Why Men Love Bitches (23 page)
Read Why Men Love Bitches Online
Authors: Sherry Argov
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE #71Don’t always do the same thing over and over in the bedroom. Vary it so that it doesn’t become a predictable routine.
There were just a few miscellaneous comments men had about other things that put them off. This section may be self-explanatory to some, while others may find these things not so obvious. In any event, since your man is not likely to say these things directly, you might want to make a small mental note of the following:
- “A woman should always keep the bathroom door closed when she’s on the toilet. I think it’s really disgusting to watch a woman on the toilet. And don’t leave feminine pads and stuff around for the guy to look at, either. We don’t even like it when we see douche commercials on TV.”
- “I get a little turned off by a woman who is too materialistic. If she pays attention to what kind of shoes I’m wearing or what kind of watch I have on or what kind of car I drive, I’ll back off.”
- “When a woman is jealous, it can be a turnoff. One time I was on a date and this person with long blonde hair was in the car next to us. My date accused me of checking her out. It turned out to be a guy!”
- “Mystery is important. I was on the phone with a woman and the first time we spoke she said that she was going to lose weight so we could have sex. How much does a guy need to be talked into having sex?”
- “I don’t like a woman who doesn’t have a life, or a job. Or messed-up credit. Or an old boyfriend who’s a nut case. I like a woman who is responsible.”
- “I like a woman I can see without any pressure involved. If a guy is under a lot of pressure and she adds to it, he’ll immediately shut down.”
- “I don’t like it when a woman makes me look bad in front of people. If I do something wrong, she should bring it up at home.”
- “When he walks in the door after a long day, let him do his own thing for a half-hour. Acknowledge his presence and give him a kiss and don’t immediately drop what you need on him.”
- “A woman shouldn’t let a guy know she is centering her world around him. One girl told me she spent three hours getting ready to meet me for the first time. That’s a little too much.”
- “The fear every guy has is that after marriage the girl is going to cut her hair off, gain a bunch of weight, and stop putting out.”
- “No woman who wants to be involved with a halfway decent guy should ever get drunk with him. If you’re home drinking and you get a buzz, that’s one thing. If you’re at a bar and you make an idiot of yourself, it’s a total turnoff. No one likes to be with a drunk.”
- “Never let a guy know you’re sitting home waiting for his call, or that he’s your whole life. He also likes knowing other men want you, just as long as you aren’t sleeping with any of them.”
- “When a woman chases you, it will turn you off. I remember when the sorority girls would come over to the fraternities. In a way, I felt like the cows were coming to graze on our turf. It was too easy.”
- “It’s like punching a clock when you’re with a woman who makes you feel like you have to report back to her. That’s an instant turnoff.”
- “A woman should never show up
unannounced,
both at a guy’s house or at his work. He’ll instantly think of her as a ‘fatal attraction’ type.”
Women are almost brainwashed since kindergarten that they should be
nice
. Just think about the nursery rhyme that says girls are made of “sugar and spice and everything
nice
.” Pop culture does not encourage women to be feisty, so women get the idea that being nice, and agreeable is the winning ticket. It’s good to be nice. It’s when a woman feels she has to be nice independent of how she is treated that there’s a problem. It often means the woman is nice at the expense of being self-abnegating.
As you’ve read throughout these chapters, a man will often be turned off by a woman who
doesn’t
stand her ground. When you read the following quotes, this message should come full circle, since now you will be hearing it directly from men: They are secretly turned on by a bitch, or a woman who
will
stand up for herself. At this point we are getting to the meat and potatoes of the “Other Team’s Secret Playbook.” Here’s where men—in their own words—disclose why they are turned on by bitches. This is one of their best-kept secrets of all.
1. “When you banter with a woman and she can give it right back to you, it’s a turn-on.”
2. “I like a woman who can put me in my place. If I’m being a jerk and she brings it to my attention, it makes me respect her.”
3. “The childlike qualities in us [men] propel us to try to take advantage. It’s a good thing to know the woman you love won’t put up with it.”
4. “Yes, I admit it. Sometimes I start a fight with my wife. It isn’t that I deliberately want to give her a hard time; it’s just that sometimes I have a hard day and misery loves company. When she puts me in my place, it makes me respect her.”
5. “I like a woman who won’t play games. Her confidence says that she must know something I don’t. Then I say to myself, ‘Hey, she
must be
worth keeping.’”
6. “When a woman is always really sweet and nice, it can become monotonous.”
7. “If a guy thinks a woman is stupid, he won’t take her attention that seriously because he doesn’t respect her opinion. If she’s really smart and appears to have her act together, I am more flattered that she wants to be with me. I feel like I have something of value.”
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE #72Most men tend to disrespect a woman who appears to be too
malleable.
8. “When you try to get away with doing something you know isn’t right and a woman says, ‘I don’t have time for that,’ it can be a turn-on. It depends on the situation, but I like a woman who has the integrity to stand by what she believes.”
9. “She is so sexy to me when she has that spiciness about her. She isn’t afraid to disagree or tell me what she thinks. She doesn’t always kiss my ass and that keeps me on my toes.”
10. “She didn’t take anything lying down. I complained at the time, but I admit this turned me on.”
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE #73Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself or speak your mind. It will not only earn his respect, in some cases it will even turn him on.
11. “I like a woman to put me in my place, if I know I deserve it. What is sexy is when a woman is comfortable enough with her own power. Or when she isn’t so timid or afraid to rock the boat.”
12. “A man respects a woman who won’t tolerate being treated badly.”
13. “I treat women as equals, so I like to compete in a fun way with my wit. I like a woman who mentally challenges me in a fun way by bantering with me, or with her sense of humor. It can be competitive in a playful kind of way.”
14. “I actually like a woman with a little bit of a temper. Because then I know she won’t let me take advantage of her. Pride is sexy.”
15. “A woman who is feisty is sexually stimulating. You assume she’ll be wilder. With a nice girl, you are afraid she’ll run home and tell her mommy what you did to her.”
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE #74Men often automatically assume that a bitchier woman will be more assertive in bed, and that a nice girl will be more timid.
Since men are so good at hiding the way they feel, a woman often wonders how she can tell whether a man is in love with her or just “going through the motions.” Here is the most important thing to remember when asking yourself this question: If you have to second-guess whether he loves you, and you’ve been together for a very long time, you might be settling for less.
What the men shared with me is that it’s often the little things a man will do for a woman that are most telling.
- “You know a guy’s in love when it’s a Monday night and she says, ‘Why don’t we do this?’ and he does. He’s in love when he starts to regularly pick her over his friends.”
- “When he seems to be overjoyed. Suddenly he’s really happy and he seems different. When he suddenly appears more alive to his friends and family.”
- “You know a guy is ‘in deep’ when he’ll let the girl keep feminine stuff in the house. Suddenly he’s proud to have feminine decor. He’ll buy the furniture that she likes. And he’ll let her keep tampons under his sink. He’ll want her in his life in every way.”
- “He’ll start taking better care of himself, and he’ll start to think about long term. Financially, physically, and in every other way.”
- “He’ll go out of his way [for her]. He’ll fly to see her. If she has a craving, he’ll get out of bed to get her a doughnut in the middle of the night.”
- “Men are into variety until they fall madly in love. If he really wants one woman, it doesn’t matter who else he can have because he wants to be with
her
. Other women aren’t a threat when he’s attached. A lot of temptations go away when you really fall hard.” - “When he thinks about her all the time, when he does thoughtful things for her, or when he’s always thinking of ways to please her.”
- “Suddenly, he feels like he can stop looking around the corner for someone else.”
- “When he’s willing to do something out of character to please her. He never thought of having children or getting married, but with this woman he is willing to do all of the above.”
- “She won’t have to ask. She’ll just know it in her gut.”