The Dog Cancer Survival Guide (14 page)

Some guardians dealing with dog cancer find themselves feeling terribly sad, guilty or numb. Giving your dog a massage can reconnect you to your dog and your shared love. This can ease your emotional pain, and it is also good for your dog; massage is now incorporated as a regular part of cancer care in human cancer centers like New York’s Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center. (See
chapter 15
for more information.)

Giving your dog a massage is a lovely, gentle, healing exercise. It’s also a natural activity for dogs. Dogs living in packs care for each other by licking and massaging with their strong tongues. If your dog has ever licked you when you were sad or tired, you were receiving a “Message Massage” (I believe the message was “I love you”).

You can send that message back to your dog. The length of time and timing of your massage should hinge on your dog’s state of mind and being.

Here are some tips for giving your dog a loving Message Massage:

Start your massage when your dog is already relaxed, for example, sitting quietly or cuddling with you. If you start when the dog is playing, he may reject the massage (dogs don’t massage when they wrestle and play).

Start slowly and very gently. Dogs seem to prefer light to medium pressure, much like what they would receive from another dog’s tongue. If you think of your fingers and hands as tongues, it will help you to keep them soft and light. Use repetitive, circular movements, like you are slowly finger painting. Avoid pokey fingertips, knuckles or anything that has an edge.

Pay attention to your dog’s comfort as you massage. If her muscles grow heavy and soft under your hands, you are likely doing a great job. If she shifts, edges away, or stiffens, you are probably going too deep or working an area too hard. Dogs with cancer can be extremely sensitive. Back off and see if she relaxes. If she does, continue with the massage. If she stays stiff, let it go for another time and give her a few gentle pets, instead.

There are certain areas that dogs really like massaged. You can try:

• the muscles on the top of the neck,
  
• the muscles on the left and right side of the spine,
  
• the muscles on the left and right side of the skull,
  
• the shoulders,
  
• the thigh and hamstring muscles on the thighs, and
  
• the muscles on the front and back of the calf and forearm.
  

Keep your distance from cancer tumors themselves as you massage. Sessions can last as long as your dog can tolerate and enjoy the massage.

This is one of the best ways to counter your feelings of numbness, sadness and guilt. It also helps your dog, by reassuring him that his pack cares for him. You probably cannot give your dog too many Message Massages.

PLEDGE OF THANKS

Duration:
10+ minutes

Indication:
every feeling

Expressing gratitude can have profound positive effects. Studies have shown that expressing thanks on a daily basis makes us feel proud, hopeful, inspired, forgiving and excited. It directly increases our sense of satisfaction with life, makes us more optimistic and more likely to reach out for social support.

Our dogs pick up on our attitude and, the more positive we are, the better we can help our dogs. The Pledge of Thanks is very simple.

Set aside a time to be with your dog. Pick a quiet place where you can both be comfortable and feel safe.

Thank you dog for everything you can think of, big and small. Say “thank you for _______, and thank you for _______, and thank you for ______.” Thank her for playing with you, eating her food, sleeping next to you, and for the time when she growled at the guy who came in the back yard. Keep going until you cannot think of one more thing for which to give thanks.

Do it out loud, because speaking out loud can prompt our mind to remember things we wouldn’t if we are silent. While you speak, allow yourself to feel your gratitude. Tears are allowed – and smiles are, too. Don’t hold back.

When you run out of specifics, you might still be “on a roll of gratitude.” If this happens, you can say “thank you, thank you,” until your urge to speak slows and the words stop.

This exercise often reconnects guardians to a sense of unconditional love. Once you are finished, take a moment to enjoy the feeling of love you have unleashed. Enjoy your recognition of the gifts your dog has given.

I would allow at least ten minutes for this exercise and that may not be enough time. Many readers have written to say that this one exercise is the most important one in this book.

DYNAMIC DOG EXERCISE

Duration:
10+ minutes

Frequency:
daily

Indication:
every feeling

As anyone who has raised a puppy can attest, dogs naturally love to play and learn. However, a dog with cancer may feel slow and depressed. Gently stimulating her with daily challenges can shake her “back to life” and raise her self-esteem. It can also serve as a reminder to you of just how powerful your dog’s will to live can be.

Becoming excited or optimistic – about anything – directly improves your dog’s state of mind. You can see this, for example, when you offer your dog a treat she really loves, and her whole body responds with a wiggle.

Challenges do not have to be big. In order to get the blood pumping and the nervous system firing, they should be manageable and achievable. Pick one thing each day to change, just a little, for your dog. When the task is achieved, even a little, create a big, celebratory commotion with a huge amount of cheering and praise. This recognition is a key to building your dog’s innate strength.

Vary your walk route by a block or two, or go to a new place. Reward your dog with abundant praise for dealing with the new route.

Change the pace of the walk: slow it down, or speed it up a little. Praise your dog generously along the way.

Change your dog’s feeding schedule. Feed her a little earlier, or a little later in the day. Once again, praise your dog at mealtime.

Remember puppy school and do some basic training exercises like “sit,” “stay,” and “come.” When he does well, give him treats he’s never had before. Don’t forget to praise him extravagantly!

Teach your dog a new trick, giving lavish praise along the way.

A new toy can be very stimulating for a dog, even if she cannot take full advantage of it.

Go on short trips to new locations; give him lots of praise along the way.

If your dog is social, create new opportunities for her to interact with other dogs. Reward her for good behavior.

Introduce your dog to new people, and reward him for being nice.

Creating these rich life experiences boosts your dog’s self-esteem. In addition to the health benefits, these small challenges to your dog can remind you both that you are a team and you are the guardian your dog needs.

CHEAT DAY

Frequency
: every 5-7 days

Indication
: every feeling

When you and your dog are dealing with cancer, it can feel like never-ending work. There are vet appointments, new foods, supplement regi-mens and, sometimes, painful treatments. When you need a break, it’s time for a Cheat Day: time to spoil your dog.

I steal the term “cheat day” from a rigorous diet program my wife and I followed once. We ate according to strict rules ... but every once in a while we had a day where we could eat anything we wanted. These days helped us to stay motivated and to stick with the program the rest of the time.