The Girl Before Eve (6 page)

“I guess…I just hate that your first time was…
just
nice. I’m sorry, Lily. It should have been better. You didn’t even…you know.” He looked awkward as he hugged her tight.
That’s because you didn’t even try
. She searched for the right words, but none came, so she just hugged him back. “It’ll be better next time. I promise.”
There won’t be a next time.

♥♥♥

Saturday morning arrived and presented Lily with the throbbing head usually associated with the over indulgence of alcohol. Elliot had dropped her off at her room at one o’clock in the morning after she had ended up consuming too much of the rancid tasting, brown liquid that Jacko was passing off as beer. She had drunk the vile concoction solely to rid herself of the memory of what she had done.

After giving up their bar work for the summer, she and Adam had vowed to go job hunting again, and Saturday was supposed to be the day. It had been arranged for a while, but they hadn’t confirmed things, so she was surprised when there was a knock on the door while she lay there feeling like someone had carpeted her tongue with shag pile as she’d slept. She clambered out of bed dressed only in an old, faded, oversized Ramones T-shirt that had once belonged to Adam.

“Morning!” he trilled as she opened the door. His greeting was quickly followed by a sharp intake of breath. “Shit you look rough. What happened?” He pushed in and plonked himself down on her unmade bed.

“Beer and loud music.” She yawned and stretched her arms over her head.

Adam suddenly averted his eyes. “Er, Lily, I know we’re best friends and all, but all you have on under that T-shirt is a pair of flimsy knickers. I
am
a bloke you know.”

She dropped her arms quickly and felt the heat rise in her cheeks. “Whoops, sorry.” She cringed, grabbed a pair of yoga pants, and pulled them on as quickly as she could. “So, how did your first official date with Eve go?”
Not that I actually want to know.

A grin spread across his handsome features. “Oh, Lil, it was fantastic. We kissed.”

Her heart sank a little but she forced a smile. “Oh great. That’s really…great.”

He frowned, causing a familiar crease between his brows. “How was your night? Did you go to that house party?”

“I did…it was really…yeah…good. Elliot’s really sweet.”

He laughed coldly. “Sweet? That’s not a word I would’ve associated with him. Just be careful okay? He’s the kind of guy who you don’t want to be handing yourself over to. I…I don’t trust him.”

She pulled her brow into a frown and gasped. “You don’t even know him, Adam. You can’t say things like that.” She folded her arms across her braless chest defiantly.

“Look, like I just said, I’m a bloke. I know what he’s after. And I just don’t think you should go giving
it
to
him
.”

She felt the heat rising in her cheeks again and her hands fisted on her hips. “Yeah…well…that’s…you…it’s…it’s none of your business who I…” She shook her head as she stumbled over her words, the right ones evading her completely.

His mouth fell open and his cheeks coloured. “Please tell me you didn’t?”

She turned her back on him and folded her arms once again. “Didn’t what? I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He blew out a long breath as if he was trying to calm a rage. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet and controlled. “You know exactly what I’m talking about. Tell me you didn’t sleep with him.” They had always agreed it was better to wait until you were in love before you gave yourself to someone. Adam was very old fashioned that way and Lily had always thought it very sweet. She could almost feel his eyes boring into her back.

Her cheeks warmed as though they would burst into flames at any second. She had never been able to lie to Adam. Not successfully. She swung around to face him and narrowed her eyes. “Well, Adam, what I
can
confirm is that there wasn’t any
sleeping
involved.”
Shutupshutupshutup! Not helping yourself!

He stood and walked over to her, his fists clenched at his sides, and a pained look had taken over his usually warm eyes. “You didn’t?” She remained stoic. He dragged his hands through his hair and groaned as if she had kicked him. “Oh fuck, Lily, why? What did you do that for? Do you have feelings for
him
? Seriously? Fucking Pippy Longstocking?” The pain in his eyes turned to disappointment and he shook his head.

She gritted her teeth. “His name is Elliot Longthorne, Adam, and it is
none
of your business. So I had sex? So what? I enjoyed it.” She lied. Her words were meant to hurt him as the anger both at herself
and
Adam bubbled to the surface. “It was great and I’ll be doing a lot more of it with or without your blessing. I’m an adult. Remember? Now if you’re going to stand there being all judgmental, then I suggest you fuck off out of my room!” she shouted pointing to the door.

He shook his head as he turned and walked out, slamming the door behind him. She let out an angry guttural scream and punched her mattress.

Chapter Six

Everybody’s Gotta Learn Sometime
(The Korgis)

November 2000 – Edinburgh University

Adam and Lily didn’t speak for over a month after her admission she had slept with Elliot. Adam had no right to be angry or disappointed, and he knew this when he thought rationally about it. But it didn’t stop the rage from bubbling inside him every time he thought of her giving herself to the lanky streak of piss so freely. What made things worse is that the relationship she had run headlong into fell apart soon after they’d had sex, just like Adam knew it would. He wanted to comfort her but his stubbornness wouldn’t allow it, and so it fell to Eve to be Lily’s shoulder to cry on. Not that there had actually
been
any crying apparently.

“So…what did she say at lunch?” Adam asked as he and Eve sat in his uncharacteristically tidy room after walking back together once lectures had finished for the day.

Eve sighed and furrowed her brow. “I wish you two would just
talk
, for goodness sake. You’re both adults and I shouldn’t have to be your go between. When I speak to her it’s all
Is Adders still mad? Has he said anything?
And then I come to you and get the same.” She hit him with a cushion.

Adam huffed. “I know, I know…seriously though…how is she?”

Eve rolled her eyes and placed a hand on his face. “She’s angry as hell at
you
but loves you to bits and hates all this angst between you.”

“Is she upset about Pippy?”

She pushed his arm. “You need to stop calling him that. No, she’s not upset. They parted because…well…look just speak to her.”

Adam sat upright. “Because of what? Please tell me Eve. You’re worrying me.”

“Look, she only slept with him to see what it was like. He turned her on and she wanted to try it. But when it came down to it, he wanted a relationship, and…well
she
didn’t. Simple as that.”

“Really? So
she
ended it?”

“Pretty much, Adam, yes.” She kissed his nose.

“And you believe that?” Adam couldn’t.

Eve rolled her eyes. “Of course, I believe her. I have no reason not to. Look, can I ask you something?”

He snuggled into her neck and kissed her. “Anything,” he mumbled.

“Why are you
really
so wound up about her sleeping with him?”

He stopped his ministrations and pulled back to look into her eyes. He huffed again and ran a hand through his hair. “I told her dad I’d watch out for her. I feel like I’ve let him down. She should’ve waited until she was in love. She should’ve let it be special. She deserves that, Evie.”

“But, Adam, she’s not
your
responsibility. You need to let her breathe. You can’t protect her forever.”

“Look, can we please stop talking about her? You and I are what matters here. Not my stubborn arsed friend.” He gently caressed her lower lip with his thumb. Leaning in to kiss her, he lowered her back on the bed and deepened the kiss. Her hands found his hair and she moaned into his mouth.

All this talk of sex had got Adam thinking. He had been seeing Eve for around six weeks. He hadn’t tried to take things further. He respected her and wanted their first time to be special, not rushed at some stupid, alcohol fuelled house party. The most they had done is kiss and touch a little. She turned him on just by the way she returned his kisses and grasped his hair. Her moans of pleasure almost sent him over the edge on more than one occasion.

He moved his mouth to her neck, nibbling and sucking at her tender skin, getting the reaction he loved so much. Her fingers gripped his hair harder.

He wanted her.

Desperately.

His every waking thought now had Eve’s smiling eyes and beautiful face slap bang in the middle of it. But he would only take the next step for love. His mouth stopped moving. His head snapped up and his eyes met hers. Their blue depths were filled with lust but there was more there. The realisation hit him like a ton of falling textbooks. He
loved
her. He really,
really
loved her.
Shit. I’m actually in love
. Suddenly he sat up and pulled away. The worry that he saw flash in her eyes momentarily melted his heart but he lowered his gaze. Fear coursed through his veins riding on the back of the adrenalin.

She touched her lips. “Adam…what is it? What’s wrong?”

He turned to her and touched her cheek. “Nothing…I’m fine honestly.”

Her cheeks coloured rose-red. “Did I do something wrong?” Her voice wavered as she spoke.

Shaking his head vehemently, he smiled. “No…not at all. I…I need to tell you something, but I’m scared you’ll run a mile.”

She backed away from him. “Oh God, Adam, what is it? You’re really scaring me.” Her eyes had become glassy and her lower lip trembled.

Clearly she feared the worst.

He pulled himself along the bed toward her. “Hey, stop.” He took her hands in his. “It’s nothing bad. I just don’t know if it’s the right time… I’m scared, Eve.” He looked into her azure eyes trying to communicate his feelings so that she would understand.

“Just tell me…please.”

He closed his eyes for a second, trying to conjure up some courage to say how he felt whilst terrified he was about to blow everything. Focusing on her once again, he took a deep breath. “Eve…I…I’m in love with you… I love you.”

A tear escaped her eye and his heart sank. She didn’t feel the same and he’d just ruined everything. He sat upright pulling his hands away and looked down at them where they twisted in his lap. He closed his eyes again as he felt the bed dip. She was leaving. He couldn’t bear to watch her leave, and so he kept his eyes closed tight. He listened for the door but was greeted with nothing but a shuffling sound.

When he finally dared to open his eyes, he looked up and his breath caught. She stood before him completely naked. It was the most beautiful sight he had ever be held. Her golden blonde hair tumbled over her shoulders and caressed her round, pert breasts. The tight pink buds beckoned for his touch as he raked his eyes slowly over her flawless skin. His hungry eyes followed the curve of her waist to her hip, and the soft hair at the junction of her thighs brought a gasp. He swallowed past the lump lodged in his throat. Blinking up at her he opened his mouth to speak, but she reached and pulled his hand so that he was standing before her.

She lifted her hand to cup his cheek. “Adam…I love you too.”

Relief washed over him and he thought his heart might burst with this new realisation. He leaned to kiss her, and stroking his fingertips down her bare back, he felt her shiver under his touch.

Anxious that he had somehow made her feel pressured, he said, “Evie, we don’t have to do this now. I’m so happy that you feel the same, but we can wait. I’m not Elliot. I’m happy to wait.” He kissed her again and his arousal betrayed the words he had uttered.

She pulled away and looked into his eyes. “Adam, I don’t want to try to plan for this to be perfect. I don’t want to put pressure on either of us by saying we’ll do this on that day, in that place… I want to give you this gift now. I want to make love with you, Adam, please?”

He inhaled sharply as he looked down at her. “But I want it to be perfect and what if it’s not?”

She smiled her usual breath-taking smile. “What makes it perfect is that it’s me and you. We have all the time in the world to perfect things. We’ll learn. But tonight we have all night. I’ve never done this before and although I don’t know for sure about you I get the feeling that, whilst you have probably got some experience in other ways that maybe you’ve never done this either?”

“No…never. I’ve just never felt enough for anyone to go that far.” He felt the heat rise in his cheeks at the admission. He wanted to be the experienced one. He wanted to rock her world and make her see stars but felt disappointed in himself. On the other hand it dawned on him that they were about to share this most intimate and special thing with each other.

She pulled at his T-shirt and discarded it on the floor. She was braver than he gave her credit for. Always assuming she would be the shy one, he realised he was wrong as he allowed her to unfasten the button on his faded jeans and slide them down his legs, taking the boxers with them. His arousal sprang forth and she bit her lip as she gazed upon it. He was glad she had no one to compare him to. At least he didn’t have to fear he wasn’t enough for her.

He pulled her into an embrace, his hands in her hair as he tilted her up for a long, deep kiss. Never in all his twenty years had he been more aroused or more in awe. Of course he had looked at magazines. He was a young man after all. But Eve truly was a sight to behold. And she was for his eyes only. He stepped back toward the bed, taking her with him. They lay down together and gazed into each other’s eyes.

She giggled nervously. “Okay…now I’m scared.”

He kissed her tenderly. “Me too…I want to please you so much. I want to make you feel amazing but—”