Shattered

Shattered:

Broken Reflections of Love

Haven Anne Lennox

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictionally. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or to actual events or locales is entirely coincidental.

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2015 Haven Anne Lennox
All rights reserved. Including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof, in any form. No part of this text may be reproduced in any form without the express written permission of the author.

Version 2012.04.22

1

The bat connects to my ribs again.  I try to open my eyes, but it isn’t working for some reason. I’m on my side curled in on myself. I don’t understand why he gets like this.  All that exists is pain no matter how I lay. I feel his hand in my hair.  He pulls until I am on my feet, but he maintains his hold.  He has to, because my legs will not hold me up.   He keeps screaming at me to look at him, but I’m still trying to get my eyes open.  Can’t he see that?  If this is my end, I think to myself, then I want to be able to look into his eyes as the light fades from my own.  Finally, my right eye opens half way.  The pain is absolutely excruciating, but I need to see him.  My eyes do not betray me.  There he is—my husband, the father of my children, and the man I have loved for most of my life.  That wickedly handsome smile spreads across his face.  It was the smile I fell in love with, but the smile I love to hate now.  It is full of evil.  I know how much he enjoys seeing me bleed.  Knowing he caused the blood to spill from my wounds increases his satisfaction.  I know this for certain because he has told me so. 

I have stopped fighting back.  It only makes things worse. Hell, I have stopped fighting in all ways. I’m ready for it to be over, and I’m hoping this will be the last. His left hand still has a hand full of my hair. His right fist connects to the left side of my head. It didn’t have much power behind it.  Maybe he’s getting tired, I think.  

I drop to the floor in a crumpled heap of broken flesh and broken bones as he releases his handful of my hair.  If he walks away now, I have no idea what will happen next.   I can’t even move on my own.  He is standing over me and rolls me to my back. He puts one foot to the side of my face with so much power behind it, I feel my jaw dislocate. With his hands on his knees, he leans closer to my face. I can see my blood on his face and hands. It’s also all over his white t-shirt.  I know that will set him off even more so.   He leans in and I hear his raspy baritone whisper as he says, “I loved you once.  Now, you’re just a stupid whore.  You absolutely have ruined my life.”  Then, I hear footsteps and silence as he walks out of the apartment, leaving me to lay in a pool of my own blood. 

Time seems to dissolve into darkness for a while, it seems.  After what seems like eternity, I hear a lot of yelling.  My entire body clenches in fear. 
He’s back
, I think.  I try to move, but I can’t.  Then, I remember everything that happened. I don’t know what’s going on. I feel hands on me and a voice that sounds like someone I know. There are voices everywhere, but two stick out to me.
God, why can’t I place them
?

I feel someone take my left hand, and I hear myself scream. It’s a strange sensation—the act of screaming but not feeling yourself scream.  It’s like an out-of-body experience, yet remaining fully conscious and aware of one’s surroundings.  The voice says, “Goddammit, I’m killing the fucker as soon as I see him.”

I want to say no. I know what my story is. Whoever this is can’t go after Tyler. Tyler will kill them and then kill me. I try to get my eye open again, my mouth open—anything, but all I can feel is pain.

“No.” I say, hoping that they hear me. I know those voices. I just can’t place them. All I can think about the pain and the fact that I have to stop whoever is thinking of going after Tyler. I don’t care about my life, but I can’t have someone else hurt or die because they want to try and save me.

I fight through the pain and think to myself,
god it hurts so badly
. I finally get my eye open just a little, and I see my brother, Storm. He got that name in high school.  His real name is Tobias, but we all call him ‘Storm’. He knows I will stop at nothing to get him to leave this alone. Tyler is crazy.  He doesn’t care who you are or how big you are.  No one puts fear in Tyler--not even the law.

Storm has one of my hands. I’m still not sure who is there with him. Storm looks down at me, still cussing. “Rain, come on little sister.” I hear him say.  “Fight. I’m not letting you go. I’m going to kill that bastard. You’re not coming back here.”  He turned to the other voice that I couldn’t quite place and said, “Liam, call 911, and get me a fucking towel.”

Now I really wish I were dead.  I can’t believe it’s Liam.  I don’t want him to see me like this.  I try to will myself to speak.  I need Storm to get Liam out of here. 

Liam was Tyler’s best friend all through school. He hates Tyler now and doesn’t need anything to make him lose his shit on Tyler. I look up at Storm as best I can and say, “Storm, leave.” That’s all I can manage to get out. The pain I feel is unreal. Before Storm can say anything, Liam is back. My brother looks at him and shakes his head. When Storm looks back at me, what I see in his eyes scares me.  I know that look all too well.  It’s fear and anger combined. I know this will not end well. I have to try again. “Leave.” I say again.  Something shifts in Storm’s eyes.

“Leave, you want me to leave? Not fucking likely, little sister. I’m getting you to the hospital, and then, I’m going after that piece of shit husband of yours.  I’m going to rip his sorry ass apart. You’re crazier than I thought if you honestly think I’m going to leave you here like this.”  He turns to Liam and says, Liam, come over here and hold this at her side.  That sonofabitch knifed her!”

I don’t remember Tyler putting the knife to me. Liam’s face comes into my view. He is wearing the light blue shirt that I always thought complemented his features.  Over the years, Liam has become a great friend to me.

I hate to say this, because it only proves Tyler right—that I ruined his life—but Liam is who I should have ended up with.  He’s a great man.  Tyler said our first child was to be named after Liam, so we named our oldest child ‘Liam’; but that was a time long ago before things started happening.  That was before Tyler started hitting me and making me do things that no one should ever have to do against their will.

Liam holds my hand as well as the towel to try and stop whatever bleeding I have. There is so much I want to say to him, but I can’t bring myself to say the words.  I close my eyes to keep from looking at him. I think he knows my mind, because he says, “Rain, baby girl, look at me. Look in my eyes when I say this to you. I won’t allow this to happen to you again.”

I open my eye to look at him, and say, “Please, you have to leave.” I want to tell him something mean just to get him to go away, to go somewhere where he will be safe. Liam and Storm both need to leave. Tyler can’t find out. He will kill them. I know he will. Finally, the paramedics show up and move Liam out of the way. I get a mask put on my face--I guess to help with my breathing. I try to tell them to leave, too. If Tyler comes back and sees all this, we all might die. The only words I can get to escape my lips to anyone are “Leave.”

“Ma’am, it’s okay.  I’m here to help. Do you know what happened?” says the paramedic.

These are where the lies begin.  I realize that logically, I should go ahead and tell them everything.  I used to think that if I told, Tyler would never hurt me again, but I know this to be untrue.  He always finds me. 
Always.

Don’t ask me why I do it time and time again.  It’s normal to me now. “I fell down stairs.” I say to the paramedic.  I hope he understood me. I see him look over at Storm and Liam. They both shake their heads, but they can’t prove anything. I won’t let Tyler get to them. I’ll play my part and do like I always do. I’ll lie to keep his ass safe until he kills me, which I was hoping would be now. But, I guess, I was wrong. I know I’m about to pass out at this point.  The pain is way too much for me at this point, but I have to try again to get them all to leave before Tyler comes back.  Before I can really say anything intelligible, darkness takes me under and I slip into nothingness. 

2

I open my eyes and look around. I’m in the hospital. The plain walls the big open window, but what really gives it away is are the machines. I hate them.
They are always beeping giving away you’re the increase of your heart rate,
I think to myself.  I turn my head. I can feel someone in the room. I just don’t know who it is, yet. My eyes are still really swollen, but I can open both of them just enough to see things a little. There is a cop in plain clothes wearing tight Levis, a black muscle shirt with black combat boots.  He doesn’t look like any other undercover cop
I’ve
ever seen. To anyone else.  He would look like any guy on the street, but I know he is a cop by his commanding presence.  Some guys just give that vibe, you know? I also know that he is here to talk to me about what happened. I also know that he isn’t going to get what he wants from me. He wants me to give him Tyler, but I never will. I’m going to use Tyler to get what I want. Tyler is my means to an end.  I simply don’t feel that there is anything out there for me.  My world has been nothing more than Tyler or my children.  I’ve completely lost myself.

Storm is also standing in my room. I don’t know how long I have been out, but it has been long enough for Storm to change. I know Tyler hasn’t been here. He never shows. It doesn’t help my story, but it is what it is.

I can’t talk. I guess my jaw is wired shut. He didn’t break it--just dislocated it. My whole body hurts. I don’t have a chance to run a body check in my mind before my brother and ‘super bad’, as I call him, turn to see me awake.

“Rain, baby girl, you have no idea how good it is to see your eyes open? Do you need anything before we jump in to the hard shit?” Storm slides the paper toward my hand. I know the drill. This isn’t my first time at the rodeo. I grab the pen with my free hand. At least there is something on my body that doesn’t hurt. Storm holds the paper while I write.

        I need you to leave, I need you to stay away.

        I need you to make the cop go with you. I don’t want you here

      It’s not safe for you and you know it.

I can see Storm shaking his head already, and I’m not even done writing. So, I just stop and write in large letters:

LEAVE!

Storm is such an ass all he says in response is “I’ll get the nurse.  She can let the doctor know that you are awake.”

I write as fast as I can before he walks away:

               
 
And she can make you leave.

He just leans over, kisses my forehead, and walks out while smiling.
Stupid fucker
. I don’t have as much luck with the cop. I was hoping he would go with Storm, but nope, it didn’t happen.

“So, why isn’t it safe for Tobias to be here?” The cop asks me as he folded his hands across his massively taut chest.  If I weren’t in so much pain, or if I had any real feelings left, I might have found him incredibly sexy. 

             
 
You aren’t allowed to call him that!

I write hoping he can understand my handwriting. He looks at me like he knows something I don’t, but that’s his job--to freak me out so that he can get what he wants out of me. But this idiot doesn’t know that I have been playing this game so long, I’m a fucking MVP.

“Ok, he says.  “So, why isn’t it safe for Storm to be here?”  He leans against the wall as if he stepped out of an edition of GQ magazine.

       Don’t worry about that. Why don’t you just tell me what you want so I can tell you to fuck off?

This time, I get a full smile. “Your brother and Liam were right, you’re a straight shooter, I also bet they were right when they said you won’t give me what I want.”

Well, why don’t you stop wasting my time and tell me what it is you want. I’m sure you have better things to do today.

My hand is starting to hurt from the writing, so I lay the pen down and flex my fingers a little. While I wait for him to answer me, he just looks at me for the longest time. I know I said I wanted Storm to leave, but he should have taken this guy with him. He is just staring at me like he can see it all in my eyes. Though, I know he can’t.  No can see it all. I won’t allow it. I’ll never allow it.

What do you want detective? I would like to rest if that is ok with you. So could you please ask you pointless questions and go about your day, already?

I write as fast as I can. I really want this guy gone. Tyler never comes to the hospital while I’m here, but he is also full of surprises. He went farther this time than any other time, and we can’t have people asking more questions than they already do. Everyone knows that something is up, but they don’t know for sure.

He begins talking.  He’s still leaning against the wall. This guy is too relaxed. “Let’s start with names, shall we? I’m detective Felix Falls. I have been following Tyler Childs’ case for many years. Now, it’s your turn.  What’s your name?

  
 
You know my name.  Now, stop wasting my time, detective.

This dude is getting on my nerves.  My hand is hurting, and I’m running out of room on this small note pad.

“Ok Mrs. Childs, how did you end up beaten and bloody? Or maybe I can guess. If your files are anything to go by, you may have fell down the stairs or hit your face on the sink. Although, there was that one time when you fell down the hill, broke three ribs, your right arm, and busted up your face. It was hell of fall.”

I stare at him. I guess he has been following Tyler, but he will never use me to catch him. I pull the pad of paper closer to me and begin to write.

      I fell down the stairs.  What can I say? I’m clumsy. What are you hoping to get out of this?

I slide the paper over to him, lay my pen down, and look at him while he reads what I have written.

“Mrs. Childs, if you fell down the stairs, how did you make it back to the apartment where your brother and Liam found you? And as to what I hope to get out of this is your husband behind bars and you still living.”

I roll my eyes. Well at least I know I roll my eyes.  You can’t see much of my eyes as it is, but it just happens. 

I crawled to the top of the stairs, and got to the apartment. I was going to call Tyler to come get me, but I guess I blacked out. As far as what you want with Tyler, it will never happen, not with my help anyway. If you are doing this to help me, stop. I don’t want or need your help. I don’t need you trying to save me. Storm does that shit enough. So please go and find someone else to save, detective. Me, I fell down the stairs. End of story. Now if that is all, I would really like to get some rest. 

This guy stares so much. If I hadn’t of gone through this a hundred times, it would freak me out, but the fact of my life is it doesn’t bother me at all.

I think I have answered your questions detective. Have a great day.

He gets up from his leaning and walks to the foot of my bed placing his hands on the bottom and leans over slightly.  “I don’t want this to end badly for you, Mrs. Childs. Believe it or not, I’m trying to help you before he kills you. Would it surprise you to know that Tyler has two other kids with a woman by the name of Maggie Lynch that he hasn’t seen since he beat her ass two years ago? Would it surprise you that as soon as it happened, she left him? He went looking for her, but I was the one to hide her. She wouldn’t tell me what happen right off. No names. Nothing, but people around town knew she was seeing Tyler. People have seen them together. So, I put two and two together. I know that he is doing the same things to you. Since Maggie will not press charges, I can’t do anything for her case, because there is no case. But you, Rainy, you are the one I can still help. I can get you out, and I can keep you safe. I won’t let him hurt you anymore. Think of your brother, your parents, and think of your kids. Do you really want them to have to look over your body when Tyler is finished with you? I know you two go back a long way, and ya’ll have kids and all.  However, your life is worth more than this.”

You know nothing about me and who I am. I am not worth saving. You don’t have the right to bring up my family. My kids are safe, no one will fuck with Storm or my parents. You need to walk away from this. Now get out. Thank you so much for stopping by.

I drop the pen push the pad away and look out the window. I’m done with this, but I guess he isn’t.

“I’m going to leave my card in case you change your mind. If I find out that anyone saw or heard what went down, I will be back.”

I can tell by his face that he is telling the truth, but if anyone did see anything, they won’t say anything. Tyler has the whole apartment building on lock. Well besides Liam, but Liam didn’t see anything. He never has.  He has only ever seen the after just like everyone one else.

Good day detective, I can’t say it was nice to meet you, but thanks for stopping by.

What is with this dude and staring? That’s what he is doing once again. Then, he just turns on his heel and walks out. I exhale a deep breath. I got through that. Now, I just have to get over Storm and Liam’s freak out. When they learn that I once again covered for my husband, shit will hit the fan with them. Storm has tried everything he knows to get me to leave Tyler. He has taken pictures of Tyler and whatever whore he is with at the time. Storm has done it all besides having me kidnapped, but it’s not something I would put past him. I am almost asleep when the door slams open. I don’t react, which is slightly strange.  With Tyler’s temper, I’m always jumping at something.  Perhaps it’s because I’m at the hospital right now, and Tyler never comes here.  It’s probably just Storm and Liam pissed after talking to the detective. I think that until I feel the hands around my throat.