Jayded (42 page)

“
I will call him in a little while. I think I may have eaten something last night that didn
’
t agree with me. My stomach feels crappy,
”
I tell her.

Kinsey stands up.
“
Do you want me to pick you up something?
”

“
No, I
’
m fine. I
’
m just going to make some toast.
”

“
Okay, well you rest, and I
’
ll get started on packing up the office.
”

I take another sip of water.
“
Okay, I
’
ll be there within the next couple of hours.
”

I
take a nap and wake up feeling rejuvenated, but my mind quickly drifts to Kyle, and my energy immediately deflates. There
’
s a piece missing from my heart now, and the pain is utterly sickening. What the hell am I going to do? What if he doesn
’
t answer his phone? Am I supposed to see him at work and pretend the two of us never happened?

I guess I
’
m going to have to prepare myself for the inevitable. It
’
s going to hurt like hell to see him at work, but I took the risk, and now I have to deal with the consequences. I have to put my big-girl panties on and just deal with this. It may destroy me, but I
’
ve gotten through worse.

I go upstairs to freshen up, but before I head out to meet Kinsey at the office, I call my brother.

He answers on the first ring.
“
Max?
”

“
Hey Luke.
”

I hear a sigh of relief on the other end.
“
Max, I have been worried sick over you. I am so sorry Dad showed up. He promised me he wouldn
’
t. I seriously wanted to
kill
him for that. How are you doing? Are you okay?
”
he asks, clearly worried.

“
Luke, Kinsey told me everything. I
’
m sorry I didn
’
t give you a chance to explain. He caught me off-guard. I wasn
’
t ready to face him yet. I made myself look like a fool, though. I just couldn
’
t hold myself together. I totally lost it,
”
I admit.

“
Who the hell cares what anyone thinks? I told Dad you needed time, but it
’
s clear he didn
’
t care what I thought. Max, I swear, I am
so
sorry! If I knew he would do that, I would have cancelled the dinner.
”

My brother seems heartbroken over this.

I put my shoes on.
“
He probably would have just shown up here anyways. You did nothing wrong, Luke. Don
’
t beat yourself over the head about it, okay?
”

“
Max, are you seeing that kid Kyle?
”
Luke asks.

Now it
’
s my turn to sigh.
“
We were more than friends if that
’
s what you mean.
”

“
I think he
’
s a good fit for you. Anyone that stands up for you the way he did is good in my eyes.
”

Wow. I
’
m shocked. I
’
ve never heard those words come out of his mouth before. If he can make this good of an impression on Luke, I know my heart has made the right decision. Kyle is truly spectacular. My heart twinges with pain.

“
Well Cody ruined it for us. He came in this morning like a freaking psycho!
”
I explain.

Luke sighs in aggravation.
“
What a dick! Listen, if it is meant to be it will be. Just relax and give it some space. Kyle will come around in time. Either way, you still have to see him at work. I guess that
’
s why people say
‘
don
’
t mix business with pleasure,
’
huh?
”

I chuckle.
“
Yeah, you
’
re right about that one. I have to get to the office to help Kinsey with packing. We might not be leaving as scheduled. I have get to the office to see how far behind we are.
”

“
Okay, sis. Call me if you need any help.
”

“
I will. Love you.
”

I smile. He can always make me smile.
“
Love you too, Luke.
”

I start the car, and as I pull out, I get sick out of nowhere. I slam my hand over my mouth, put the car in park, and quickly open the door to vomit outside. Thank God I have a napkin on the side of the door. I
’
m one hot mess. What the hell did I eat last night? I tried a little of everything, but I
’
ve never had a problem with that before.

I pull up to the office and grab a tiny bottle of Scope from my purse to wash out my mouth before I head up.

“
Hey! How are you feeling?
”
Kinsey asks when I walk in. She
’
s boxing up the bookshelves.

I dramatically plop down on the plush green chair and exhale.
“
Not good. I just got sick on the way here. Something I ate last night is not agreeing with me at all. I couldn
’
t even hold the toast down.
”

Kinsey stops putting the books in the box.
“
Are you sure you
’
re not pregnant?
”
she asks and then laughs as if she
’
s just joking. I don
’
t laugh. A light bulb clicks on.

Now that I think about it, I was supposed to get my period last week. I
’
ve been totally preoccupied, so I haven
’
t even noticed. This is not good. I can feel the blood drain from my face.

“
Max?
”
Kinsey says, rushing to my side. My hearing is now muffled with a high-pitched ring in my left ear.
“
Max, your face just got pale as hell. Are you okay?
”
she questions, clearly worried.

I nod my head, unable to talk. I think I may be in shock.

“
Kinsey, I never got my period last week. I haven
’
t even realized it. Do you think I could really be pregnant?
”
I ask her, hoping maybe she
’
ll tell me no.

She goes into the bathroom and grabs me a wet cloth. She hands it to me before she answers.
“
I think it
’
s time to take one of those early pregnancy tests. You didn
’
t use protection?
”

I place the cloth over my forehead.
“
We did at first and then I guess we just got too caught up in the moment. We didn
’
t really think much about it. Shit! That sounds so bad out loud, doesn
’
t it?
”

Kinsey laughs.
“
Yeah, it does. So don
’
t repeat it.
”

I can
’
t help but laugh. She
’
s always way too honest. My mind is just running in circles. It
’
s got be something I ate. There
’
s just no way I can be pregnant, right? Wrong. I feel like I have just entered into a dream state, and I
’
m hoping I get to wake up from this nightmare.

“
So, what do I do now?
”

Kinsey stands up and grabs her car keys.
“
You take a pregnancy test. Come on. Let
’
s go.
”

I take a deep breath and will myself to get up. With each step, I feel like I
’
m sinking farther and farther into quicksand; I
’
m headed into the abyss. What the hell am I going to do if I am pregnant? How the hell is this going to affect the new partnership? And more importantly, what the hell would Kyle say? Would he tell me to get an abortion? I
’
ve never been in this predicament before. I
’
m not too sure if I could even bring myself to get an abortion.

“
Okay, you go in and buy it. I don
’
t think I can even do that right now,
”
I tell her.

Kinsey rubs my thigh as if to tell me it will be alright.
“
I
’
ll go in for you, but if I see someone I know, you
’
re going to owe me big time!
”

It
’
s always like Kinsey to crack a joke at this time. Thank God for her. I don
’
t know what I would do if I had to do this alone.

We pull up to the drugstore. I wait in the car as planned. Once she purchases the test, we head back to the office. I take the same seat again as she opens the box and unwraps the test. She reads me the directions and then hands me the stick. I look at it, unable to move or coordinate my muscles. I can
’
t believe I
’
m really doing this.

“
Max, honey, it
’
s not the end of the world if you end up pregnant. Even if Kyle won
’
t take part in it, you still have me. And there
’
s no reason you can
’
t raise a baby by yourself. What are you so afraid of?
”
Kinsey asks.

She
’
s right, what am I so afraid of? We both knew this could be a possibility without protection, and the pill isn
’
t one hundred percent foolproof anyway. I suck it up, hold my head high, and head to the bathroom. After doing my business, I set the stick on top of the bathroom counter. Kinsey and I stare at the clock, and when the time
’
s up, I peek over at the stick.

“
Holy shit!
”

Kinsey looks over my shoulder, gasps loudly, and covers her mouth.
“
Oh my God, Max. You
’
re pregnant! Holy shit is right!
”
she yells, jumping up and down.

Everything surrounding me begins to blur into a black darkness with tiny specks of stars twinkling around me. I hear Kinsey
’
s voice fading far in the distance, sinking deeper and deeper until she
’
s almost nonexistent.

Splashes of ice-cold water smack my face and snap me out of the dark. I look around, confused.
“
What happened?
”
I ask. I
’
m now sitting on the floor against the sink cabinet.

Kinsey has a wet cloth against my forehead.
“
You passed out, Max. Are you okay?
”
she asks with panic in her voice.

She helps me up and sits me on the toilet.
“
I think so. I don
’
t know what happened. I had this weird vision that I was pregnant,
”
I tell her, snickering.

Her eyes grow big.
“
Um, Max, you are pregnant,
”
she tells me, pointing to the positive stick.

I almost want to faint again. I pick it up to look.
“
What am I going to do?
”
I whisper, not taking my eyes off of it.

“
You need to figure out what
’
s going on with you and Kyle before you make any hasty decisions,
”
she advises me.

I stand up and head back into my office to lie down on my couch.
“
I
’
m not having an abortion if that
’
s what you think, but I
’
m not so sure I want to mention this to Kyle anytime soon. I can
’
t be more than three weeks. Anything could happen between now and the second trimester.
”