Missing Your Smile (43 page)

“And here we are,” he said, bringing the boat into the marina and up to the dock. He cut the engine, jumped out, and tied the boat up. He turned and helped Susan climb out. They walked up to the office to return the boat and then made their way to Robby's car.

“I want to thank you again,” she said. “I'll remember this evening for a long time.”

“You're welcome,” he said as they drove out of the parking lot. “I'll remember it too.”

Robby drove to his mother's house and parked in the driveway. When they got out and went inside, they found Laura sitting in the living room.

“Did you two have a good time?” she asked.

“Excellent!” Robby said.

“Is Teresa asleep?” Susan asked.

“She's in the bedroom,” Laura told her. “I think she's still awake, but I'm not sure.”

“Okay,” Susan said. “And how has the baby been?”

“He's been quiet for an hour now.”

“I think I'll take a peek,” Susan said. “Then I'd better write my parents about our plans. I can call my sister Edna's place once we're on the way and know when we'll arrive.”

“Speaking of writing, you have a letter on the kitchen table. From the looks of it, it might be the results of your GED test.”

“Oh! I'm not sure I want to open it. What if I didn't pass? That would spoil this wonderful evening I've had with Robby.”

“Oh, go ahead! You know you want to open it!” Robby encouraged.

Susan took small steps toward the kitchen table and reached for the letter. She opened it, read a few lines, and then handed it to Laura.

Glancing over the paper, Laura smiled. “You passed! And with a really good grade.”

“Yes!” Susan shrieked. “I passed!” She grabbed Robby and gave him a hug. “I passed! I can't believe it.”

“Well, you deserved to pass. You studied hard, Susan. Congratulations!” Laura said.

“Yes, way to go!” Robby said.

After a brief pause, Susan said, “It's been a wonderful but long day. I think I'll turn in after I check on Teresa and Samuel. Goodnight!”

“Goodnight, dear!” Laura said.

“Happy dreams of home!” Robby said.

Susan slipped into the living room and stood for a moment in front of the lighted Christmas tree. It was so beautiful and so not Amish. She would always cherish this memory of an
Englisha
Christmas with Laura and her family.

Susan moved up the stairs clutching her test results. She knocked quietly then opened the door to the bedroom. Teresa was asleep. Susan tiptoed up to the crib. Samuel was also fast asleep, lying on his back, his arms spread wide.

“Goodnight, Samuel!” she whispered. “Sweet dreams little boy.”

Later, back in her apartment, she pulled out paper and pen to write a letter home.

Dear
Mamm
and
Daett,

Christian greetings
.

We are all doing well here in Asbury Park and will soon be heading home after Christmas. Thanks so much for your invitation to Teresa. She accepted the offer even before her son arrived, and now baby Samuel is with us. The doctor thinks baby and mother can travel before long
.

I plan to buy tickets for all of us soon. I expect it will be by train for most of the way and then by Greyhound. That's how I came to Asbury, and I see no reason to change. Our travel time will be after Christmas, so I hope we can still find tickets even with all the holiday travelers
.

Just to warn you, Teresa has gotten it into her head that she wants to become Amish. I told her that would be okay, and that you would approve because you mentioned that in your letter. I hope to see you soon. I will let Edna know by phone once I have our exact arrival time
.

My best to you. I love you
.

T
homas drove his buggy south from his parents' place, taking his time.
Surely Susan will come home over Christmas
, he thought. “When is Susan coming back?” several of his aunts had asked again yesterday during dinner at his grandparents' place. He'd just shaken his head. There was no sense in letting them know he didn't know. They knew he had broken up with Susan, but thankfully not about the reason why or the Sunday evening he'd spent with Eunice. That still appeared to be a secret. Likely the aunts expected his quarrel with Susan to be on the mend. Well, it wasn't. And since he wouldn't see Eunice again, it was time for a talk with Susan.

Even if Susan were home already, he wondered if she'd speak with him. He could wait until Sunday, and see if she paid him any attention at the hymn singing, but that had its own risk. How could one be certain about such matters? And how much time might be wasted trying to figure things out in advance?

A troubling thought raced through his mind. Had Eunice been right about Susan? Had she been living wild while spending her time in the
Englisha
world? Surely she had not. Susan wasn't like that.

He slapped the reins and pushed the fear away. The time had come to be a man and face things. He would apologize and see if amends could be made. He could have asked his
mamm
to obtain Susan's address from her
mamm
so he could write but that wasn't the right way to approach this. Besides, he wasn't a letter writer. He needed to speak to Susan in person.

Up ahead he saw the Hostetler farm surrounded by open fields. He was south of the buildings. He'd brought Susan to this vantage point so many times on Sunday afternoons and evenings. He paused. Susan's bedroom was on the second floor, on the other side of the house. She wouldn't be able to see him approach…if she was even home. The kitchen windows were on this side of the house, so anyone there would see him coming. He moved on. He would have to suffer the indignity of being rejected if that was what awaited him. Susan was worth the effort. He'd been a fool to let her slip away.

Thomas turned into the driveway. He tied Freddy to the hitching post by the barn. He pulled out the buggy blanket and draped it over the horse's back to protect him against the morning chill. He looked around on the short walk to the front door. Menno kept the farm up well for his age, but that would end soon enough. The man was getting old. Thomas reminded himself that instead of having these troubles with Susan, he should have been spending these past weeks making wedding plans and even building Menno and Anna's
dawdy haus
. He noticed there were still the same cracks in the concrete walkway. The green strings of grass that had managed to poke through in summer were now gone. Broken brown stems lay sideways, the roots still clinging to the sparse soil. Stepping over them, he knocked on the front door.

It was opened almost at once by Anna, her white apron tied to her waist.

“Yes, Thomas?” she asked with a smile.

He cleared his throat. “Would Susan be home yet?”

Anna shook her head. “No, she's not home yet.”

He let disappointment show. “Won't she be home over Christmas this year?”

“We don't know,” Anna said. “I hope to receive a letter from Susan any day now.”

“Is there some way I can reach her?” he asked.
I might as well do what can be done
, he figured.

Anna shrugged. “You could write, I suppose. I can give you her address.”

Thomas ran the tip of his shoe over the steps, chasing two broken leaves around in circles.

“I'm not much of a letter writer,” he admitted.

“I can let Susan know you stopped by when I write to her next,” Anna said.

“I really need to speak with her,” he persisted. “Does she ever call? Or can I call her from the phone shack?”

Anna's eyes brightened at Thomas's interest. “
Nee
, she has only called Edna once. She writes occasionally, Thomas. It's been awhile since you've talked of Susan. We thought perhaps the relationship was over. But I'm glad to see you're still interested.”

“I know I haven't done the best by her lately,” he said. “And I'm sorry.”

“We all make mistakes,” Anna said. “Menno and I would love it if you had a chance to speak with her, but I don't know how it can be done unless you wish to visit her.”

He thought for a moment. “Maybe that would be an idea. Can I have her address just in case? I'm not saying I'll go, but I'll consider it.”

“Certainly,” Anna said. “If you'll step inside, I'll get the address for you.”

Thomas followed her inside and closed the door. He stood quietly while Anna went into the living room. Moments later she returned with a piece of paper.

“Here's the address.”

“I see,” Thomas said, taking the paper and glancing at it. “Thanks. I'll see what I can do.”

“Thank you for stopping by,” Anna said. “I hope things work out.”

Thomas turned to leave, and Anna stood at the door for a moment. When he glanced back after pulling the blanket off Freddy, Anna was gone. Climbing in the buggy, he slapped the reins and drove out.

Is this idea wise?
he wondered.
Do I have time to drive all the way into Salem for details on bus fares?
Yah
, I do
, he decided.
Susan is worth the effort
. He turned his horse north toward Salem, pushing Freddy hard.

I will go to see Susan in Asbury Park. The trip will be worth every minute
.

Susan should be deeply impressed with his devotion. If he waited until she returned—whenever that might be—the effect wouldn't be the same. She would likely greet him the same as before, with closed doors and snubbed visits.

Thomas drove through the edge of town and parked at the gas station with a little Greyhound sign hanging in the window. With a firm step he approached the lady at the front desk.

“I'd like to inquire on the bus schedule to Asbury Park, New Jersey,” he said.

“Asbury Park, New Jersey,” the lady repeated. “Let's see. I can put you on a bus early tomorrow morning that would get you into Asbury Park two days later. How will that work?”

He thought for a moment. “How soon can I leave after Christmas?”

She ran her fingers over the schedule page before answering. “The day after, if you want. So will it be a ticket to and from Asbury Park?”

“Yes,” he said, pulling out his billfold. “And I can board the bus in Livonia? Our people do that all the time.”

She nodded and printed the ticket.

The slow whine of the Greyhound engine rang in his ears, monotonous and irritating. Thomas slouched lower in his seat, the early morning sun glaring through the window. More sleep was out of the question, which didn't matter anyway. Asbury Park was the next stop.

What a name for a town
, he thought.
Is there even a park?
He sighed as he looked out the window. Businesses were visible here and there with residential homes in between.
What a dreary place to live, brightened up
, he supposed,
by the many Christmas lights flickering through the windows of the houses
. Off in the distance a faint sheen of water glimmered.
At least the ocean is close by. That might be interesting
.