“Come here.” He took her hand, guiding her into the middle of the floor.
“What are you doing?”
“Shh, just chill.” Wrapping his arms around her waist, they danced to Donny Hathaway's, “I Love You More Than You'll Ever Know”.
“I'm sorry for pushing you away.”
“It's cool.” He stroked her hair.
“I hate that you're making me feel so calm right now.”
“Why? That's a good thing.”
“Nothing in my life has ever been calm. I don't know how to react when things are going good.”
“Look, I ain't out to hurt or lie to you. If you haven't noticed, I love your ass like crazy.”
She flashed him a smile of contentment and laid her head on his chest as they swayed together in sync.
“Ay, blow out those candles for me,” Mills asked, letting her go as the song went off. At first she was about to throw another hissy fit, but after taking another glance around the room she thought different. Mills went through all the trouble to set up a private dinner for her in his house; the least she could do was blow out some candles.
“You know the words to this song mean a lot to me,” he said as the song played again
.
“They do?” she asked, surprised.
“Yeah, every time I listen to it, I think of you,” he said as he lit the fireplace.
“I don't know what to say.”
“You ain't got to say nothing ma, it's cool. I'm just letting you know that I never stopped loving you.”
“I never stopped loving you either, Mills.” Farrah turned around and smiled at him. She knew she was getting caught up in the moment, but she was saying the truth. A part of her never stopped loving him.
“To be honest with you, I have been thinking about you a lot lately. I just want to spend all my time with you.”
“Oh, so you want to spend all your time with me, huh?” Farrah replied.
“Yeah. I told you I want to be your man again,” he said, watching her stop to pick up a light blue box in front of one the candles.
“What's this?”
“Open it.” Biting down on her lip, she opened up the Tiffany box to find a diamond and platinum tennis bracelet.
“Mills!” Farrah exclaimed with her mouth wide open.
“I know we're not officially back together, but I wanted to give you something special. I don't expect you to give an answer right this second, but I want us to be back together. I promise to do all I can to be the man you deserve.”
Feeling like she was going to pass out, Farrah sat down on the floor to catch her breath. She didn't know what to do. Things were beginning to get out of control between her and Mills. She was so confused about how to interpret everything that was happenning. She was just supposed to be spending time with Mills to keep her occupiedânot to get back into a relationship with him. Thoughts of J.R. entered her mind, and her heart felt like it was about to burst. She felt torn between two lovers.
“
Whaaat?
Somebody shut up Farrah?” Mills teased, sitting down in front of her.
“This is moving too fast for me.”
“I know; it's moving fast for me too, but I can't help the way I feel, Farrah. I see you sitting here trying to be strong, but you don't have to do that. I got you and the quicker you admit it the better off you'll be.” He stroked her cheek.
“I guess . . .” She trembled at his touch.
“Nah, you know.” Mills kissed her lips roughly as Alicia Keys's “Diary” echoed throughout the room.
Mills placed his body on top of hers as he ran his tongue in circles across her neck. Farrah moaned. Caressing her breasts with his hand, he used the other to pull the straps of her dress down. Farrah was all too ready to get dick downed. After removing her dress, Mills planted small kisses all over her body.
Once he stopped at her thong, he looked up at her and gently removed them from her curvaceous hips. Surprised but pleased to see that her clit was swollen and extremely wet, he smiled. Taking his hand, Mills massaged her clit with his thumb. Not able to control herself anymore, Farrah began rotating her hips to Mills's rhythm.
Removing his thumb, he began to flick her clit with his tongue. Shivering shots of electricity coursed through her body. In absolute heaven, Farrah screamed from sheer ecstasy. Mills sucked her throbbing clit like there was no tomorrow, swirling his tongue up, down, from side to side, and around. Nearing her first orgasm, Farrah grabbed his head, begging for mercy. Not letting up, he inserted two fingers inside while still sucking her clit. Cumming in his mouth, Mills enjoyed the taste of her sweet juices.
Whimpering and moaning, she sucked his bottom lip. She wanted to taste the rest of him, so she licked his neck while she rubbed his back. She felt eager to get reacquainted with his body. Once she released the tool that was made to please her, he was completely naked.
Positioning herself between his legs, Farrah laid on top of him. In her hand was the one thing that she craved the most. Lowering her head, she placed her lips around the tip of his mammoth dick. She ran her tongue around the tip; then, while holding the shaft, she bobbed up and down. Her hand was her guide as she sucked his dick until his body began to convulse.
Knowing what this meant, she eased up, looked at him with lust in her eyes, and kissed him. Mills kissed her back so passionately, he began to scare himself. Taking control again, he placed himself in between Farrah's thighs. With one swift move he was inside of her. He pushed deep inside her vaginal walls as he gripped her waist and slid all the way to her soul.
“Ahh!” Farrah yelled as her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she tried to jerk her hips away from him.
Grabbing her hips to keep her from moving, Mills said, “You gon' quit fighting me now?”
“No,” she said, knowing her response would make Mills work harder at what he was trying to accomplish. Mills laughed and placed her feet on his shoulders. Lifting her ass off the floor, he thumbed Farrah's clit and began pounding harder and deeper into her pussyâa pussy that was a perfect fit for his dick.
“You gon' quit fighting me now?”
“Yes, baby, yes,” Farrah moaned in ecstasy as Mills's movements became faster. She grabbed his ass, wanting to cum with him. Their bodies moved together as they both came. After the mind-blowing orgasms, they were both drenched in sweat.
“Good,” Mills said as he kissed her lips.
Chapter 29
You don't love me like you used to.
-Brandy, “U Don't Know Me
 (Like U Used To)”
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“Where you going?” Jade asked, walking into Mills's private bathroom.
“Out,” he answered, not even bothering to look in her direction.
“Out where?” Jade snapped back.
“Why?” He screwed up his face and brushed his hair.
“'Cause I wanna know, that's why. What, you got something to hide?” Jade folded her arms across her chest.
“Nope,” Mills said, grinning.
“You think this shit is funny? It's a fuckin' Tuesday night. Where are you going?” Jade shot.
“Out wit' my homeboy Shawn. You don't know him,” Mills answered, lying.
“Yeah, I don't know him 'cause Shawn's ass probably a girl and her name is probably Shawna. I keep on telling you I'm not new to this shit,” Jade scoffed.
“Well, like always, you're wrong. I'm not fucking with no other woman but you.”
“Yeah and I'm boo-boo the fool. I don't give a fuck what you do as long as you're not fuckin' with Farrah.”
“Why not Farrah?” Mills questioned.
“'Cause I don't like that bitch and I know she got the potential to take you from me.”
“Ain't nobody taking me away from you. I keep tellin' you that,” Mills assured.
“Mmm-hmm,” Jade yawned, knowing damn well he was lying.
“I'm dead serious.” Mills placed his arms around her waist. “You my baby. You gon' always be my number one.”
“Yeah, until the next bitch wit' a pretty face comes along.”
“No true,” Mills objected.
“Okay, if it's not true, then stay at home with me,” Jade challenged.
“I can't. I got somewhere I need to be.” Mills turned back around and began grooming his face.
“Let me find out you fuckin' with Farrah again and I swear to god it's a wrap. Me and Jaysin will be up outta here so fast it'll make your head spin. As a matter of fact, now I don't want you to go,” she spat with an attitude.
“What?” Mills looked at her through the mirror like she was crazy.
“You heard me. Stay yo' ass at home.”
“You buggin'.” Mills chuckled, not taking her seriously.
“I'm not playin'.” Jade grabbed his keys off the bathroom counter. “You not going.”
“Give me back my keys, man. I ain't got time to be playin' wit' you.” Mills held out his hand, not in the mood.
“No!” She held them even tighter.
Mills glared at Jade, highly annoyed. This was just like the time she'd held him up from meeting with Farrah almost two years before. Him and Jade were barely a couple anymore and it was obvious she had somebody on the side, but the second it seemed Mills had found somebody it was a problem for her. Mills didn't have time to stand there and argue with her tonight. He was tired of this crazy cycle. He wasn't trying to go through all of that again.
“Mills . . . Mills!” Jade yelled, bringing him out of his thoughts. “I know you hear me!”
“I'ma tell you one more time before I have to fuck you up. Give me back my goddamn keys!” Mills snatched them from her hand.
“Think it's a game? You're not going!” Jade shouted, trying to figure out her next move.
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It was déjà vu. Farrah was dressed to the nines. Her hair was curled and expertly pinned up to cascade down the left side of her face. She wore a black jersey spaghetti-strap maxi-dress that clung to her breasts, hips, and thighs as if it were a second skin on her. The last thing she should have been doing was waiting on Mills to show up for their date. He was supposed to be there by 8:00 and it was now 9:30. Life could not be repeating itself again. She just hoped and prayed that she wasn't waiting on Mills while he was out somewhere with Jade. It would kill her to think she had put herself in the same predicament she was in before. Farrah remembered the night vividly. She remembered how dumb she felt sitting around waiting for Mills. And how when he got there he had the nerve to be upset with her for having an attitude about his lateness. That nostaligic feeling came over her as she thought back to that night.
Just like tonight, she had spent hours preparing for their date. After waiting for what seemed like days, he finally showed. Instead of apologizing or even acknowledging his lateness, he just strolled over the couch to sit. When Farrah contronted him about how late he was, it turned into a huge argument. After a long and frustrating throw down between the two, it ended up in a long night of passionate lovemaking and dirty sex.
Sitting on her couch reminiscing on her and Mills's past battles, Farrah unknowing fell asleep. It was almost 6:00 in the morning when she woke up still on her couch. Flabbergasted that it was the next day and she was still home dressed in her clothes, she checked her phone to see if Mills had called. To her dismay he hadn't called or texted. Farrah's heart sank to her feet. Mills had completely stood her up.
Mills had a history of picking her up late or canceling last minute, but he had never just not shown up without giving so much as a phone call or text to at least tell he couldn't make it.
I am so fuckin' stupid,
she thought. Farrah had somehow tricked herself into believing that Mills had changed. She almost believed him when he said he wouldn't hurt her anymore. But maybe something had happened. Maybe he or his daughter got sick and he couldn't call.
Yeah, that's it,
Farrah told herself.
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Later on that day Farrah and London strolled through Forever 21. Farrah was a fashionista. She loved all of the big-name designers, but she was also a girl who loved nice clothes that didn't break the bank. She'd found multiple cute pieces to add to her closet, but Farrah couldn't fully concentrate on shopping. Her mind kept going back to Mills standing her up. Although she was mad at first, now she wanted to make sure he was okay.
All morning and early afternoon she'd been blowing up his phone. Like J.R., he wouldn't answer. She didn't know if he was hurt or if something bad had happened. She did know that she was worried sick. While London was in the dressing room trying on clothes, she tried calling him again.
After what seemed like a million rings, Mills's voice mail clicked in. Farrah didn't even bother to leave a message. She just wished he'd let her know he was okay. London came out of the dressing room and instantly knew something was wrong with Farrah. She looked like she was about to puke.
“Okay.” London wrapped her arm around Farrah's shoulder. “What's wrong wit' you? Mama's here.”
“I'm good. What you talking about?” Farrah tried to switch her attitude up.
“Farrah, don't lie to me. You know you can't hide shit. You wear your emotions on your face.”
“Look, if I tell you, don't get to doing a bunch of extra shit, okay?” Farrah groaned.
“Scout's honor, as long as you ain't pregnant by that nigga.”
“No, I'm not pregnant. We've only smashed once. Me and Mills had plans last night and he stood me up,” Farrah said, looking down at the ground. She really didn't feel like looking at London's face because she knew she'd see disappointment all over it.
“Have you talked to him?” London quizzed.
“No, he won't answer the phone.”
“Well, you haven't heard shit, so his ass ain't in the hospital or dead, so his ass okay. If something had happened, we would have heard it on the radio or seen it on the news. He's just on some bullshit. He probably with another chick,” London revealed, not knowing how much her words stabbed Farrah in the heart.
“You think he was with Jade?”
“What, you don't?” London asked, mockingly.
Farrah sighed.
“I know you don't actually believe that he's stopped fuckin' with other bitches, especially Jade?”
“I mean, we never discussed it. I just assumed.”
“Well, you know what they say about assuming. You make an ass outta yourself. Girl, yes, he's still fuckin' with her and they still stay together. You have officially been reduced from being the wife to the mistress,” London stated bluntly.
“Damn,” was all Farrah could reply.