Mail Order Bride - Westward Secrets: A Clean Cowboy Romance Novel (Montana Mail Order Brides Book 13) (11 page)

Gina smiled at him.  He sounded a little like himself.  “I’ll never forget it,” she said, tongue-in-cheek.

Rick managed to smile at that.  “I’m sure you won’t.”

Ben asked, “Do you feel any better?”

Rick assessed himself.  He wasn’t shaking as badly and he hadn’t had a flashback in a few minutes.  “I think so.  I need to go home,” he said and sat up.  The world tilted and he grabbed his head.  “What the hell did you give me?”

“Cannabis,” Ben said.  “It’s a common sedative.”

“Yes, I can see how it would be good for that.  It’s powerful.”  Rick shook his head a little and took some deep breaths.

“Rick, I know you want to go home, but I don’t know if it’s safe for you to be alone,” Ben said.

“I would stay with you, but I have the children to take care of.  Everyone will worry if I don’t come home,” Gina said.

Rick said, “I know.  Joe will send out a search party for you.  I’ll be fine.  I’m used to dealing with this.”

Gina’s brow furrowed.  “How often does this happen?”

“Two or three times a week,” Rick said.  “But it doesn’t get near this bad.  I usually head it off before then.”

“Are you on medication?” Ben asked.  He was surprised to find out that Rick had an ongoing mental condition.  He always seemed so level-headed and in control.

“Nope.  I just drink some vodka and it does the trick,” he replied.  “It’s the only time I drink.”

Ben frowned.  “You need the proper medication, Rick.”

“I didn’t want to talk about it.  Doctors make you talk about it.  I can’t think about it anymore right now,” Rick said.  “Please don’t make me.”

Ben saw that Rick was on the verge of another episode.  “No, we’re not going to discuss it any longer.”

Rick started getting up but grew dizzy.  “I need to go home!”
              Ben asked, “Why do you need to go home so badly?”

“Because that’s where my pets are and they help me,” Rick said.  “That might sound stupid to some people, but they do.”

Gina rubbed his shoulder and said, “We don’t think it’s stupid.  Animals can help relax you.”

He smiled at her.  “Thanks for understanding.”

Ben said, “If you’re really insistent, I’ll drive you home and then drop Gina at home.”

“Thanks, Ben,” Rick said.

“Just lie back here while I go tell Sasha,” Ben said.

Rick lay down and Ben left.

“So what do you think about all of this?” he asked Gina and feared the worst.  “I know you didn’t expect to find out that I had so many secrets.  I’m sorry our night was ruined again.”

Gina placed a hand on his cheek and said, “Rick, it doesn’t change my opinion of you.  In fact, I admire you for having such fortitude and surviving a horrible childhood.  And for taking up such a noble profession.”

Rick smiled and said, “You’re a special woman, Gina.  Not everyone would look at it like that.”

Ben returned.  “All right.  Let’s get both of you home.”

              Gina was loathe to leave Rick, but he insisted that he would be all right.

              “Lovely, go home to your kids.  I’m just going to bed.  That pill really is strong,” Rick said.  “I have no idea what tomorrow will bring, so I better get my rest.”

              Ben wondered what he was talking about but refrained from asking.  He helped Rick sit down in a chair.  “I’m leaving these cannabis pills with you to take if you need them.  Take one as soon as you feel an attack coming on, ok?”

              Rick nodded.  “Ok.  Thanks, Ben.  I know I harass you, but you’re a good man and a good friend.”

              Ben smiled.  “We wouldn’t have you any other way.  I’ll check on you tomorrow or you come see me at the clinic.  Gina, I’ll be in the carriage.”

              Once they were alone, Gina sat on Rick’s lap and took him in her arms.  “I hate leaving you alone.”
              Rick hugged her back.  “You feel so good.  I wish you could stay, too, but your little people will be worried about their mommy if you’re not there in the morning.”

              “Yes, I know.  I don’t know how to hitch up a carriage and I don’t trust myself to find my way to Joe’s from here yet,” Gina said.

              “It’s ok.  I can’t thank you enough for being so understanding and for all your help,” Rick said.  He drew back and looked at her.  “I meant what I said earlier about you being a special woman.  You really are.”

              She held his face in her hands as she looked into his beautiful eyes.  “You are a special man, Mr. Mountie.”

              Rick laughed.  “Former mountie, you mean.”

              “All right then, deputy.  I know that it’s been a rough night, but I was wondering something?” Gina said.

              “What’s that?” he asked.

              “Well, I’ve never been kissed by a former mountie before,” she said.

              “Yes, you have,” Rick replied.

              Gina gave him a playful smile.  “Yes, but I didn’t
know
you used to be a mountie.”

              “So do you think it’ll be different now that you know?” Rick asked, grinning.

              “I don’t know, but I’d like to find out,” Gina said.

              “Who am I to refuse such a request?” Rick said.  He wanted very badly to kiss her.

              His emotions were still raw and, though he tried to be gentle, he still ended up kissing her very passionately.  Gina didn’t mind at all.  His lips were warm and soft and Gina enjoyed the feel of them against her own.  His hair drew her hands and she threaded her fingers through it.  Rick pressed her harder against him and growled a little at how good her womanly body felt.  She was responsive and passionate and Rick had a hard time pulling away from her, but he did. 

              “Well, that was … wonderful,” he said. 

              “Yes, it was,” Gina said.

              “So how was it kissing a former mountie?” he asked with a smile.

              “Stimulating,” Gina said with a naughty smile.

              Rick laughed.  “Ok, you better get out of here before I tell Ben to get going and leave you behind.”

              Gina reluctantly slid off his lap.  She gave him a kiss on the cheek and said, “Get some rest, Rick.  Whatever happens from now on, you won’t have to face it alone.  Don’t forget that.”

              Rick kissed her hand.  “Thank you.”

              “Goodnight.”

              Watching her leave, Rick suddenly felt bereft and lonely even though she wasn’t even out to the carriage yet.  He leaned his head back in his chair and closed his eyes.  That pill Ben had given him was making him very tired.  Since he didn’t feel like moving, Rick stayed put and dozed off in the chair.

              A knock on his door startled him out of his slumber.  Rick didn’t know how long he’d been asleep.  Something told him not too long. 
Who the heck is that now?
  Rick was stiff as he rose from his chair and his neck hurt for some reason.

              He was startled to see Claire and Marcus on his doorstep.

              “Huh.  It’s musical doctors tonight, I guess,” Rick said with a smile.  “Come in.”

              The couple entered and Claire looked around at the two rooms.  It was small but homey.  It reminded her of the little house by the creek in which she and Marcus had lived when they were first married.  She felt a pang of nostalgia for the place.

              Rick said, “It’s not much, but it’s home.”

              Claire smiled and looked at Rick closely.  Rick noticed her scrutiny of him.  He smiled back and said, “He told you, didn’t he?”

              “Yes.  You and I look a lot alike,” Claire said.  “We have the same hair and eye color.”

              Rick was surprised and looked her over again.  “I guess we do.  I never thought of that.  I don’t really look like your—our father.  I look like my mother.” 
Flash! 
“Damn it!”

              Claire frowned.  “It’s all right if you look like her.”

              “No, it’s not!” Rick said as he looked around for the pills Ben had given him.  They were on the table. He picked them up. 

              Marcus and Claire became very concerned about him.  Claire said, “Rick, is there something wrong?  I mean, I know this is stressful, but I’m not angry with you.”

              “That’s good.” More images.  The tremors began anew and Rick groaned.  He held the bottle out to Marcus.  “Will you open this and give me one?”

              Marcus took the bottle and looked at it.  “Cannabis?  Why are you on this?”  He was surprised.  Cannabis was something Marcus rarely prescribed unless the patient had been experiencing severe stress.

              “It’s a long story.  Ben just gave it to me tonight.  Please, Marcus, just give me one,” Rick said forcefully.

              Claire noticed the way Rick had started trembling.  “Rick, come sit down over here while Marcus gets you some water to take it with.”

              Rick let himself be guided over to the chair in which he’d been sitting.  He sat and put his head in his hands.  Marcus found a pitcher of water and a glass, he brought them to Rick.

              “Here you go, Rick,” Marcus said and held them out to him.

              Rick took them from Marcus and managed to get the pill into him.  “I don’t want to have to take those damn things the rest of my life,” he said as he sat back in the chair.

              Marcus and Claire drew two chairs over close to him.  Marcus said, “Rick, what are you taking them for?”

              “Mental trauma I guess is how you’d say it,” Rick said as he looked at Marcus.

              Marcus noticed that Rick’s pupils were dilated.  “Rick, when did you take the pill Ben gave you?”

              “I have no idea.  I picked Gina up around six and we talked for I guess a half hour or so until I had an … episode and then she drove me to the Watering Hole because it was close.  I don’t really remember much after that until Ben woke me up and gave me a pill.  Then he drove me home.  I fell asleep here in the chair and then you just arrived.  What time is it?” Rick said.

              Marcus swore.  “I should have asked that before I gave you that pill.  It’s quarter ’til ten.”  Marcus started taking off his coat.  “I’m going to have to stay with you to make sure you’re ok on that much medication.  Have you ever taken cannabis before tonight?”

              “No.  Just vodka.  Lots of vodka.  It seems to work better than any other alcohol,” Rick said.

              “Oh boy,” Marcus said.

              Claire asked, “Does this have something to do with Papa?”

              “No, Claire,” Rick said.  “My mother.  She was abusive and I killed her and that’s all I can say at the moment or else you’re going to have your hands full.”

              Marcus and Claire were stunned into silence by his statement and Rick began laughing.  “Oh, Claire, it’s not funny, but I’d rather laugh right now than cry.  I know you never expected an illegitimate brother, let alone one who’s a murderer.  Oh, and Canadian, to boot.”

              “Canadian?” Claire said.

              Rick laughed harder.  “I just told you I’m a murderer and you’re more surprised over me being Canadian.  I’m sorry.  I think that second pill is starting to affect me already.”

              Claire smiled a little.  “When you’re able, I would like to understand that statement about killing your mother.  Not now, though.”

              “Right,” Rick agreed.  “Marcus, will you open the back door there for a moment?”

              “Uh, sure.” Marcus did as Rick asked and the deputy whistled.

              In a moment, a furry animal scurried past Marcus.  “Go ahead and shut it now or else they’re all gonna be in here.  Seven ferrets loose in here is a little much for me right now,” Rick said as Curtis clambered onto his lap.

              Claire moved away a little.

              “It’s ok, Claire.  This is Curtis.  He’s my friend and also works with me,” Rick said.

              Claire laughed.  “Jack has told us about it, but I’ve never been close to a ferret before.”

              “He’s perfectly tame and loves attention,” Rick said as he picked Curtis up and shook him a little.  This was Rick’s invitation to play.  Curtis squirmed and Rick sat him down.  Curtis bounced around on Rick’s lap, apparently ready to roughhouse.

              “So you carry him around in your coat pocket?” Claire asked.  “Why?”

              Talking about Curtis would take Rick’s mind off of other things.  “Well, it started out as a joke when I worked in South Dakota.  I just put him in my pocket one day and went to the sheriff’s office where I worked.  I wanted to scare my boss and it worked.  The funny thing was Curtis liked it in there and started wanting to come with me every day.  So I took him. 

“I was investigating a murder and Curtis hopped out of my pocket without me noticing.  He was little then, so I didn’t really feel him moving around.  Anyway, he came bouncing back to me and, when I picked him up, he had a button in his mouth.  It turned out that it was from the killer’s coat.  That’s how we found him and brought him to justice.”

              “I’ve taken him to work ever since.  I’ve worked hard at training him and he’s very useful.  Not only that, he keeps me sane sometimes when I have flashbacks,” Rick said.  “So it’s the best of both worlds, I guess you’d say.”

              Curtis suddenly leaped over onto Claire’s lap and she gasped.  “What do I do?  Will he bite?”

              “No.  Just pet him.  He likes his belly scratched.  Oh, boy.  That second pill is really getting to me,” Rick said and leaned his head back against the chair as he was struck by a wave of dizziness.

              “Rick, you should really lie down.  I’ll help you,” Marcus said as Claire started playing with Curtis.

              No sooner did Marcus get Rick into bed than he slipped into a deep slumber.

              Sunlight on his face woke Rick the next morning.  It was painfully bright.  He rolled over and encountered a warm body.  A female body.  Rick cracked one eye open and saw Gina looking down at him.

              “Lovely, this is a pleasant surprise.  What time is it?” he asked in a sleep-roughened voice.

              She brushed hair back from his face.  “A little after nine,” Gina answered.  She sat beside him.  She didn’t feel it was any more improper than sitting on his lap last night. “Marcus said you slept through the night.  I’m glad.”

              Rick searched back through his memory and the previous evening came to him.  He smiled as he thought about Claire’s acceptance of him.  It felt good that at least one sister wasn’t adverse to the idea of having a brother.  He pushed up onto an elbow.  Looking down at himself, he was glad that he was still clothed.

              “Where is the good doctor?  And Claire?  Did they stay the whole night?” Rick asked.

              “No.  Marcus said they stayed with you until sometime after one in the morning and then left.  Claire was tired,” Gina said.  “Marcus came back this morning and you were still sleeping.  He was here when I arrived and then he left to go to the clinic.”

              “Yeah, Claire’s pretty far along now.  I hope the stress of this doesn’t cause problems for her or the baby,” Rick said.

              Gina said, “I’m sure she’s fine.  You have a visitor,” and pointed behind Rick.

              He rolled back over to see Jack sitting in a chair in the other room. 
Oh, boy.  I wonder how this is going to go.  I’m sure he knows by now.
  Rick slowly got up from the bed and stretched.  He was glad that he didn’t get dizzy.  In his stocking feet, Rick walked over to the chair closest to Jack and sat down.

              Jack sat forward a little in his chair and studied Rick, who stayed silent.  The younger man’s clear, blue eyes roamed over him, but Rick couldn’t tell what Jack was thinking, which was rare.