Mail Order Bride - Westward Secrets: A Clean Cowboy Romance Novel (Montana Mail Order Brides Book 13) (17 page)

“No!”

“I can help you out with one decision.  Do you want me to?” Rick asked as his brown eyes zeroed in on hers.

“Yes!”

“Ok.” 

He moved so quickly that Gina wasn’t sure what was happening at first.  Gina found herself pinned up against the door with Rick’s mouth pressed to hers in a kiss that heated her body all the way to her toes.  His hat fell off when she buried her hands in his long hair.  Gina couldn’t resist the intense physical reaction she had to him. 

Everything about Rick excited her.  His scent, hard muscles, sensual lips, and the way he held her, all incited her desire.  Maybe it was because she had been lonely since Tony’s passing or missed the touch of a man, but Gina doubted it.  If that was all she’d been after, she could have found someone in Martins Ferry who would have been willing to have an affair with her.  However, no one had ever piqued her interest. 

Eddie, Joe’s head groom, was a handsome, eligible bachelor, and yet she felt nothing for him other than friendship.  There were a few other men that Gina had come into contact with in town that had shown interest in her, but she didn’t return that interest.  No, there was something about Rick himself that spoke to her, but if anyone had asked, she wouldn’t have been able to tell them exactly what it was.

Just as suddenly as it had started, the embrace ended when Rick pulled back and broke their contact.  Their breathing came in the form of pants.  Rick took Gina’s hand and pressed it to his chest, over his heart.  She could feel the strong, rapid beat under her palm.

“Do you feel what you do to me?” he asked in a slightly hoarse voice.

Gina nodded and, though the room was dim, Rick saw the movement.

“Is that what your heart is doing right now?”

Again she nodded. 

“It’s as simple as that, Gina.  I’ll admit you have more at stake than I do, but in any relationship there’s a certain amount of risk.  Involving kids is another matter and I’m not so selfish that I would tell you to satisfy yourself without giving them any thought.  What I will tell you is that I know from personal experience how vulnerable children are and I would never, ever, put any child at risk of being hurt, either physically or emotionally,” Rick said as his breathing began to return to normal.  “Now that you’ve heard my position on the matter, maybe it will help you make a decision about me.  See you for dinner tomorrow night?”

“Y-yes,” she said as she looked into his eyes.  “I’ll see you then.”

Rick collected his hat, put it on, and held open the storeroom door for her.  Gina made sure no one was around before exiting the room; Rick followed at a casual pace.

“See ya, Lovely,” he said with a last look at her flushed face.

Gina stood in the large doorway of the barn and looked after him as he walked over to his horse and mounted.

“What just happened?” she asked aloud.

              Gina worked on pinning the hem on a dress for Lacey.  Lacey stood with it on so that Gina could measure the correct length it needed to be.  The first lady of Dawson could see that Gina was preoccupied and thought it must have something to do with Rick.

              Curiosity and concern made her ask, “Is everything ok between you and Rick?”

              Gina sighed and stopped her work a moment.  “I don’t know what to do about him and he isn’t any help.”

              Lacey chuckled.  “Men aren’t sometimes.  What do you mean, exactly?”

              “I don’t want the children to be hurt if it doesn’t work out.  I don’t want to be hurt, either,” Gina said.

              “I can understand that.  How do you feel about him?  Do you love him?” Lacey asked.

              “Love him?  It’s a little soon for that, don’t you think?” Gina said.

              “Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn’t,” Lacey said.  “I think I fell in love with Joe the day we married.  We’d only known each other about four days when we had the wedding.”

              “Four days?  That’s it?” Gina asked as she went about her task once more.

              “Yeah, but it was different for me.  I was trying to escape an abusive father and Joe needed to get married to get his inheritance.  It was supposed to be a business arrangement, but it quickly turned into love.  Love doesn’t always have to take months to develop.  Sometimes you just know,” Lacey said.

              “I’ve been in love before.  I loved Tony so much and I think there’s a part of me that’s afraid to let go of him completely.  I feel as if I’ll be dishonoring his memory somehow if I move on with another man,” Gina said.

              “Jamie felt much the same way after her husband passed away, but then she started writing Luke and was smitten as soon as they met.  It happens.  You weren’t expecting to meet someone like Rick.  But, as Jamie put it; you’re still alive and so you have to go on with your life.  Yes, the children are your first priority, but maybe you being courted by Rick will be good for all of you.  It’s easy to see how much he cares for Chloe and Ryan.  I also see the way you look at each other,” Lacey said.  She gave Gina a knowing smile.

              Gina groaned.  “I can’t help it.  He comes around and he’s all I can see.  He makes me feel things that I haven’t felt in a long while and, though it makes me happy, it also scares me.  I guess I’m afraid to take that leap.”

              “Rick is a good man.  A little odd, but a good man.  You could certainly do worse.  He’s a good friend, fun, good with kids, funny, and very handsome,” Lacey said.

              “Yes.  He’s all of those things and more.  Did you know that he’s Canadian?  He used to be a mountie,” Gina said.

              “Joe mentioned that to me.  There’s a lot about the man that no one knows,” Lacey said.

              Gina would never reveal all that she knew about Rick.  “Yes.  Maybe one day, he’ll feel comfortable enough to start letting people in more.”

              “Maybe, but I’m sure he would let
you
in,” Lacey said.

             
He already has and I’m so happy that he felt that he could trust me.

              Gina just smiled and went back to working on the dress again.  As she pinned the hem, she gave careful consideration to what she was going to do about the deputy.

              Rick showed up to collect Gina on time.  He brought her a bouquet of autumn flowers that he grew on his property.  Seeing her pretty smile was worth the effort he’d made to put the arrangement together.

              “They’re lovely,” Gina said.  “Thank you so much.”

              “My pleasure.  Where’re the little people?” he asked.  He’d been missing them and wanted to say hello.

              “In the playroom.  They’re drawing,” Gina said.  “I’m going to put these in a vase.”

              “I’ll go see them a few minutes,” Rick said and headed down the hallway. 

              The kids mobbed him when they saw him and Rick spent a good fifteen minutes playing with them.  He drew a picture of Stan, his pot-bellied pig.  It wasn’t the best picture, but it wasn’t the worst. 

              When Gina looked at it, he said, “As you can see, I’m not proficient in drawing, but I gave it my best try.”

              “I think it’s very good,” she said.  “Just like the man who made it.”

              Rick’s smile made Gina’s heart swell and she couldn’t deny her strong feelings for him.  Did she
want
to deny them?  What was the point of that?  Suddenly her mind was made up.  She was going to take it day by day and see what happened.

              Rick stood up and bade the children goodbye, promising to come see them the next day. 

              At dinner in Wolfe Point, Gina started playing a game and Rick quickly picked it up.  They looked around at the other diners and made up what they thought their conversations would be like.  These conversations were mainly inane, and sometimes scandalous.  Rick’s naturally sarcastic nature corresponded nicely with Gina’s ability to come up with harebrained responses and they laughed throughout their meal.

              By the time dessert came, both of their stomachs hurt from so much mirth.  Gina couldn’t remember a time when she’d laughed so much.  Rick had a way of saying things that seemed innocent, but were actually double-edged and could be taken as insults.  Gina loved hearing him say such things.

              Rick enjoyed seeing the happy light in her beautiful, brown eyes and he was glad that he was the cause of it.  He didn’t know if she’d come to a decision about him or not, but he was determined to simply live in the moment and not worry about it.  All he needed to know was that he was with the woman he was coming to care about deeply and that they were having a good time.

              Gina thought she’d never seen a more virile man than Rick.  His long, light brown hair was styled nicely and the black, pinstripe suit he wore was cut to emphasize his broad shoulders.  She’d felt the firm muscles of his chest and arms before and she longed to feel them again. 

As they ate dessert, Gina reached for his free hand and thought about what nice hands he had.  They were strong and dexterous and she could imagine how they would feel on her body.  Try as she might, Gina couldn’t keep these kinds of thoughts at bay. 

Once dinner was over and they were ensconced in the carriage, she scooted over on the seat and leaned against Rick.  He put an arm around her and smiled down at her.

“You’re warm,” she said and drew a blanket around her legs.

“I’ll get us home as soon as possible.  I wasn’t expecting the weather to turn this cold so suddenly,” Rick said.

“It’s fine.  I’m fine where I am,” Gina said.  “I haven’t seen the ferrets in a while.  Would it be all right to have a visit?”

“Certainly.  They’ll be glad to see you.  Once we get a warm day again, I’m going to bathe them.  You and the kids should come watch.  It’s a lot of fun the way I do it,” he said.

“I’ll bet.  They’re so cute,” she said.

Rick chuckled and inhaled her slightly flowery scent.  Her personal scent underlay the perfume and the combination was very pleasing to him.  “It surprises me that you like them.  Many women don’t.  They react to them the way Joe does Curtis.”

“Poor Joe,” Gina said with a giggle.  “I shouldn’t laugh, but it is funny.  Do you know the reason he’s afraid of Curtis?”

“No.”
              “He said he was attacked by a couple of rats when he was young and so he’s scared of anything that looks at all like a rat,” she said.

“Ah, I see.  That makes sense now.  I’ll try to stop teasing him, but no promises,” Rick said. 

              Gina chuckled and snuggled closer to him.  As they drove, she became sleepy due to Rick’s body heat and the wine she’d consumed.  Lulled by the motion of the carriage, she soon slumbered.

              Rick said something to her but she didn’t respond.  Looking down, he saw that she slept and smiled.  He admired the way her eyelashes lay on her cheeks like dark fans and he looked at her pink mouth.   He already knew it was soft and sweet. 

Hunger for her welled up inside him and Rick admitted to himself that he wanted her in a way that he’d wanted no other woman.  However, he’d meant what he’d said to her; he wouldn’t try to influence any decision she might make about the physical aspects of their relationship.  He respected Gina too much to do that.

Rick purposely turned his thoughts away from that area so that he could concentrate on the road ahead.  He frowned as he wondered if his family had chosen to ignore him.  Outside of Jack, he hadn’t had any contact with them.  Of course, his schedule had been full with work and trying to see Gina in between, so someone might have come looking for him and he wouldn’t have known.  Something inside told him that no one had, however. 

Even though he tried not to let it, Rick was bothered by it.  He thought that after the night at the Watering Hole when he’d saved Maddie from the drunken cowboy, she might have come to see him, but she hadn’t. 
I’m not going to let them ignore me.  I’m at least going to have my say and then let the chips fall where they may.  At least I’ll have gotten some things off my chest.

They arrived at his little house and Rick gently shook Gina.  She woke and straightened, looking around her in a disoriented manner.

“Where are we?” she asked and yawned.

“My house,” Rick said.

“I fell asleep.  I’m so sorry,” Gina said.  “It wasn’t the company.”

“It’s all right.  I’m not upset about it,” Rick said as he got out of the carriage.

Gina stepped down when he opened her door and the wind hit her, making her teeth chatter.  Rick hurried her into his house, where he quickly built a fire.  He pulled two chairs over close to the hearth and wrapped the blanket around her as he had her sit in one of the chairs.

“We’ll get you warm here shortly,” he said as he sat in the other chair.

“I can feel the heat already,” she said.  “I’m so sorry about nodding off like that.”

Rick smiled.  “It was the wine.  Besides, it was nice feeling you all snuggled against me like that.”

Gina looked at him with questions in her eyes. 

“What?” he asked.

“I can’t figure you out,” Gina responded.

“Are you going to tell me again that as a Canadian I should be able to help you with that?”

Gina laughed.  “No.  I can’t believe I said that.”

“It’s ok.  It was very amusing.  What is it about me that you can’t figure out?” Rick asked. 

“How is it that a man who is capable of great violence and who has such a sharp tongue is also capable of such sweetness and compassion?” she said softly.

Rick gave her a self-deprecating smile and said, “I guess it’s because I always had to be a lot of different things growing up.”

Gina’s brows drew down because his statement perplexed her.  “What do you mean?”

Rick said, “The violent part comes from being picked on by older kids when I was young.  I had to learn how to fight.  I also learned how to demean and embarrass them with words as another defense tool.  When it came to my mother, sometimes I was able to cajole her out of one of her moods by being sweet and complimentary towards her. 

“As I got older, I learned more fighting from various sources.  Compassion and kindness were instilled in me by Emery.  Because of what I’d suffered at the hands of my mother, I learned to be empathetic towards others and what they might be going through.  That’s how I ended up with all those different egos.  Depending on what I’m doing, I pull one out and use it.”

“That’s a very odd way of looking at it,” Gina said.

“I guess so.  I keep telling you that I have no idea what normal is.  My life has never been normal.  What is ‘normal’, anyway?  Your normal is most likely different from mine.  Mitch’s normal is different than yours, and so on.  So, while the way I am might be strange to you, it’s what’s normal for me,” Rick said.

Gina laughed.  “That’s very philosophical.”

“Is it?  I guess so, now that I think about it.”  Rick’s mouth curved upwards.  “I didn’t intend it to be.”

Gina was getting warm so she took off the blanket he’d given her.  “It’s getting toasty in here.”

Rick gazed at her hungrily and he knew that if she looked in his eyes, she would see it.

“Gina, did you really want to come here to see the ferrets or did you have something else in mind?” he asked.

She was surprised by his question because she hadn’t realized that he’d seen through her so easily.  It shouldn’t have surprised her though because she knew how insightful Rick could be.  It was one of the things that made him a good deputy and bouncer.  He understood much about human nature and it seemed as though he could read minds sometimes.

“I’m not sure, actually,” Gina said.  Anxiety threaded its way around her mind.

Rick repeated his behavior from when he’d confronted her in the sewing room.  He turned her chair around so they directly faced one another.  “Don’t think.  Just say what you want.”