Seer: Thrall (9 page)

I reached a hand out, squirming around a little to do it, and caressed her check and the back of her neck. "When you're done, do the binding ritual."

She didn't wait another moment. She plunged her fangs deep into my neck, fastening her mouth around me. It felt like she could open her mouth far wider than would be normal. Her lips wrapped around the wound, forming a tight seal.

I gasped from the sudden pain, but I kept my hand on her neck, pulling her tightly against me. She worked her jaw, driving the fangs deeper, and I gasped again. Then she began to suck on my neck, drawing heavily.

It hurt, but then the pain changed, and waves of pleasure began coursing through my body. I gasped again, then moaned.

"Oh, Solange," I whispered. "Oh..."

Her reply was muffled, but I understood. "Mine?"

"Yes," I said. "Yours."

She drank. She drank for a long time.

* * * *

At some point, I passed out, not from blood loss, but simply from the pleasure. I woke some time later, and I was bundled up in bed. I stretched and discovered I wasn't restrained.

I tried to feel for the binding she must have done while I'd been passed out. I didn't feel any different.

"Solange?"

I rolled over. The side was down on the bed, and the side table was perched next to the bed. There was a note propped up on the table with my name on the outside. There was a light on, not bright, but enough I could read the note. I reached for it.

Dearest Sidney,

Thank you for your gift of life. You were everything I imagined all this time.

We are not bound. I didn't do it. I grant you your wish. I trust you.

Solange

I clutched the note to my chest and closed my eyes.

I slept.

Even in the dream, I knew it was a dream. Sometimes they were like that. Most people wake up when they realize they are dreaming, but I'd taught myself to control whether my dreams wake me, and so I continued to sleep.

I was watching Dolores. She was home. Chaos and Des -- short for Destruction -- were curled up together on her lap, and she was talking to them.

"I miss your Mommy," she told them. "She left so suddenly and has been gone so long. They didn't even let her come home for Christmas." She petted the two cats. Chaos had his eyes closed and was purring gently. Des was turned away from her and pretending he didn't like being pet, that he was only tolerating it, but I knew better.

"I don't know what I would have done without her," Dolores said. "My life was such a mess. It's still a mess. The guy she sent me is good, but he's not your Mommy. I'm going to lose my job. And I deserve to. I don't know what to do."

"Oh Dolores," I tried to say, but of course, it was a dream, and she couldn't hear me.

"At least I have the two of you," Dolores went on. "I've become such a wimp. I was never like this. I was always the outgoing one. I thought that person would come back, now that I'm away from Dusty. Your Mommy made me brave again." She bent down and kissed the cats on the top of their heads.

And then the dream ended, and I found myself staring into Thomas's face.

"Ms. Welsh," he said. "Please wake up." He was shaking me. "Ms. Welsh!"

"Please call Solange," I said. "Tell her I had a dream. It's not urgent, and it's not about what she needs from me, but I need to tell her about it."

He straightened. "Of course, Ms. Welsh."

"And Thomas," I said. "Was I hard to wake?"

"I've been trying for several minutes. I was going to call Ms. Casper, but she's at the office, so it would be the doctors next."

"In the future, if I don't wake easily, let me sleep, but be ready. You ended the dream early."

"Oh no!"

"It's okay," I said. "It was about a friend of mine, and she's fine. But if you can't wake me easily, then just wait. I'll wake naturally when the dream is over. You may consider calling Solange when that happens, as she's going to want to be here."

"Yes, Ms. Welsh," he said. "I'll call her now."

He stepped away and pulled out a phone. I didn't hear the conversation, but after a minute, he approached, holding the phone to me. I took it.

"Are you all right?" Solange asked immediately.

"I'm fine," I said. "I had a dream."

"So Thomas said."

"It was about Dolores," I said. I told her the dream, being brief and not offering all the details.

"Is this the best description you can give me?" she asked.

"No," I said. "And I'm sure your expert questioning could elicit even better details, but I hope you'll allow some privacy on this one. It doesn't concern you."

I could practically hear her thinking over the phone.

"Solange, I would like permission to call her."

"We'll discuss that tonight," she said. "Sidney, I will be the one who decides which dreams concern me."

"Solange..."

"Quiet," she ordered. "I am going to grant you your privacy, but you need to understand. I am a little possessive, and I do not promise I will always do so. If I ask questions about your dreams, you will answer them."

I thought about it. I'd promised my loyalty. "You will allow me to explain why I want privacy," I said. "And then I will answer your questions."

"And you will not grow angry if I intrude."

"No promises, but I'll calm down."

"And you will never, ever omit telling me you had a dream, regardless of the content."

"Promise," I said.

"All right," she said. "I stepped out of a meeting for this, and I should get back to it."

"I told Thomas it wasn't urgent."

"We'll discuss that another time. I'll see you tonight, Sidney." She clicked off without another word, and I held the phone out to Thomas.

* * * *

I was sitting on the sofa in the library when Solange found me.

"Hey," I said.

"Good evening, Sidney," she replied. She kept her distance from me and leaned against the fireplace, her arms crossed, watching me.

"Are you mad at me?"

"What?" She asked. "Oh. No."

"Why are you way over there?"

"I haven't eaten for three nights."

"I could make something." I'd probably sit on a stool while cooking, but I was getting stronger every day.

"Not that kind of eating, Sidney."

"What?" I paused. "Oh. You're thirsty." I thought about it. "I was your last, um... last meal?" She nodded. "I'm pretty sure we used to spend days together with little break. How were you getting blood without my noticing."

"I don't need blood daily, and I don't need that much. But I am having control problems around you right now."

I nodded understanding, as incomplete as it was.

"I wanted to talk about Dolores. And I want to talk about the rules."

I stilled. "All right," I said cautiously. I was afraid she was about to deny my request. "I have questions."

"Let's address your questions first."

"Has Aubree bitten her?"

"No. Other than getting her to take the cats, and vague responses to her emails, we've kept our distance from her and the rest of your friends. We also stopped responding to any emails from any of them."

"I see," I said coldly. "Why? Were you going to send them word I'd been killed in some accident?"

"No," Solange replied. "We stopped responding when I knew I was going to unpackage you. I knew you would come away weak, and anyone can see in one glance you're not your old self. You've been terribly sick, but now you're on the mend. But recovery is going to take a while."

"Oh. I'm sorry I thought the worst."

"Well." She already looked unsettled, but it grew. "If unpackaging you went poorly, then yes, we would have announced your death."

"Oh."

"That's upsetting to both of us," she added. "Rock and hard place, Sidney. Please don't get upset."

"Don't get upset that my former lover can talk so casually about killing me?" I turned away. "You can't be serious."

"Sidney, do you want to fight about that now?"

"I suppose not. We'll just chalk it up to another wedge between us. I will point out I didn't put that one there, either. You get full credit for it."

I still didn't look at her. "You said you wanted to talk about Dolores."

"I am not quite ready to grant your request."

"I see."

"I was going to ask if you would allow me to call her on your behalf."

I turned back. "And tell her what?"

"What we just discussed. I received word you were sick. I don't have details, except that you're going to be fine. You'll be coming home, but they wouldn't say when."

"You're going to let me see my friends?"

"We'll be talking about that," she replied. "Yes, it is my intention to allow you as much of your old life as I am able."

"My job?"

"That, too. When you're stronger. You'll be on part time for a while. We'll discuss it in a few weeks. I was thinking of starting a software firm, but I'm not ready to talk about it with you yet."

"So you'll start a firm and order me to work there?"

"No. But it may be a good solution, and we'll discuss whether the idea appeals to you. If it does, and if it makes economic sense, we'll do it together."

"I like working for myself, Solange."

"I don't want to get distracted. I'm not going to force you if you don't want to do this. But you're not going to be back to your old schedule any time soon."

I took a deep breath. "Fine. We were talking about Dolores."

"That's what I had about Dolores. Will you allow me to contact her?"

"Allow?"

"It means to give permission, Sidney. Really, if I know this word in a language other than my birth language, I'm sure you know this word."

"Very funny." I thought about it. "You won't let me do it?"

"Officially you're in the hospital in some ultra secret location."

"All right. Yes, if you can reassure her, I'd appreciate it. Thank you."

She nodded. "Of course. Now, rules."

"Wait." I paused. "I want Aubree to stay away from her. And you, too. What are we going to say about us?"

"I guess we had a fight."

"We had a fight, but I haven't moved home? Or are you going to let me move home?"

"I've kept care of your house, but I want you to sell it."

I stared at her. It took me a while to respond. "Boy, you're the queen of unsettling statements tonight. I thought we were just talking about letting me have my own life back."

"You need to be here for me to begin directing your dreams."

"I see. So when you say you'll let me go back to my old life, you don't really mean it."

"Sidney, please don't pick a fight tonight. I won't respond well."

I sighed. "You're forcing me to live in this wonderful mansion. I get my own suite. I'm not a vacuum packed meal anymore. I should be grateful. And I promised 'anything'. I should stop complaining."

"Your situation is admittedly unfair," Solange said. "And you're not one to accept a submissive role in a relationship."

"We don't have a relationship, Solange!"

"Sidney!" She growled. "Please!" Her fangs appeared, and she hissed. "God damn it!" She covered her mouth with her hand.

I lowered my eyes. "I'm sorry. Why are you so ragged?"

"This situation is almost as hard for me as it is for you, Sidney," she said. Her voice was rough. "Please don't turn that statement into a fight."

It was probably a good thing she said that, as I was about to strongly disagree with it.

"I am just as frightened as you are," she added. "And I grieve our relationship as much as you do. Furthermore, I know that my decisions are going to upset you. I know everything about what's going on upsets you. And I'm making these decisions anyway."

"You feel guilty?"

"Yes!" she spat. "I feel guilty. I've felt guilty for seven months. I'm going to continue to feel guilty. More than guilty. I'm sick to my stomach over this, Sidney."

I looked up. "You could just trust me."

"I am."

"You could trust me completely."

"I am."

"It doesn't feel like it."

"God damn it, Sidney!" she spat. "I didn't bind you. You are no longer restrained. You have run of the house, within the limits of your strength."

"You won't let me call my friends, and I bet you're going to continue to isolate me from them, anyway. It's not like I'm going to host card and dinner parties here anymore."

"Why not?"

"Oh please," I said. "We can't go three minutes without fighting. But I sold my house to live here forever? Who is going to believe that? What story are we going to concoct?"

"I wouldn't have to be here."

"So the only time I see my friends is when you aren't around? That just means it will take a few weeks instead of a few minutes for everyone to wonder what happened between us. As is, even if I see them elsewhere, they're going to wonder."

She sighed. "You're right. We have things to figure out. I'm not keeping you from Dolores because I'm afraid you'll betray me, Sidney. I'm keeping you from her so that we can avoid these questions while we work them out. I can't let anyone see you yet, because I can't imagine what you could have had that would have left you as weak as you are. You need to be stronger before anyone sees you."

I stared at my hands again then said quietly, "If you don't want me thinking the worst, you should perhaps tell me everything up front."

"You're right. I told you, I'm ragged. I am making mistakes."

I looked up at her. Her fangs were still out. "Should you go eat?"

"Probably, but I didn't want to let this wait. You asked to talk to Dolores, and I thought I should respond to that."

"And tell me my rules."

"Yes. You have the run of the house, but I expect you to respect my privacy. You will not touch a telephone or computer for now. I believe the temptation to communicate with some of your friends may be too much for you, and I don't want you to do that until you have seen and absorbed the communications I've had with them on your behalf. And I want us to agree on how much you're going to tell them."

I nodded understanding.

"You will not go outside unless I take you."

"Why that rule?"

"I don't want you seen."

"Anything else?"

"Just the things you know. Do your therapy. Get stronger. Get healthy. Tell me about your dreams."