Tickle His Pickle: Your Hands-On Guide to Penis Pleasing (8 page)

Tunes.
Pre-load your perfect mood music in the CD or MP3 player.Then simply press
play
when the moment’s right.

Scent.
Try a light lavender spritz, scented candles or incense to create a magical scent in the room.

Food.
If a romantic meal is on the menu, forgo heavy dishes that weigh you down, and gassy foods that bloat you up.

Bath Prep.
If waterplay is in the picture, draw a bubblebath or ready the shower. Set out a fresh loofah, sensually scented gels and the waterproof vibrator.

Aural Aphrodisiacs

What’s the dirtiest thing you ever moaned during sex? If “the lampshade needs dusting” ever crossed your lips, here’s a better way to open the pipeline directly into his pleasure center: erotic talking.

sadie Sez:

Things your guy LOVES to hear.
These phrases are going to sound awfully silly if you’re reading this in a store. But they’re going to sound awfully hot when you say any one of these to your guy in the heat of passion.

Does that feel good, baby?

Do you like when I touch myself here?

I’ll do anything for you.

I love your dick in my mouth.

Your touch makes me so hot

Do you want it faster, softer, tighter... ?

You make me so wet

Please come all over me.

You feel so good inside me.

Mmmmm, you taste good.

Remember:
if you’re feeling it, say it. Keep it short and breathy. How you say it can be just as important as what you say.And be sure to say the sexiest thing of all: his name.

If talking during sex is new to you—or you feel a bit self-conscious-remember that it’s perfectly okay because everything you say is just between the two of you. Once you break the sound barrier, you’ll discover that dirty talk can be truly liberating. More than just a big turn-on—you also find out what each of you likes.

Ease into it.
Lightly brush your lips against his ear, and softly whisper how good you feel when he touches you.

Try sounds instead of words.
Moans,
mmmms,
ohhhs and
ahhhs-even
the noises of kissing, breathing, licking and sucking—are sexy to the ear.

Try words together with sounds.
Tell him in a breathy voice what you’re about to do to him.
“I’m going to take you in my mouth,”
If you feel like you’re doing all the talking, ask him a non-yes-or-no question about what he wants you to do, like,
“Where do you want me to lick you now?”

Honesty is your best aphrodisiac.
Say you’re hot when you’re hot; wet when you’re wet; coming when you’re coming. Score extra erotic points by breathlessly saying his name.
“Do you want to watch me touch myself
,
Richard?”
You can even pour out one of your sexual fantasies. Remember, he wants to know.

Look Delicious

Guys are visual creatures.They love to watch action sports, action movies, action television and you—in action.

Your guy is already looking lustily at you during sex. But are you self-consciously covering up, or giving him an erotic eyeful. The less shy you are, the more turned on he’ll be.

You can hold him spellbound simply by putting yourself in his visual crosshairs.Try any of these suggestions and enjoy your own visual feast watching how turned-on he’ll be:

Dress seductively.
Whether his fantasy is slinky lingerie, leather Biker Chick or Ze French Maid, wear your costumes proudly. Even better, buy them too tight so your breasts appear like they’re about to fall out! Now do a strip tease for him.

Touch yourself.
Pinch your nipples, squeeze your breasts, suck your finger, run your hands through your hair. It’ll feel good to you-and look great to him.

Strike a pose.
You know your greatest assets. Position yourself to show them off! Let him see you’re playful and confident—and that you know what he likes.

Live in the moment.
Let your body language speak for you-your glistening skin, erotic expressions, luscious lips, arched back, thrusting hips.When he sees you’re turned on, he’ll be even more turned on.

Pleasure yourself.
There are few sights sexier to a guy than to watch his woman masturbate for him.The sight of you touching your beautiful vagina will send your guy out of his mind.

Eyes Wide Open

Would you like to knock your guy’s socks off so far, they’ll wash, dry and fold themselves, too? Then take a deep breath, open up your mind, and consider this:

Adult videos.

Gulp! If you’re like many women, you instantly flashed back to cheesy porn scenes from the ‘70’s, featuring gross guys with caveman body hair doing sexual acrobatics to the world’s funkiest soundtrack.

Before you say,“two thumbs down,” hear me out.

Times have changed. Some of today’s productions, while certainly not Hollywood blockbusters, have now become higher quality entertainment, featuring sexier, more appealing actors who may easily arouse your interest, too.

But why should you watch adult videos? It’s what your guy wants.

Most every guy I’ve ever met will jump at the chance to watch an adult video with his lover. Even if he’s never said it out loud, your guy is no exception (and if he is, he’ll tell you).

Want proof? Next time you’re lying in bed, say in a soft,
innocent tone, “I’m a little curious to watch an adult video with you.”
If he doesn’t immediately kiss you on the lips—or on the feet—it’s because he’s too busy thanking his lucky stars to be with such a giving and generous lover.

Getting Past “Gross!”

Has your guy ever skipped hanging out with his buddies or missed a big football game just to go with you to an unmanly event? Could it be your turn to try something he really wants—especially if it ultimately brings
you
pleasure? Here’s how to ease any anxiety.

Start with an open mind.
There’s nothing to be intimidated by, not a thing to be jealous about, no one you’re being compared to. This is just for your own private viewing pleasure on a two-dimensional TV screen that can be switched off at the touch of a button.

Sadie Sez: