The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (327 page)

Flourish of cornets. Enter the KING, attended with divers young Lords taking leave for the Florentine war; BERTRAM, and PAROLLES

KING

Farewell, young lords; these warlike principles

Do not throw from you: and you, my lords, farewell:

Share the advice betwixt you; if both gain, all

The gift doth stretch itself as 'tis received,

And is enough for both.

Farewell, young lords; do not forget

these principles of war: and farewell to you, my lords :

share the advice amongst you; if you both take it

the gift will stretch and make enough for both of you.

First Lord

'Tis our hope, sir,

After well enter'd soldiers, to return

And find your grace in health.

We hope, Sir,

that once we have acquitted ourselves well as soldiers

we will come back to find your Grace recovered.

KING

No, no, it cannot be; and yet my heart

Will not confess he owes the malady

That doth my life besiege. Farewell, young lords;

Whether I live or die, be you the sons

Of worthy Frenchmen: let higher Italy,--

Those bated that inherit but the fall

Of the last monarchy,--see that you come

Not to woo honour, but to wed it; when

The bravest questant shrinks, find what you seek,

That fame may cry you loud: I say, farewell.

No, that will not happen; although my heart

won't admit to the seriousness of the illness

that is attacking my life. Farewell, young lords;

whether I live or die, acquit yourselves

as good Frenchmen: let great Italy-

that depressed nation suffering from

the fall of the last kingdom

 -see that you have come

not to flirt with honour, but to marry it;

when the bravest knight shrinks back, you charge in,

so that you will be celebrated: I say farewell.

Second Lord

Health, at your bidding, serve your majesty!

May health come to your Majesty when you call it!

KING

Those girls of Italy, take heed of them:

They say, our French lack language to deny,

If they demand: beware of being captives,

Before you serve.

Look out for those Italian girls:

they say that the French cannot say no

to their offers: don't go getting taken prisoner

before you've even started fighting.

Both

Our hearts receive your warnings.

We'll take your warning to heart.

KING

Farewell. Come hither to me.

Farewell. Come back to me.

Exit, attended

First Lord

O, my sweet lord, that you will stay behind us!

Oh, my sweet lord, why do you have to stay behind!

PAROLLES

'Tis not his fault, the spark.

It's not the lad's fault.

Second Lord

O, 'tis brave wars!

Oh, how exciting to be going to war!

PAROLLES

Most admirable: I have seen those wars.

Yes, wonderful: I've been to war.

BERTRAM

I am commanded here, and kept a coil with

'Too young' and 'the next year' and ''tis too early.'

I am ordered to stay here, and tied up with

‘you're too young’ and ‘maybe next year’ and ‘it's too early.’

PAROLLES

An thy mind stand to't, boy, steal away bravely.

And you're thinking of sneaking away to the war.

BERTRAM

I shall stay here the forehorse to a smock,

Creaking my shoes on the plain masonry,

Till honour be bought up and no sword worn

But one to dance with! By heaven, I'll steal away.

 If I stay here I'll be bossed around by women,

wearing my shoes out on the palace floors,

until there is no honour left and the only sword I'll wear

will be a dress one! By God, I'll run away.

First Lord

There's honour in the theft.

It would be an honourable crime.

PAROLLES

Commit it, count.

Do it, count.

Second Lord

I am your accessary; and so, farewell.

I am your accomplice; and so, goodbye.

BERTRAM

I grow to you, and our parting is a tortured body.

I lean out to you, and parting tears me apart.

First Lord

Farewell, captain.

Farewell, captain.

Second Lord

Sweet Monsieur Parolles!

Sweet Monsieur Parolles!

PAROLLES

Noble heroes, my sword and yours are kin. Good

sparks and lustrous, a word, good metals: you shall

find in the regiment of the Spinii one Captain

Spurio, with his cicatrice, an emblem of war, here

on his sinister cheek; it was this very sword

entrenched it: say to him, I live; and observe his

reports for me.

My noble heroes, you are my brothers in arms. Good

lads and true, you're made of good stuff: you will

find in the Spinii Regiment one captain Spurio,

who has a scar, a war wound, here

on his left cheek; it was this sword right here

which cut it: tell him I'm still alive; and tell me

how he reacts.

First Lord

We shall, noble captain.

We shall, noble captain.

Exeunt Lords

PAROLLES

Mars dote on you for his novices! what will ye do?

The God of War wants you for an apprentice! What will you do?

BERTRAM

Stay: the king.

Hush: here's the King.

Re-enter KING. BERTRAM and PAROLLES retire

PAROLLES

[To BERTRAM] Use a more spacious ceremony to the

noble lords; you have restrained yourself within the

list of too cold an adieu: be more expressive to

them: for they wear themselves in the cap of the

time, there do muster true gait, eat, speak, and

move under the influence of the most received star;

and though the devil lead the measure, such are to

be followed: after them, and take a more dilated farewell.

You should be more fulsome to the noble lords;

you have limited yourself to

too cold a goodbye: be warmer towards them:

for they are following the right path,

they are walking well, eating, speaking and moving

under the influence of the best loved star;

even if the devil is leading the dance they should

be followed: go after them, and say a fuller goodbye.

BERTRAM

And I will do so.

I shall do so.

PAROLLES

Worthy fellows; and like to prove most sinewy sword-men.

They are good chaps, and likely to make excellent soldiers.

Exeunt BERTRAM and PAROLLES

Enter LAFEU

LAFEU

[Kneeling] Pardon, my lord, for me and for my tidings.

Forgive me, my lord, for the news that I bring.

KING

I'll fee thee to stand up.

I'd like you to stand up.

LAFEU

Then here's a man stands, that has brought his pardon.

I would you had kneel'd, my lord, to ask me mercy,

And that at my bidding you could so stand up.

Then here stands a man who has bought a pardon.

I wish you had kneeled, my lord, to ask me for mercy,

so that I could give you permission to stand.

KING

I would I had; so I had broke thy pate,

And ask'd thee mercy for't.

I wish I had, I wish I'd smacked you on the head

and asked you for mercy.

LAFEU

Good faith, across: but, my good lord 'tis thus;

Will you be cured of your infirmity?

By heaven, a good answer: but, my good lord, this is how it stands;

do you want to be cured of your illness?

KING

No.

No.

LAFEU

O, will you eat no grapes, my royal fox?

Yes, but you will my noble grapes, an if

My royal fox could reach them: I have seen a medicine

That's able to breathe life into a stone,

Quicken a rock, and make you dance canary

With spritely fire and motion; whose simple touch,

Is powerful to araise King Pepin, nay,

To give great Charlemain a pen in's hand,

And write to her a love-line.

Oh so my royal fox will have no grapes?

Yes, you will want the grapes I offer,

if the Royal Fox can get them: I have seen a medicine

that can breathe life into a stone,

get a rock moving, can make you dance

a passionate lively jig; a drop of this

would resurrect King Pepin,

or get great Charlemagne to take up his pen

and write her a love letter.

KING

What 'her' is this?

Who is the ‘her’ you refer to?

LAFEU

Why, Doctor She: my lord, there's one arrived,

If you will see her: now, by my faith and honour,

If seriously I may convey my thoughts

In this my light deliverance, I have spoke

With one that, in her sex, her years, profession,

Wisdom and constancy, hath amazed me more

Than I dare blame my weakness: will you see her

For that is her demand, and know her business?

That done, laugh well at me.

 Why, she's a doctor: my lord, she has come here,

if you will see her: now, by my faith and honor,

if I can speak seriously

in this light-hearted tone, I have spoken

To one who for her sex, her age, her profession,

her wisdom and loyalty, has impressed me more

than could be accounted for by any bias: will you see her

and discover what she wants, for that is what she asks?

There, I've said it, have a good laugh.

KING

Now, good Lafeu,

Bring in the admiration; that we with thee

May spend our wonder too, or take off thine

By wondering how thou took'st it.

Now then, good Lafeu,

bring in this miracle, so we can be amazed

like you, or stop your amazement

by questioning what you think is so special.