmed by her touch. As he pushed his body against hers Jeanie hurried quickly out of his embrace and down the stair case.

  Hearing her footsteps disappear he sat next to the fire he running both hands through his hair. Picking up her empty glass he placed it back in the cabinet, “That fucking girl never changes.”

   Reaching home Jeanie knew the wheels had been set and all she needed to do was make them turn. Walking through the door Jeanie saw her family had gathered in the parlour. Wandering into the kitchen, Ivy ran in behind and slammed the door.

“What did you do Jeanie and don’t give me any crap you are up to something and I know this involved John.” Jeanie laughed under her breath and placed her coat on the back of the chair.

“You know I went for a drive today to clear my head because as you know my husbands missing in action and all you can do is question me about John. You’re not exactly being supportive Ivy are you?”

“I should have never fucking told you anything. You’ve always been a snivelling know it all half breed. You’ve told him haven’t you you’ve told him about Jayne cause that wasn’t your place Jeanie.” Irene over hearing the commotion had wandered in unable to understand both of her daughter’s outbursts. “What the hell is this about?” Jeanie filled the kettle with water and placed it on the stove, pinching her lip with her fingers, she answered her sister. “Yes I have told him, “

“Why Jeanie….why did you do that.”

“I needed an excuse to get him on side and Jayne had to be that excuse, he’s over the moon and wants to see his daughter, but I had to use her in order to gain his trust and win him around to the idea of me being enlisted.” Irene pulled the chair back and sat heavily down.

“You did what?”

“I know he’s alive, and they cannot confirm that he’s dead, so I’m going to find him as Private Jack Rutherford engineering division.” Ivy still in tears pulled on her sister’s arm, “How can you in your condition? How long have you told him?”

“Five months, I have five months to get into a good physical condition and my mind won’t be changed. I have seen death once and James brought me back so it’s my turn to do the same for him. None of you can speak a word of this. It could have John court marshalled and me sent to prison for a very long time. Do you understand?” The room rang with silence. The muffled sobs where stifled and Irene sat in complete bemusement at her daughters outburst.

   As Jeanie got up from her seat and began to walk past the crowd, Irene took her hand, “I know what it’s like to lose a husband and if there is a chance he’s alive and you can bring him home then do it and I will be behind you. I don’t want to lose a daughter but I will help you with what I can.” Patting her mum’s hand Jeanie forced deeply to hold back tears. The following months where going to be difficult enough mentally, but her body had already been so much.

Chapter 25

Private Jack Rutherford stood in basic training covered in mud, bruised and battered. Jeanie looked unrecognisable, no longer a woman but a young man on the verge of War.

   The mixture of British and US forces merged into the rainy background and as accents disappeared under cold breath Jeanie tried to take on the enormity of what she had gotten herself into.

   As much as Jeanie had tried to blend in she still stuck out like a sore thumb and with her talent of course being undeniably mistakable Mick noticed the new recruit as soon as he opened his mouth and he knew it was her.

“Boss you look like shit and this is fucking stupid if you ask me, “Mick stood in the rain watching Jeanie force herself on patrol.

“I don’t have a choice Mick, you know that.” Blood pored from her nose and pain gripped her rib cage and as much as she would have loved to quit and go home she couldn’t.

   Wiping the blood away as quickly as possible and trying to hide how desperate she had become she couldn’t help but feel helpless.

“I didn’t say that. Listen I watched some fucked up piece of shit nearly kill you and it’s something I haven’t been able to get over, how can I take that to war?”

  Jeanie wiped her face checking her nose again, she looked at his concern unable to sympathise as she had her end goal in mind and nothing and no one was ever going to change that.

“I don’t think our units will be together unless you know something I don’t?” Jeanie already had her suspicions and as he looked at the ground attempting to move away she grabbed his arm and pulled him backwards. “Mickey what have you said?”

“Nothing there where a few official looking gents so I talked in the right places just said you where a talented engineer and that our deployment into Burma could do with someone like you.” As he brushed her arm away he sat on the cold soggy embankment,

    Capturing a picture of herself in the puddle she sighed in disbelief at the pale distorted figure she had become and as the mud smeared her brow into her hair line she thought deep about Mick’s last statement.

“Why would you do that?”

“Because it’s the only way I can look after you.” Looking at her feet she knew this was the opportunity she needed to try to get James home.

“Well shake it then, I can’t exactly hug you here can I!” grasping her hand firmly he pulled her close and whispered lightly in her ear.

“I don’t think you should be thanking me cause this thing is still fucked up.” Jeanie smiled politely and as she dropped away she scanned the dark horizon.

   In the distance she observed the vehicle movements in the compound. She felt like a part of this landscape and one she fiercely wanted to protect. On the other hand her heart raced in her chest and the overwhelming urge to be sick took control.

   As she took on her watch the sudden realisation that this was really happening overwhelmed her senses. Throwing up at the side of the compound she tried to regain her composure. Jeanie felt the fear trickling inside her veins and taking over her senses.

   Being escorted back to her old haunt she felt numb as this was the place where her life had started to change forever. Signthorpe had wiped out any good memories she had in the garage and any good recollections had been tainted by his attack.

   Mick stood waiting in the workshop and as the introductions where made Private Jack Rutherford was dropped off at the garage. Mike had acted impeccably and he had played his part so well that even Jeanie believed they had only just met.

“Ok where do I start?” Mick closed the shutter doors and on walking back around slowly, he grabbed hold of Jeanie in his arms and held her tight.

“What are you doing?”

“This is more dangerous than what you realise Jeanie and if I’m ever going to feel comfortable…”

“I appreciate that you care Mike, but you have to promise me. You have to promise me that you’re not going to put yourself in danger or do any heroics because of me. You have to look after yourself and I have to do the same.”

“What if I can’t Jeanie? What if I can’t put you in danger?” Jeanie placed her hand on his shoulder and turned him to face her.

“That’s not an option and if it makes you feel that bad then I need to go to another unit. Mike I can look after myself. I’ve been through enough. I need you to trust me. I also need you to promise me that this conversation is never going to happen again…..” Lifting his head Mike’s gaze had turned into a stern glance, “Then I will have to promise.”

   Turning around he walked away and disappeared into the back ground. Jeanie bent her head and pulled at the short tuffs of hair, she knew if anyone found out the situation would get immensely difficult. Not being able to keep it from Mickey had never made it any easier.

   Walking into the office all her things where still neatly laid out as if she had never been away. Her diary and wall chart had been updated and the wood burner had been cleaned and polished in expectancy of her return. The comprehension that Mick had kept everything exactly the same sent shockwaves of guilt racing around her mind.

“Everything ok boss lady?”

“Thank you. But I need you to know that I’m going to war for one purpose and that is to find James.”

Placing her hands around his face she smiled, “Come on regardless we have a job to do.”

   Organising the numerous bits and pieces Jeanie instantly felt at home and the comfort and smell of the garage made her realise how much she had missed being a part of place.

    As the day drew to a close Mick disappeared looking back Jeanie raised her hand as she always had done. The garage held so many memories for both of them, some too painful to look back, some too painful to let go. Watching him walk away Jeanie caught her breath as this was all for James. No matter what she had to endeavour it would mean it was one step closer to his return.

    As the sounds echoed around the base Jeanie jumped falling back into character. She was a soldier and her freedom to come and go as she pleased was excessively restricted. The bellows of the sergeant could be heard ringing from the barracks. Grabbing her jacket she ran as quick as she could and as she slid through the door Jeanie lined up at the bottom of her bed hoping not to be noticed.

“You decided to join us have you Private.” Jeanie lowered her head awaiting the bleats, “Well for a little pretty boy like you, we have all the time in the fucking world for don’t we gents.

   Well you fucking little maggot, for holding me up I guess you will be up all night cleaning the shit houses won’t you,” Jeanie stood silent wanting to scream and as she held everything in the sergeant bellowed again, “Answer me puff won’t you!”

Jeanie screamed out with all the force she could, “Yes Sir.”

    It wasn’t hard to notice that Jeanie still looked somewhat feminine and it hadn’t gone unnoticed in the unit she had been assigned too. The rational explanation for the group of men together was that she was gay and a source of amusement. The abuse had started on her first day and whilst trying to ignore it the abuse had only become progressively worse.

    Starring at her feet Jeanie noticed blood had started to poor from her nose and was dripping onto the floor. Using the back of her hand she wiped away what she could and stood motionless her brow errantly fixed on her boots.

“Sergeant Can you tell me why one of your privates is bleeding?” Turning around quickly the sergeant stood to attention, “No Sir” Jeanie felt a hand on her face as she looked up she gritted her teeth together again.

“I will take charge of this dismiss them sergeant inspection is over, follow me Private quickly.” Jeanie jumped to attention and followed the Captain away from the barracks.

“Umm… you must be Private Rutherford. He said you’d be well…Lieutenant Colonel Stanton is looking for you and I really don’t appreciate being used as an errand boy so I suggested you hop to it lad. Also next time you bleed on my foot Private I will make you clean my boots for a year. Understand…get off to the infirmary.”

Captain Daniels spat the discontent at Jeanie as a cat spitting out a mouse, Jeanie sighed heavily, “How could this day get any better...”

   Standing in the rain the blood had gone from a trickle to a gush and as the rain washed the blood over her boots and she was on borrowed time. Weaving around the barracks blood still poured heavily from her nose and as she reached the infirmary she began to feel dizzy.

   As she swallowed deep the taste of tin engulfed the back of her throat and as Jeanie heaved the bile started to rise. Breathing deeply Jeanie could taste the ward as her nausea increased. Standing still in the corridor the lights buzzed over head and the ability to be rational was draining from her body. Frozen she heard a shout, “Good gracious what’s been happening to you.” Jeanie paused for breath.

“Just a nose bleed I think.” The sister dragged Jeanie by her arm led her into the examination room, Jeanie‘s legs felt weak and urge to sit rapidly took over her legs.

“Up, up up I will not have you messing up my clean chairs. Nurse bring some paper please.” Forcing tissue into Jeanie’s hand the sister left her stood pinching her nose and dabbing the blood away.

Great another feeling of being a leper
.

“What the fuck has happened to you now?” John raced into the room lifting up her head and checking her face.

“Nose bleed nothing more” John tried to close the door as the sister re-entered the room. “Are we having a conference he must not sit on the chairs,”

“Sister….please can I have a word, “ John closed the door behind them in the corridor and hearing the sisters clucking John entered the room clutching old newspapers, “Here sit on them I don’t think I could take anymore noise..” John closed the door and pulled up the chair.

   Jeanie’s eye’s where black and heavy and her smile had faded. The pale drained colour of her cheeks made John clench his fists wondering how far she was going to take this.

“Jea…….,”

“Don’t. Please it’s a nose bleed. We are all tired...”

“You know that’s not true I’ve heard they think you are ….I know they are giving you a hard time because of it….you’ve been on more patrol duties than anyone out of your watch and I can’t stand and see this happen anymore…..Jea you need out and I’m pulling the plug.” Squeezing John’s hand Jeanie looked into his eyes, “You know that’s not why you’re pulling the plug. There’s so much more to this John and you know it. You also know that I’m due to go to Burma in seventy two hours don’t ask how I know…I just do.” John stood up and drew his hands over his face cupping both of them over his mouth.

“I know you’re not stupid Jea…I’ve asked to be redeployed as well.” “John I’m going with Mick and his unit and they have already approached you. You have a job that needs to be done here and once I’m off the barracks that’s your job with me done and I won’t ask anymore of you….”

“Umm Mick.”

“What’s that supposed to mean? What are you not telling me?”

Racing over to the door John stood close to her side, “You don’t get it do you. You must really love him Jea but you just don’t understand.”

   In the rush John pressed himself into her trapping her between the door and the chair.

“I love you so much and we are both in to deep to back out of this and I know you can look after yourself but I can’t help it. I can’t help bearing that one day I’m going to loose you.”

  Kissing her passionately he ran out of the room and down the corridor.
He didn’t look back, he always looked back
.

   There was something he wasn’t saying and something she obviously needed to hear tugging at her hair she sat listening to the rain. The sounds of heavy droplets of the tin roof made her heart sink and John had pulled once again at her heart strings.

   James needed her and she had to repay him for saving her life. Walking out of the infirmary Jeanie saw John stood at the doorway to main building. He seemed lost, sallow and alone, but she knew regardless of John this was the right thing to do. The pressure she had put John under was immense and second thoughts had already crossed her mind but if she was ever going to see James again this was the only way.

   Standing tall John looked at the doorway and as she smiled politely and ventured out into the storm she couldn’t help but feel the weight of his stare.

   As he lit a cigarette John watched her every move whether it was her reasons or his reasons this fucked up situation was going to end when she disappeared. He was in deep and her family had more questions than answers he could give.

   Holding her head high, she was petrified, in fact she was more than petrified because she had to be brave and she had to show both of them she could do it and no amount of persuasion was going to stop her.

   John threw his cigarette into the drain and as he made his way back up to his office he couldn’t help but throw his hat and jacket at his secretary before slamming the door shut. Sitting at the large desk he watched the fire burn fiercely and he knew his reaction in the infirmary would have pricked Jeanie’s conscience. Something as happening he could feel the pulse of electricity in the air and hesitancy on her breath.

   Hearing a tap on the door Anne Croston his secretary walked gingerly over to him. “Sir I have to report that Mary Conaghan in our telegram office has not reported for work again.”