The Fear and Anxiety Solution (26 page)

You can argue that by letting go of fear and anxiety you’ve retired from an old identity; therefore, you might be prone to facing a similar crisis. So this chapter and the next provide you with all you need to establish a solid foundation for your new you. Rebuilding is actually the fun part, because you can choose who and how you want to be now that you’ve grown up—or maybe, more aptly put: now that you’ve outgrown your self-limiting identity.

This chapter guides you through the first step of this rebuilding process. You’ll reconnect and realign yourself with the part of you that has always been solid and perfect by nature—your essence. For this alignment to become the strong foundation of your new you, you need to anchor it consciously and subconsciously until it becomes your cellular identity.

As I mentioned earlier, emotions and beliefs are stored not only in our subconscious but also in our cells. For 2,000 years, the concept of
cellular memory
has been an essential part of traditional Chinese medicine.
¹
Recently, cellular memory has also received greater recognition in allopathic medicine and Western science.
²
The role of cellular memory was studied in heart-transplant recipients. In several documented cases, patients experienced puzzling changes in their tastes, preferences, behaviors, emotions, and habits after waking up from surgery; the new traits turned out to be distinctive characteristics of the organ donors. Strikingly, none of the recipients knew anything about the donors prior to noticing changes in themselves, which suggests that those traits were remembered and encoded by the cells of the transplanted organs.
^3
,
4

The exact means by which cells store emotions and memories are still unknown. In his book
The Biology of Belief,
cell biologist Bruce Lipton provides evidence suggesting that the behavior and identity of a cell is to a large extent determined by the interactions between neurotransmitters and cell receptors,
specialized proteins in the cell membrane.
⁵
Neurotransmitters function as messengers between the nervous system and the rest of our body and are released by neurons and some glands, such as the adrenal and pituitary glands. Fear and anxiety cause the secretion of stress hormones—a special group of neurotransmitters that includes epinephrine, norepinephrine, and cortisol—into the bloodstream, where they are able to reach most cells in our bodies. As they bind to specific membrane receptors like keys fitting into their corresponding locks, they initiate distinctive responses and chemical changes within the cells.

Stress hormones mobilize the body’s energy reserves and increase breathing, heart rate, and blood pressure, which allows oxygen-enriched blood to move more rapidly to the brain and muscles. The body is getting ready to manage the source of anxiety by fighting it, running away from it, or as a last resort, playing dead. Stress hormones also stimulate so-called transcription factors that migrate to the cell nucleus and activate specific genes.
⁶
Gene activation leads to the increased production of certain proteins that are required for the cells to respond adequately to the ongoing stress. So when stress hormones travel through the body and activate the cells’ stress responses over and over again, as they do in cases of chronic anxiety, the results can be long-term changes in metabolism, structure, and behavior of cells.
⁷
The cells take on a new identity: “I am stressed and anxious.”

These adaptations to stress and anxiety cannot be sustained without harming the delicate homeostasis of the individual cells and the balance of the entire body. For example, the resulting increase in oxidative stress leads to accumulation of free radicals, which cause stress-related cell damage. Free radicals can injure all components of a cell, including telomeres, which are specific DNA sequences on the end of chromosomes. Telomeres are designed to protect chromosomes from degradation and prevent them from fusing with each other. Research has shown that cells of people suffering from chronic stress have significantly shortened telomeres, which means that these people are at higher risk for accelerated aging, cancer, and autoimmune and heart diseases.
⁸

Another significant way anxiety can affect us on a cellular level is when our cells literally become addicted to it. As cells adapt to the constant stimulation caused by chronic stress, fear, and anxiety, they change their dietary habits. They become so used to being activated and fueled by stress hormones that they may crave these neurotransmitters after we’ve reverted to a calm and relaxed state of mind.

If you think it’s impossible for the body to become addicted to its own hormones and their effects, consider self-proclaimed “stress junkies”—those people who love living on the edge and thrive on such activities as race-car driving, bungee jumping, rock climbing, and then relax with a few hours of “special ops” video gaming. These people often say they need adrenaline rushes (
adrenaline
is another word for epinephrine) to feel alive. Or take avid runners, of which I am one, who can become so dependent on the release of endorphins they experience while running (the “runner’s high”) that they’ll start nervously tapping their feet on the days they can’t get their ten-mile fix.
⁹

If we can develop a physical addiction to drugs, such as alcohol, nicotine, and pain medication, or to the neurotransmitters that are released by thrill-seeking and running, why shouldn’t it be possible for us to also become addicted to anxiety? It’s perfectly conceivable that chronic fear and anxiety make our cells demand their daily dose of stress hormones, as well as endorphins and opioids, which are also released in response to these emotions. There is no scientific proof for this hypothesis, but to my knowledge, it’s never been thoroughly investigated either.

You may have experienced firsthand the effects of these cellular cravings. Everything is stable and peaceful in your life, and then an inner restlessness arises, causing you to search for something to worry about—the devastation of the rainforest or the little bump on your skin that you’ve had for years but now wonder if it might be cancer after all.

This brings me back to my original point. Releasing fear and anxiety in and of itself cannot create
permanent
change on a subconscious and cellular level. You might feel great for a while, but at some point, your subconscious and your cells might undergo an identity crisis or experience drastic withdrawal symptoms because they are still craving stress hormones. Both have been conditioned by fear and anxiety and, therefore, are uncomfortable without these emotions.

So it’s important to replace the old anxiety-driven identity with a new foundation of self at the subconscious and cellular level. This new foundation needs to elicit powerful and positive emotions that prompt the release of other neurotransmitters, such as dopamine and serotonin, which stimulate and recondition your cells to a feeling of calmness and confidence. This way, you will transfer your new identity from your conscious mind to the subconscious and cellular level and thus truly embody it. What better place to start building
your new foundation than with that aspect of you that is already solid and perfect by nature—your essence.

Let’s talk about your essence, the core energy you’ve already gotten in touch with during the Pattern Resolution Process. How do you know that what you’ve seen and felt in your heart is real? This idea of a core essence may appear a bit esoteric and “woo woo.” Believe me, my scientific mind was ruffled by this concept when I first got in touch with my own essence. However, what truly astounded me and confirmed my own experiences was that no matter how open-minded or skeptical my clients were, when I guided them to connect to their essence, the overwhelming majority described sensing it in the same way—as a brilliant light in their heart.

People commonly associate qualities such as love, compassion, goodness, strength, joy, and passion with this core energy. Although some of the news these days might lead you to believe that human behavior is largely defined by greed, self-righteousness, and a disregard of the greater good, there is at least as much evidence testifying to an inherent goodness in all of us. It’s that powerful force that makes us jump into the freezing river to save another human being, or even an animal, from drowning. It’s that natural instinct that drives us to reach out and support each other when disaster strikes, as countless stories described people doing after the events on September 11, Hurricane Katrina, the tsunami in the South Pacific, or the earthquake in Japan. It’s that inner source that rewards selfless service with a deep sense of joy and fulfillment. It’s a place from which we can draw love, compassion, and forgiveness, even for those we don’t know or who hurt us the most. This is our core essence.

The Dalai Lama has pointed out that love and compassion aren’t limited to human beings; they’re also well established in animals. I’ve heard many times from people that the only unconditional love and acceptance they’ve ever known came from their beloved dogs or cats. It was through the adoring gaze of their dogs or the snuggling of their cats that they could pierce through their own lack of self-worth and see themselves as fundamentally good and loveable. There are different degrees and expressions of love and compassion. However, in their purest form—in the form that is unconditional, selfless, and giving—love and compassion generate from a place that goes beyond the conscious and subconscious.

OK, so maybe you still aren’t sure about the goodness of your essence because you haven’t saved anybody’s life, you don’t volunteer, you don’t like pets, and you still can’t forgive your ex. I am sure that you’re being far too hard on yourself. Here’s a way to recognize that you’ve actually been in touch with your pure essence more often than you previously realized.

Take a pen and paper, and write down events of the present and past where you have:

     • Accepted and loved a person or animal without expectations or conditions

     • Forgiven someone out of a sense of kindness and compassion

     • Put your own needs and desires aside and focused solely on another person’s well-being

     • Been completely open and willing to listen, consider, and understand a different point of view

     • Admitted with humility (not shame) that you were wrong

     • Felt touched and inspired by another person’s generosity, patience, acceptance, or selflessness

     • Embraced and appreciated the beauty and the gifts of your life

     • Awakened feeling happy and light for no reason

     • Been in complete peace and harmony with yourself—and the world and people all around you

While you’re revisiting your past, make sure that you’re gentle with yourself. Focus on your potential, and keep in mind that even if these experiences of compassion, love, or peace passed rather quickly, they can still help you find your way back to a deeper connection with the source of those emotions and energies—your essence. The question is, how can you create a closer relationship with your essence and its powerful resources and make it your foundation of self on a subconscious and cellular level?

Numerous scientific studies have demonstrated that meditation is very beneficial for your health and well-being. Meditation has been shown to support the healing of physical conditions such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and chronic pain.
¹⁰
Meditating has also proven to be helpful for alleviating anxiety and depression.
¹¹
People who meditate daily generally enjoy a higher quality of life with an increased sense of health and well-being.

Sounds promising. But if you’re like me, you’ve probably also struggled with learning how to meditate. When I first tried meditating at age eighteen, I thought there was nothing to it. All I needed to do was lie down, close my eyes, and after a few moments I would float into that blissful nirvana I’d heard others talk about. Unfortunately, one of two things seemed to get in the way: either I fell asleep after a few minutes or my mind insisted on presenting me with a long list of things I hadn’t done yet, the miserable failures of the past, or the unsolvable problems ahead of me. How can you reach that state of inner peace that meditation is supposed to give you when the moment you close your eyes, the very thoughts you want to let go of start popping up like firecrackers on the Fourth of July? Since my meditations only led to frustration, I decided that I was just one of those people who wasn’t meant to meditate.

Then, when I started practicing kundalini yoga in my early thirties, I changed my mind and made peace with meditation. Like all forms of yoga, kundalini yoga engages the mind, body, and spirit. What appealed to me was that this practice doesn’t focus so much on shaping your body into a perfect pretzel, but more on your relationship with yourself. Your eyes remain closed during the exercises—which allows you to stay aware of your thoughts, emotions, and your essence—while your body goes through the different movements. My yoga teacher said that it is a misconception to believe that we can completely turn off our minds. The illusion that we can only sets us up for failure. That sure took a load off my mind. He made me feel even better when he said that if we could still our minds for only one second, we would have mastered the art of meditating.

With the pressure off, I delved into meditation without great expectations, and I got so much out it that I even started teaching classes on how to meditate. For me, one of the most fascinating outcomes of meditating was that I didn’t get sick anymore. Whenever I felt a cold coming on, I simply meditated for fifteen minutes, focusing on vibrant health and well-being and knowing that my immune system could now handle whatever bug had invaded my body. It worked like a charm every time.