The Everything Orgasm Book

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Authors: Amy Cooper

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THE
EVERYTHING
®
ORGASM
BOOK

The all-you-need guide to the most
satisfying sex you'll ever have

Amy Cooper, PhD

Copyright © 2010 by F+W Media, Inc.
All rights reserved. This book, or parts there of, may not be reproduced
in any form without permission from the publisher; exceptions
are made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.

An Everything
®
Series Book.
Everything
®
and everything.com
®
are registered trademarks of F+W Media, Inc.

Published by Adams Media, a division of F+W Media, Inc.
57 Littlefield Street, Avon, MA 02322 U.S.A.
www.adamsmedia.com

ISBN 10: 1-60550-992-2
ISBN 13: 978-1-60550-992-1 (paperback)
ISBN 13: 978-1-60550-993-8 (EPUB)

Printed in the United States of America.

J I H G F E D C B A

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
is available from the publisher.

This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information with regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional advice. If legal advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional person should be sought.

— From a
Declaration of Principles
jointly adopted by a Committee of the American Bar Association and a Committee of Publishers and Associations

Many of the designations used by manufacturers and sellers to distinguish their products are claimed as trademarks. Where those designations appear in this book and Adams Media was aware of a trademark claim, the designations have been printed with initial capital letters.

Illustrations by Eric Andrews

This book is available at quantity discounts for bulk purchases.
For information, please call 1-800-289-0963.

All the examples and dialogues used in this book are fictional, and have been created by the author to illustrate particular situations.

THE EVERYTHING
®
ORGASM BOOK

Dear Reader,

What a gift for me to be able to share this information with you! I feel blessed to have this opportunity to write so much about a subject I feel so strongly about. I hope to make some difference in the lives of my readers who are searching for more information on a topic so rarely talked about at length in any real or informative way.

The path I have followed as a clinical sexologist has taken me to many interesting places and presented many new challenges. I have embraced this one fully with excitement and gusto, thinking of the lives I could touch and the sexualities I could help liberate and expand into whole new territories of discovery — and ultimately pleasure.

For me, the orgasmic experience is one of total release and surrender, and it has a life of its own. It too yearns for growth and expansion. It wants to find new heights and greater depths. This book is intended to support that growth and expansion so that your orgasmic experience can keep improving. May you find yourself in ever-increasing orgasmic bliss!

Welcome to the EVERYTHING
®
Series!

These handy, accessible books give you all you need to tackle a difficult project, gain a new hobby, or even brush up on something you learned back in school but have since forgotten. You can choose to read from cover to cover or just pick out information from our four useful boxes.

Alerts

Urgent warnings

Facts

Important snippets of information

Essentials

Quick handy tips

Questions

Answers to common questions

When you're done reading, you can finally
say you know
EVERYTHING
®
!

PUBLISHER
Karen Cooper

DIRECTOR OF ACQUISITIONS AND INNOVATION
Paula Munier

MANAGING EDITOR, EVERYTHING
®
SERIES
Lisa Laing

COPY CHIEF
Casey Ebert

ACQUISITIONS EDITOR
Katrina Schroeder

ASSOCIATE DEVELOPMENT EDITOR
Elizabeth Kassab

SENIOR DEVELOPMENT EDITOR
Brett Palana-Shanahan

EDITORIAL ASSISTANT
Hillary Thompson

EVERYTHING
®
SERIES COVER DESIGNER Erin Alexander

LAYOUT DESIGNERS
Colleen Cunningham, Elisabeth Lariviere, Ashley Vierra, Denise Wallace

Visit the entire Everything
®
series at
www.everything.com

To seekers of greater pleasure and bliss — there is more!

Acknowledgments

I would like to thank my beloved family, friends, lovers, and community who have encouraged and supported me through this entire book writing process. A huge thank you to my amazing partner, Tim Hartnett, for all of the faith, support, and guidance you have offered me throughout the years, not to mention the endless hours of editing you have put into this book. A special thank you to my dear friend, Andrew Davis, for your encouragement and all of your help with the orgasm survey; and to my beloved friends, Monica Woelfel and Rebecca McCubbin, for help with editing and finishing touches. Thank you to my dear friend, Carmen Alvarez, whose support and love for me holds me up and means more to me than she may really know. Thank you to Katrina Schroeder at Adams Media for finding me and for your steady encouragement and support. And tremendous thanks to all of the other pioneers and scholars in the field of sexuality, past and present, whose courage and insight shed much needed light onto a topic that has been kept in the dark for too long.

Top 10 Keys to Improving Your Experience of Orgasm
  1. Rid yourself of any sexual shame or inhibitions.

  2. Work to improve your overall health and fitness.

  3. Practice relaxation and deep breathing.

  4. Maintain strong but relaxed pelvic floor muscles.

  5. Self-pleasure regularly.

  6. Become more aware of all of your senses.

  7. Explore all of your body's potential erogenous zones.

  8. Practice building more sexual arousal and holding more sexual charge.

  9. Be open to exploring a variety of sexual behaviors.

  10. Improve your communication skills in regard to sex.

Contents

Introduction

1. The Mystique of Orgasm

Describing Orgasm

The Meaning of Orgasm

Myths about Orgasm

Life's Variety

The Politics of Orgasm

2. Tuning Your Instrument

The Body-Mind Instrument

Sex-Positive and Shame-Free

Body Image

Good Overall Health

Stress Reduction

A Strong Pelvic Floor

3. The Do Re Mi of Orgasm

Her Sexual Anatomy

His Sexual Anatomy

Human Sexual Response

The Body Systems Involved in Sexual Arousal and Orgasm

4. Exploring Your Erotic Body-Mind

Accepting Your Sexual Self

Your Arousal Map

Getting Up Close and Personal

Getting to Know Your Erogenous Zones

5. Practicing Alone or Playing Solo

Self-Pleasuring

The Basics of Getting Down with Yourself

Developing Your Technique

A Sacred Solo Ritual

6. Harmonizing with Your Lover

Loving Yourself

Talking about Sex

Sexual Relationship Dynamics

Intimacy-Enhancing Exercises

7. The Art of Sensuality

Creating a Sensual Environment

Sensual Massage

Skin Delicious

The Sensual Art of Kissing

8. Erotic Play: Building Up the Heat

The Art of Seduction

Dressing Up (or Down) to Seduce

Erotic Talk

Erotic Touch

Dancing

Sharing Fantasies and Role-Play

9. You Deserve a Hand: Manual Paths to Orgasm with a Lover

Self-Pleasuring with Your Lover

Manual Stimulation

Bringing Him to Orgasm with Your Hand

Bringing Her to Orgasm with Your Hand

10. Put Your Body Where My Mouth Is: Oral Paths to Orgasm

The Art of Oral Pleasure

Fellatio

Cunnilingus

Variations of Oral Pleasure

11. Penetration and Orgasms

The Act of Penetration

Readiness for Penetration

So Many Positions, So Little Time

The Entry

Tips and Techniques for Penetration

Is Everybody Coming?

12. The Use of Sex Aids

Lubricants

Sex Toys: Dildos, Vibrators, and More

Sex Props and Accessories

Aphrodisiacs

Music

Sexually Explicit Media

Erotica

13. Special Circumstances

Pregnancy

Aging

Hormone Replacement Therapy

Disability, Illness, and Medical Conditions

Pre-Orgasmic Women

Low Libido

Pain with Sex

Lack of Ejaculatory Control

Erectile Difficulty

14. Enhancing Your Orgasms

Multiple Orgasms

G-Spot Orgasm and Female Ejaculation

Power Exchange

Expansive Orgasmic Experiences

Appendix A. Glossary

Appendix B. Additional Resources

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