Lessons of the Past (13 page)

“He is,” I agreed, peaking at Javier. He had turned his attention away from me and was talking to Caroline. You could see that he loved her with all his heart. And when she gazed at him, it was if she believed he had hung the moon.

“Okay, so anyway, we started making out, and then the clothes came off, and we wound up having sex on the couch.”

“Wow. So, what does this mean?” I hoped this meant Lane was going to take a chance on her.

“Nothing.” She shook her head as tears filled her eyes. “After he fucked me one more time, he told me he had to go meet Amy.”

“Excuse me?” I placed my arms on the table and leaned in closer. “I can’t fucking believe him. I’m going to knock the shit out of him.”

“It’s okay.” She shook her head and a tear slid down her cheek. “I guess I’m only good enough to fuck, not date.”

I got up and rounded the booth. “That’s not true at all.” I wrapped my arms around her. “I promise. You’re amazing.”

“Thanks.”

“I mean it.” I seriously couldn’t believe Lane had done this. It was completely out of character for him. “You know what? You’re way too good for him.” And for the first time, I believed that. Lane had showed a side of himself I didn’t know or like.

“You’re right. I am too good for him.” She wiped the tears from her cheeks. “Maybe I’ll just go over there and get that hot professor’s number. I bet I could. Show Lane I can get a guy way better looking than him.”

I sucked in a small breath, but smiled. I knew she was only joking and I needed to make her feel better. Glancing in Javier’s direction, I said, “I bet you could.”

Javier arched an eyebrow at me, and I knew he was wondering what the hell was going on. I shook my head and rounded the booth back to my original seat. “Let’s finish this food, then we’ll go get ice cream.”

“Sounds perfect.”

We ate our food and chatted about things that didn’t involve Lane. I watched Javier take Caroline into the indoor play area after she had finished her food, and I inwardly smiled. Being a dad looked sexy on him.

My phone beeped from my purse and I took it out.

Javier: Is everything okay? You screamed and she cried.

“Is that the asshole?” Courtney questioned.

“Huh?”

“Lane. If that’s Lane, tell him to go fuck himself.”

I giggled. “No. It’s not him. It’s a guy from one of my classes.” A lie, but also the truth.

Me: Everything is fine. I just hate knowing my friend was used by some guy. You men are dickbags.

“A love interest?” she asked, her eyes large and eyebrows raised. “You spend way too much time by yourself in that apartment. You need to find someone.”

“Maybe,” I replied, wishing I could tell her about Javier. Not being able to share anything about my boyfriend with my best friend was starting to eat me up on the inside. A girl needs to share the good times and the bad.

“Yay! What does he look like? I bet he’s yummy.”

“Oh, he is definitely yummy,” I said, trying not to look at Javier. “He has the best body I’ve ever seen.”

“Where did you meet? Oh, wait, you already said class.”

“You ready for some ice cream?” I asked, noticing she was finished with her food and drink.

“Yes!”

We threw our trash away and I took one last look at Javier. He was watching Caroline climb the playset, but turned to give me a smile. He mouthed, “I love you,” and I smiled in return before lifting my hand in a small wave.

***

Before Courtney dropped me off an hour and a half later, we both indulged in banana splits from the local ice cream shop. I ate every last bite, and felt a little sick, but it was worth it. She had started to feel better and that’s what mattered.

I unlocked my apartment door, irritated with Lane, and came to an abrupt halt. Javier was sitting on my couch watching TV. “Hey…” I said, shocked at his presence. I had given him a key a few weeks earlier, but he hardly ever used it.

“Hi, babe,” he replied. “I hope you don’t mind that I made myself at home.”

“No. Not at all.” I set my purse and keys on the kitchen counter and a thought bubbled into my head. “Can you do me a favor?”

He pursed his lips. “Depends on what it is.”

“I need a ride to my friend’s apartment. I’d drive, but it’s still pouring out and I’m angry.” I gestured to my wet clothes.

“Didn’t your friend just drop you off?”

I sighed. “I have more than one friend. Will you take me or not?”

“Sure,” he agreed. “But you have to tell me what happened at McDonald’s earlier.”

I dropped onto the cushion beside him and lay my head on his shoulder. “You know my friend Lane?” He nodded. “Well, Courtney likes him. He slept with her today then left her for the girl he’s seeing. She feels very used.”

I felt Javier tense, then blow out a breath. “Babe…”

I knew what he was thinking, and I hated that I’d thought the same. “I know we are different.”

“I’d be with you in a second if I could.” He put his arms around me, holding me close.

I nodded. “Will it always be like this?”

He was silent for a moment. “Let’s not do this. We can’t let other people lead us into doubting each other.”

“Yeah,” I whispered. I’d be lying if I said his non-answer hadn’t hurt. I knew I deserved better than what he was offering, but I didn’t want to be without him. “Would you still give me that ride?”

“No. You can talk to him in the morning. Now is my time with you.” He turned and laid me down on the couch, causing me to squeal. “And I want to spend my time kissing you.”

He lowered his body to mine, bracing himself with one arm. I grabbed his face and brought it to my mine, kissing him fiercely. Javier might not have been completely mine, but I was going to take advantage of the piece that was.

The next morning, I skipped my run and headed to Lane’s apartment before he had a chance to leave for the day. He needed to be told off, and I was the best person for the job. I knew we could say anything we wanted to each other, and we’d still be best friends—a perk of having a guy best friend.

I rapped on his door and waited. A minute went by before Lane opened the door, zipping up his pants. He was shirtless, and I was positive I’d woke him up. “Morning, sunshine,” I drawled, pushing past him.

“What are you doing here…” he looked at the clock, “at seven in the morning?”

I shook the bag of donut holes in my hand. “I come baring treats.”

He grabbed the bag, pulled one out, and shoved it in his mouth. “Why?” I eyed him. “Oh, shit. She told you?”

“Lane William Adams! I am so pissed at you right now.”

“Why?” he asked, sinking down on the couch.

I sat down in the chair next to him and tossed the bag of donut holes on the table. “Why? Because you slept with our friend and then left her to go see the girl you are fucking…seeing? I don’t know.”

“Hmm, I don’t know why you come over here acting all high and mighty when you’re sleeping with a married man.”

I exhaled. Hard. “What?”

“Next time y’all fuck in an alley, make sure you aren’t followed,” he replied snidely.

“Lane…” I had no idea what to say.

“Yeah. Nothing to say now?”

Tears blurred my vision. “Why are you being so mean?” Lane had never talked to me like this before.

“Alex.” He sighed and kneeled beside me. “I’m not trying to be mean. Well, I kinda am. It pisses me off that you think you can come over here and yell at me when you’re sleeping with a married man. And, oh yeah, he’s also your professor.”

I wiped the tears from my cheeks. “It’s not as bad as you think. I promise. You know me.”

He gathered me close to him and kissed my hair. “I do. That’s why it shocked me so much. As someone who has recently been cheated on, it makes me kinda sick to think my best friend would do that to somebody else.”

“Lane,” I cried. “Don’t hate me. I know it looks bad, but it’s not.”

“Alex, I’ll never hate you. It’s just…unbelievable.”

“He doesn’t love her. She doesn’t love him. They both know it isn’t real,” I sputtered. I hated the fact that Lane would think less of me. “I promise. I’d never break up a marriage.”

“Okay.” He kissed my temple. “Okay. Settle down. I’m still right here.”

We sat in silence for a few minutes while I tried to calm down. Finally, I mumbled, “So…at lunch yesterday...?”

Lane lightly chuckled. “It was amusing to see your facial expressions when Amy was talking about him. That text you got was from him, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah.”

“Your face lit up in a way I had never seen before. He makes you happy, doesn’t he?”

“He does.” I pulled away from him and wiped the tears from my face. “It’s a complicated situation, but he makes me feel…alive.” Lane nodded, but didn’t say anything. “I’m sorry, Lane. You’re my best friend, but I couldn’t tell you this.”

“Yes, you could. You know I’d never say anything.” He sat back on the couch. “You knew I wouldn’t like it, and I’d tell you.”

“Don’t,” I warned. “Please.” I didn’t want to hear his disapproval anymore.

“Okay. But you know where I stand.” He reached for the bag and tossed another donut hole in his mouth. “Now. Let’s get this over with. You’re pissed at me for sleeping with Courtney.”

I sniffed and grabbed a donut. “Well, I came over here ready to rip you a new one, but I don’t feel so up to it now.”

He laughed. “It’s okay. You’re mad your two best friends got together. I get it. Well…I don’t really, but I’ll try.”

“Lane,” I said, “that isn’t why I’m mad. I’m mad that you left her for Amy last night.”

His eyebrows scrunched, confused. “What? I didn’t leave her for Amy.”

“Courtney thinks you did.”

He sat up straighter, then shot up off the couch. “Fuck,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair. “She really thinks that?”

“Yeah. She’s a little upset. I know I shouldn’t say this, but I think you need to know…Lane, she loves you. Has real feelings for you.”

“Damn it. I’ll be right back.” He walked down the hallway and disappeared for a minute before he came back holding his cell phone. “Here is the deal…I kinda feel the same way about her, but I never wanted to act on it because I figured you wouldn’t like it. You’ve been my best friend for forever, I can’t lose you.”

I stood up and hugged him. “You’re stuck with me, so no worries there, okay?” I tipped my head back to look at his sweet, handsome face. “And I want you with Courtney. My two best friends getting together is great. I won’t have to worry about hating your girlfriend or her boyfriend.”

He chuckled. “You hated Beth, didn’t you?”

“Yes,” I agreed. “She’s a bitch.”

“Okay.” Lane pulled back. “I’m going to call and see if I can talk to her this morning. Are we okay?”

I swallowed. “I don’t know, are we? Do you think less of me now?”

“No. Never. You know I love you, Alex. That will never change.”

I kissed his cheek. “He stays for his little girl. He doesn’t even sleep in the same room as his wife…Amy.”

“Oh, shit.” He snorted. “Well, that’s quite coincidental.”

“Yeah, it is.” I grabbed a donut hole then made my way to the door. “I gotta go. Good luck with Courtney. Love you.”

“Bye,” he said, already placing the call.

After leaving Lane’s apartment, I went by the coffee shop and grabbed a latte. It was starting to get chilly, so I ordered a regular hot one.

I was in a chipper mood knowing Lane felt the same way about Courtney as she did him, so I decided to stop by Javier’s office and surprise him. Once I entered the building, I jogged up the flight of stairs and walked toward his door. I came to an abrupt halt when I heard him talking to someone. Leaning against the wall, I tried to listen to the conversation. As soon as I heard the voice, I knew it was the girl from my calculus class. I think he had called her Mia, but in my head, she was “slut girl”. They seemed to be talking about calculus and nothing else, but she kept giggling every time he spoke. I imagined her twirling her hair, too, and I wanted to gag.

I took my phone out and texted him.

Me: Tell the slut to leave.

Listening, I heard him excuse himself to check his phone. Then, a minute later, “I’m really sorry. I’ve just been called into a meeting. If you have any other questions, I’m sure Emily can help you.”

“Oh. O-kay,” she said and I moved down the hallway a bit. A minute later, she sauntered out of his office and he stood in the doorway, smirking.

I grinned and stepped toward him. When I passed him, I inhaled, taking in his masculine scent. “To what do I owe this honor?”

He shut the door and I took the opportunity to shove him up against the wall. He grinned just before my lips crashed into his, causing a moan to rumble from his throat. I loved having that effect on him. Loved that I could turn him on at any time. His hands found my hair and I unbuttoned his pants, deciding to reward him for kicking the slutty girl out for me.

My nipples perked and my breasts became heavy at the thought of what I wanted to do. Once I unzipped his pants, I dropped to my knees abruptly. “What are—” I cut him off with my lips wrapping around his cock. He was hard, so ready for me. I let his length enter my mouth as my tongue slid along the underside. “Fuck…so good,” he hissed.

I picked up my pace, letting him slide slowly in and out, in and out. With one hand, I massaged his sack, with the other, I grabbed his magnificent ass and kneaded. I wanted to grin at the fact that I could now touch the ass I had once admired and drooled over.

Knowing other students and professors were just on the other side of the door while I continued to suck him turned me on. I knew it was wrong, dangerous even, but that just added to the appeal.

He grabbed onto the back of my head, pushed himself all the way into my mouth, and came, groaning quietly. After he was completely finished, I stood and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. “Good morning.”

“I have no idea,” Javier said, putting himself back in his pants, “what brought that on, but I would say it is a good morning indeed.”

I laughed and planted a kiss on his lips. “I’m in a good mood and wanted to surprise you.”