Asperger's on the Job: Must-Have Advice for People With Asperger's or High Functioning Autism, and Their Employers, Educators, and Advocates (9 page)

“My ideal boss would be easy to talk to, understand me, and let me take flexible hours.”

- DIANE

“My issues are usually sensory, and the imperative need to actually be at work for a set period of time. I dread things that I have to do. I will usually do things I need to as long as they are not time sensitive.”

- TOM

Many with AS do work long hours, some virtually every moment of their day, including weekends. Even the unemployed people interviewed for this book kept constantly busy with creative projects and potential business endeavors. These included art, music, writing, invention, mechanics, software development, and more.

• Being able to work from home is grand, no doubt. And I highly recommend asking for flexible working arrangements if you can get them. But as long as you are an employee you may still be required to go in for meetings, or to participate in conference calls. Take it from one who knows; you can still feel the same discomfort at phone meetings and you can still say the wrong thing. And you will still be scrutinized at those times, and your participation judged and rated. Another downside to working from home is that it doesn’t give you the social interaction and practice you may crave and require. But it is a great potential solution to many of the issues in this book
  
• Be mindful of the times you are under scrutiny. Practice projecting confidence, not annoyance.
  
• You can ask for more autonomy, but how you ask will affect whether or not you get what you need. For example, saying “I don’t like being watched” under your breath while avoiding eye contact will make your superior question what you have to hide and probably result in your being watched a lot more. Try smiling and making momentary eye contact and saying “If it is all right with you, I’d like to be given a bit more trust. I have a hard time being watched when I work (interact with customers, etc.). It makes me shy and self-conscious.”
  
• Disclosure may help and will be discussed at length in its own chapter.
  
• If you are not self-employed, you have to take instructions from your boss or supervisor, and listen to someone else’s way of doing things. Imagine that you owned the company. You would certainly want your employees to do things your way, within reason, would you not?
  
• Following instructions, and taking direction does not mean you are subservient; it means you are reasonable and willing to learn. While the phrase “team player” is not normally identified with Asperger’s, you can certainly understand the benefits of cooperation in theory; try putting it into practice. For a visual metaphor, think of rock climbers or trapeze artists who work in pairs or teams, in which their very life may depend upon trusting the skill of another.
  
• Difficulty sleeping regular hours is common and requires a combination of discipline and relaxation aids and techniques to overcome. There are plenty of non-pharmaceutical, non-addictive sleep aids available, many of them cheap or free. They include: melatonin tablets or other natural sleep tabs (available at health food stores, the organic section of your grocery store, or in the natural supplements section in drug stores), chamomile tea, lavender scent, and nature sounds or soft music. Do not keep a television or computer in your bedroom; the temptation to use them, as well as the frequencies given off by electronic equipment, can keep you awake. Get plenty of physical exercise and lots of fresh air.
  
• There are various types of therapy that we can undertake to deal with any or all aspects of AS—from social to sensory. Success with such therapies will depend upon a few factors, but may be worth pursuing if the practitioner is well-versed in ASDs, or if the method is specific to spectrum disorders. Research your options, be proactive, find something you can have confidence in.
  

Britain’s
Employment Act 2002
gave certain parents the legal right to ask their employers to seriously consider flexible working arrangements pertaining to both hours and location (when and where they worked). It is probably a matter of time before this law extends to certain individuals such as those with AS. In the US there are currently no laws requiring companies to consider flexible work, but many companies are offering it to valued employees because of its
mutual
benefits (Kelly & Kalev 2006).

• Consider allowing your AS employee to work from home. While not possible for all, with technology as advanced as it is, many jobs can comfortably and effectively be conducted outside the office. This saves the company money on office space and energy bills, and possibly even on salary (the employee will need to spend far less on fuel, parking, tolls, office clothing, lunches, etc.). This one change could solve virtually every issue in this book; it is changing the job to accommodate the human rather than vice-versa.
  
• If it is possible for an employee to work flexible hours, allow them. As long as the work is getting done on time, does it really matter if business is conducted nine-to-five?
  
• Give clear instructions and deadlines, then just let them get on with it in their own way and at their own pace. Do not micromanage time spent.
  
• Don’t talk down to an AS employee. Most of us are very smart; our slowness at picking up certain things usually comes from
  over-stimulation or sensory processing difficulties resulting in confusion,
  and a
  tendency to overanalyze.
  
• When giving instructions, do not be pedantic or have a “my way or the highway” attitude. Lead and challenge rather than dictate.
  

Are FWAs possible for the current position?

Why does scrutiny make you uncomfortable?

B
eing aware of what we look like to others does not strictly relate to our facial expressions or demeanor—for some, especially when we are young, hygiene, neatness, and just dressing attractively can be a problem. This can have an impact on being bullied and most of us do decide at some point to make an effort to work on our personal style. We learn to find things that are comfortable
and
look good. By the time a person with AS reaches adulthood, and sometimes much earlier, they seem to have a good sense of what they do and do not like, can and cannot wear. This comes from trial and error—a lifetime of trying clothes that were uncomfortable, or styles that were fussy and distracting. People with Asperger’s will put comfort and practicality before style and conformity, every time. This does not mean that your male AS employee will turn up
in sweats or your female in a hippie caftan. On the contrary; they will dress appropriately, but there might be expectations in the workplace that aggravate both their logic and their skin. AS men may strongly dislike the feeling of a tie, collared shirt or stiff shoes, and prefer loose clothing with a broken-in feel. Women with Asperger’s might have a strong aversion to pantyhose and high heels. The former are both uncomfortable and impractical because they don’t last and are a huge waste of money over a woman’s professional lifetime. These bits of attire are often spoken or unspoken requirements for office wear and again, may seem slightly superfluous to one’s duties:

“I’m expected to wear heels at the office. I’m six feet tall as it is.”

- DIANE

The need for comfort and control over the environment begins with one’s own skin and is important enough to an AS person to be a factor in taking or keeping a job. Being uncomfortable would detract from their enjoyment of the work and their ability to focus. It just isn’t logical to be uncomfortable all day.

“I’m hesitant to apply for jobs with dress codes I don’t care for (i.e., suit and tie). If I take a job with a dress code, I make myself comply if I choose to take the paycheck.”

- MIKE

Why a person with autism has skin sensitivity may be explained by any or all of these three factors: Some believe that autism starts with a compromised digestive system (Campbell-McBride 2004) and following that, that people with autism develop
food allergies.
This would affect all areas of the body, including the skin.
Stress,
which we know is inherent in AS, would be another factor in skin sensitivity.
Sensory processing difficulties
are part of autism, and touch is one of the senses affected.

For some,
time
is a factor. They may simply dislike spending too much of it on their appearance; a little is fine, but more than that is frivolous. For others, it is more about the
decision;
choosing an outfit is just another variable and choice they’d prefer to eliminate from their daily routine. As a result, some people with AS will love wearing a uniform because it will eliminate that whole process. Dr. Temple Grandin has created her own uniform, by wearing the same “Annie Oakley”-type shirt every day, with soft t-shirts underneath and soft trousers.

Stephen Shore, in his article “Survival in the Work Place” (2008), describes how he used to bicycle to work every day at an accounting firm. This was a logical choice: he could enjoy nature, get some exercise, and save both time and money. Perfect for the sensible Aspergian mind. Although Stephen would change into his work clothes as soon as he arrived, his employer had a problem with him entering the building wearing cycling clothes. They told him he had to stop riding his bike and start showing up in “uniform.” He was let go after three months.

Looking like you belong to your tribe is an ancient survival mechanism, and the corporate tribe (or blue collar, etc.) is no different. Although costumes change and so do norms (as reflected in “casual Friday”), what attire you’ll be expected to wear should be part of the decision-making process when choosing your career path.

• Don’t let the idea of a new way of dressing prevent you from going for or taking a job. You can find a style that suits you, without compromising your physical needs.
  
• If the job you love/want dictates that you must wear a suit and tie or similar attire, know that there are alternative fabrics that are natural and comfortable. You may have to splash out a bit of money and time initially, but it is always good to update your looks.
  
• Real silk pantyhose are a very different experience than the usual nylon “deathtraps” as one AS woman called them. They are expensive, but do last much longer than the drugstore variety (if you can find them!).
  
• Open-toed high-heeled shoes tend to be more comfortable than closed-toe.
  
• Some dresses and suits are nearly as comfortable as pajamas.
  
• Have fun with dressing up. We can all get stale from time to time, and the Asperger requirement of comfort can mean that some of us would never leave our bathrobes if we could get away with it. Yet we all want to be considered attractive, don’t we?
  
• Make a point and a plan to spend some time on a new project: your professional appearance. You might be pleasantly surprised at the results.
  
• If there are certain items required by your job, e.g., a uniform, hardhat or something that you find unbearable, you will have to talk to your boss to see what the alternative could be. If you don’t want to disclose AS, say you have skin allergies or something similar.
  
• Many with AS like the feel of tight clothes with no air or fabric brushing against the skin. This is due to skin sensitivity, but loose or fussy clothing is another thing that is moving around you, another distraction. Many with AS like tight pressure on the body, but soft textures. There are things you can wear under your work clothes that will give you that feeling of security you require, such as a posture belt, shirt, or leggings. This can also help with temperature issues, as discussed earlier.
  

• Customers and clients may not be as interested in seeing an office clone as you think. There is growing evidence that staff should be as diverse as a company’s customer base. This makes organizations more creative and improves their profitability (NAS 2005). As long as a person is clean and presentable, allowing some personal expression might make an employee want to stick around because he/she likes it, rather than staying in it for the money. How many of us long for a little bit more freedom and self-expression in our lives and in our work?
  
• If you have to ask your AS employee to dress differently, please be tactful. Accentuate the positive: “you look great in a tailored suit,” as opposed to “did you forget to change out of your pajamas today?”