Safe & Sound (17 page)

“When are we leaving on Sunday?” Lanie asked over dinner.

“Leaving?” I asked.

“Yes. I have to catch a flight back to New York and Lanie needs to get back to her practice and her new wife,” Stella said to tease Lanie, who just stuck out her tongue.

“I’m not going back,” I said after a couple of moments.

“What do you mean you’re not going back?” Lanie asked.

“For the first time in months, I feel at peace. This is where I am meant to be. I just know it,” I said, looking eagerly at both Stella and Lanie who were giving each other side-glances.

“I don’t know if I can stay—” Stella started to say.

“No. No one needs to stay with me. Jay bought this house so that we would be able to enjoy it and I feel at home here. The house back in Greensboro just makes me sad,” I said. Lanie finally nodded while Stella still looked unconvinced.

“Just for a couple weeks … maybe the summer,” I added quickly, trying to convince her.

“I don’t know,” Stella mumbled.

“Look, the house is unfinished. Paul said there were enough funds to finish the remodeling in the account that Jay set up.” I still didn’t know where he had got the funds, but that didn’t matter at that moment. “Someone will need to be here to supervise that, right?” I added, feeling that a more logical reason for my staying would convince Stella.

“I suppose you are right. I will call Paul on Monday to set up the logistics of the fund and find out who the contractor was,” Stella said. I grinned at both of them, knowing I had just won a huge battle in gaining back my freedom. We pulled the sheets off the sofa in the living room and I settled in with a book for the evening. I could hear Lanie’s muffled voice in the other room on the phone with Mary Elizabeth and Stella sat at the kitchen table, working on her laptop. Shortly after 10 I got up and said goodnight and headed up to my room.

On Saturday morning we awoke to the rumble of thunder and an impending storm that had blown in overnight. After breakfast, Stella and Lanie decided to head into town to do some shopping and look around. I stayed behind and started unpacking some of the boxes. When Stella and Lanie returned, they had several large shopping bags in hand. When I inquired about the shopping trip, they shooed me upstairs.

“Jill, you can come down now,” Lanie called up the stairs after several hours.

“You both know I hate surprises,” I said, coming down the stairs. As I came into the living room, I stopped in my tracks and my hand immediately covered my mouth.

“Surprise!” Stella and Lanie shouted from the other side of the room. They had rearranged the living room furniture and moved several boxes out of the way, making it look more like a room. In addition, the room was now decorated with accent lamps, throw pillows, photographs and several other items that weren’t there earlier.

“I love it,” I finally said, fighting back tears.

“No crying,” Stella said, handing me a glass of wine.

“You guys didn’t have to do this,” I said, pointing at all the décor.

“Yes, we did. If this is where you want to make your new home, we want to support you,” Lanie said.

“Help you get started in the decorating department. You know we love to shop. We didn’t have time to paint but this is what we suggest,” Stella added, handing me several paint chips.

“Thank you,” I simply said, taking another look at the transformation. We settled in at the kitchen table for the dinner they had again picked up in town and talked well into the night. It felt like old times.

CHAPTER 21

I
promised Stella and Lanie I would be fine. I again told them I wasn’t ready to go home, back to the home Jay and I had made. There was so much work to do finishing up the house and unpacking I knew it would help me keep my mind off of everything. It also helped that I promised to call Stella and Lanie at least once a day.

“I don’t think my own mother mothered me as much as you two do,” I said Sunday morning as we packed up the car.

“You have the whole summer in front of you,” Lanie mused. Lanie and Stella had spent almost eight months babysitting me and the separation was turning bittersweet. But I knew as well as they did that they needed to return to their respective careers and lives. We arranged that they would come back for a long weekend at the end of the summer over Labor Day weekend and Lanie promised to bring Mary Elizabeth.

“Considering …” Stella left her thought hanging. “It has truly been the best time I have had in a long time. I can’t believe I have to go back to the real world, for real.” For Stella the real world meant mergers and acquisitions in New York. I wasn’t convinced that it was the real world.

“I can’t believe you were able to get all this time off,” I said, thinking of all the weeks they each had spent by my side.

“Roger owes me a favor,” she said, winking at me. She was referring to one of the managing partners at her firm.

“Everyone owes you a favor,” Lanie commented.

“Hey, I can’t help it if I’m good at uncovering secrets.” She winked again.

“You mean blackmail,” Lanie fired back.

“Lanie, blackmail is illegal. I should know. I’m a lawyer,” Stella said, placing extra emphasis on the word lawyer.

“Ladies, do we need to fight now?”

Back in high school Lanie and Stella were notorious for their epic fights over morals, ethics and boys. I can remember this one time when they didn’t speak for an entire three months over a boy named Chad Goffrey. Stella claimed they were on the verge of going steady and Lanie claimed that she had confessed her massive crush to Stella weeks earlier and that Stella was trying to date him just to spite her. It was never really resolved, but after weeks of silent treatment, they both came to their senses and things went back to normal.

“You’re right. Jill, are you gonna be okay here by yourself? Are you sure you want to stay?” Lanie asked.

“She is going to be just fine. We are just a phone call away.” Stella mimicked a phone with her hand as she walked around the car to give me a giant hug.

“Love you,” she whispered in my ear. She then quickly turned and got into the driver’s seat and started the car. Stella was never good with sentimental things.

“Oh Jill,” Lanie whined.

“Lanie, I’ll be okay, I promise. I’m not ready to go back.” I grabbed her in a big hug before any tears had a chance to escape.

“I love you both. Thank you for everything.” Words were never going to be enough for what they had done for me, but they were a start. We waved our good-byes and I stood there and watched them disappear down the road.

For the first time in almost eight months I was alone. I turned back up toward the house and stared, wondering what next. Jay and I always had a plan. We were driven, and we were focused on our future. Now here I was, staying in a half-refinished house on the beach, bought for me by my dead husband. I shook my head slowly, not believing the huge turn of events my life had taken, and headed back into the house. I slowly wandered through the living room and kitchen, touching the boxes that still were stacked up in different areas. Stella had hung soft mint-colored drapes over the large windows, claiming that some privacy was needed. I held the material in my fingers and let the materials glide through my fingers as I passed through the French doors onto the back deck and stared out into the ocean. In the distance I could hear people talking and the soft sounds of a guitar. The ocean waves continued to crash onto the beach and I wondered how I would move on. How do you pick up the pieces when your future was stolen from you but you still have your whole life ahead of you? I sighed and sat down in one of the chairs on the deck, taking in the peaceful evening …

“One step at a time,” I thought.

CHAPTER 22

I
shivered under the cool breeze as I tried to reach for a blanket. Jerking awake, I realized I had fallen asleep on the deck. Standing and stretching, I made my way back into the house, locking the doors behind me. I finally made my way into the bedroom and turned the bedside light out, unable to think about all the events that had taken place. Laying my head down on the pillow, I closed my eyes and willed myself to fall into a dreamless sleep. A noise startled me. Glancing at the clock on the bedside table, I could see that it was just past three in the morning. Deep within the house I could hear creaking and while all reason told me it was nothing, my mind started to race about the many possibilities. Another strange noise made me sit up in bed. Fear and dread invaded my mind and made my limbs heavy. After several minutes, I heard no other sound and lay back down in bed. Staring up at the dark ceiling, I cursed my parents and their love of watching crime stories late at night. As a child I would sneak out of bed and perch myself at the top of the stairs and listen to
Unsolved Mysteries
. Looking back, I knew why I wasn’t allowed to watch this show and maybe why my dad liked it too much. Fatigue returned, overwhelming me and causing me to fall back asleep. Suddenly, I heard another unfamiliar noise inside the house. This time I could swear I could hear footsteps. My breathing quickened and my heart raced as I leaned over and turned the bedside light back on. Willing myself to move, I slid out from under the covers and crouched next to the bed. I sat in silence, waiting for another noise. After several minutes, I slowly crawled around the edge of the bed toward the bedroom door. Where was my phone? I could be about to meet a burglar or worse yet a serial killer and I had no way to call for help. Making a mental note that I should start carrying my phone to bed and possibly invest in buying a baseball bat, I pushed the bedroom door open and moved out into the hallway. I reached up from my perch on the floor and turned the hallway light on.

“Hello?” I called out in a shaky voice, “is anyone there?”

No answer. Gaining a small amount of confidence, I slowly stood and continued to move throughout the house. I turned on every light I could find. As I made my way through the living room, the curtains rustled when a slight breeze came through the open window. I froze in place, waiting for any sudden movements. When I felt confident that there wouldn’t be any, I moved quickly to the windows, slamming them shut and locking them. Sighing with relief, I grabbed my phone from the kitchen table and made my way back through the house, resigning myself to leave several lights on just in case.

As I climbed the stairs back to the bedroom, I tried to reason with my fear. I knew it was irrational to think that someone was in my house. The crime rate on Oak Island was low and home invasions usually only occurred after the summer months when vacation homes stood vacant. I was in a safe town and a safe neighborhood, but as the adrenaline coursed through my body, I found it harder and harder to convince myself. I went back into the bedroom and stared at the bed. My half was disheveled and the blankets were strewn about. What would have been Jay’s side of the bed was still neatly made. I had felt so safe with him by my side. I had never feared noises, let alone the dark. Overcome with fatigue, again, I stumbled into bed, pulling the sheets up. I leaned over for the second time that night and turned the light off on the bedside table. As the soft glow left the room, the house seemed to come alive again. My mind started to race and my imagination ran wild. Leaning over, again, I turned the bedside light on, and checked my phone to make sure it had service. I slipped it under the pillow. The house settled again and I lay back down. Strangely, I felt safe with the lights on. I rolled over and drifted off to sleep.

The sun filtered in through the bedroom windows. I stretched and fumbled under my pillows for my phone. It was still early. I reached over and turned off the bedside light that was still on. Sighing to myself, I rolled over and stared up at the ceiling. I had my whole day ahead of me. Correction: I had my whole life ahead of me, but where did I start? Stretching and getting out of bed, I walked to the floor-length windows that lined my bedroom and, for the first time in months, I knew what I wanted to do. I picked through the clothes that were strewn across the floor and dressed in my running shorts and tank top. I grabbed my Boston Red Sox cap and headed down the stairs. I found my running shoes on the back deck and headed out toward the beach. Moving one step at a time, one foot in front of the other, I slowly made my way down the beach on what would end up being a three-mile run.

My breathing was finally slowing as I stretched on the back deck. I could hear my phone ringing back inside the house. I got up, dashed inside and tried to find it.

“Hello? Lanie?”

“Jill, are you okay?”

“Yea, I’m fine. Why?”

“Well, I called a little bit ago and you didn’t answer.”

“I was out on a run. I didn’t take my phone with me.”

“You were running?” Shock sounded in her voice and I can tell she had been sidetracked her from her original purpose.

“Yes. What can I help you with this morning?” I needed to keep her on task.

“Listen, yesterday when we left, Stella got lost—”

“Shocking.” How Stella made it from point A to B still amazed me.

“I know, right?”

“I was not lost. Just taking a more scenic route.” I could hear Stella in the background sounding like her defiant self.

“Well, anyway, we got lost and Stella missed her flight. We stayed in a local hotel last night and Stella is about to get on another flight this morning from Greensboro to New York, but I have some business in the area that has just come up, so I’m not leaving for another couple of days. Do you mind if I stay at your house?”

I could sense the hesitation in her voice. Did I mind?

“No, not at all. There is a spare key in a hideaway rock by the back porch,” I said.

“Do you need me to do anything while I am there?” she asked.

“No, I’m fine.”

“Thanks, Jill.”

“No problem.” I ended the call and made my way upstairs to shower and get dressed.

It was after two in the afternoon and I had all the windows open and a soft breeze drifted through the house. After piddling around the house most of the morning, moving boxes from one room to another, I finally decided to move up to my bedroom and unpack the boxes up there. I pulled the first box from the top of the pile and started unloading more sheets and towels. The next box held items that were to be used to decorate the bathroom. I had to laugh to myself at the thought of Jay shopping at all these online stores and selecting all these items down to the smallest detail. The box on the bottom of the pile held pictures and a large canvas of three brightly painted sailboats. I set the canvas down and went looking for a hammer and nails I knew I had seen before Stella and Lanie had had their redecorating party. After locating what I was looking for, I found several cans of paint, each a distinct color. Many were labeled for specific rooms in the house. I stared at the paint cans for a long time and then glanced around the house. For the second time that day I knew what I wanted to do and I searched for my phone and called Lanie.