Mail Order Bride - Westward Secrets: A Clean Cowboy Romance Novel (Montana Mail Order Brides Book 13) (15 page)

              “Nope.  Still jealous.”

              Gina pretended to think.  “The ferret trainer?”

              “Oh, don’t even talk to the deputy about the ferret trainer.  He hates him most of all.”

              “What about the man who’s very nice to my children?  He can’t hate him,” Gina said.

              Rick laughed.  “You got me there.  No, he doesn’t hate him.  That might be the only one it would be ok for you to marry.”

              “Well, I like all of those alter-egos, but right now, I’m more interested in the dancer alter-ego,” Gina said as the song changed.

              “Oh, ok.  You’re in luck.  He happens to be at home at the moment and he would love to dance,” Rick said as he got up and took her hand.

              Other dancers made space for them as they took the floor. 

              “Ok, now you show me what to do,” Rick said.

              Gina’s eyes got big.  “What?”

              “Show me what to do,” Rick said.

              “You don’t know how to dance?” Gina asked.

              Rick laughed.  “No.  I never had a chance to learn Western dancing since I was traveling all over creation and dancing wasn’t included in my mountie training.  Then, when I was actually working as a mountie, dancing with wildlife and criminals wasn’t encouraged.”

              “But, you’ve been here for a while.  You never danced with anyone before?” Gina asked.

              “Nope.  So teach me,” Rick said.

              “But the other night, you were going to dance with me.”

              “And I would have had you teach me then, but we were interrupted.”

“Aren’t you worried about being embarrassed when you make mistakes?” Gina said.

              “Oh, you’re afraid I’ll be self-conscious.  Well, don’t worry; I won’t.”  He shook her arms a little.  “I thought you wanted to dance?”

              “I do,” she said.  “I thought you had a dancer alter-ego?”

              Rick grinned.  “I didn’t say he was a
good
dancer.  I forgot to tell you that he would need some instruction.”

              “Are you having fun with me?” Gina asked with a laugh.

              “Yes, but I’d have even more fun if you were showing me how to dance,” Rick said with an irritated look.

              “No, I mean are you kidding around with me?” Gina said looking into his eyes.

              “No.  I really can’t dance.  Well, I’m sure I
can
, I just don’t know
how
.  I’m agile, I just lack knowledge,” Rick said.

              “I’ve never taught anyone before,” Gina said.

              Rick shrugged.  “I’ve never danced before, so we’ll try out something new together.”

              Gina took a deep breath and began showing him the correct way to hold her and a few simple steps.  She taught him how to listen for the beat and to count it if need be.  Rick was a quick study and was soon able to dance fairly well after a couple of songs. 

He didn’t get angry when he made mistakes and Gina found that he really didn’t care who watched or laughed.  Joe had to stop singing during one song because he started laughing when Rick tripped.  Instead of being embarrassed, Rick laughed, too, and then went back to learning.  Gina laughed more than she had in months and discovered the clown side of Rick.

He walked her over to the edge of the dance floor and told her to wait there.  Then he crossed it again and approached the stage.  He tapped on Seth’s boot to get him to stop playing.  Seth crouched down and Rick said something in his ear.  Seth gave him a doubtful look and Rick grinned and nodded.  Seth shook his head and Rick said something else to him.  Gina wondered what in the world was going on.  Seth rolled his eyes and a resigned expression settled on his features.

Seth set his fiddle on the floor well away from Luke and jumped off the stage.  He made a signal to Joe and Luke.  Joe tapped Ben on the shoulder and said something to him.  Then he spoke into Jamie’s ear.  Gina watched it all in bewilderment.  The song they were playing wrapped up and a waltz began.  The couples began swaying to and fro and Gina couldn’t believe what she was seeing when Seth started instructing Rick on how to waltz.

Laughter rippled through the saloon as Seth showed him the proper stance for each of them and where to place his hands.  At first Seth was self-conscious about doing it, but then he got involved in what they were doing and forgot about their audience.  At one point, the piano stopped playing as Ben ran across the stage to the other piano so he could play and watch what was happening.

In those days, it wasn’t uncommon for the men to dance with each other if there were no women around, but that hadn’t been the case in Dawson for a number of years.  So Seth and Rick’s dancing lesson was a very entertaining novelty.  Once Seth was satisfied, he actually began moving them around the floor. 

J.R. and Maddie watched and laughed as hard as anyone else.  Maddie remembered when her father had taught Seth to waltz as a form of physical therapy for Seth’s badly injured leg.  That was when she and Seth had fallen in love.  Amid the laughter, Maddie also had tears in her eyes as she thought about what a wonderful memory it was.  It had been so funny to watch Geoff and Seth whirling around the floor together.  Now here were her husband and her brother doing the same thing. 

My brother.  I have a brother, who, despite my angry, spiteful words, came to my rescue and is now dancing with my husband.
  The shame that Maddie felt earlier came back and she realized how petty she had been towards Rick.  Maddie hadn’t thought that part of her still existed.  She was dismayed to find out that it did, and yet she couldn’t help herself.  Again, Maddie put those thoughts away and watched her husband.

When the dance was over, Seth and Rick bowed to one another and the audience clapped and cheered.  Then they shook hands and Seth got back up on stage.  Gina was breathless with laughter as Rick came back to her and took her in his arms as another waltz started.

“I can’t believe you did that!” she said.

Rick said, “Reckless said he was a great teacher when it came to waltzing, so I figured he was the man for the job.  Not only that, but I just wanted to see if I could get Seth to do it.  I told him he owed me for helping Maddie.  That did the trick.”

Gina enjoyed the way he held her and said, “I think he is a very good teacher.  You’re doing very well, Mr. Dancer alter-ego.”

“Shh!  The deputy will hear you,” Rick said.  “Not to mention the bouncer and you already know he’s a real hot-head.”

Gina giggled as he spun her and almost stepped on her foot.  Gina did a little hop to avoid his boot and he mimicked it.

“You’re not supposed to do that during a waltz,” she said.

“Oh.  Sorry.  I thought it was some variation of the dance,” Rick said.

Gina saw he was serious and that made it twice as funny to her.  It was the best waltz she ever had because he made it funny without even trying.  Seth watched him and his shoulders shook with laughter, which made his playing a little off key from time to time.

Rick bowed to Gina when the dance ended and she curtsied.  Then he led her over to their table and they sat down. 

“You’re too much,” Gina said as she caught her breath and smiled.

Rick said, “I’ve been told that before.  Thank you for teaching me how to dance.  I’m not sure that I’ll ever be very good at it, but I’ll do it just to be able to hold you.”

“You are so sweet,” she said putting a hand on his forearm.

His hand settled on top of hers.  “I mean it.  You know, there’s one alter-ego you haven’t met yet.”

“Which one would that be?” Gina asked.

“The passionate lover,” Rick said.

Gina smiled.  “I’ve briefly met him a time or two.”

“Well, if you would like a longer visit with him, you just let me know,” Rick said. 

Blushing, Gina said, “I don’t know what to say when you say things like that.”

“Sorry.  I’ll try to refrain from saying them, but no promises,” Rick said, and changed the subject to other things.

They drove down the lane to the Dwyers’ and Rick pulled the horse to a stop.  Turning to Gina, he asked, “Did you have a good time?”

“You know I did,” she said.

Rick smiled.  “Me, too.  Oh, wait.  Passionate Lover would like to tell you something.”

Gina giggled.  “All right.  He may go ahead.”

Leaning over, Rick brushed his mouth over hers and Gina shivered a little.  The air in the carriage became charged with their shared desire.  Gina slid her fingers through his hair and pulled his mouth harder against hers.  He smelled of beer and sweat and she liked the way he tasted.  She couldn’t get close enough to him.

Sensing her dilemma, Rick wrapped his arms around her and pulled her across the seat to him.  Her soft lips were pliant under his and he gladly deepened the kiss when she urged him to.  Rick wanted to take her right there in the carriage, but he also wanted to treat her right and giving in to his passion in the vehicle right outside the house wasn’t the way to do it.

Gina felt him begin to draw back and did the same.  She smiled and said, “I enjoyed my little talk with Passionate Lover.”

“Well, he enjoyed it, too.  I’ll walk you to the door,” Rick said as he got out of the carriage.

“Thank you,” Gina said as he opened her door.

At the door, Rick said, “Pleasant dreams, Lovely.”

“To you, too,” she said.

As before, Rick waited until he heard the door being locked before leaving.

Gina couldn’t sleep that night.  She smiled as she replayed their night out in her mind.  She’d never met a man who had so many different sides to his personality.  Rick didn’t mind that people thought him a little strange.  In fact, he seemed to like keeping people off balance and being mysterious.  Gina thought about Rick’s past and understood why he would feel the need to be secretive.

Her smile faded as she thought about how he’d suffered at the hands of an unstable woman who had no business being a mother.  Gina was certainly happy that Rick was there, but it would have been better for him in a lot of ways if he’d never been born to that woman.  Anger at Rick’s dead mother surged through her.  As a mother herself, Gina couldn’t imagine doing such heinous things to her children.

Though Rick was strong and perfectly capable of dealing with danger, Gina knew the damage that had been inflicted inside of him that was the biggest danger Rick would ever have to face.  She knew that he hadn’t told her everything his mother had done to him and wasn’t sure he ever would.  That would have to be his decision, but if he ever did want to talk about it, she would listen and try to comfort him. 

Rolling over, Gina thought about the passion Rick brought out in her.  That part of her had been dormant for over two years and, even though she’d been planning on marrying Steve, she’d been nervous about the physical aspects of marriage.  She wasn’t some innocent who didn’t know what to expect.  No, Gina had experienced desire and pleasure with Tony, but after he’d died, she hadn’t thought she would feel that level of passion again.

However, just in the brief encounters she’d had with Rick, Gina knew that it would be like that with him.  Maybe even more so.  Rick had wondered how Gina felt about something like that happening before marriage and she still honestly didn’t know.  In the eyes of society, it was forbidden, but it still happened. 

Gina knew she shouldn’t be thinking such thoughts, but she was helpless to prevent them from entering her mind.  It was much too soon, but it felt like she’d known Rick a long time, even though they’d just met.  Though she tried to deny it, Gina knew that a strong connection had been made.  The sensible side of her kept saying to slow down and proceed cautiously while the irrational side said to throw that caution aside and lead with her heart.

She might have done just that were it not for her two precious little ones down the hall.  They were her first responsibility and she had to see to their welfare before hers.  Rushing into a serious relationship would not be a good idea.  What she’d told Chloe about Steve had been true.  Even had Steve not passed away, Gina wouldn’t have married him until they knew each other better.  Shouldn’t she follow that same plan with Rick?  He’d playfully referred to marriage tonight, but it was just that—a game.

Letting a man into her children’s lives permanently was a serious decision and Gina wasn’t prepared to let them get very attached to anyone if it wouldn’t work out.  Rick was wonderful with the children and they liked him very much, but her children would be hurt if something happened and they wouldn’t be able to see him anymore.

No, even though she wanted to give in to her growing feelings for Rick, Gina decided that beginning a physical relationship with him would be a bad idea.  Her decision made, she was finally able to sleep.

              Rick was on the later shift again the next day, so he decided to ride out to Joe’s and see Gina for just a little bit. 

When Randall announced him, Lacey said, “C’mon and have some coffee, Rick.”

              They were still having breakfast and the Dwyers were always very hospitable in offering food and refreshment to guests.

Rick took off his hat and coat and hung them on the back of the chair beside Gina.  “Thanks, Lacey.  I have a little time and coffee sounds good.  Hi, Lovely,” he said to Gina with a grin.

              She smiled back, but Rick saw wariness in her eyes.  “Hello, deputy,” she said.

              “No, no.  Right now, it’s just Rick,” he said.  Even more than he read in her expression, Rick felt that something in Gina had changed towards him and it was worrisome.  He couldn’t fathom what had caused it.

              “Oh, pardon me,” she said.

              “But deputy says hello, too,” Rick said.

              Joe and Lacy exchanged perplexed glances.

              Chloe asked, “Are you pretending to be someone else?  Like in a play?”

              Rick leaned over towards her and said, “Sort of.  Do you like plays?”

              “Yeah.  I was in a Christmas play last year,” she said.

              “Oh?  And who did you play?” Rick asked.

              “I was an angel,” she said.

              “Why am I not surprised?  You’re certainly pretty enough to be an angel,” Rick responded.

              Chloe giggled.

              Emily said, “When’s Owl comin’ to see us again?  Chloe wants to see him again.”

              “Shut up, Emily,” Chloe said and turned pink.

              Gina admonished her daughter.  “Chloe!  That’s very rude.  Don’t say that to Emily.  I’m sorry about that,” she said as she looked at Joe and Lacey.

              Lacey said, “It’s ok.  Emily ought to know when to keep her mouth shut, but she takes so much after Joe—”  She squealed when Joe tickled the back of her neck.

              Joe laughed and kept doing it until she started squirming out of her chair.  “This is what’s called ‘gentle shaming’ by the Lakota.  It’s how they correct bad behavior.”

              “Joe!” Lacey said as she stood up and twisted out of his range.

              He chuckled at her.  “What’s the matter, darlin’?”

              She came back towards her chair, but backed away again when Joe turned towards her.  “Joe, don’t you dare.  That’s enough now.”

              “All right, all right.  I’ll stop now,” Joe said and kept his hands to himself. 

              “That was a very amusing spectacle you put on last night,” Lacey said to Rick.

              He smiled.  “I’m glad you enjoyed it.  I know I did.  Especially dancing with Lovely, here.”  Rick patted Gina’s hand briefly.  “I have to go be deputy now.”

              Gina chuckled.  “Well, don’t let me interfere.”

              Lacey said, “Ok, girls, time to go to school.  Meet me out at the barn.”

              Chloe hugged and kissed her mother and then Rick, who smiled and said, “Have a good day, Miss Chloe.  Did you meet a handsome boy yet?”

              She just blushed and ran after Emily who was already outside.  Ryan ran after her.  He liked to ride along to the school.

              Rick said, “That means yes.”

              Gina looked at him.  “Do you think so?”

              “Mmm hmm.  Not answering is sometimes a form of answering in the affirmative without wanting to voice said affirmative,” he said.

              Joe said, “They grow up too fast.  Six short years from now, Emily will have boys wantin’ to court her.”

              Gina teased, “But you already know who she’s marrying.”

              “Shut up, Gina,” Joe said with a grin.

              Gina threw a little piece of toast at him, which bounced off his Western shirt and landed in his coffee.

              Rick said, “No wonder the kids do this stuff.  Is it like that around here all the time?”

              Joe said, “Pretty much.  That was a good shot, Gina.  Bet you can’t do it again.”

              Gina giggled.  “I’m not betting away my hard earned money.”

              “Fine,” Joe said, with a disappointed sigh.  “I guess I’ll have to find someone else to make a bet with.”

              “That’s right,” Gina said.  “Well, I have to get to work, now.”

              Rick said, “All right.  I’ll see you later.  I’m going to finish my coffee and get going.”

              With a smile, Gina said, “Have a good day, deputy.”

              “I’ll do that,” Rick said.

              He frowned as he watched her walk away.  As he visited with Joe and Lacey, Rick became determined to find out what was bothering Gina.

              Gina was working on one of Randall’s uniform jackets when Rick came into the sewing room and shut the door.  He locked it behind him and smiled at her.

              “Hi, Lovely.  Looks like you have a lot of work to do, so I’ll make this quick,” he said as his gaze took in the pile of clothes off to one side that apparently needed attention.

              Gina said, “All right.”  Her heart sang with joy at the sight of him, but her mind held it in check.

              Rick pulled a chair over close to her and sat in it.  She gasped as he swiftly turned her chair around to directly face him and leaned towards her.  “Is there some reason you’re keeping me at arm’s length today?” he asked, looking directly into her eyes.

              Gina swallowed and her heart beat accelerated.  This wasn’t because she was afraid of him, but because he looked and smelled so good.  “I am?”

              “Yes, you are.  Did I do something wrong?” he asked as his gaze settled briefly on her mouth.  “Because it certainly didn’t feel as if I did anything wrong last night.  Am I being the wrong ego today?” he teased.

              Gina laughed.  She couldn’t help it.  “No.  I’m fine, really.”

              “I didn’t ask you if you were fine, I asked why you’re acting distant with me,” Rick pressed.  “I prefer people’s answers to match the questions I ask them.”

              Gina’s brows drew down.  “I’m not some suspect that needs interrogating.”

              Rick laughed.  “No, you’re not.  But you are the same woman I had dinner with and danced with last night, right?”

              “Yes.”

              “And I am not talking to an alter-ego, correct?”

              Gina laughed.  “No.”

              “All right, then what changed since last night when you enjoyed your brief talk with Passionate Lover?”

              He was troubled by the strange expression that crossed her beautiful face and that she could no longer meet his eyes.  “What did I say wrong?” he asked in a softer tone.

              Gina became flustered as she tried to think of a way to tell him what she was feeling.  “I don’t know what to think about you.  I mean, it’s all too fast.  I wasn’t expecting you.  I arrived here to find that the man I thought I was going to marry was dead and that I had nowhere to go. 

“So many people have helped me and I’m grateful.  I’m especially grateful to you because you were the one who suggested us staying with Joe and Lacey in the first place.  You’re wonderful with the kids, and you’re kind to me, and funny, and handsome, and nothing about you is conventional.  And yes, I enjoy kissing you and such, but—”

“—Gina, say no more,” Rick said as he leaned back.  “I never meant to pressure you.  I realize that things haven’t been … normal between us since we met.  I also know that you’re still adjusting to a whole new life and that you have two children whom you love and whom need you.  Just as grateful as you may feel towards me, I feel infinitely more grateful to you.  So I think we’re even there.”

Gina smiled a little.  “You’re right.  Things haven’t been normal.  I mean, you took me by surprise.”

“How so?” Rick asked.

“A day after we met, you informed me that you were going to kiss me someday,” Gina answered.

He chuckled.  “I wasn’t wrong, was I?”

“No.”

“Right.  And who instigated that kiss?” he asked.

“Me.”

“Right again,” Rick said.  “Gina, I think last night was a good start towards a normal … whatever you want to call it.  If you’re not comfortable calling it a courtship, that’s fine with me.  The point is, maybe it can start to be normal between us, or at least what’s normal for me.  I’m not even sure I know what that is.  I’m starting to sound like Joe because he carries on conversations with himself all the time.”

Gina couldn’t control her laughter.  “It’s true.  I’ve heard him do it,” she said.

Rick laughed with her.  “Ok.  How about this; you let me know what you’re comfortable with and we’ll go from there.  Does that sound acceptable?”

“Yes.  Thank you,” Gina said as she met his eyes once again.

“Does this mean I’m not going to see Racy Lady for a while?” Rick asked.

“Maybe.  Or you might see her from time to time.”

“Good.  I’ll look forward to it.  Well, Deputy has to go to work again,” Rick said and kissed her cheek.  “Have a good day, Lovely.”

“You, too.”

Rick left her then and Gina missed him almost immediately.  She wanted to shout to him to come back and kiss her properly, but she couldn’t do that.  What she could do was go back to work and try not to think about Rick for a while.