Resolution (Saviour) (23 page)

He slides up my body and slams his mouth on mine, both his hands holding my face so I can’t
move my face.

“
Never, I would not, I will never leave you” he sobs into my mouth.

He lifts me up as I wrap my legs around him and slides into me as I am pressed into the corner of the shower but it’s not enough, I want him harder, faster
, I want it to hurt so that I know for sure that he is really here. Gabe slides to the floor and sits back on his knees as he fills me completely; I keep my legs wrapped around him but my feet on the floor as he holds onto my hips, helping me move up and down; I dig my nails into his shoulders as I lean away from him and look right into tired, bloodshot, beautiful, blue eyes.

“
You left me,” I sob again.

“
I love you, I will never leave you, never, do you hear me, I fucking love you Lauren, always, forever and always.”

He’s crying as hard as I am, I take his face in my ha
nds and he does the same to me and without breaking eye contact and without barely moving, we come, together, he almost kisses me to death, my mouth, my cheeks, my eyes, nose, I can hardly get a breath in as his mouth smothers me again. He puts one hand on the wall for balance and carries me out of the shower and the bathroom, into the bedroom and lays me on the bed. He’s grabbed two towels on the way and wraps one around his hips as he stands and one around me as he pulls me into his lap and begins to dry me. I look up into his handsome face and run my hand over his jaw, enjoying the feel of his whiskers; I push my thumb into the dimple of his chin and up to brush over his bottom lip, he drags his teeth over it and flicks his tongue over the pad and I let out a slight moan at his actions and within a split second I am on my back and he is in me…

An hour later, I am on top of him, straddling his hips, his finally softening cock still inside me; my knees are bent up either side of him, my head resting on his
chest, both his arms are around me as he strokes over my back and my arse cheeks, he kisses my head and my hair continuously. “She said it was my fault, she said I helped put her there.”

He goes completely still, the
n pulls me so tightly to him I can hardly breathe, I struggle till I free myself from his grip and sit up, I need to see his face; he sits up with me so we are face to face.

“
You said nothing, she, she said that it was my fault and you said nothing, I called you, I called and I text and nothing, you just left me.” I manage not to cry, he grips the back of my hair and pulls me to him and kisses my forehead.

“
We have done nothing but argue, nonstop, she has threatened all sorts, she said that she would stop Ava coming to stay with us, she…she’s jealous of you Lauren, even before the accident, she hates how well you and Ava get along and she’s made a few snide comments these last few months and then a couple of weeks ago, just after she had the new baby, her and Ava blued and Ava told her she wanted to come and live with us, she called me at work and said that we were brainwashing her daughter, trying to turn her against her and saying that she would go to court and stop me seeing her, I spoke to Dean, her husband, he said he thinks she’s suffering from post natal depression and she’s been behaving erratically for a while, he said he would talk to her. Then this all happened and she just hasn’t let up. If I had said anything, if I had defended you in front of her, I don’t know how it might have ended up.”

He gives me a little half smile
, “I know what you’re like, I thought you might punch her if she said anything, I had a vision of you smashing her around the head with your cast, which I actually wouldn’t mind but not there, not at my daughter’s bedside.” His eyes fill with tears and I hold him tighter. I understand why he said nothing a bit clearer now but he could have said something.

“
When you left, I wanted to come after you but I needed to put her straight so I stayed and told her, I told her that not only was I lucky to have found someone like you, someone that loved me unconditionally, despite my faults, my issues and my past, but I was lucky in that, in you, I had found someone that loved my daughter too, loved and treated my daughter as if she were her own and she had better wake up to herself and realise that it was you that I was with, you that I will be marrying and not one of the nameless skanks I’ve fucked my way through the past twenty years, who would never give a shit about Ava.”

He kisses me gently on the mouth
, “Don’t ever think that I think you are in any way to blame for that accident, it was what it was, an accident and please don’t ever think that I wouldn’t defend you, stick up for you against anyone, ever. That song, that song that’s been on repeat since I got here, listen to those words Lauren, listen to those words and try and understand exactly what you mean to me, what I would do for you.”

Poor old Adele is still in the bathroom singing the words that I want him to understand, I want him to get
it, I want him to know how I feel, “Works both ways Gabe, I had that song on repeat because it’s how I feel about you but you don’t seem to get it, the things you said to me about Jay, all the time, you always assume that I am going back to him, why, why would I ever do that?”

“
You were kissing him.”

“
I was not kissing him, he kissed me, there is a huge difference.”

“
You married him, you stayed married to him but you won’t marry me.”

“
Yes I will.”

“
Despite everything he did, for all these…What, what did you say?”

“
I said, yes I will, I will marry you, if you still want to marry me.”

“
Lauren, seriously. Don’t fuck with me.”

“
Gabe, I’m not fucking with you, if you still want me, then yes I will marry you.”

He flips me onto my back and slides off the bed
and onto the floor; he pulls me up into a sitting position as he kneels in front of me, between my legs and takes hold of my left hand and looks up at me.

“
Lauren, I want to do this properly, I want to blow you away, I want there to be fireworks and champagne but mostly I just want you to know, I want you to understand exactly what you mean to me… we, us, what we have is beyond anything I think either of us could ever have imagined or hoped for, you are my other half, without you I just exist, I need you to make me more, to make me a better person. You are beautiful both inside and out, you are funny and sexy, you are clever, warm and loving, you have a temper as fiery as your red hair and you both swear and snore like a wharfie. You can drink most men under the table and you have the best pair of tits, ever; every single day you make me feel worthy. You see beyond my face, which let’s face it can’t be easy, because it is just stunning, you deal with my past and the shit you have to deal with because of it and every day, no matter what, you keep loving me and you keep making me feel that I am worth loving. I absolutely promise you here and now, I will spend the rest of my life, loving, worshiping and adoring you and I promise that at every opportunity I will have you coming like a steam train. Please, will you marry me?”

I give him a shrug and a small smile
, “Yes, yes I will marry you.”

He kisses across my
knuckles, “Thank you, I won’t let you down.”

“
You better not”.

“
Can we go to the hospital and tell Ava.”

“
Of course we can.”

Shit, he’s been here a couple of hours and I haven’t even asked how his daughter is, I assumed if there was any change he would have told me and he hasn’t said a word.

We arrive back at the hospital half an hour later and my stomach flips over as we walk into her room and I see Nina sitting at her bedside, Gabe squeezes my hand tight for reassurance.

“
What’s she doing here?”

“
She’s come to see Ava and give her some news, you can either stay or you can go, it’s up to you.”

“
No. I’ll stay, I want to hear whatever shit she has to say.”

“
Please yourself.”

We both approach Ava’s bed, she is off of all the breathing equipment I notice and she just looks like she’s sleeping
, “Ava baby, Laurens come back to see you and we have some news, we wanted you to be the first to know…”

I motion for Gabe to shush so I can speak
, “Ava, I need you to wake up and get better, because baby girl, I need you to be my bridesmaid when I marry your Dad, and if you don’t wake up, well then Stella will just take over and I need you so bad to be on team Lauren.”

“
Dya hear that Bub, she finally said yes, you told me to just keep asking and she would say yes and finally, finally Lauren said it.”

“
You are joking right?”

Nina is standing behind us, sneering
, “You aren’t really going to marry him are you? Only he doesn’t really have a great track record on that front and FYI… if you are stupid enough to go ahead with it…don’t be expecting sex on your wedding night, or any night after for that matter.”

“
What is your problem sweetheart?”

Gabe shakes his head at me
, “No, no Gabe, I kept quiet the other day so there wouldn’t be a scene but not today, she’s not going to spoil the beautiful love we just made or the amazing proposal speech you just gave, so I’m just curious Nina, what is your problem, is it me? Are you jealous of me, of me being with Gabe, or my relationship with Ava? You stand there making all of these assumptions about what our marriage will be like when really and truly, you barely know Gabe and you most certainly don’t know me but just to make things nice and clear I need you to know that Gabe and I will be getting married, Ava will be part of our wedding and will remain part of our lives, not because she is Gabe’s daughter but because we love her and want her to be part of our lives, she won’t ever be used as a pawn by us, we will never threaten to take her away from you, she will come and stay with us of her own choosing and FYI, we, me and him, Gabe and I, we fuck like rabbits, we will fuck like rabbits on our wedding night and we will spend the rest of our married lives working our way through the Karma Sutra and every other sex manual you care to mention – while fucking like rabbits, and you know why that is? Because he loves me, he wants to marry me and be with me, because he loves me, not because I’m knocked up and threatening to take his child away from him.”

I stand and stare at the sour faced bitch, shaking from head to toe, suddenly aware of the grip Gabe has on my shoulder
, “You can let go babe, I won’t hit her. Not in here anyway.”

I turn and look at him over my shoulder and I can see he’s trying not to laugh or even
smile; he pulls me around and kisses me full on the mouth, “I fucking love you. Future Mrs Wilde.”

“
Is this how you usually carry on in front of my daughter? Kissing and fucking in front of…”

“
Can you all please stop shouting and talking about sex? It’s gross and making my head hurt.”

The human body is an amazing thing; the way the do
ctors explained it to us was that Ava’s brain stayed asleep just for the amount of time it needed to heal, then it woke up, basically when she was better. She was kept in the hospital over the weekend so they could get her eating again and she was allowed home on Tuesday; I left that to Gabe and Nina to do and stayed out of the way. Charlie’s funeral was being held the following day and Ava was insisting that she wanted to go, Nina was adamant she was no way going and Gabe felt she should just be allowed to the church service to say her goodbyes and then come home, needless to say, it was the cause of yet another argument between them and I didn’t want to be stuck in the middle of it.

I actually agreed with Gabe, she needed her chance to say goodbye; I was thirteen when my
Granddad died and my parents had flown back to England for the funeral and decided, on my behalf, that I didn’t need to go, I begged and cried but we had only been in Australia a few months and my Mum insisted it would be too unsettling for me, considering I was planning on running away and hiding somewhere like Southend or Clacton as soon as the funeral was over, her decision was probably the right one but I do remember for years wishing I’d had the chance to say goodbye and I have dreams even to this day that he somehow came back and I’m sure it’s because I never had a chance to say goodbye. Who knows, I’m not a shrink, but I bet I’m not far wrong and I didn’t want Ava having the same issues I had accepting that her Granddad was gone for good, she was close to Charlie and I just think she should have the right to say goodbye but rather than almost coming to blows with the nasty shrew, Nina, I stayed out of it.

It’
s about two o’clock Tuesday afternoon when I finally hear the gates and the garage open, I’d had Jemma and Lu visit me this morning and had fallen asleep on the sofa after they had gone; I sit up slowly as I am having a few dizzy spells but the hospital had said it was normal after a concussion but to call them if they persisted or if I felt nauseous, I have felt a little sick occasionally but it isn’t anything too severe and I don’t want to make a fuss.