Yolo (14 page)

SnowAngel:

I forgot to thank u both for the chocolates, u dear sweet dearies!

mad maddie:

yr welcome. it was Zoe's idea.

mad maddie:

Zo, u there?

SnowAngel:

she's prolly gone to bed.

mad maddie:

what the . . . ? it's seven thirty!

SnowAngel:

in California, ya show-off. in Zoe Land, as I understand it, bedtime is promptly at 10 pm so that she can get a full eight hours of sleep before waking up at 6:30.

mad maddie:

why the hell does she get up at 6:30?

SnowAngel:

so she can make it to her 8 am class

mad maddie:

why the hell does she need an hour and a half to get ready?

SnowAngel:

shower, shave, moisturize. blow-dry hair. pick cute outfit. put on makeup. it's all about good hygiene, Miz Mads.

mad maddie:

good hygiene is overrated.

mad maddie:

so is doing laundry. HATE doing laundry. had no idea how much till now.

SnowAngel:

I so hear you. there's a girl in my pledge class who mails her dirty laundry home and then her mom mails it back all fresh and clean.

mad maddie:

that is ridiculous

mad maddie:

is that girl you?

SnowAngel:

ha ha, vair funny

mad maddie:

one moment, plz. must curse at the change machine for once again failing to accept my dollar bill.

SnowAngel:

hey, do u have a special laundry bag for yr intimates?

mad maddie:

hubba-wha?

SnowAngel:

yr lingerie, silly

mad maddie:

ohhhhh. you mean my thong made of pearls and my nipple-baring bra.

SnowAngel:

*eyes widen to saucers*

SnowAngel:

Maddie! I will be SO IMPRESSED if you really own those things. do you?

mad maddie:

no, fool

SnowAngel:

I think you shld invest in both. I truly do.

mad maddie:

and I will definitely positively absolutely keep that in mind.

mad maddie:

but only if the nipple-baring bra has cute straps

SnowAngel:

boom! YES!

zoegirl:

bork?

SnowAngel:

Lucy stole my chocolates!

zoegirl:

the ones we sent you? no way.

zoegirl:

she didn't really, did she?

SnowAngel:

uh, yes, cuz she is evil and shld be sent to Urinetown. also this time I had a witness. his name is Reid, and
he's an ubergeek—”Doctor Who” shirts, carries miniature U.S. Constitution in his backpack (!!!), etc.—and he's my personal sherpa cuz of my crutches and all.

zoegirl:

your “sherpa”?

SnowAngel:

yup. he's in my geology class and he saw me struggling with my stuff, and also my cute jacket with Buddha on it was tied around my waist but kept falling off, and so he jumped up and helped me. and he's been helping ever since!

SnowAngel:

he keeps telling me he doesn't have to.

SnowAngel:

*I* keep telling him he doesn't have to! ack!

SnowAngel:

but he insists. so what am I supposed to do? I mean, it's not like I have a golf cart, right?

zoegirl:

?????

SnowAngel:

or a Segway. THAT WLD BE SO AWESOME IF I HAD A SEGWAY!

SnowAngel:

oh! did you know that science classes have labs yr supposed to go to? and, like, your lab grade is factored into your overall grade?

SnowAngel:

geology, you so crazy!

zoegirl:

Angela, *you* are so crazy. are you on drugs?

SnowAngel:

pain meds, baby. nom nom nom.

zoegirl:

well, they're making you act weird

SnowAngel:

well, my FOOT still hurts, so be nice.

SnowAngel:

I can't remember if I took one or two, altho yr allowed to take two, don't worry. so I took another and now my thumbs are frickin HUGE.

SnowAngel:

wait

SnowAngel:

sending pic

SnowAngel:

aren't they HUGE?

zoegirl:

you put your finger over the lens.

SnowAngel:

I did?

SnowAngel:

WHOA MY FINGER IS HUGE TOO!

zoegirl:

and if you haven't been going to your geology lab, then you need to go talk to your professor.

SnowAngel:

that's what Reid said! you and Reid are let's-say-the-same-thing twins!

zoegirl:

Reid, your sherpa? is that who we're talking about?

SnowAngel:

he is so dorky *giggle giggle*

SnowAngel:

he uses words like igneous and sedi-something-ary. he uses no hair product, he's never heard of J Brand *or* rag & bone, and he's actually been to UGA's library. like, more than once.

zoegirl:

I go to Kenyon's library all the time. Holly and I go there to study.

zoegirl:

Holly also randomly reshelves books. she finds it amusing.

SnowAngel:

one of my labia is significantly bigger than the other. SIGNIFICANTLY.

zoegirl:

WHAT?

SnowAngel:

I happened to notice and I thought I wld share. is there a problem?

zoegirl:

is anyone with you right now? like, watching after you?

SnowAngel:

I didn't notice just NOW, you perv. I noticed when I was shaving.

zoegirl:

seriously. you're not in your room alone, are you?

SnowAngel:

omg, you are so random!

SnowAngel:

REID IS HERE. he walked me to my dorm room after class, as I said, and as I also said, Reid is an ubergeek, so I had to hold my chin high and tell myself not to care what anyone thought.

zoegirl:

put Reid on the phone, please.

SnowAngel:

and when we got here, guess what? guess who was on *my* side of the room? YUP, IT WAS LUCY, which is how I know she stole my chocolates.

zoegirl:

yeah, because that's a totally logical assumption to make.

zoegirl:

but I'm not worried about your chocolates. I'm worried about you.

SnowAngel:

why???

SnowAngel:

and maybe I wld go to UGA's library—maybe—if the librarians wld change the no-phone rule. “cell-free zone”? who comes up with such nonsense?

zoegirl:

Angela? you need to lie down. you need to lie down and drink water.

SnowAngel:

whoa. I am suddenly very dizzy.

SnowAngel:

I need to lie down.

zoegirl:

do—and tell Reid to take care of you!

zoegirl:

because I am. she parties all the time, she drinks too much, and she kisses boys whose names she doesn't even know. now she's abusing her Vicodin prescription, and not to sound melodramatic, but what if something bad happens?

mad maddie:

something more than poking a hole in her foot?

zoegirl:

out of all the kids we went to high school with, I didn't think Angela would be the biggest partier once we were in college.

mad maddie:

she's not. I saw on Susie Smith's FB page that Jana got so drunk that she had to have her stomach pumped. she had to be taken to the ER.

zoegirl:

see? and what if that happened to Angela? so scary!

mad maddie:

well, but Jana was always off the deep end. it's not like this is something new.

zoegirl:

will you talk to Angela? she would listen to you
more than she would to me, because she already thinks I'm a goody-goody.

mad maddie:

u *are* a goody-goody.

mad maddie:

also yr prolly overreacting, cuz college is just . . . college. it's its own bizarre world.

zoegirl:

it's not supposed to be a stomach-pumping world, though

mad maddie:

ok, I'll grant you that. but Angela didn't have to have her stomach pumped, did she?

mad maddie:

and to put things in perspective, let me tell you about MY life. this morning I woke up to see Zara's friend Neesa lying buck naked on Zara's bed.

zoegirl:

what?

mad maddie:

buck naked! ON TOP OF THE COVERS!

zoegirl:

ew! was she ok?

mad maddie:

she was fine. she just sleeps in the buff. says it's the Cali way.

zoegirl:

ew again. does Zara sleep naked?

mad maddie:

no. t-shirt and boxers, praise the lord. (god, California is messing with my head!)

zoegirl:

why was Neesa in Zara's bed instead of Zara?

mad maddie:

girl, there's a relentless rotation of ppl in our room, except for me. I stay put.

zoegirl:

huh

zoegirl:

I'm trying to figure out how I feel about this.

mad maddie:

I am too. constantly.

zoegirl:

was she drunk?

mad maddie:

when she crashed? dunno.

zoegirl:

and she wasn't under the covers even a little bit? even just, like, part of the sheet?

mad maddie:

nope, and when she woke up this morning, she just stretched her arms wide and yawned. no shyness or embarrassment or anything.

mad maddie:

one part of me says, hell, it's her choice, and
there's nothing WRONG with nakedness. theoretically.

mad maddie:

another part of me says that I didn't really want to see that.

zoegirl:

I wldn't either. sorry you had to deal with that, Mads.

mad maddie:

as am I.

mad maddie:

and I'll talk to Angela, sure. but as she has yet to show up naked on someone's bed, I'm not going to worry about her too much. she'll be ok.