Friends With Extra Benefits (8 page)

"Wow," he exclaimed.

"What? Are the hairs dark, or not?"

Brian's expression went from one of admiration
to clinical concern. "You know, you are a lot hairier then when I
drew you that time in class."

She groaned. "I knew it."

"Are they dark hairs?"

He nodded. "They are, but you still look cute."
Brian felt blood heading south as his eyes glanced down to the pink
lips of her pussy. She was pulling her cheeks so far apart that her
hole was also pretty wide open. Inside, he spotted how absolutely
wet she was. His mind went quickly to Jillian. He wondered if she
was still sleeping and exactly how wet she was at that moment.

"But would you lick it?"

"What?" The question brought
him back to earth. "Are you
asking
me to lick it?"

She let go of her cheeks, stood, covered up
everything with the robe and turned to sit on the sofa. She gave
him a serious look but said in a tired voice, "Yeah, I want you to
lick my ass. Do you want to do it here or should we go to the
bedroom?"

"Sorry." He grinned.

"I meant if you were dating me and saw the
condition of it would you lick it or be horrified."

"Oh, I'd lick it."

She gave him a look like she didn't buy it.
"You're just saying that."

He nodded confidently with a completely straight
face. "I would be all over it. You wouldn't be able to keep my
tongue out of there."

She grinned and then began to chuckle. He lost
his serious expression and laughed along with her.

Victoria said, "Thanks, but I'm still going to
make an appointment. You want to go with me?"

Giving her a horrified look, he said, "No f'ing
way."

She widened her eyes. "Do you need me to check
your ass?"

He scoffed. "No, my ass is probably fine. I'm
taking care of everything myself. I'm having good luck with a razor
for the front parts and they might not be perfectly baby smooth or
anything, but I'm never letting wax touch my junk again."

She grinned. "That was a fun day."

Brian shook his head and opened his mouth to
comment but decided against it. "So, are you dating anyone?"

"Oh, God no. But there is this professor I keep
seeing around campus. I get so wet when I see him." She paused and
then added, "But then again, with the pregnancy, I'm always
wet."

He mumbled softly, "I know."

"What?"

"Oh, nothing."

Brian adjusted his shorts. Glancing down to his
problem area, Victoria grinned. "Why don't you run along and go see
your wife?"

He chucked and stood. "I think I will. I'll let
you get back to what you were doing, too."

Victoria gave him a sexy look. "Yeah, I am a
little stressed out."

She walked him to the door. As he was stepping
off the porch, she said, "Bye. Oh, and, uh, thanks for looking at
my ass."

He turned back, smiled for a moment then his
face contorted as he realized how strange that sounded. "Okay.
I'll, uh, see you."

"Remember Saturday."

Brian nodded, turned and took off running to see
his wife. Victoria watched him with a grin for a moment before
closing the door. She slipped off her robe, climbed back into bed
and then glanced down at her David replica. She reached for it,
smiled, and then decided to make a call first.

Jillian was awake, but still naked and lounging
in bed when the phone rang. "I'm glad you called. I decided against
having the party."

"What? Why?" Victoria shot back.

"I don't know. It just doesn't seem right. You
really think it's a good idea to march my new husband out with a
full erection in front of a group of our friends?"

Victoria cracked up. "I think it would be
hilarious."

"I don't know. I'm just—"

"Look, I need this. I've had one night of sex in
the last five months, and it lasted maybe twenty minutes. I haven't
even seen a real, actual penis in almost six weeks. I was doing the
math the other day. I have a lot of time on my hands... I don't
sleep much. In five months, there are two hundred sixteen thousand
minutes and in all that time I've only had a cock in my mouth for
about six minutes, and the remaining fourteen minutes it was in my,
you know..."

"Oh my, I, uh—" Jillian began.

"And not one minute in my ass. You know how much
I enjoy anal sex."

"I know. I know, but—"

"Do you know what percentage twenty minutes is
of two hundred thousand?"

"Uh, no. What is it?"

"Well, it's... it's... I don't know exactly, but
it's a really, really, really small percentage."

"I'm sure," Jillian replied hesitantly.

"I've never had such a low percentage of penis
time versus non-penis time since probably high school." Victoria
continued on with an edge to her voice. "My hormones are raging...
I'm constantly horny. I feel like fucking just about every guy I
see. Even the not-so-attractive ones. I literally have no
excitement in my life right now. I—"

"But how is doing this going to solve your
problem?"

"I don't know, but I put a lot of work into this
already. It took me hours to retype the instructions for the penis
kit. Not to mention all the planning and everything. Now, I've got
everything set for this Saturday. Everyone is invited, and Brian is
coming over at four. In fact, Brian was just here. We were going
over the details of the whole hot tub thing he's planning to pull
on you."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. He can't wait to get you back. He
was practically foaming at the mouth."

Jillian remained silent as she contemplated.
Victoria shook her head, then added, "Okay, fine. I guess I'll tell
him that your party is off. I'll make up some excuse. He'll
probably figure out some other way to get you back, so don't come
whining to me when he does, because I'm done. That's it. I keep
giving and giv—"

"Wait a second. Maybe we—"

"Just have him call me when he gets in."

"No, wait. Let's do it."

Victoria didn’t say a word as a grin spread
across her face.

Jillian repeated, "I'm serious. Let's do
it."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Don’t you dare pull out of this now."

"I won't."

"Great. I need to go and take care of something,
but I'll call you later to confirm all the details."

Jillian shook her head, suddenly regretting her
decision.

Victoria glanced down at her dildo, then
remembered, "Oh, by the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is coming
home to have sex with you."

"How do you know?"

"We were talking about sex, and his shorts
seemed to be a little crowded, if you know what I mean, when he
walked out of here. Actually, I think he was running."

Jillian heard the front door open. "There he is.
I'd better go."

She hung up the phone and grinned.

Jillian pushed the covers down to her thighs and
lay face down on the mattress with her legs spread wide. Brian
arrived at the bedroom door and stopped in his tracks when he saw
the sight of his gorgeous wife's breathtaking ass.

He softly said, "Jillian."

She didn't move and just wiggled her hips a bit
as she groaned as if in the midst of a spectacular sex dream.
Moving closer, he pulled off his shirt and whispered, "Jillian are
you awake?"

Jillian moaned softly and turned her head to the
side. Her eyes remained closed, and she breathed out deeply. He
grinned and slipped his shoes and the rest of his clothes off.

"Oh Brian," she cried out quietly. He moved
closer, and she finished that thought when she whispered, "... lick
my pussy."

He grinned. He didn't need to be asked twice.
After pulling the covers off her completely, he carefully climbed
over her so his penis was hanging down on her back. He studied her
beautiful parts for a moment before plunging his head down between
her legs.

She remained in her faux dream state for about
five minutes while he explored every inch of her pussy with his
tongue and fingers. After that, she pretended to awaken as she felt
his erection slipping down past her cheek. She took him into her
mouth, and they performed some acrobatic style sixty-nine for the
next ten minutes or so, which resulted in huge climaxes and stiff
necks for both.

Afterward, as they lay in bed together, she
nuzzled up on his chest. He stared at the ceiling while running his
fingers gently over her lower back. The guilt washed over him as he
replayed the conversation with Victoria in his mind.

Jillian placed a gentle kiss on his chest. "That
was amazing. I love you."

"I know," he replied in an irritated voice.
Realizing his inappropriate tone, he said softly, "I mean, I love
you too."

After taking a deep breath, he said, "There's
something I need to tell you."

Jillian stared up at him, waiting.

"You know how we planned to go to Victoria's on
your birthday, and I was going to give you that massage, and we
were going to get naked in the hot tub."

She sat up in bed and listened intently.
"Yeah."

He gave her a hesitant look. "Well..."

"What is it? What's on your mind?"

He grimaced and then stammered, "It... it was
all a trick to get you over there and get you back for the whole
policewoman thing."

Gazing up at her apprehensively, he waited,
dreading her response.

She painted on a surprised look. "Really?"

"Yes, I'm not proud of it. I was going to get
you to go back into the house, and it was going to be full of all
your friends. Victoria, of course, was going to help."

She glared at him in mock anger. "You're a very
bad boy."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"And what... the way I just took care of you
made you decide just now not to do it?"

"No, I decided last night."

"Really."

"Yeah, I already spoke to Victoria and called it
off."

"But she... Wait. I just talked to her on the
phone, and she said you were foaming at the mouth to do it. She
said it was still on."

Brian gave her an incredulous look. "She told
you about this? That little witch." Shaking his head, he stared
across the room. "I even looked at her asshole for her, and
she—"

"You looked at her ass?" Her eyes widened.

He replied casually, "Yeah, she just wanted me
to check how hairy she was getting."

Jillian nodded matter-of-factly and then looked
confused. "Wait... what?"

He ignored the question. "I wonder what the hell
she's planning. If she's lying about this, maybe she's trying to
get us both in some—"

After exhaling deeply, Jillian said, "I know
exactly what she's planning."

"You do. What is it?"

"I have a confession of my own." She gave him a
sorrowful look as she asked hesitantly, "So, how'd it go yesterday
when you, uh, tried to make that replica of your penis?"

Brian's face dropped. "She told you!"

Jillian nodded. "Did you hurt yourself?"

He scoffed. "Almost."

"She did something to your kit."

"Holy shit. Are you serious?" Brian asked as he
sat up on the edge of the mattress.

"Yes, she did. She changed the directions, or
something."

With the gears turning in his
brain, Brian's face morphed into one of realization. "She wants to
help me make this thing. I
knew
she was up to something."

"Did you really?"

"Well, no, but—" he admitted, feeling like a
giant idiot.

She paused a moment. "You know that policewoman
thing was ninety-nine percent her idea also."

"She told me it was mostly your idea."

Nodding, not at all surprised, she added
casually, "She lied. And I'll bet this hot tub thing was her
idea."

"It was!"

"She was going to parade you out in front of
everyone with an erection... somehow."

He shook his head and took a deep breath. "We're
a couple of morons, and she's this genius puppet master. We're just
pawns in her little evil game."

"She's a little bored. She's not getting
laid."

Brian narrowed his eyes. "I don't give a shit if
she's not getting any action. She shouldn't go around screwing with
people like this. She needs another freaking hobby."

Jillian nodded her head in agreement as they
stared at each other, both feeling stupid. As the anger boiled up
in Brian, she looked away, contemplating their options.

He said, "I'm going over there right now to give
her—"

"No."

"Why not?" He stared at her gape-mouthed.

Returning an evil grin, Jillian said, "Don't say
anything to her. She wants you over there on Saturday, right?"

"Yeah." He gave her a confused look.

"Here's what we’re going to do…"

Brian was all ears.

Over the next few days, Jillian and Brian spent
hours planning their mission, code-named Operation Erection Shield.
The name was Brian's idea; since the previous one was called
Erection Storm, it just made sense.

Jillian avoided seeing Victoria for the entire
week because she feared, in person, she would probably give
something away. She did, however, spend a lot of time on the phone
with the pregnant schemer as they plotted the events of Victoria's
original master plan.

That Friday afternoon in Philadelphia, Caroline
fidgeted in her seat, bored out of her mind as her professor droned
on about social media's impact on marketing in the Internet age.
Pulling her phone from her purse, she checked the time. Still
fifteen minutes to go. She scrolled through pictures and stopped on
an image of Jim, shirtless, playing tennis. She stared closely at
his firm, muscular, sweaty body as she ran her tongue around her
lips. The previous night, they were supposed to do it but didn't.
They ended up falling asleep instead, but now she wasn't tired, and
she wanted to do it. She really wanted to do it.