Whatever It Takes (Second Chances #2) (16 page)

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

tess

M
y plan was to work my regular shift the whole week and bank all my tips because I wasn’t going to worry about rent or power or anything except what I needed to get somewhere else. Mia, one of the girls at the club, even knew someone who could get me a new ID. Then Noah and I would take off.

The ache that had been a permanent thing since I made my decision got worse.

Walking away from Ryan was going to be the hardest part of all this.

But it wasn’t like he was looking for happily ever after. We were having fun and for a little while, he’d made me feel like me again. I’d never forget that. Never forget him.

“You are on fire tonight, girl,” Mia said. “Actually, this whole damned place is. I can’t keep up.” She laughed. “Get it? Keep it up.” She winked and I laughed. I had to agree with her—the testosterone in this place tonight was off the charts.

The boss had hired some high-profile porn star to do a cameo this week, which couldn’t have been better timing. The place was packed, and it should stay that way all week.

I’d been there for two hours and already made about a hundred and fifty, and there was still a line out the door. With any luck I might have over a grand when I left in four days. It wasn’t a lot but would get us away from the city. Away from my father.

There was very little time for small talk, so I worked my ass off all night, mixing drinks and smiling and flirting. Every time I stuck money in my tip jar I grinned. This was the best I’d felt since I left the prison yesterday.

Because I had a plan and it was going to work.

My father thought he won, but the joke was going to be on him. A great big screw-you to the man who had controlled my life for the last time.

By the time my shift ended, my feet and back were aching and I had half a dozen phone numbers on napkins tucked into my tip jar. As if. When the last customer left and the girls started cleaning up, I wiped down the bar and pulled the cash out of the jar.

When I was done counting it, my jaw was on the floor. Six hundred and twenty-seven dollars. That’s more than I usually made in a week. I tucked the envelope into my purse with a grin and headed toward the door.

“Hey, Darla,” Mia called out. I swung around and she hurried over. “You forget something, girlie?”

Shit, did I not do something?

Mia held out another envelope. “You forgot your take of our tips. You did great tonight, by the way. I didn’t know one human could mix that many drinks for that many people.”

I took the envelope with shaking fingers. In my excitement I’d totally forgotten the girls gave me 10 percent of their tips too. This was going to work. I threw my arms around Mia.

“Thank you.”

She hugged me back, then gave me the side eye. “You have a few of those drinks you were mixing? You’ve been getting a cut since day one.”

“Just a good night,” I said with a grin. “See you tomorrow.”

“’Night, crazy girl.”

Jesse walked me to the parking lot and said good night. I drove home with a smile on my face. If I could make the same kind of money all week, then Noah and I could go practically anywhere. I’d always wanted to see Maine. Noah would love the snow in the winter.

Would Ryan like the snow?

I shook my head. It didn’t matter. He could never know where we were. Heaviness settled in my chest as I walked up to my apartment. I had only a few more days with him. That realization nearly sent me to my knees.

I loved him.

Had never stopped.

And I had to walk away from him again.

B
y the end of my shift Thursday night, I was floating on air. I had made over three thousand dollars the past two days thanks to the boss’s publicity stunt with the porn star. But the best and worse part was that tonight, I would get to see Ryan.

Maybe for the last time.

It was bittersweet, this financial victory, because it brought me one step closer to being able to leave. I headed up the steps to my apartment with a heavy heart. I wished things could be different. Wished that my life wasn’t on the verge of collapsing or that Ryan wasn’t the kind of guy to settle down with even if I had all my shit together.

I shoved my key in the door. Ryan would be there any minute and I couldn’t stop my pulse from leaping at the thought.

“Tess?”

I spun around with a squeak and found Ryan already at the top step as if I had conjured him out of thin air.

“I didn’t mean to scare you. God, it feels like fucking forever since I got to do this . . .” He stepped closer and his finger nudged my chin until I looked up. His eyes, dark brown pools of simmering passion, looked down at me and I swallowed against the lump forming. His intense gaze left me breathless, like I’d run a marathon, and my lips parted to catch any bit of air available.

His head lowered slowly and the feathery-light touch tickled the sensitive flesh of my lips before his warm tongue traced a slow path across them, stopping in the middle to nip my bottom lip between his teeth. The playful bite sent a shiver of desire racing up my spine.

I gasped into his mouth.

His hand tangled into my hair and held firmly as his mouth claimed mine, his tongue sinking between my lips and stroking the warm, wet recesses until I could do nothing but kiss him back with abandon.

Our tongues clashed, danced, and fought for dominance. Tonight I wasn’t giving an inch. If I had to leave him again, I wanted to remember this night for the rest of my life. I pulled away, gasping for breath. Every fiber in my body was electrified. With so little time left, I wanted all of him.

“I need to shower,” I said between kisses. “I could use a back washer.”

“Fuck yes,” he growled.

He was wrapped around me when I opened the door and slipped inside. Louisa was sitting on the couch and she smiled at us.

“He went down around nine and haven’t heard a peep. I’ll leave you two alone.” She grinned at us before letting herself out.

“God, I thought she’d never leave,” Ryan said. His mouth was hot on my shoulder and he reached around to unfasten the hooks that held the corset closed in the front.

“I’m not wearing a . . .” The leather fell to the floor.

“You are going to kill me.” Ryan cupped my breasts and ran his thumb over the tips. “And I will die a happy man.”

I arched and pressed my entire back to his front. His teeth nipped at my neck and I groaned. “Shower.”

“In a minute. I need to help you out of your work clothes.” He ran his fingers down my ribs before bringing them together just above the edge of my jeans. His lips made a path down my spine that almost sent me to my knees.

“Ryan.” I moaned low, and he slowly turned me around and then sank to his knees.

When he pressed his lips right above one hip, I threaded my fingers in his hair. He undid the button and lowered the zipper, pressing kisses on the skin he revealed. My breath caught.

It seemed to take him an hour to peel my jeans down to where my boots kept him from going farther. I gripped his shoulders when he unzipped them and tugged them off. Before I could get my balance, he had my jeans off too. I stood there in nothing but a pair of black lace panties.

“You are so amazingly beautiful.” He kissed both hips, then I felt his hot breath right between my legs. Even through the thin fabric, I felt his hot tongue moving over me. It wasn’t enough and he moved away too soon so that he stood in front of me now.

Heat still pulsed from the point of his brief contact and desire curled up my body. When he lifted my hand and took the tip of my finger into his mouth, scraping his teeth along the sensitive underside, a shudder racked my body.

His eyes were burning and I couldn’t look away. What I thought I saw there should have made my heart soar, but instead, the ache in my chest made it hard to take a breath.

When he cupped my jaw, I tilted my head into his hand.

“Tess . . . I need to tell you . . .”

I stood on my tiptoes and pressed my mouth against his. He could not say anything because it would change nothing. I slid my fingers down his arm and pulled him toward the bathroom.

While he was taking off his clothes I started the water and lit a couple of candles so we could turn off the harsh overhead light. With everything bathed in the soft glow, it was magical. This was what I wanted to remember. Ryan. Just like this.

He was completely naked and magnificent. Hard corded muscles ran down his arms and legs. Grooves on the side of his hips pointed right between his legs where his cock was hard and ready and beautiful.

We’d had sex before this, but I knew tonight was more than that.

Tonight was about love. And goodbye.

It made everything more important. I tried to catalog every detail because I never wanted to forget this night. I crooked a finger under the waistband of my panties and pulled them down. Then I reached up and tugged the elastic bands from my hair, one then the other. I shook my head, savoring the relief in my scalp.

My sigh was answered by a groan. We both stood naked, staring at each other, and the anticipation made my skin buzz. It took only a step and he was in front of me again. His mouth lowered over mine, possessive and demanding. His tongue stroked the inside of my mouth and fresh desire exploded over me, reigniting into a fury of intense need. I returned the kiss with my own urgency. His body pressed harder into mine and his cock pressed against my stomach.

Steam from the shower filled the room and covered our bodies with a thin layer of moisture.

I scraped my nails lightly over the muscles in his back. He groaned into my mouth and deepened the kiss, pushing against me slowly until I felt the edge of the tub on my calves. I stepped inside and felt the flow of hot water down my back.

“God, you taste good,” he said, following me in.

As if to prove it, he caught my lip between his teeth and bit down lightly, tugging on the kiss-swollen flesh. He somehow managed to turn me around so that my back was against his front.

The shower was small and with Ryan in there with me, I could barely move. But I didn’t need to. With him pressing against me in the back and the hot water running between us, it was perfect.

“Do you know how many nights I stood in my shower, thinking about you and getting myself off?” he asked against my neck.

If I’d had the room, I would have melted into a puddle.

His hand ran down my water-slickened stomach and settled between my legs. I let my head fall forward and rest on the shower wall. He moved my hair aside and kissed the back of my neck. When his fingers slipped inside me I groaned.

“I never want to stop touching you,” he said. “You are so perfect, Tess. So goddamned perfect for me.”

I cried out, partly from what his fingers were doing to me and partly because of what he’d said. I wanted to be so much more for him, but I couldn’t. And the pain of that knowledge mixed with the explosive pleasure he was pushing me toward.

“Ryan,” I moaned.

“Let go, Tess.”

I leaned my head back against his shoulder and closed my eyes. Lights danced behind my eyelids and the tension inside grew tighter. Tears filled my eyes and seeped out from the lids. The water washed them away immediately.

“Come for me, baby,” Ryan said.

I shattered. My mouth fell open and I gasped in shallow breaths and the tension peaked and exploded into a million shiny pieces. Ryan tightened his arms around my waist and kept moving his fingers, keeping me from finding myself again for a very long minute.

“God, I could watch you do that over and over again. But right now, I need to be inside you.” His hands slid over my wet skin and he guided me out of the shower.

The edge of the counter was cold against my ass and I gasped. Ryan grabbed the towel off the rack and laid it behind me, then he tugged my arms around his neck.

“Hold on to me, beautiful,” he said, pressing his hot mouth against my throat.

I did and he lifted me up and set my ass on the edge of the sink. The height of it put me exactly where I needed to be to fit against him perfectly.

I wrapped my legs around his hips and he groaned when his cock slid against my wet skin.

“You are so fucking perfect, Tess,” he mumbled, staring down between us. He traced a path of water droplets over my shoulder to the tip of my breast.

“Ryan, please.” I shifted a little closer and moved my hips back and forth.

He gritted his teeth and the air hissed out from between them. “You are killing me.” But he reached down and grabbed his jeans and pulled out a condom. He had it opened and on faster than my desire-filled mind could comprehend.

When I felt the tip of him nudging between my legs, I tightened my grip on his neck and slid to the very edge of the counter. I dug my heels into the back of his thighs and let my head fall back when he slid all the way inside, filling me.

“Fuck,” he gasped.

I answered with my own nonsensical words because he had started moving.

“Lean back as far as you can,” he urged. His fingers dug into my hips and held me steady, so I let go and braced my hands on the edges of the counter. Then I leaned back until I felt the mirror at the back of my head.