Imperfectly Perfect (15 page)

"I don't get it," Bradley said as we walked out under the green awning of the front of my building. We had recovered from our spat over Shane's drunken kiss rather easily. He admitted that he was wrong and we had moved past it. Yet, I could tell that he was still struggling with things; especially over my pre-Christmas tradition, since he wouldn't be a part of it.

"What don't you get?" I questioned, trying my best to hide my annoyance.

"The whole 'Ugly Sweater' thing," he moaned, "it's so outplayed."

"Well," I gasped, "we did ugly sweaters before they were cool."

"And I can't stay
because
…?"

"It's just for us and it has been for eight years. It's not that I don't want you there, it would just be awkward for you, that's all."

I was starting to think Bradley was a bit jealous when he leaned over and kissed me.

"Well have fun and I'll see you tomorrow." He smiled and walked to his car.

I was excited to be spending the next few days with Bradley. We were a few of the only people that would be staying in the city over the holiday. You would think that New York would remain a bustling hub of activity over a holiday, but that was hardly the case. College kids and young professionals made up the vast majority of the city population and they fled to their hometowns to be with their families over the festive period. Bradley would mostly be working, but I was looking forward to some intimate alone-time regardless. I needed some quality time alone with him in order to focus on our relationship and figure out where we were headed.

I stood there waving while he drove away. I felt bad leaving him out, but our relationship was relatively new and this was a sacred event; no one had brought a significant other since we made it a private event eight years ago.

Feeling giddy with excitement, I ran upstairs. We'd finished decorating the previous night and the condo looked amazing. Tyler and I had scoured Pinterest for hours looking for creative and tacky decorating ideas and the condo had Martha Stewart written all over it; right down to the cranberry popcorn string and beer bottles decorated like reindeer.

I laughed when I saw that the guys were already in their sweaters. They looked ridiculous. Tyler was sporting a skintight number adorned with Santa and Rudolph. Shane's was an interesting mosaic snowman. However, Rob easily took the cake with his Christmas ball sweater vest exposing his very hairy chest.

"Well done boys," I mused. "You've really outdone yourselves this year. But I have gone above and beyond, and I'm about to blow your mind."

I laughed, and ran towards my room. I ransacked my closet to find the gem that I had hidden. I happened across it at a Salvation Army store in Maine while I had been up there for my parents' anniversary, and I'd wanted to keep it top secret for precisely this moment.

I slid the scratchy wool over my head and admired myself in the mirror; the guys were going to love it. I strutted out into the living room as though I was America's Next Top Model wearing an award winning design. In other words, I owned it.

The guys burst out laughing, obviously in awe of my amazing Christmas tree sweater dress. It was truly a work of art.

"Well," Shane gasped in between chuckles, "I think Emma has won this year."

I began to bow. "Thank you, thank you!"

"Here," Rob said handing me a glass of eggnog, "careful though, Tyler made it strong this year."

"Okay," I took a sip of my drink and winced as it burned my throat. "Well there, I'm ready to exchange gifts!"

We sat next to our tree just as though we were kids again and I clapped my hands in excitement.

"Alright Emma," Tyler motioned, "start us off."

I handed each of the guys their gifts, all wrapped by me personally (I didn't believe in paying to have someone else wrap a gift that I had painstakingly chosen). Rob went first, quickly opening the custom NYU cufflinks that I had chosen for him.

"I love them. Thanks Em."

Tyler went next. He tore into the silver paper I had chosen for this particular year, eventually revealing the small box that contained two tickets to the New Year's Day Patriots game. His face lit up. I knew he hadn't been since his father died a few years previously. It had been a tradition for them, and he hadn't been able to afford to go since. He was too proud to accept any money from his mother. She offered but he always declined, saying he wanted to do things himself and I couldn't blame him for that.

"Thanks Em," he said as he held up the tickets. "Now Talon and I can go together, it's perfect."

I smiled, knowing that Tyler would get to take his younger brother to experience something meaningful he had missed out on with his dad. I directed my attention to Shane, anxious to see the reaction to his gift. I had really outdone myself this year, and I loved it.

He gently and slowly picked at the paper. He had always been so meticulous about unwrapping presents and it drove me crazy; I wanted to knock him out of the way and tear it open for him. Once he finally made his way through the wrapping paper he smiled.

"Well," Rob said, "are you going to show us what you got?"

Shane held up the clear box containing an iPod.

"Big whoop," Tyler said, "you've finally got an iPod loser, now let's move on."

Tyler started handing out his gifts while Shane and I shared a secret smile. The gift wasn't just about the iPod. Sure it was great, and Tyler was right, Shane was probably the only person in New York that didn't already own one. But the best part was the engraving that I had requested on it:

'
You'll always be my favorite"

It was an ongoing argument of sorts between the boys. They constantly razzed one another about who was the favorite, always biding for 'brownie points.' But everyone knew deep down that my relationship with Shane was sacred. He and I knew everything about each other and we had been there for each other through it all. It was only natural that he would be my best friend.

The more eggnog we drank, the more chaotic things became. It was close to midnight when the guys finally presented their gift to me. They always went in on something together because they claimed my tastes were too expensive. I knew it was just because they lacked creativity but either way, I didn't really care. This year they had gone big and gotten me the Hermès bag I had been dying for and I won't lie, I cried like a baby.

Tyler and Rob started cleaning up the mess while I transferred all my junk from my old purse into the new Hermès.

"Come with me for a second," Shane said, grabbing my hand as he stalked down the hallway.

I threw my new bag over my shoulder as I followed closely behind. He led me into his room and quickly closed the door.

"Thanks again for my gift," he said, "and don't worry your secret is safe with me."

"I'm glad you liked it. So what's up?"

Shane rummaged through his computer desk and pulled out a small golden package.

"Well I got you a little something extra."

"You shouldn't have done that," I said as he placed the gift in my hands.

"I wanted to."

I quickly tore into the paper and opened the box. My breath hitched as I looked inside; it was a replica of a beautiful bracelet I had lost so long ago.

"It looks just like it," I whispered.

"They don't make that particular one anymore," he said as he took the bracelet and fastened it around my wrist, "and this was the closest I could find."

I stared in amazement at the jewelry on my wrist. Of course I remembered exactly what it looked like, but it blew my mind that Shane had too. Years ago, in college, I had lost the only Cape Cod bracelet I had ever owned. My Gramps had bought it for me as an eighth grade graduation present the year before he died. I cherished it like no other piece of jewelry I had owned. I wore it everyday, taking it off only for soccer and showers. One day, I forgot to take it off before a game. Realizing at the last moment, I quickly slipped it into my gym bag where it vanished. Obviously some scumbag had stolen it, and I never forgave myself for losing such a cherished piece of sterling silver.

"I love it," I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck. "This right here is exactly why you will
always
be my favorite."

The guys left early the next morning. Tyler and Shane went on an early flight to Maine and Rob dropped them off at the airport on his way home to New Jersey. The condo was eerily quiet, but part of me enjoyed the time to myself.

Things had been crazy lately. Work was a zoo while I tried to finalize everything for the final product launch for Under Armour and things with Bradley had been a bit rocky. I really wanted things to work out and so I was hoping that some time alone for the two of us would really strengthen our relationship. While I wasn't sure if I loved him-or if he even loved me-I knew I loved the way he made me feel when he was around.

I enjoyed my morning cup of coffee while scouring the morning newspaper when my buzzer went off. Hurrying because Bradley was waiting for me, I took one final swig as I grabbed my fabulous new Hermès.

"Be right down." I called throwing my jacket on.

I smiled instantly when I saw him standing under the awning waiting for me. Looking at him never seemed to get old. Seriously, he looked like he should have been on the cover of GQ. He had a great sense of style too, and today was no different. He was nicely pulled together with khakis and a brown pea coat. I greeted him with a quick peck on the cheek.

"Hey gorgeous," he said, interlocking his fingers with mine, "you ready to spend some quality time at my place1?"

"I'm so ready."

We started walking towards the subway and I felt his eyes burning on me. "Something wrong?" I asked.

"New bag?" he questioned.

"Oh," I stammered, feeling slightly uncomfortable. Bradley was definitely one of the more observant men I knew. "Yeah, the guys got it for me for Christmas. They always chip in and get me something really nice, so this year they got me the Hermès I've been drooling over for ages."

"I didn't realize you guys exchanged gifts," he said coolly.

"We always have. I love giving gifts," I chirped, "I can't wait for you to open yours!"

Bradley offered a half-hearted smile and I could tell that he was bothered by something but I wasn't really sure what. I guessed he was still jealous of my relationship with the boys, but decided to just go with the flow. If something was really bothering him, he would tell me… I hoped.

We spent the rest of the journey in silence. Bradley fumbled nervously with his keys as we entered his penthouse. I was beginning to feel like we were having problems already and it made me sick to my stomach. It hadn't even been two months into our relationship, and I was already pushing him away. I was beginning to think I was destined to live the rest of my life alone.

"Alright," I said digging through my purse for the small square package I had placed in there earlier. My hands made contact and I grabbed it quickly, my heart fluttered. "Open my gift for you." I passed the box to Bradley and smiled. I was trying my best to smooth whatever this was over.

"You didn't have to get anything for me," he offered pleasantly as he tore into the silver paper. I had gone for something small and simple, since we'd only been together for a short time, but I watched his eyes light up when he saw how thoughtful I had been.

"It's perfect Emma," he said fingering the smooth leather of the new wallet.

"I noticed that your wallet was in rough shape."

"That's an understatement," he said as he yanked the old wallet from his back pocket, "I've had this thing since I was in high school. In fact, I think it was the first wallet I ever bought."

"Well I figured a wallet was something you would never buy for yourself, so I went ahead and picked one out for you. If you don't like it I have the receipt."

"No, I love it. Thank you!"

I smiled as I watched him excitedly transfer his cash and cards from one wallet to the other. He stopped and frowned as he turned to grab a vase full of red roses from the counter.

"I wish I had gotten you something nicer," he said passing me the flowers.

"Oh stop, these are amazing! I
never
get flowers," I said. That was the truth. I never bought them for myself, and you can be sure that none of my previous boyfriends had bothered to get them for me. I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him on the forehead. "Thank you."

Bradley wrapped his arms around my waist, scooping me up like a ragdoll. "You're so perfect."

I giggled at his flattery. He constantly showered me with compliments, and if I'm honest, I was still a little uncomfortable being on the receiving end of such nice words. "Nobody is perfect," I argued.

"Well you're pretty close," he muttered, setting me back down on the floor. He immediately turned his attention to the refrigerator. Popping the door open he searched aimlessly for something. I still got the feeling that he was annoyed with me; like something else was on his mind. He obviously wasn't going to say anything on his own, so I took the floor. "Is something bothering you?" I questioned.