Children in Her Shadow (11 page)

On the group’s arrival Sarah rushed over to Ruth, embraced her and said, “I know you are going out with Edward and I’m pleased for you Ruth. As you know, Edward and I are finished so it doesn’t matter to me and it shouldn’t affect our friendship.” The gesture felt contrived and it was soon evident why, when Ruth saw Edward only a few feet away with a group of young men and it was obvious that he had seen her and Sarah too.

Sarah, having achieved what she appeared to have set out to do, smugly moved over to where Edward was by now seated. She broke into their company kissed Edward on the cheek, whispered something into his ear and in a slow haughty manner she returned to Ruth’s group. Clearly there were games being played and Ruth felt distinctly uncomfortable.

As the evening wore on, the inevitable happened and Ruth found herself isolated at one end of the ice rink very close to Edward. Edward, evidently pleased to see her, threw his arms around her, drew her towards him and kissed her. Ruth enjoyed the embrace but pressed Edward to know what Sarah was up to. “Oh Ruth” he said, “You have so much to learn … she’s jealous of you and she knows that you and I are having a good time and frankly, she wishes she were in your place.” Ruth thought this a plausible but rather arrogant perspective but let it go.

It was to be another week before Ruth and Edward had planned to meet up again and so it was a surprise, as they skated back towards their group of friends when Edward asked if she would like to come to his home on Sunday for lunch where she could meet his parents and his two aunts who would also be there. This seemed to Ruth to be a rather impulsive offer and as they walked off the rink, Ruth checked that Edward’s mother would be happy with his arrangement and she also asked if it was not a little sudden in their relationship for her to be meeting his parents. Edward responded by drawing her close to him and saying, “Well you know I love you and I think you love me so let’s see what my family say.”

That evening Ruth lay awake thinking of the two statements Edward had made; the presumption that she loved him and the statement that he loved her coupled with the suggestion that she should in some way now be meeting his family at this early stage in their courtship. Ruth repeatedly asked herself if she was in love with Edward. She pondered this for a while before convincing herself that despite some, perhaps many, reservations yes she did love him. Therefore, logically it followed that there was every reason why Edward should want to invite her to meet his family.

Ruth discussed the week’s events and revelations with Moira the following night and not surprisingly, Moira was concerned by the haste and the implications of moving this quickly when Ruth knew so little about Edward. Moira counselled Ruth to use the time with Edward’s family to learn more about them and Edward and to form a more considered view about the pace of their relationship once she had a perspective on him and his family.

The Sunday arrived and as Ruth looked at her diary all she could see was Sunday eighth of March
lunch with Edward’s family
. Ruth had bathed that morning and following the war time regulation she had used less than four inches of only tepid water. Bathing more than once in ten days was regarded as wasteful and so Ruth was more used to standing at the sink and washing herself down with a damp flannel each day. She had made a smart new dress for the lunch meeting, being careful to avoid the frivolity of fashion which was so denounced by older people as unbecoming in war time Britain.

Rationing was tough on women where all that was deemed necessary in a year was one pair of shoes, six pairs of stockings, eight ounces of wool or two yards of fabric, one silk dress, two or three pairs of knickers, two or three brassieres or a girdle, and six hankies. Ruth had been known like many other women to paint her legs with gravy browning to imitate stocking which were expensive and hard to replace. However, today was the day to wear the stockings given to her by Auntie Lottie and to wear her best shoes. Moira had helped wash and brush Ruth’s long black hair to make it look its best, which it did.

The arrangement was that Ruth should call at Edward’s house at twelve o’clock which she did. The door was opened by a tall man who introduced himself as Edward’s father, Sam. He was a smart slim looking man who was dressed in a grey suit and wore what was clearly a regimental tie. Ruth had not been brought up with such formality in the home and felt herself immediately disarmed. Mr Carmichael, as he clearly expected to be called ushered Ruth into the house and through into a small living room where she was then introduced to Ellen, Edward’s mother and his two Aunts, Matilda and Dorothy.

Ruth felt a flush rising up her neck and she also felt her knees knocking as it became clear that for the time being at least there was no sign of Edward. Ruth was politely asked to sit in the only chair in the room whilst the rest of the gathering sat on two small sofas. Ruth sat and looked out at the penetrating eyes of the Carmichael’s who would not have been out of place as characters at the Spanish inquisition.

With the pleasantries such as they were, out of the way, Ellen asked, “So how long have you known our dear Edward?” When Ruth politely replied that she had known him for some months Aunt Matilda seized upon the opportunity to say, “Ah yes you met our dear Edward through Sarah ….we love Sarah and….well, my dear I cannot understand why she and Edward didn’t reconcile their differences and get on and marry.” Ruth had never encountered anyone with the poise and composure of this tiny woman and had not expected that the two delicate subjects of marriage and Sarah would enter the conversation at all and certainly not quite so early in their meeting.

Ruth acknowledged that she was well aware of the circumstances that led to Edward and Sarah breaking up their relationship but felt she had to politely but firmly point out that it was not until after they had split up that she accepted Edward’s invitation to date.

The questioning continued, Aunt Dorothy, asked, “I understand that you are from Wales and that your parents are Irish, what a quaint combination of two very poor Celtic nations … what was it like growing up in a poor mining area?” Ruth, ever the innocent drifted back to her strong valley accent and proudly proclaimed the tremendous merits of growing up in a mining community where no one had much but what they had they shared.

When she had passionately reflected her love of Wales and its people Aunt Matilda spluttered as though the coal dust of the valleys had caught in her throat and declared in a disparaging voice, “Oh how charming it is to hear the simple tones of Ruth’s Welsh lilt though I was expecting to hear some of your parents more earthy Irish brogue penetrate your accent.”

The questioning and innuendo was relentless. When there was a momentary pause Ruth took the opportunity to ask if the assembled company knew where Edward was. Sam grasped the moment to speak and said “Oh he’s in his wireless shack…..” and with that the assembled company glared at him as though he had broken wind. “I mean he is playing with some old radio, I’ll go and get him.”

The conversation moved from questioning Ruth to the three women speaking about her as though she were not in the room. At length, Edward arrived and sat on the arm of Ruth’s chair. Other than acknowledging her with a quiet hello and welcome, and without showing any affection towards Ruth, Edward immediately fell under the protective spell of these matriarchs.

Edward’s demeanour was almost childlike as each vied with the other to stroke the ego of their beloved boy. As their darling only child, Edward seemed to be the centre of both their attention and their comments, and their nauseating sycophantic comments continued throughout lunch. It seemed that all Ruth could hear were uttering’s of pride for Edward; his school achievements, his engineering skills, his contribution whilst in the Merchant Navy and his vital input to the work at Vickers. To Ruth, the only thing they had not mentioned was Edward the walking talking potty trained infant prodigy!

In an attempt to enter the Edward fan club Ruth took a momentary break in the conversation to ask Edward to tell her a little about his work as a Special Constable. The room went silent as each turned to the other until eventually Edward said “In war time it is improper and dangerous to idly talk about the work of any such body” and that was the matter closed. Once again, Ruth found that any attempt to penetrate the real Edward and his work was simply closed down as no go territory.

When the lunch was finished Edward’s mother announced that she had made an apple pie from cooking apples stored from last autumn. Edward was dispatched to the kitchen in a well rehearsed routine to make the custard to a chorus of “Oh Edward makes wonderful custard.” By the time lunch was over with and Ruth was about to depart it seemed to her that the only story that had not been told about Edward was his ability to feed the five thousand and walk on water!

With polite thanks to everyone, Ruth and Edward left the house with Edward walking her to the bus stop. Ruth waited until she could not be heard before asking in her strongest Welsh, Valley accent, “What the hell was all that about … they clearly had decided before I arrived that a valley girl was not good enough for their precious Edward.” Edward was dismissive saying that the family only wanted the best for him. He went on to say that there was no doubt that they were very fond of Sarah but that they would also grow fond of her too. Ruth was furious but saw the problem as entirely that of his parents and Aunts. As they strolled to the bus stop they set aside the challenges of the lunch and agreed to meet again the following weekend.

Ruth and Edward continued to date most weeks throughout March and April spending time in the company of their friends and also going out alone to the cinema and dancing. In the middle of May, with the days growing longer Edward asked if Ruth would like to take a trip out with him on the following Saturday evening to visit the Trough of Bowland to see the sun setting over Morecambe bay. Ruth was delighted and immediately agreed. She saw the offer to get out into the countryside and into the hills as a welcome opportunity to remind herself of her Welsh hills and valleys.

Edward picked Ruth up at about seven o’clock and they chatted as they left Blackpool and headed towards the Pennine hills in the distance. Edward continued his drive up to the narrow winding Trough of Bowland road, across the bleak open moorland between Lancaster and Abbeystead. Ruth lay back in the car seat and soaked up the sheer beauty of the barren hillside which on that late spring evening was by now catching the rays from the setting sun.

Eventually, they reached a stone tower set alongside the road which Edward explained was called Jubilee Tower. The small square Tower, built to commemorate Queen Victoria’s diamond jubilee was located on this spot because of its commanding views across Morecambe Bay and Blackpool with some saying that on a good day you can even see to the Isle of Man.

Edward confided that this was one of his favourite places on earth, a place his father would bring him as a child and somewhere that for him encapsulated his beloved Lancashire. Ruth was touched by the way that Edward spoke in a voice that betrayed a genuine emotion as he described the many trips he had taken here as a child. As Edward talked at length about his love for the countryside and people of Lancashire Ruth was drawn into the intimate relationship he and his family had for these moors and the place and county he passionately called home.

Edward parked the car as the sun was lowering in the western sky. He stepped out of the car, opened the passenger door and gently took Ruth’s hand and walked her across the road to the tower where they climbed the few steps to the top. The view was breathtaking as the colour infused light from the sinking sun skipped across the water of Morecambe bay casting a long band of light that seemed to point directly at them. There they remained until the last sign of the sun had faded below the horizon. In all the time they had been there they had not seen another vehicle or another person. They were totally alone and free to embrace and share their love for each other without interference or embarrassment.

Perhaps it was the occasion or perhaps they had reached the point in their relationship when they were ready to give themselves to each other but that night on that moorland they made love.

They remained there until about nine thirty when Edward suggested that they must leave and with little said they stepped back into the car and set off down the hill to return to Blackpool. Ruth’s memories of the passionate moments of their love making were fading as the stark reality of the possible consequences began to trouble her mind. She found herself constantly seeking reassurance from Edward: “You do love me don’t you” to which he readily answered “Yes.”

On their journey back to Ruth’s house they arranged to meet again in three weeks time. Edward explained that he could not see her sooner because he had commitments to his Special Constable work every night for three weeks. Edward drew the car to a stop at the entrance to Apple Tree Crescent and with a brief kiss and a hug they said goodnight and Ruth walked the few yards home.