Read The Dog Cancer Survival Guide Online
Authors: Susan Ettinger Demian Dressler
The following exercises dress most of the major emotions that guardians experience. Even if you feel the urge to skip this next section, my strong recommendation is that you read through all of the exercises and complete as many as apply to you right now. Later, if you need to, you may want to come back and use one of these exercises, exactly as you would an oxygen mask on an airplane. Three Deep Breaths is especially helpful and, best of all, quick.
Many of these directly involve your dog, so look forward to some good bonding time with him.
“I had forgotten how important it was for my dog to enjoy being a dog... not being a sick dog. The few minutes of one-on-one play meant so much to each of us. When I became quiet and focused on him without distractions, our relationship deepened exponentially. Talking with him, feeling my love for him and his back to me at such a wonderful level, gave us a wonderfully expanded relationship. We knew that no matter what happened in the future, we were so much closer than we’d ever been before.”
– Susan Harper, High Wycombe, England
“The prognosis was devastating to me and left me with an overwhelming feeling of helplessness. By using the emotional management exercises I changed from a focus on the bad to addressing my depression. She didn’t know “what” was wrong so by me being able to remain positive, in return it let her remain happy. It was a bond that I may have needed more than she, but I’m sure it helped both of us in regards to a feeling of love and the ability to keep living to the best of our abilities.”
–
Julian Trevino, Roseville, Michigan
THREE DEEP BREATHS
Duration
: 2 minutes
Indication
: any negative emotion
Studies have shown that breathing exercises like this one make you more focused, calmer and better able to handle new situations. Errors in thinking drop off, learning is enhanced and attention bandwidth is expanded to deal with critical information.
To illustrate just how quickly attention to the breath can make a difference, let’s take two minutes right now.
Check a clock and notice what time it is.
Turn your attention to your body and see where you find discomfort. Maybe you have an ache in your heel, a slight headache or your wrist hurts. It doesn’t matter how uncomfortable it is, or where it is. Don’t try to do anything to solve the discomfort – just notice it. It may be easier to close your eyes, so that you can focus on the physical sensations.
Rate the discomfort on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being slight discomfort and 10 being extreme discomfort. Remember this number (write it down if you need to).
Now, turn your attention to the sensation of your breath’s movement as you breathe in and out. You might feel it in your nose, mouth, throat, chest or belly. Close your eyes to help you focus there while you take three slow, deep, deliberate breaths. Let your lungs fill completely and then, breathe out completely. As you do this, pay attention to the physical sensations which the breath creates in your body.
Now, turn your attention back to the body part you noticed earlier. What do you sense there? Rate your discomfort on the same 1 to 10 scale. How does it compare to your first number?
Look back at the clock and notice how much time has passed.
The vast majority of guardians experience a decrease in their discomfort as a result of directing their attention to their breathing. For some, the discomfort disappears altogether.
In addition to relieving physical discomfort, this simple, two-minute exercise lowers stress levels, oxygenates your blood (and your brain), calms and relaxes you. By focusing on physical sensations, rather than emotional content or thinking, you are creating some distance between your emotions and your thoughts.
You are also cultivating your observational skills. Checking the clock before and after the exercise can affirm for you just how powerful your own breath is – and how quickly it can help you.
This exercise has a lot of impact. And if you do it again (feel free to repeat it right now), the effects add up. When you need quick relief, this is a good exercise to use. You can do it just before you go into the vet’s office, at night before you go to sleep, or in the shower. Use it as often as needed.
The greatest mistake in the treatment of diseases is that there are physicians for the body and physicians for the soul, although the two cannot be separated.”
–Plato
It’s been over two thousand years since Plato wrote those words, and they’re still true today. Matters of the soul are not generally addressed in conventional medicine ... and we’re slowly learning that we need to go beyond the “nuts and bolts” of anatomy. The body-mind connection is a focus of study in many different areas of medicine.
Paying attention to your dog’s body, while ignoring his emotions, is like putting gas in your car, but never changing the oil: eventually, the engine will seize up and stop running. You can also consider the exercises in this chapter part of Step Five of Full Spectrum cancer care (see
Chapter 15
).