The Beats in Rift (5 page)

I try shaking my head but it’s no good. The walls close in around me, fog clouding my mind, and then darkness steals me.

WORKOUT WITH COACH was killer. Every muscle aches but it will be worth it. Dad has already been talking with scouts and colleges that are interested in me. He keeps me focused with his belief I’m going all the way.

I make it home around nine, expecting people to already be here, or at least be arriving. I notice the drive has only Mom’s truck on the forecourt. I’m surprised but relieved I can shower and change before people get here.

Opening the front door, I almost knock straight into Jared, our faces an inch apart. He’s pale and his eyes are downcast. The hairs on my neck rise. “What’s wrong with you?”

“We’re leaving.” He speaks with authority, like it isn’t a choice, it’s happening. I follow him as he anxiously gathers suitcases and piles them at the front door. My whole body goes rigid.

“What’s going on, Jared? Where’s Beats?”

“Fuck Beats.”

I actually flinch and stumble backwards with the venom in his voice. “What did you say?”

Stopping in front of me, his face contorts in disgust. “Dad’s been fucking her Mom and Beats knew. He’s also been knocking Mom about and threatened her life. I’m taking her out of here. I never should have let it get this far. I knew she wasn’t right.”

Shock settles in at what he’s saying; the room spins. When I finally refocus I reach out for him, stopping him from getting more stuff.

“Jared, seriously. What the hell? Dad would never hurt Mom. She’s been depressed, she doesn’t realize what she’s saying.”

Shoving me backwards with a snarl he carries on moving things. “I knew you would stick up for him. I just caught him in the act, Justin.”

I shake my head. “Caught him doing what exactly?”

Jared’s temper is like a fire cracker and I can see it blowing. “I caught him fucking Beats’ whore of a mother.”

I mind can’t keep up, my Dad wouldn’t do that and Jared worships Beats and has never, ever put down her mother or her. Nothing was making sense. Our Dad couldn’t stand Meadows Mom. “Where is Beats?”

His glare penetrates me, pinning me to the spot. “Are you listening to me? Dad’s fucking her Mom and hitting ours. I left Beats where she belongs, with her mother. I’m taking Mom away from here, Justin. You coming or not?”

“Don’t be stupid. Where are you going to go?”

“I don’t care but I’m leaving now. I’m not sitting around here waiting for him to beat the shit out of her.”

He brushes past me and out the front door, loading Mom’s truck. Headlights beam up the drive, highlighting us in a glow.

Dad leaps from his car. “What are you doing?” he bellows at me. I shrug my shoulders and hold my hands up.

“Jared’s packing up and leaving with Mom.” I almost want to laugh at the absurdity, this couldn’t be happening. Disbelief settles itself in my bones unmoving, letting me watch everything play out as if it wasn’t happening to us.

Jared throws another suitcase into the truck then turns to me.

“You’re not coming?” His voice is strained. He’s serious, he’s really going to leave.

“No, he’s not and you’re not leaving either. You have the wrong idea. I was only at Meadow’s house to speak to her Mom.”

Jared’s laugh is ice cold. “Yeah, sounded like talking. What about Mom?” He squares up to Dad, flexing his neck, his hands balling into fists. “The bruises? Dad?”

“Your Mom’s depressed. She’s been brainwashing you.”

Shaking his head and walking back into the house. He appears a minute later with Mom, helping her into the truck and shutting her door. “Justin, get in the truck,” he commands.

“No way is he leaving, Jared. He has a game on Friday. You’re being ridiculous, and you’re really pushing my patience.”

He ignores Dad and looks at me. “I’m not coming back, Justin. Come with us, please.”

I shake my head. Where will he go? He isn’t old enough to just take off. He’ll be back when he cools off. He’ll never leave Beats or me.

“I can’t. I have a game.”

“Fuck the game. Get in the truck.”

I step back and Dad’s hand lands on my shoulder. “My life’s the game, Jared,” I tell him, hoping he will understand. I can’t risk missing the game for his tantrum.

Pain washes into his eyes, distorting the color, but it’s fleeting. Anger replaces it as he gets in the truck and leaves.

It isn’t just a tantrum.

“MY DAD’S NOT going to be there, Meadow. And even if he was, he’s been better with you lately. Come on! I can’t have a party without you there.”

It’s been nearly two years since Jared left with my Mom. There has been no letters and no phone calls. Nothing.

When Meadow turned up late that night and I had to tell her Jared took off, she broke. I had to hold her while she sobbed. She was inconsolable. It was so hard on her; she lost weight, stopped playing her guitar, stopped writing.

After the first three months, when it became apparent to both of us he wasn’t coming back, we bonded even tighter. She wouldn’t leave my side. I knew being near me made her feel closer to Jared. In a way, being close to her made me feel closer to him too.

She became more involved in school, came to my every game and practice. She stopped dying colors into her hair. Her style changed; she dressed more like the popular girls. She studied extra hard and went back to not dating. Not that guys didn’t ask her out, they did. She had blossomed even more in the last two years. Now she wears more fitted clothes showing off her figure; full bust, trim waist, shapely hips and toned long legs. She’s perfect and I’m still completely in love with her. I’ve been in love with her since the day I looked into her unique eyes when she was thirteen years old. But she was off limits then. She didn’t date, and when she decided to date, my brother snapped her up. He never knew how much I loved her but I could feel his love radiating from him since the day we met her, so I always knew I wouldn’t pursue her and she would be with him. I smiled and supported them when they became an item. But he’s gone and the need for her has gotten stronger than ever.

“Okay, fine. I’ll come but you have to promise to not disappear with Melissa.”

I look over at her, surprised. Melissa is my hook-up buddy. She has been since forever. She’s easy and she worships me. Sometimes I need to feel needed in that way.

“Are you jealous, Meadow?” I grin at her arched brow before she retorts.

“No, it’s just annoying being forced to parties then being left by ten o’ clock so you can go get some with the school ‘ho.”

I laugh loud at her little outburst. “That happened once, Meds, and you were fine being swamped with admirers fighting for your attention.” I arch my own brow at her.

“Hardly, anyway I’m not interested in them.”

Her voice is small. I put my hand on her knee, sneaking looks at her while trying to concentrate on the drive to her house.

“Meadow,” I breathe. She turns her head to look out the window. She sends me mixed signals all the time. Sometimes she sounds like she’s jealous, but she never takes things further. I’m terrified if I do try to take things from more than friends, she will shut me down and I’ll lose her altogether. I couldn’t cope if I lost her.

When Jared left and didn’t come back, I felt like half the guy I used to be. He’s my brother, my best friend. I still struggle with the fact he never came back. Just looking in the mirror is painful.

I pull up and she jumps out; the tension in the car is at an all-time high. She’s in and out in minutes, her overnight bag on her shoulder. Pulling open the door she throws it in the back seat. She grins. “Let’s go, birthday boy.”

And just like that the tension evaporates.

“SO, DO YOU call him Jared when you’re making out?”

I’m ready to punch this girl in the face and I’m not one for violence. He has been gone two years and stupid drunk dumbasses still bring him up like he’s still here. Nobody else saw the Jacobs twins as individuals, even after Jared upped and left. The pain still surfaces when people talk about him, even after all this time. What people don’t realize is that to me, Justin is nothing like Jared. They’re completely different. I don’t see Jared when I look at Justin, which is crazy because they share a face, but I know both of the boys better than anyone so I’ve always seen them as the amazing individuals they are… were.

I clutch at the hum beginning in my chest; the sorrow that lives there is a constant ache, a soul crying out for its lost mate.

“I don’t call him anything because we don’t make out.” I roll my eyes as hers bulge.

“Oh, God! Is that why he cheats on you all the time?”

I really want to kill Justin for leaving me after he promised he wouldn’t.

I look around the swarms of sweaty classmates and spot him pinned up against a wall, Melissa’s tongue down his throat. My stomach turns over. I hate that he lets that trollop touch him. I know he has feelings for me, I can see it when he looks at me, and I do for him too but I’m so scared to open my heart again. Especially to Jared’s brother. How low would that make me? I know he must feel the same because he’s never tried to make a move either.

My eyes lock with his as Melissa lets him up for air. He holds my gaze for what feels like forever, then pushes Melissa aside as she tries leaning back in to him.

“Justin, where are you going?” She whines loud enough to carry over the music as he leaves her. He mounts the stairs, ignoring people as they try to talk to him.

“You a Jesus type?” the idiot standing next to me asks. “I don’t think even for God I would be able to keep my hands off him. He’s so yummy.”

I sigh, closing my eyes to let out an exasperated breath. She’s not wrong. Justin is gorgeous. He’s filled out into a six foot three, ripped, athletic God. His brown hair neatly styles over his perfect face. He has a strong jawline, full lips, a neat nose and those amazing amber eyes surrounded by thick lashes.

“Excuse me,” I tell the drunken girl, moving her to the side and brushing past the sweaty bodies dancing in front of me. I make my way to the stairs and go to Justin’s room. I try the door but it’s locked so I rap my knuckles against it.

“This room is off limits!”

“It’s me. Open the door.”

“Meadow, I’m busy getting laid. Go to the spare room to crash.”

My stomach turns over. He doesn’t ever talk to me like that and I know he wouldn’t in front of someone else so he’s more than likely not with anyone. But the thought of him in there getting laid leaves an unsettled feeling in my stomach.

“Okay,” I call to him. “I was just checking if it’s okay if I take someone in there with me?” I bait him, playing him at his own game.

“What?” comes his confused voice, a notch higher than before.

“I thought I’d get laid too, so I just wanted to make sure it was okay to take my guy in there. So… okay, thanks.”

I fold my arms over my chest and wait the two seconds it takes for him to yank the door open. His face is pure rage. He looks past me and down the hall.

“WHO?” he bellows. I shake my head and push past him into his room. He keeps looking into the hall.