That Summer (Part Two) (15 page)

The
next morning I wake up to the smell of breakfast. Its incredible aroma has made
its way inside the bedroom and encourages me to follow its scent all the way
downstairs.

I
expect to find Cole in the kitchen frying eggs and bacon but instead come face
to face with a friendly looking woman around the age of sixty-five. She beams
at me as I make my way down the stairs, surprising me when she greets me
warmly.

“How
are you, Serena?”

She
smiles at me politely, as though she was expecting me at any moment.

“Erm…
I’m fine.” I murmur softly, struggling to understand who this random woman
might be and why she’s in Cole’s kitchen. “Who are you?”

“I’m
the housekeeper.” She answers me, carrying on with what she was doing. “I was
instructed to make you some breakfast before you came downstairs.”

“Oh,
I see.” I murmur, tugging my fingers through my unruly hair. “Where is Cole?”

“He
popped out a few minutes ago but he said he wouldn’t be long. He should be back
any second.”

“And
how long have you been working for him?”

“I
work for the both of you now so please feel free to let me know if you would
like me to make you something else. My name is Annette and I’m here to help.”

It
takes a few moments for her announcement to sink in and I stare at her
vacantly. Did she just say that she works for
me
?

“Thanks
but the bacon and eggs you’re making smell incredible. I’m more than happy with
them.”

“You
got it.”

I
take a seat on one of the kitchen bar stools, swinging back and forth as I
watch her finish off my breakfast. I’m still wearing my dressing gown from the
night before and glance at the clock which is on the wall behind me. It’s still
only half past nine so I have no idea where Cole might be.

“Do…
do you know who I am?” I enquire, wondering how much she knows about my complex
relationship with Cole.

“You’re
my employer.” She replies, smiling pleasantly. “That’s all I need to know.”

I’m
halfway through eating when I hear the sound of the front door open. Cole
strolls in a few seconds later and smiles warmly when he sees me tucking into
my scrumptious food.

“Good
morning, baby. How’s your breakfast?”

He
greets me warmly, placing a kiss on the centre of my forehead before he takes a
seat on the chair opposite.

“Amazing.”
I mumble, covering my mouth so I can continue eating but still answer his
question.

“That’s
good.” He chuckles lightly, grinning happily. “Annette is a fantastic cook.”

“Thank
you, Sir.” Annette interjects respectfully, places a boiling hot cup of tea on
the table in front of Cole.

“Haven’t
we already talked about this?” He challenges her playfully. “Please call me,
Cole.”

“I’m
from the generation where you show respect to your employers, I’m not sure it’s
something I’ll be able to get used to.” She adds, tightening the apron around
her waist.

“Please
try.”

“Alright
then… can I get you anything, Cole?”

I
can see how uncomfortable she is addressing him on a first name basis and I
can’t help but like this elderly woman who is so amiable and sweet natured.

“I
would love what she’s having but with fried bread if that’s ok?”

Cole
points towards my plate before opening the newspaper he had tucked under his
arm. I guess I now know what he went out for so early this morning.

“Of
course. It’s coming right up.”

“Could
I have some coffee?” I whisper, glancing at Cole warily.

“Of
course you can. You don’t have to ask for anything.” He reminds me, smiling
with amusement.

I
go to stand up but Cole stops me, taking hold of my wrist gently.

“I
want you to relax and take it easy this morning, Annette can get you anything
you want.”

“What
would you like, Miss? Did I hear you mention coffee?” Annette turns around to
face me, awaiting my instruction.

“Um…
I would love some if that’s ok with you? But I really don’t mind fixing it
myself.” I add, still feeling uncomfortable with the idea of someone rushing
around after me.

“Nonsense,
I’ll get that for you.”

Cole
and I eat our breakfast together but don’t do much talking until Annette has
cleared up the kitchen and left the room. I hear the vacuum cleaner upstairs a
few minutes later and figure she must take care of the housework as well as all
the cooking and cleaning.

“What
do you think of Annette?” He asks, closing his newspaper so he can give me his
undivided attention.

“She’s
really nice.” I say, speaking the truth. “I like her a lot.”

“That’s
why I employed her in the first place, I hoped you two would get on.”

“Any
more household staff I should know about?” I joke, softly touching the tender
spot on my cheek which still feels sore from the blow Cole gave me a few days
before.

His
expression changes, switching suddenly. He turns away as though he can’t bring
himself to look and walks over to the window which looks out onto the back of
the house. The view is exquisite and I join him, placing my hand on his
shoulder.

“I
hate myself for what I did.” He murmurs softly, staring out the window.

“I
know that now.” I soothe him, stroking his arm gently.

He
turns to face me, taking hold of my face in his hands so he can get a good look
at my bruised cheekbone.

“How
can I ever make it up to you?” He asks, pleading with me to tell him.

“By
living a good life. No more fighting, no more violence and keep up with your
medication if that’s what your doctor advises. Some therapy sessions might be a
good idea as well.”

“I
see my new therapist once a week. He somehow manages to see the best in me when
all I can see is darkness.”

He
lowers his head with sadness but I place my fingers underneath his chin,
forcing him to look at me directly.

“Let
me help you… I’ll do my very best to make the darkness disappear. I promise you
that.”

“You
already have.” He says quietly, smiling weakly.

The
next few days pass by so quickly, they all seem to blur into one. I wake up
each morning and find that Annette has my breakfast ready on the table for me.
Cole always goes out for his morning paper and comes back around half nine in
time to join me in the kitchen.

I
then go upstairs and take delight in the luxurious walk-in shower which Cole
had installed for me. Most days have been spent exploring the grounds of my new
home and familiarising myself with the latest technology which exists in every
room. I found the plasma TV’s extremely complicated to figure out at first but
I’m slowly getting better when it comes to Cole’s modern gadgets which equip
our new home.

Our
evening strolls through the spacious fields are my favourite. We tend to watch the
sunset in the same spot on an evening and I honestly believe that it would be
impossible for me to be any happier than this. My life feels… complete and I
know that doesn’t come from having an exquisite house or a breath-taking view
each night.

It’s
because of Cole.

I
can’t believe I ever thought I could exist without him. I don’t see how I
managed to convince myself that a life without him would be simpler. I guess I
was in denial and it took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that
Cole and I cannot be apart.

I’ve
rarely venture outside the front gate but when I have, Cole has stuck by me
every second. We went out for a meal one evening and I could see in his eyes
that he thought I would run. I knew he wouldn’t stop me if I tried but it would
certainly destroy him. There’s a part of Cole which will always be broken and I
don’t kid myself that I can fix that. What I am aware of is that I somehow
manage to ease his pain.

I
don’t try and understand the complexities of our messed up relationship but I
now acknowledge that our lives will always intertwine. Whether we are living
side by side or there are a thousand miles between us, our connection will
remain. It is pointless fighting it when I realise that this sacred time we spend
together may not last.

The
police could find us out at any moment and the threat of that is something we
both must contend with if we plan on being together. It’s a threat which looms
over us each and every day, working its way inside our harmonious home life and
disrupting our peaceful solitude on a daily basis.

I
send Lisa a text a few days later, providing her with a list of reasons why I
decided to leave town and start afresh somewhere new. She was frantic at first,
bombarding me with phone calls and demanding that I meet up with her so she
could see for herself that I really am alive and well.

I
spoke to her a few days later and somehow convinced her that the decision to
leave everything behind me was my own idea. I lied and told her it had nothing
to do with Cole, hating myself for being so deceitful to my oldest friend.

Cole
promised me that we can go back there someday but right now we can’t risk it. I
understand that Natalie will be suspicious and that means I’ll have to lie to
her when she starts wondering where I am and why I barely keep in touch
anymore.

My
sacrifices are immense but all of them are worth it. If it means I get to spend
the rest of my life with Cole then I am willing to do anything.

Cole
and I were curled up on the sofa one night when he finally asked me about our
father, wondering if I still stayed in contact with him after everything that
transpired.

“He
wanted to see me when I returned home and I was living with Lisa and her
family.” I admitted, recalling the amount of times I had received letters from
my estranged father.

“And
did you meet up with him?”

“I
couldn’t.” I told him, staring into the dazzling flames of the log fire in
front of us. “Not after I found out about you. It just didn’t feel right.”

The
comforting heat from the fire warmed my entire body. The blaze and the vibrancy
from its flare was captivating and I found it difficult to tear my eyes away
from it.

“He
tried to see me when I was in prison but I rejected every one of his visits. I
blamed him for everything and it wasn’t until I started seeing my therapist
that I started to let go of some the anger I felt for him.” Cole confessed,
watching me closely.

“He’s
never been a significant part of our lives.” I reminded him, bringing the
conversation about our father to a close. “I don’t see why he should be now.”

“I
agree.”

“What
about your mum?” I probed with caution.

“I
haven’t seen her since I went to prison. She didn’t reach out or try and visit
so I can only presume that she wanted nothing to do with the entire thing… including
me.”

There
was a hint of sorrow in his voice and I longed to reach out and ease some of
the pain he had been carrying for so long.

“It
was the same with mine. She was just looking for an excuse to get rid of me. She
knew my dad would stop paying her money as soon as I turned eighteen so I guess
she was glad when I decided to go and live with Lisa and her family.”

“You
know it will be different if we ever have kids.” He said, speaking with
confidence.

“Cole,
you know that isn’t possible.”

“Why
not?”

“You
know
why!” I proclaimed angrily. “We have no right to do that to a
child, especially when we know all the things that could go wrong. It would be
selfish.”

“It
would be selfish of us to give our child a two loving, doting and protective
parents?” He challenged me incredulously.

“It
would be selfish of us to risk his or her health for the sake of starting a
family. You don’t know what complications might be involved when two people who
are related go onto have children.”

“I’m
never going to be able to get you to change your mind, am I?” He asked, rubbing
his forehead to ease some of the tension.

“That’s
right.”

I
made sure I sounded certain, leaving no room for doubt or confusion.

“Alright
then.” He sighed dejectedly. “I’ll admit defeat… for now.”

Chapter Ten

I’ve
been living with Cole for four weeks now but we’ve still not slept together. We
sleep in separate rooms because I guess Cole doesn’t think he would be able to
handle sleeping in the same bed as me without doing anything.

I’ve
been holding back because I remember what the consequences were after the first
and only time we had sex. The guilt and shame which consumed me back then was
enough to convince that I should phone the police and I’ve been living alongside
the ramifications of that phone call ever since.

It
nearly destroyed us and the fear of something similar happening again is enough
to deter me from taking it any further again with Cole.

He’s
been understanding so far but I can see that the tension is getting to him.
We’re living in such close proximity that it seems unnatural for us to part
ways when we go to bed.

That’s
where I am right now and it’s driving me insane to know he’s just along the
corridor in one of the other rooms. I’m fighting against every single instinct
that I have to climb out of bed and join him.

Without
thinking, I creep out of bed and make my way across the bedroom, opening the
door quietly. I don’t know what time it is but I know it’s late. The house is
silent and the only sound which can be heard is the hammering of my heart
inside my chest.

There
is no going back once I enter Cole’s bedroom and I’m aware that we’ll both have
to live with the repercussions of what takes place tonight. However, I’m so
incredibly aroused at this point that I no longer care, willing to risk
absolutely everything for one night with the man who has drove me insane for
the past three years. The man I no longer believe I could actually exist
without.

The
same one I pretend with each day.

The
one I convince myself is no longer forbidden…

I
knock lightly on his door, deciding to go on back to my own room if there’s no
answer. I start to second guess myself and turn around when Cole’s door open
and I’m caught red handed.

“Are
you ok?” He asks, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes while stifling a yawn,

“I-I’m
fine.” I stammer nervously, tugging on the hem of Cole’s large T-shirt.

I’ve
slept in it every night since I move in but now I feel exposed and I shift from
one foot to the other as I feel my cheeks turning crimson with embarrassment.

“What’s
wrong? Did you hear a noise or something?”

“No,
I… I just…”

“Just
what?”

“I
wanted to be with you.” I admit, averting my gaze to the floor beneath me.

There’s
a moment of silence between us while I wait for his response, realising how
idiotic my last statement just made me sound.

“You
mean…?”

“Yes.”
I blurt out hastily. “You know what I mean.”

He
exhales slowly, resembling someone who can’t quite believe what they just
heard. He strokes his thumb along the length of his jawline, considering
something.

“Come
here.”

I
wait a couple of seconds before I follow his instruction and cross the hallway
until I’m standing right in front of him. He places his fingers underneath my
chin, tilting my face up towards his.

“What
now?” I enquire timidly.

“Kiss
me.”

“W-what?”

“
You
came to my room, Serena. If you want something from me, you better take
it.”

He
smirks at me and waits, challenging me to make the first move. He’s taunting
and playful at the same time which is an exasperating combination when you’re
on the receiving end of it.

“I
can’t.” I complain in annoyance. “I… I don’t know how to.”

“You
do
know.” Cole insists, refusing to give in. “Just do what coms natural.”

“That’s
easy for you to say.” I scoff, rolling my eyes in his direction.

“You’re
going to be sorry if you don’t kiss me in five seconds.” He warns, taking a
step closer towards me. “One… two… three… four…”

I
throw my arms around his neck and crush my mouth against his before he reaches
number five, moaning with pleasure when I feel his mouth open and I slip my
tongue inside. His arms circle my waist, tugging me in close so our chests
meet. I can feel his heartbeat against my skin and knowing he wants this just
as much as I do spurs me on even further.

We
somehow make inside his bedroom where he removes his own shirt before he slips
mine over my head.

“You
know that’s yours, right?” I whisper, smiling at the way he discarded it
without any thought.

“You
look incredible in it but I want you naked.” He growls, pushing me down onto
the bed.

I
watch him remove his boxer shorts, revealing how badly he wants me and how
aroused he is. Without thinking, I take him in my mouth and wrap my lips around
him. He groans with pleasure, fisting one of his hands in my hair as he
controls my movements. My tongue swirls around him and I moan, demanding more
of him as I continue to please him.

He
takes me by surprise when he places a hand on my shoulder, putting a stop to
what I was doing. He turns me around so that I’m on my hands and knees with
Cole behind me, pleasuring me with his own tongue and lips. I scream loudly,
thrusting my hips back and forth as I experience ecstasy for the first time in
years.

No
one has touched me since Cole and I’m so glad I remained true to him. I can’t
even imagine being intimate like this with someone else and know it’s because
there’s only ever been him. He’s the one and only man I have ever yearned for
and as much as our society or even the law will tell me that it’s wrong,
nothing will convince me that it’s true.

Cole
makes love to me that night and it’s beyond anything I can ever describe. He
refuses to tear his eyes away from me and watches my facial expressions the
entire time. We are urgent during some parts and others we are slower,
savouring every single moment because we still fear the day we are torn apart.

My
legs wrap around his waist as he thrusts himself inside of me, causing me to
feel an inexplicable mixture of pain and pleasure. He takes from my body what
he needs and in return he provides me with everything I have ever wanted. Our
souls connect as our bodies meet, joined together by our need for completion
and desire.

“You
feel incredible.” He groans, trailing kisses down my neck. “Nothing is quite as
perfect as you are.”

“Don’t
leave me.” I whisper, curling my fingers in his hair so I can force him to look
at me. “Don’t leave me alone again.”

“I
swear to you I won’t. You’re mine forever.”

Afterwards,
we remain tangled in each other’s arms, sleeping soundly for the first time in
years. I understand that what we have right now and what we’ve just shared
might not last forever. We’ve built our idyllic life together on quick sand and
sooner or later the foundations which we’ve created something so extraordinary
will be demolished.

I
just hope we can survive the destruction…