Threesomes: For Couples Who Want to Know More (13 page)

This can happen anywhere: parties, bars, concerts, cafes, or even through a coworker; though I always try to avoid any sexual experience with a person or people whom I have to be professional with on an ongoing basis.

It could happen at the gym with a couple who work out together and make small talk with you. They could be watching you on the Stairmaster, enjoying the sight of your tight ass bouncing up and down. Enjoy the thought of a couple talking about you, how nice you are, how cool you seem, what a pretty face you have, and how they’d like to lick you all over. Couples who are close have talks about this at home, and they may talk about you so much they could be plotting a joint seduction. It’s a very arousing thought, isn’t it? A man and a woman wanting to share and enjoy you while you enjoy both of them. Here’s what to look for.

When you get to your late twenties or so, a lot of the parties you are invited to tend to be dinner parties. And, if single, you may be one of the few people who arrives alone. Don’t see this as a downer, but rather as a great opportunity. You could be seated next to a couple who are feeling frisky and having a good time socializing with you.

Notice their body language with each other. Many times, a physically demonstrative couple gives you and others a show not to be insensitive but to actually entice you and draw you in. See how they react if you do sit closer. More often than not, this will make the couple touch and nuzzle each other more, reacting to your smile and admiration for their looks and extroverted behavior. Talk to them about things you all might like: movies, music, books, even politics if the three of you are like-minded. The great thing about hanging out with a couple is that the conversation can be very intellectual and stimulating, even if you’re debating an issue. You and the girlfriend/wife may agree on something that the boyfriend/husband doesn’t, and you will bond over that and good-naturedly make fun of him for his opposing view.

Talk about the things they enjoy doing together, like travel, dining, or sports. When a couple has been together awhile, sensuality encompasses things like food and snow boarding. When they see you have some of the same interests or the same tastes, they will begin to enjoy your company a lot and flirt with you. This is especially true if you’re able to make fun of yourself when you mention things like bad dates or how you fell on your ass a million times when you were learning how to ski.

Let them tell the story of how they met and how long they’ve been together. When you see the girlfriend take a shine to you, admiring your humor, your taste, or the kind of shampoo you use, take that as a sign, especially if they’ve stayed with you awhile and haven’t mixed too much with their friends.

When you’re with a couple, it’s always best to take the cues from the woman so you know she’s into it and not being pushed into anything by a sleazy, philandering mate. You’ve got to find both of them equally attractive, even if you’re much more into men than women. You can be completely heterosexual with some bi-curious leaning and make this work, but by no means take this as an opportunity to screw around with a married or taken man under the guise of having his woman’s permission. That’s the formula for high drama and disaster, and you’ll be left with nothing but the feeling that you’re a deceitful home wrecker.

As they make mention that you are a beautiful woman, let them know they are a very attractive couple. Center your flirtation on that more than doling out compliments and flirtation to each individual. “You’re as handsome as she is beautiful,” is acceptable to say to the male counterpart, but nothing more than that. Say to him, “You’re a lucky man to have met such a beautiful, cool person. That’s hard to come by.” This way you diffuse any worry from her mind, and she will see you are indirectly flirting with her.

When you notice both of them sitting close to you for awhile, take it as a sign, even if they’re holding hands. Let them buy you drinks and take care of you. Accept their compliments and return some as well, and again, remember to address them as one entity.

The woman might want to bond with you by taking your hand to go to the bathroom, by stroking your hair, by feeling the fabric of your dress, or by going to the jukebox to pick out music you both like. Let that happen too, because it’s the woman’s feelings you always have to look out for more. She’s probably bisexual, and picking up a woman together is her way of satisfying her Sapphic urges while staying faithful to her man.

Always assume with a couple that they have done this before and have their own thing going on. You, again, are their guest, their plaything, their treat, and although they should treat you with the utmost respect, you’re walking into a situation that they’ve already worked out on their own. So although their attention and this situation will be all about you and you being there, it’s first about them and how they do this for fun and frolic.

Don’t try to get in between them until they welcome you to. They’ve probably left their apartment feeling adventurous and wanting a sexy woman to enjoy and to enjoy them, so take the more subservient role and follow their lead.

Sharing drinks and food with a third party is a sensual thing. If you like the cherry in her drink, let her know so she can feed it to you. If they offer a taste of their dessert, definitely accept a mouthful of apple pie à la mode. Order an exotic drink and tell them they have to try it, too. This will help bond the three of you.

If you feel it’s time to change the locale from the party or the bar, tell them about a low-key place to dance and hang out, then dance with both of them. Do not necessarily station yourself in between them unless you are invited, but most definitely sit close to them. Let them know you are having a good time.

When they encourage you to talk and tell stories, they’re actually fishing to see whether you are an open-minded person, so pepper your talk with ever-so-subtle sexuality, or mention movies you’ve seen that you find sensual and have turned you on. If the woman in the couple mentions enjoying Angelina Jolie’s sex scenes in “Gia,” agree with her and add onto that. And as the conversation becomes more erotic, ask her if she’s ever been with a woman. If she asks you this question, then definitely see this as a roundabout question in relation to the two of them.

At some point in the evening, they both will be making excuses to touch you—patting your back while you’re laughing or their telling you how fit you look, squeezing your calf or touching your stomach to emphasize it. When you and the girlfriend go to the bar or the bathroom, see how she looks at you and touches you. If you’re touching up your face in the bathroom and she stands behind you fluffing your hair, you’re in.

Let her know that you’re happy to be there by reciprocating her actions and touches. Before you know it, you will get an invitation to come back to their place. When she takes a chance and leans in close to see your earrings or necklace, whisper something in her ear like, “You’re so sexy,” or be more mischievous and say, “Are you trying to seduce me and take me home with you?” When your eyes lock and you feel the heat, lean in to her and see whether she kisses you. Chances are she probably will, and more.

So you’re in and you want to be in. If you live alone, invite them over for drinks and such. This isn’t so much for safety, but they may feel more comfortable being the ones to leave and being in a space other than their home. But if they do invite you back to their place, by all means go. It will allow you to continue playing the role of their sexy guest, whom they wait on, and to leave when you want. So do whichever you feel more comfortable with and whatever jives with the couple. If the couple is experienced at these kinds of things, they may even have a hotel room in town all ready for your tawdry little fling.

I recommend leaving the moves to them. More often than not, there is probably a “no kissing my guy” rule, as this is most prevalent among couples. If they feel the need to tell you what the rules are, don’t take offense; it’s a preventive measure.

If they have a car and he’s driving, get in the backseat and invite her to join you back there. Start heating things up that way. He will be driving and glancing in the mirror to see what’s going on. Hold her hand, cuddle with her, tell her she smells good, and nuzzle into her neck for a nibble and make her giggle. Smile and say you’re excited, she’ll reciprocate with a kiss—a long, sensual one—and by the time you’re back at their place, things will have heated up nicely.

Once you’re at their place, be a good guest. If they want to give you the ten-cent tour that’s fine, it gives the whole thing a sense of normalcy. Compliment their taste in decorating and see where they want to direct you. Let them wait on you, serve you a drink, ask what kind of music you like, and so forth. Excuse yourself to the bathroom, even if you don’t have to go, so that you can collect yourself and allow them to get situated. When you return, they will be ready to spring into action.