Beautiful Goodbye (13 page)

Leaning into
him, I wrapped my arms around his middle. "You hurt me bad tonight
but nothing hurt as bad as when you told me to get over being
raped. Don't you think I want to get over it, move on with my life?
I wish I could just wake up one day and never have another thought
about Jacob or what he did but that's never going to
happen."

Gage squeezed
me tighter and let out a deep breath before saying, "I know. I know
you’re trying to move on. Seeing you though and having to watch you
go through everything is hard for me. You're not the only one who's
hurting. I am crazy..."

There was a
sharp knock on the door before it flung open, and a very pissed off
Sadie came barreling through. She stopped when she saw Gage
standing with his arms around me. ”Why the hell are you here?"
Sadie sneered.

"Nice to see
you too, Sadie. Why are you here?" Gage quipped.

"Not that it’s
any of your damn business but I came to check on Jenna, after her
night with you and Larkin I knew she would need some girl time,”
Sadie retorted.

I held my hand
up to stop the two of them. "Can you two stop. I asked Sadie to
come over because I thought you left. I needed someone to talk
to."

"I'm not going
anywhere, babe. Ever.”

Sadie huffed
before holding up a bag and stated "I stopped and got Chunky Monkey
icecream, Reese cups and half a dozen chic flicks. We were going to
spend the night crying over movies and vegging out on
junk."

I stepped away
from Gage and pulled Sadie into a hug. "Thank you." I looked at
Gage and he smiled. "Sorry, girls night. See you in the
morning?"

Gage just
nodded then walked to his room.

Once Sadie and
I were in my room she turned to me and grabbed my shoulders, "Gage
is in love with you."

"Huh? You
stupid or something?" I asked through laughter.

Sadie just
slowly shook her head. "No. That's what his problem is. He can't
stand seeing you with Larkin, seeing Larkin have the one girl he
wants. I may have only known you for a few years but even I can see
how you feel about Larkin and how he feels about you. Gage isn't a
moron, he sees it too."

I stopped my
laughing and narrowed my eyes. "I love Larkin. Gage knows that. He
was the one who told me to trust Larkin. So why would he do that if
he's in love with me?"

Sadie shrugged
and said, "He was just being your best friend but I think once he
saw how much you really cared for Larkin he couldn't take it. He
knew he was losing you so he tried to push you away, only he was
the one who couldn't leave."

There was no
way Gage was in love with me, he was my best friend. Sadie had no
idea what she was talking about, but I didn't feel like arguing
with her, I've had enough of that tonight to last a lifetime.
"Maybe you're right."

"I am right.
Now let's load up on sugar and Channing Tatum."

CHAPTER 14

When Gage came
home from practice, he was hugging his hoodie close to his body.
Walking over to where I was sitting on the couch he stopped in
front of me with a huge grin.

"What the hell
are you doing? Are you so desperate you have to hug yourself?" I
asked.

Gage shook his
head and said, "Gotcha something."

Raising an
eyebrow I joked, "I bet. What is it? A puppy?" Gage knew I had
always wanted a puppy, but since my brother was allergic, I never
got one.

Gage smirked
before opening his hoodie. "Puppy meet Jenna, and Jenna meet your
new puppy."

Snuggled into
Gage was the cutest puppy I had ever seen. It was all black except
one foot and two spots above its eyes were brown. "Oh my God! Is it
a wiener dog?" I shrieked.

"Yes, I know
that's what you always wanted and I wanted to get you something
special."

Grabbing the
small puppy from Gage, I held her close to me before raining kisses
on her little head. "I think I will name her Dollie the
Doxie."

"Um, what
about Bruiser or Killer or even Chomper? Anything but
Dollie."

Without moving
my head, I looked up through my eyelashes at Gage and asked, "She's
mine right?" Gage nodded. "Ok then, her name is Dollie the Doxie
but we will call her Dollie for short.."

"Fucking hell,
babe. She's going to get made fun of at the dog park."

I laughed as
Gage rubbed his hand over Dollie's back, "I think she will be
fine."

**********

"You heard
anything from Larkin?" Libby questioned as she leaned forward and
grabbed a handful of popcorn.

I shook my
head. "Nope."

Megan put an
arm around my shoulder. "He's just being an ass. We all know how he
feels and how you feel. You two are perfect for each other and when
you two were happy so was everyone else but now that you’re not
with him you’re a damn Debbie Downer. Go talk to him and have mind
blowing make-up sex so your grumpy ass will be happy
again."

"You can't be
serious?" I asked.

Sadie snorted,
"Oh we couldn't be more serious about anything. These past few days
you have been Jenna from hell."

I let my
shoulders sag as I dropped my head. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be
such an ass to ya'll."

"So will you
talk to him?" Libby asked as she picked Dollie up, petting her
little body.

"What is there
to say Lib? Gage and Larkin are never going to like each other and
I will always be put in the middle, I can't take that. I don't want
to have to choose between my best friend and the guy I think I
love. I don't want to hurt either of them but what about me. Did
either of them stop the other night and think about how they were
hurting me? No!"

Sadie gave me
a small smile before stating, "But you forgave Gage." I didn't know
what to say so I shrugged my shoulders. "Jenna you have to follow
your heart sometimes and have a little faith that everything will
work out."

"I can't do
that, not after what I've been through." I mumbled barely above a
whisper.

"Huh?" Megan
asked.

I shook my
head and said, "Nothing. I guess I just need some time to
think."

We
all fell quiet and finished watching
Pretty Woman
. As soon as the movie was over, I fled the scene and
drove straight home.

Unlocking the
door, I noticed two water bottles on the kitchen bar, and Gage's
door was closed. I felt a little pang in my chest as I pictured
Gage and some girl in his room.

Trying not to
focus on his door I headed to my room, just before I got to my door
his door opened. I stopped dead in my tracks as Gage called out,
"Hey babe."

Not wanting to
turn around and see some girl wrapped around him, I forced a smile
on my face as I slowly turned. What I saw when I brought my eyes up
was not what I expected, Larkin was standing beside
Gage.

Drawing my
brows together and crossing my arms I asked, "Why are you
here?"

Gage stepped
forward and spoke, "I asked him to come over after practice, I
wanted to talk to him."

I pursed my
lips and questioned, "Why?"

Gage gave me a
knowing look before he spoke, "You two need to talk. I'm going to
hit the gym." Larkin and I stood there starring at each other as
Gage grabbed his gym bag and keys. "When I said y'all need to talk
I meant with words."

I jerked my
head in Gage's direction to glare at him. "I thought you were
leaving."

Gage smirked,
"Bye, babe." Then he was out the door.

I stayed glued
to my spot before I heard Dollie whining, turning to go into my
room to let her out Larkin's deep voice vibrated my body, "So
that's it? You’re not even going to talk to me? You’re just going
to walk away?"

Letting out a
sigh I rested my head on my door frame and bit out "I'm not walking
away Larkin. I'm going to let my dog out."

I heard Larkin
take a few steps and when he opened his mouth, I felt his breath on
my neck. “You have a dog?”

Fighting
myself, I only nodded before turning my doorknob and stepping away
from him. When Dollie heard the door open, she jumped up and ran in
little circles around her cage. “Hey, girl. Did you miss me today?”
Dollie just wagged her tail as I opened the front and reached in to
grab her.

“
When did you get her?” Larkin was leaning against my door
frame with his arms crossed, his t-shirt clinging to his tight
body. I’m not really sure how long I stared at his body, but when
he chuckled I knew it was too long and he caught me, damn him! “Are
you going to answer me or just stare at me like I’m
dessert?”

“
Whatever,” I scoffed and opened my patio door. Sitting Dollie
down on the grass, I made sure to keep my back to Larkin. I needed
to clear all my thoughts of him. After standing outside with
Dollie, I brought her back in and sat her on my bed and commanded,
“Stay, Dollie.”

Without
looking at him I asked, “Larkin, why are you here?”

“
For you,” Larkin stated plainly.

I jerked my
head toward him and said, “Larkin, don’t. Being with you is a
disaster waiting to happen.”

Larkin slammed
his fist down on my dresser. “Dammit, Jenna. Don’t do this to us,
at least give us a chance before you fucking give up. I’m standing
here fighting for you, something my ass has never done. I have
never fucking tried so damn hard to win a girls heart but I’m
trying so damn hard with you. You just keep pushing me away and I
can’t take it.”

Shaking my
head, I collapsed onto my bed and muttered “Larkin, you don’t want
to fight for me.”

“
Why don’t you let me decide what I fucking want,
Jenna?”

Covering my
face with my arm I groaned, “Just stop. Walk away.”

I felt my bed
dip then Larkin’s hand was rubbing my cheek. “I’m not walking away,
Jenna. I’m staying right here until you listen to me.”

I rubbed my
eyes hard before opening them to look into the intense brown of
Larkin’s. “Fine, go for it. I’m listening.”

“
Don’t be a smartass.”

“
I’m not. I’m giving you what you want so talk.”

Larkin laid
down beside me, using one hand to rub my arm and said “Jenna I want
you, like I have never wanted anything else. I know with you comes
Gage, which is something I will have to get over. I know how much
he means to you. I talked to him tonight and we are going to work
on our shit, we both want you happy. I am going home Saturday after
the game and I really want you to come with me. Maybe if we get
away from everyone and their opinions we can focus on each
other.”

What the hell?
He was asking me to go away with him, to his hometown? I rolled my
head so I was facing him to ask, “You want me to go to your
hometown with you? And what, meet your family? We’re not together
Larkin.”

“
Yes I want to take you home. I have told my mom all about you
and she really wants to meet you, even if we go as just friends. I
want you as more than just my friend but I’m at your mercy, Jenna.
You have me completely.”

Should I go?
Probably not. Should I put myself in that awkward position? Hell
no. Could I handle being with Larkin and not being able to touch
him? That’s a big fat no. But, I found myself nodding my head, “Ok,
when do we leave?” Seeing Larkin’s dark brown eyes relax made my
heart rate pick up and hearing him let out a sigh of relief had a
small smile playing on my lips.

“
I
want to leave as soon as we can after the game on Saturday. It
takes about two hours to get home so we should be there early
evening.”

“
Where is home?”

Larkin smiled,
“Goshen, Ohio. A small ass town but I love it.”

Biting my lip
I nodded before asking, “What should I pack for?”

Larkin smirked
and I saw a twinkle in his eyes before he answered, “Dinner with my
family, nothing special and maybe a night out. But where I’m from,
they are jeans and t shirts kinda people.”

“
I
can handle that.”

Larkin leaned
over and pressed his lips to my temple, letting them sit there
until Dollie started whining. “Thank you for doing
this.”

I smiled
before getting up and taking Dollie back outside. When I came back
in I saw Larkin lying on his stomach with a soft snore escaping his
mouth. His shirt had ridden up, and I could see the muscles in his
back flexing every time he breathed. I put Dollie back into her
cage and walked into my bathroom. Washing my face and brushing my
teeth, the entire time my mind was on that sexy six foot four man
lying in my bed. I wasn’t sure I would be able to sleep with him
and not try something but there was no way I could walk out of my
room and sleep somewhere else knowing he was in my bed.

Changing into
my red and grey plaid sleep pants and a black ‘OSU’ fitted tee I
shut off the bathroom light and walked back to my bed. Stopping to
stare at Larkin before climbing in, this man was my poison and damn
if I couldn’t help but keep going back for more. I knew I was
walking down the path leading me straight to disaster, but
something in me kept telling my brain to shut up and follow my
heart.