Nobody's Girl (24 page)

When the words
I'm done
met with her ears, tears flooded her eyes. For some strange reason she'd tricked herself into believing that he'd forgive her or maybe that was the lie she told herself to get through the night. She never deserved to have a man like J.R. in her life. She was damaged goods. Her heart had been broken too many times to believe that true love could really exist for her. All she knew were tear-filled nights and unkept promises.

No man she ever dated loved her enough to stay. They all took her love and devotion for granted. No man ever treated her like the precious stone she thought she was. Every time J.R. told her how beautiful she was and how much he loved her, she never truly believed it. Now because of her distrust in men she'd lost one of the great ones.

-
Mýa featuring Jay-Z, “Best of Me (Remix)”

 

“Oh my god,” Farrah peeked out of the window at the paparazzi, who swarmed her house.

“They've been out there all day. You would think they would've found a better story to write about by now.” She closed the blinds.

“They will,” London said, drily.

She was on the living room couch, eating popcorn and watching
106 & Park
. She was hardly in the mood to hear Farrah whine about the drama she'd created.

“This shit is getting out of hand, though,” Farrah replied, oblivious to her friend's attitude. “Everywhere I go, they're there. I can't stay cooped up in this house forever. I have to get back to work.”

“You sure in the fuck do. I'm tired of picking up your slack,” London shot.

“You act like me missing work is my fault.” Farrah sat beside her on the couch.

“Umm . . . bitch, it is,” London said, mad as hell.

“How? It's not my fault that some nosy muthafucka took a picture of me and Mills leaving the party together.”

“That's the thing. You shouldn't have been leaving with his ass in the first place. I told you not to fuck with him, but
noooo
, yo' big-head ass is hardheaded. Now look, your ass can't even leave the house and our business—” London pointed her hand back and forth between them—“is suffering. Ain't nobody got time for that.”

“London, it's easy for you to say
leave him alone and don't fuck with him
,” Farrah mocked her voice. “'Cause you've never had a husband.”

“And bitch, neither have you,” London snapped. “When are you going to get that Mills is a grimy person and definitely not the person for you? I'm so tired of seeing women try to make shit work with fuckin' niggas that ain't even worthy enough to tie they shoes. Like I told you before, nothing about Mills has changed. Hell, he probably has got worse because now he sees how big of a dummy you are.”

“Whoa-whoa-whoa! Flag on the field. “ Farrah signaled her hands like an NFL referee. “Your ass is going too far. You just violated the friendship code, my nigga. I'm dumb now? That really hurt my feelings,” Farrah said, genuinely hurt.

“I'm sorry friend.” London reached over and patted her hand. “I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, but you are stupid, though.” She cracked up laughing.

“Fuck you.” Farrah threw up her middle finger. “Who knows, I probably am—”

“You are,” London interjected.

“But I can't for the life of me escape these feelings I have,” Farrah continued on. “I love J.R., I do and I would give anything to make it work, but he's made it crystal clear that he ain't fuckin' wit' me.”

“And he shouldn't,” London agreed.

“Make me feel worse, why don't you.”

“I'm just saying, you lost one,” London mimicked Chrisette Michele's voice.

“I know I did.” Farrah stared off into space somberly. “I don't know . . . it's just something inside of me that's confused and fucked up. I want to be happy, but I don't know how to get there.”

“Maybe this is why things didn't work out between you and J.R. Maybe you have to find your happy before you can truly be with him.”

 

 

Mills had only been put of the house a little over a week, but for him that was a week too long. He didn't realize how much he'd grown to love his family until he was forced to be away from them. He hadn't been able to wake up and see his daughter's beautiful face or be able to roll over and sample some of Jade's sweet nectar. He couldn't say that he was madly in love with Jade anymore, but he did care for her greatly.

No matter how you cut it, she was permanent fixture in his life. At one point they had a solid relationship, then she cheated and everything turned to shit. Mills hadn't been the same since. He would never put himself in the position to be hurt again. After Jade played him to the left and treated him like shit, a piece—if not most—of his heart died.

Mills realized that the world was a cold, selfish muthafucka and that you could truly trust no one. He loved Farrah when they were together and really didn't want her to leave, but by the time they got married Mills had already spiraled down the rabbit hole of only giving a fuck about himself. It sucked that everyone around him had to be a causality of his selfish ways, but Mills wasn't here to pacify feelings anymore.

The only thing he cared about was securing his own happiness and if that meant he had to lie or cheat, then so be it. Mills knew that in order to get back into the house peacefully he had to tell Jade what she wanted to hear. On that cold night he escorted her out to a lovely, romantic dinner at Scape. Scape was his go-to spot when he was trying woo chicks. Jade pretended as if she wasn't going out, but secretly she was doing cartwheels inside.

The fact that she could put Mills out of his own house and he still came running back to her was a turn-on. Mills's constant attention made her feel special and wanted. But she could never let him see how weak she truly was. She had to continue to show him her poker face. For it to have been a Friday night the restaurant wasn't as packed as it normally was. Mills sat across from Jade and ordered a nice bottle of wine from the bar. While they waited he and Jade began to chat.

“I wonder, is Jaysin asleep yet?” Jade looked at her watch. “I should call the babysitter and see how she's doing.” Jade reached for her phone.

“Naw, chill. She's a'ight. If she wasn't we would've received a phone call by now.”

“Okay.” She put her phone up. “I just get so nervous whenever I leave her.”

“That's natural. You're her mother, but right now you're with her father and Daddy needs some attention.”

“That's Daddy's problem. It's always about what Daddy wants, fuck everybody else.”

“Not true. None of this tonight is about me. This is all about you.”

“Who do you think you're fooling, Mills? My ass wasn't born yesterday. This is about your ass wanting to come home.”

“You do realize that I can come home anytime I want. It is my house,” Mills said, sarcastically.

“You love throwing that shit up in my face, don't you? We all know that's your raggedy-ass house.” Jade curled her upper lip.

“I'm just stating facts so you can understand it's not about that. Me taking you out to dinner is about me trying to show you that I love you and that I care.” Mills gazed deep into her eyes.

“What I did with Farrah wasn't cool. It was a one-time thing and I shouldn't have done it, but I can't take it back. What I can do is tell you that I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done you like that. You've been nothin' but good to me since we started back fuckin' around.”

“You can say that again,” Jade agreed.

“Straight up.” Mills reached across the table and took her hand. “I love you and I choose you. I don't want anybody else. All I want is you and Jaysin. Y'all are my family. Farrah or no other broad can come between that.”

Jade wanted to react joyfully about Mills choosing her, but what kind consolation prize was that? Sure, he wanted her 'cause being with her meant he'd have access to his daughter, in- house pussy, a clean house, and a home-cooked meal everyday. Jade was no fool. She knew Mills's MO. The sad part was she didn't care. At that stage in her life she was content with the bullshit.

She understood that men were incapable of being with only one woman. In Jade's eyes all men cheated. It was the nature of the beast. No matter how hard a woman tried, a man just couldn't be tamed. They only knew how to be savage beasts. Being a woman you had to learn how to adapt to their environment or be left behind. Jade chose to adapt.

She was the kind of chick who thoroughly enjoyed the perks of dating a rich and successful man. Motherhood hadn't curbed her appetite for the finer things in life. Balmain, Lanvin, and Jimmy Choo stayed calling her name. She loved living a lavish lifestyle. Being with Mills afforded her the ability to be a stay-at-home mom. She didn't have to lift a finger if she didn't want to. Jade could be pretty and fly at all times.

Besides, her life now was a far better cry then how it was when she first met Mills. Suddenly Jade got a flashback of being in Atlanta at the infamous Magic City strip club. The year was 2002. Mills and his crew were seated right by the stage in brown leather chairs, getting fucked up. Mills was higher then a muthafucka. He'd just won his first race and he was out celebrating. All the ATL playas were out that night.

Usher, Jermaine Dupri, Ludacris, and T.I were there showing him love. Mills had already wasted five grand buying out the bar and throwing money on stage. To him the night couldn't get any better. Then the in-house DJ got on the mic and announced that the feature dancer of the night was about to hit the stage.

“Yo' watch this bitch that's about to come out,” his boy Buck said.

“Please welcome to the stage Xtacy!”

Then through the speakers the words,
“All the chronic in the world couldn't even mess wit' you, you're the ultimate high. Here what I'm saying baby, Now check this out.”

Focusing his eyes on the stage, Mills watched as Xtacy crawled to the middle of the stage like a feline. Jodeci's “Feenin'” was playing as she eyed the crowd through her piercing black, slanted eyes. Immediately Mills was drawn to her. Xtacy wasn't like most strippers. She didn't come out pussy poppin' and sticking bottles in her coochie. She had a sense of sensuality about her. All of her movements were slow and catlike.

Unlike the other strippers who performed in the usual stripper attire of nothing but leather and spandex, Xtacy wore an all-black lace halter baby-doll top with matching black G-string panties from Agent Provocateur. Her hair and makeup wasn't wild or crazy-looking either. Everything was tastefully done. Just a simple wrap, smoky eyes, and Chanel lip gloss for her. To complete the ensemble she wore bronze body butter and black five-inch stilettos. The men were awestruck, to say the least. She looked like a naughty angel sent from heaven.

While K-Ci sang the words, “
Take my money, my house and my cars”
Xtacy twirled around the pole wondering who would be her victim that night. The club was filled with ballas so she had a lot of men to choose from. Making eye contact with Mills, she smiled. He was the perfect prey, dripping with ice, high as hell, and drunk as a skunk. Rolling over onto her back all the while still holding her gaze, Xtacy parted her legs.

Mills was in the high-rollers' section so she made sure to give him all she had. With her head arched back she looked at him and ran her wet tongue across her glossy upper lip. Rotating her hips, she began to play with her pussy. Mills didn't know if he was high and trippin' or was it the yak taking its effect, but he could have sworn she was staring at him. He had to make sure what he was thinking was true so he winked at her. Sure enough, she winked back.

He couldn't believe it. The girl was actually getting off on stage just by looking at him. Rolling back over onto her stomach, Xtacy took both of her legs and placed them into a Chinese split. Now sitting up, she humped the floor while her booty bounced in the air, all the while still staring at Mills. Then, out of nowhere she stopped, flashed a wicked grin, and got up.

The song was over and Mills didn't even know it. He never wanted the moment to end. Xtacy didn't even pay him any mind as she collected the twenty, fifty, and one-hundred-dollar bills from off the stage and left. To her it was nothing but a job and her shift was over.

Mills, on the other hand, wasn't through yet. He had fallen right into her trap. Something inside of him had to have her right then and there so he got up from the table and headed toward the back. Just as he was entering the back, Xtacy was exiting the stage and heading for the dressing room. Clearing his throat, he stepped to her.

“Yo can I holla at you for a second?”

“How did you get back here? Shank, come get this nigga!” Xtacy yelled, irritated with his presence.

“Ay, calm down shorty I ain't out to harm you. I'm just tryin' to talk to you, see what's up.”

“Look, get yo' ass away from me! I don't know you like that!
Shank
!”

“It's cool Xtacy. This is Mills. He's a friend of Ted,” the guard Shank assured.

“Oh.” Xtacy calmed down and looked Mills up and down.

She liked what she saw. He was tall with braids and smoldering brown eyes, but his looks didn't faze her one bit. What was in his pocket was her main concern. Giving him one last look she flung her hair over her shoulder and walked away.
No, this bitch ain't tryin' to play me
, Mills thought, but that thought went out the window once he caught a glimpse of her ass again. Xtacy had a big ol' voluptuous ass. Looking at her butt jiggle as she walked made Mills's dick even harder.

“Slow down mommy. I know you ain't gon' do me like that!” he yelled as he ran to catch up with her.

The girl could walk fast in some heels.

“Look!” Xtacy quickly turned around, stopping him dead in his tracks. “What happened on stage was just an act. Don't take it seriously, homeboy.”

“Trust me, I know how to put on an act too, but what you did up on that stage wasn't no act. Yo' ass was for real,” Mills countered.

“You think so?” Jade said, smirking.

“I know so.”