A Winter Sabbatical (Books We Love holiday romance) (6 page)

Marissa didn’t respond. “Marissa?”

Travis leaned forward. She was sound
asleep. He gently patted the excess oil from her back, and then covered her
with a blanket.

Travis lay on the bed next to her, watching
her sleep. Over a period of time, he watched a variety of expressions come over
her face. She tossed and turned, flung her arms around, and even cried out.

Perspiration formed on her forehead and
above her lip. Marissa tensed her fists, her jaw, screamed Jeremy’s name, and
then relaxed.

Did she do this every night? No wonder she
was tired.

When she settled, Travis lay back and
drifted into a light sleep himself. He was lying on lush grass, the sun was
shining, and it was warming his face, his body, and his heart. Marissa was
there beside him. He was kissing her, more importantly she was kissing him
back. His arms were wrapped around her, his hands softly stroking her breast. They
were alone, totally alone, not a soul in sight.

Her heart piercing screams woke him.

Marissa sat up, screaming, sobbing, and
shaking. Travis pulled her against him, stroking her hair, talking quietly to
her, trying to calm her.

He looked at her questioningly, but Marissa
gave nothing away. He held her tight, not willing to let go. Marissa sobbed
until she could sob no more.

Travis pulled the blanket up around her now
bare shoulders. “Marissa,” he spoke her name quietly.

She frowned. Had she guessed what he was
about to ask?

“Tell me about Jeremy.”

“I— I don’t think I can.” Travis reached
out and brushed her cheek with his fingers, then leaned forward and lightly
kissed it.

“Try?”

She shook her head vigorously, and Travis
could see he was just upsetting her again. Would she ever open her heart to
him?

He didn’t push her, instead he made them a
hot drink, and they sat in a companionable silence while they drank.

“I want to go for a walk.” Her words came
out of the blue, startling him.

Marissa was over her distress of earlier.
It was getting late, and the light was dimming.

“Now?”

Marissa looked at him with pleading eyes.
What could he do? He couldn’t say no when she looked at him like that. “On one
condition,” He had to warn her of the dangers. “That you never, ever, go out
there alone.”

“Never, ever?”
She was teasing him, just like he did so often with her.

“Never, ever.
There
is
a walking path
not far from here. In fact, if Daniel had a back gate, you would nearly be
there.”

Those pleading eyes
again.

“Oh, all right. Come on, get your coat.”

***

She had to get out. She was feeling
stifled, closed in. It was as though she hadn’t been outside for years.

Marissa stood with Travis in the midst of
the forest, breathing deeply. The foliage here was dense. Its fragrance, the
essence of nature, overwhelmed her. This was living. This was what life was all
about.

Marissa wrapped her arms around herself and
spun around.

He probably thought she was mad. She had
her eyes closed. She didn’t want to look at him; he was probably watching her
intently, like he did sometimes. Like when she acted a little crazy.

Crazy was all right sometimes, wasn’t it? A
person couldn’t be refined and sane all the time, could they?

Then again, was she ever refined and sane?
Perhaps not.

She opened her eyes slowly. There he was,
staring at her.
Laughing at her.
Marissa didn’t care. She
needed to feel free. Free from life, free from the world, free from... Jeremy.

There
he goes again, slipping into my brain.

“Leave me the hell alone!” Marissa screamed
it out, and then ran off into the bushes.

She took him by surprise.
What the hell was she playing at? What had
she meant?
She didn’t mean
him, that
much he
understood. It was that damned Jeremy again. He was sure of it.

“
Marissa.
”
He called her name. He couldn’t see her; she’d run so quickly out of sight. “
Marissa!
” He could hear the urgency in
his own voice. If he didn’t find her fast, she could get lost out here – it was
nearly dark.

What the hell had he been thinking,
bringing her here at this hour of the night? Yes, it had been her idea, and
yes, he gave into her pleading eyes. So, yes, it
was
his fault. “
Marissa!
For God’s sake, where are you?”

He heard the breaking of twigs not far
ahead. “Marissa?” He turned to see a fox scampering deeper into the bushes.
Damn.

He had to find her. He spun around as he
heard a sound.

“
Travis!
”
Thank God. He would never have lived with himself if anything had happened to
her.

He couldn’t continue to exist without her. What
did he do before she came into his life? He barely survived; he thought he was
alive before, that was just a fallacy. Life with Marissa was living, really
living.

They stood in the near-darkness, just
holding each other. Travis had never been so petrified in his entire life.

She was shaking, still terrified from her
ordeal, and he wasn’t much better. He couldn’t leave her alone. Not now.

Not ever.

“Come home with me. I have to go and feed
Jonah, but I don’t want to leave you here alone.” It was an excuse, merely an
excuse, and Marissa probably saw through it.

She scrutinized him, and he felt almost
violated. He deserved it, letting her go like that.
Taking
her into the damned forest to get lost.

Daniel hadn’t told him she was like this –
terrified, lonely, and sporadic. Maybe if he had, things would be different.

Probably
not,
Travis decided.
Can’t go blaming poor Daniel, who’s
thousands of miles away.
This,
Travis Johnston, is your own damned fault
he scolded himself.
Just tell the girl you love her and be done
with it. That way, she might settle down. She also might tell you what the hell
is eating her up.

Jonah was at the backdoor waiting. He
rubbed himself up against Marissa’s leg, as if
she
was the one who fed him.

“Traitor,” Travis told him as he unlocked
the door.

Marissa hadn’t seen Jonah for ages, but he
still seemed to recognize her. She leaned down and patted his soft fur.

“Meeeooooooow,” he responded. Travis held
the door ajar, and Jonah scampered in.

Marissa stood in the open doorway. She
shivered as a chill went through her, and Travis reached out and rubbed his
hand across her back.

She was really glad Travis had invited her
over. She didn’t want to be alone tonight. Jeremy was even invading her days
now; he’d gotten to her in the forest.

She’d tried to get away, but he stayed with
her, always with her. It was fruitless; Jeremy would always haunt her, forever
haunt her, and Marissa knew it.

How could she explain to Travis? It was bad
enough having to think about it, let alone talk about it.

She was still standing in the doorway;
Travis’ voice broke into her thoughts.

“I said,” he was telling her, apparently
not for the first time, “what would you like for dinner?”

“Huh?”
Concentrate,
Marissa, concentrate,
she warned herself.
“Dinner?
Don’t worry about me, just fix Jonah up.” She shrugged her shoulders. What was
wrong with her? She hadn’t heard a thing he’d said. Was she in shock? Could a
person go into shock without that person knowing it?

Marissa helped with the feeding of Jonah,
then put on the jug at Travis’ request. He wanted her to have a bath, or a
shower. Said it would make her feel better.

Make her feel better? Nothing would make
her feel better. At least, not until Jeremy left
her
alone – let her get on with her life.

She felt his arm slip around her shoulders,
but knew it was imagination. Ghosts aren’t solid – you can’t feel ghosts.

“Are you all right, Marissa?” It was
Travis’ voice. Thank God – it was Travis. Perhaps she wasn’t going mad, after
all.

“I, I think maybe I should have that
shower.” What made her think a shower would make everything all right again,
she didn’t know. But Travis seemed to think it would help, and at this point in
time, she was willing to try anything.

She folded her clothes in a neat little
pile and placed them on the bathroom stool.

Marissa stepped into the large shower
cubicle. Travis had a nice place. He even had a spa-bath. How she’d love to own
a spa; to climb into the gently bubbling water at night, full of relaxing salts
or oils – whenever she felt like it. She’d soak for hours.
At
least, until the water cooled down.
Yes, a spa would be lovely.

The hot water sprayed on her face, and
trickled down her shoulders, onto her back and legs. It felt wonderful,
cascading over her like that.

The pressure must be better in this part of
town. She couldn’t get this sort of spray at Daniel’s place.

“Mrffsa.”
What was that? “
Marissa.
”
Loud and clear this time.

Marissa stuck her head around the shower
door, keeping her naked body covered.

“Travis?” What was he doing in here?

“I forgot to give you a towel.” He stepped
into the bathroom, and his eyes drifted toward her. “It sure is steamy in
here.” Travis flicked on the exhaust fan.

Marissa watched him walk over to the stool
and drop a thick towel on top of her clothes. “You can go now,” she told him,
but noticed him staring.

What
did he look
like without those clothes, she wondered. What would it be like, making love to
him? What would it be like, making love to him on that fluffy rug in front of a
roaring fire? Marissa was getting aroused just thinking about it. She’d never
had these kinds of thoughts about Travis before. Or had she, and she’d tried to
deny it?

It was time to take control of her life,
her destiny.

The steam had cleared, and so had the
shower screen. Travis stood rigid, couldn’t drag his eyes away.
God, she was beautiful.

“You have two choices – one, get the hell
out of here, or two; climb in with me.”

Did he hear her correctly? “What did you say?”
He shook his head. No way – she
didn’t
invite
him into her shower.

“I said, get the hell out of here, or climb
in with me.”

Travis slowly began to unbutton his shirt. Had
he taken leave of his senses? Could this be seen as taking advantage? Would she
hate him in the morning – would he hate himself in the morning?

He stood stripped of every piece of
clothing – Marissa had watched him undress. It felt right somehow.
As though it was the most natural thing to do.
With her – only with her.

He opened the shower door and stepped in. Marissa
had her hair tied back, to keep it dry. He preferred it down – but it suited
her this way too.

What the hell was he thinking? He was in
the shower with a naked woman, with Marissa, and he’s thinking about her hair?

He looked at her – she was standing under
the water, it ran down her face, over her breasts, her...

He leaned forward and kissed her gently,
then slid his hands down over her buttocks. He reached for the soap, lathered
his hands, and ran them over her – all over her.

It felt—
How
could
he explain it? It was like nothing he’d ever experienced before.

Marissa leaned forward, kissed his neck,
and slid her arms around his waist.

He felt himself go hard, pushing against
her. He looked into her face, she was smiling, he moved, trying to stop
himself
from pushing her, but she repositioned herself next
to him again.

Perhaps she liked it? Was it turning her
on?

Travis was worried – did she feel
obligated? He didn’t want her that way.

“Are you sure about this?”

She covered his lips with her fingers.
“Sure.” Her fingers slid down his torso, and stopped at his navel. How could he
endure this torture? He kissed her lips, slid his tongue in her mouth. Her
breathing was quickening, her fingers slipped down to his erection. She held
onto him.

“Let’s get out of here,” she whispered.

Travis turned off the water, and reached
for the towel.

He began to dry Marissa, noticing the goose
bumps on her skin.
“Cold?”