The Girl Before Eve (25 page)

He climbed out of his car and made his way toward the woman. She was rather tiny, he’d forgotten just how tiny.

She smiled when she saw him approaching and pointed at him questioningly. “Adam?”

He smiled at her as warmly as he could manage. “Jessica.”

She held out her hand to him. “Please…call me Jess. All my friends do.”

He shook her hand. “You can still call me Adam…my friends call me it because well…it’s quite hard to shorten Adam… I’ll stop talking now.” Heat rushed his cheeks.
Fucking knob
. Jessica seemed to be trying her best not to giggle at him. She was very pretty. He liked her instantly.

Clearing his throat, he opened the door for her. “So, are we eating or just having coffee or something, seeing as we’re both driving?”

“Well, I’m starving, so food is good.”

He smiled.
She must not find me repugnant then. Good start.
“Great. I’m hungry, too. I only had a pastry for lunch.”

“At least you had lunch! I only managed a cup of coffee.”

They stood in the doorway waiting to be seated. “How come?”

“Oh, I’ve been helping my sister move into a flat with her boyfriend today.”

“Right…right…how old is your sister?”

“She’s twenty-one. But they were childhood sweethearts so…”

They were shown to a secluded, romantic table toward the back of the restaurant. He pulled out her chair and she thanked him, smiling sweetly. The waiter came over and reeled off a list of specials and handed them menus and a wine list. They both shook their heads at the wine list. Adam liked that.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

She’s My Best Friend
(Lou Reed)

Once their food was ordered, Adam and Jessica sat in a shy silence. He glanced up and met with a curious gaze.

Jessica blushed when he caught her watching him. She leaned forward. “Can I ask you a very straight forward question?”

He cringed and fiddled with his napkin. “Hmmm, if I say no you’ll think I’m an arse but if I say yes I may not want to answer…tricky…go on then.” He held his breath.

“Why did you attend the singles night?”
Okay that was direct
.

He cleared his throat. “Erm, my friend, Lily…my best friend actually, signed me up to an online dating website, but I didn’t feel right doing things that way. It’s like that woman said last night…better to meet people face to face straight off.”

Jessica narrowed her eyes. “You have a female best friend?”

He chuckled. “Why does everyone seem so surprised by that?”

She tilted her head to one side. “Do you and she have history?”

“Well, considering I’ve known her since primary school, yes, we have a hell of a lot…why do you ask?”

She shook her head. “No, I mean a history in the romantic sense not just
history
-history.”

He began to feel uncomfortable and fidgeted in his seat. “No…and don’t take this the wrong way, but why is that in any way relevant? It’s not really any of your business.”

She blushed again. “I’m sorry…look…I’ll tell you why, Adam. My last boyfriend was supposedly in love with me. We went out for four years, but I still found him in bed with his female
best friend
.” She made air quotes with her fingers. “Suffice it to say I’m not a big fan of the whole female best friends thing.”

He puffed out his cheeks on a huff of air. “Well, maybe I’m wasting your time here, Jessica.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Lily and I are very close. She’s my best friend and she helped me through a very rough time last year.” He glanced up to see Jessica listening intently. Perhaps explaining things would help her to understand
why
he needed Lily in his life. “My…my wife was killed in a…she was… A drunk driver hit her and she was killed instantly.” He struggled to get the words out. It was a long time since he’d had to explain.

Jessica gasped and her hand went to her mouth. “Oh, Adam, I am
so
sorry, that’s terrible. How…awful.” He saw tears forming in her eyes.

“Yes…yes it was.” He swallowed his own emotions down along with the lump that had become lodged in his throat. “Lily was there through the whole thing. When I needed consoling, she was there. When I needed a shoulder, she was there. When I needed a kick up the arse, she delivered the blow. She’s the one who’s been encouraging me to meet someone and get on with my life. And as hard as that is, I’m young and I can’t live in the past. If it wasn’t for Lily, I would probably have jumped from a cliff by now.”

Jessica nodded. “How come you and Lily didn’t get together then? You know…instead of you going to singles nights. She sounds amazing.”

He smiled affectionately as he thought about Lily. “She
is
amazing…but she doesn’t think of me that way.”

“And you?”

Adam narrowed his eyes. “And me what?”

“Do you think of
her
that way?”

He paused for a few moments as he considered her question. “There was a time back before university when I felt…
something
…but it was fleeting and it was clear that she didn’t feel the same, and so I got over it. We both moved on and now we’re family to each other.”

“So you told her how you felt back then? And she said she didn’t feel the same?”

He was getting increasingly frustrated and felt like he was under interrogation. “No… I never mentioned it. I didn’t need to. Look, Jessica, I don’t mean to be rude, but I feel under scrutiny here, or like you’re psychoanalysing me. I don’t understand.”

“Please, just humour me. I’m fragile and uneasy knowing any potential boyfriend… God that sounds so immature…any possible love interest… God that’s even worse… Okay, let’s just say that I’m uncomfortable with your relationship with Lily, and until I feel comfortable I don’t feel able to move forward with you even though I like you. I’m trying to be honest.”

He rubbed his brow again. “But don’t you think this is all a bit intense for a first meeting?”

She sighed. “Yes…yes I do…but I think maybe you and I could get on well, and I need to be honest with you.”

He pulled his lips in between his teeth. “Look, there is nothing other than a strong family bond between me and Lily. I care deeply about her. But I’m not
in love
with her. If that’s not something you can deal with, then perhaps we shouldn’t take this any further.” He frowned.

She took a deep breath. “No…no I think you’ve made it clear that it’s just friendship, but now you probably don’t want to see me again after this.” She looked down at her lap. Just then the waiter brought their meals to the table.

When the waiter left, Jessica slowly lifted her gaze to meet Adams. “I’m right, aren’t I?”

He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, then opened his eyes and smiled. “I can understand your trepidation, but I do like you, so can we just start over?”

A pretty smile spread across her face and she sighed. “Sure. I’d really like that.”

♥♥♥

Adam arrived home at half eleven. He was exhausted. Jessica was lovely but she came with baggage. But then again so did he.

He flopped onto the sofa and flicked on the laptop, which sat on the coffee table. No emails. He thought about it for a moment, but then decided against telling Lily the ins and outs of the date. It would feel strange telling her that he was grilled about his relationship with her. And no doubt Lily would tell him to get rid of the nosey woman.

At the end of the evening Adam and Jessica, or Jess as she had asked him to call her, exchanged phone numbers with a view to seeing each other after her girl’s holiday. Lily would be home the following Saturday, so no doubt he would have plenty to tell her. His phone chirped in his pocket. Opening the message, he smiled to himself.

J: Hi Adam, it’s Jess. Wanted to apologise again for the Spanish Inquisition. Even though I discovered this evening that you are a Monty Python fan, I’m not sure you expected it ;-) See you next week. Xx

He chuckled to himself. Okay…pretty…sweet…matching baggage and a sense of humour, too. This felt rather good.

♥♥♥

Jessica spent a week away on her girl’s holiday but kept in touch with Adam the whole time. They had some long conversations by text message, and he wondered what on earth her friends must think as she lay there on a sun lounger with her phone permanently clutched in her hand.

A: Don’t they think it’s strange that you keep texting me? Isn’t it spoiling your holiday?
Adam enquired.

J: Not at all. They are rather intrigued about the man who has finally captured my attention

A: I’ll bet they are. What have you told them?
He was rather intrigued to know. There was a long pause until he received her reply. He had almost given up hope of an answer when his phone chirped.

J: I have told them that I think perhaps this could be something special. Is that too much info?

Adam’s breath caught. That wasn’t really what he was expecting to hear. He didn’t really know what he thought or felt about her. Their first meeting had been quite intense, and whilst he did find her very attractive, he hadn’t really considered where it was going. But he had asked the question after all, so only he was to blame for opening that can of worms. He hit reply.

A: No that’s fine. Look I have to go out.
He lied.
Will text you later. Try to have some fun with your friends!

Okay, time to let this thing breathe. Too much, too soon, perhaps. He threw his phone on the sofa and switched on the TV. She would be back at the weekend, but it would be too late for them to meet up, and so the next possible time for him to see Jess would be over a week from now. Plenty of time to let her think about the implications of what she had said. Plenty of time for him to get his head around the idea that she clearly thought this was going somewhere.
No pressure. None. None at all. Hmmm.

Chapter Thirty

Achilles Heel
(Toploader)

October 2010

Jess had contacted Adam on the Monday after she had arrived back in the UK from her girl’s holiday. She seemed keen to meet up with him again and they arranged a second date. Adam invited her to come for dinner. He had always enjoyed cooking and had wowed Eve on more than one occasion with his culinary delights. He felt confident that cooking Jess a nice meal was a good plan. Also he felt that being on his own turf might ease the anxiety he felt at seeing her again.

He really liked Jess. She was pretty and had a nice enough figure, if a little thin. She was intelligent and they seemed to have a fair bit in common. The only stumbling block seemed to be Lily. Jess asked a lot of questions about her, and his reassurances, whilst they seemed to work initially, had been failing a little in the build-up to the second date. Her questions had been less subtle and more frequent. Hence the anxiety. He didn’t feel like explaining his relationship with Lily to this woman every time they met. If a relationship became such hard work, then surely it wasn’t worth pursuing.

Everything was prepared. Jess would be here at seven thirty, and so Adam ran up the stairs to shower and dress for her arrival. It felt strange inviting a woman here. It was something he hadn’t envisaged himself doing, but it felt like the best thing to do. He felt like he needed to be at home. Perhaps Eve would be there, in spirit, to give him strength.

He stopped, mid scrub, as that particular errant thought preyed on his mind. What
would
Eve think of all this? Of course it was a moot point really, but what if she
was
still able to watch over him? Would she be angry? Upset? Would she feel betrayed that he was trying to move on with his life after only just over a year? Sometimes he swore he could smell her perfume wafting by him, and he would close his eyes to do his best to capture the moment, to try to feel her presence. But these moments were fleeting. Clinging to a ghost was not how he wanted to spend his life. Eve was gone. He
had
to start to accept it.

Just after seven thirty, there was the anticipated knock at the door. He checked his reflection in the mirror over the fireplace. His hair was getting a little long and unruly but he kind of liked it. He had shaved and dressed in a grey T-shirt and jeans as Lily had suggested.

“You have to look more relaxed, Adders, she’s coming to your home. Let her see you as
you
in your own environment.” Lily’s words rang in his head. She talked as though he was some kind of study and she was David Attenborough or something. He laughed and shook his head.
As long as she doesn’t jump out of the under-stairs cupboard speaking in hushed tones with a camera crew in tow
. Although knowing Lily, anything was possible and she actually did have access to the camera crew. He made his way to the front door and tentatively opened it.

“Hey, Jess, come on in.” He stepped aside to allow her to pass.

“Hi Adam.” She leaned up to kiss his cheek, placing her hand on his chest. He helped her off with her coat and hung it on the peg at the bottom of the stairs. She too had dressed more casually in black trousers and a lilac v-neck sweater. It reminded him of something Eve would wear. A pang of sadness stabbed his heart. He’d begun to feel guilty for bringing Jess here.

She handed him a bottle of wine. “I thought maybe I could get a taxi home…if that’s okay with you?” She looked concerned.

He did his best to smile. “Oh…yeah, sure.”
But you
will
be going home!
He took the wine through to the tiny kitchen with its table for two neatly set out at one end.

“Something smells wonderful, Adam. What have you made?” She closed her eyes as she inhaled.

He reached for a couple of glasses. “I made beef in a red wine sauce. Is that okay?”
Shit, I never even checked if she eats beef. Shitty shit.