Infinity & Always (13 page)

“Nope.”

He
looks at me like he doesn’t know me. His brows knit together
and he takes a deep breath, “Aren’t you annoyed?”

“Yes,
I’m more than annoyed,” I answer, trying to keep my tone
civil.

“You
don’t look it, in fact, you kind of look like you don’t
care.”

His
eyes give him away. They look hurt, as he tries to keep his face
blank of emotion. I smirk at him, pointing my fork I say, “I do
care, Knox, that’s why I’m trying to not think about it,
otherwise…” I shrug not finishing.

“You’ll
go beat her ass?” he asks and I give him my biggest smile.

He
lets the subject drop while I eat my food. I know it’s late and
I shouldn’t be eating, but I’m starving. After I’m
done I head off to bed crashing the minute I hit the pillow.

“Hey
darlin’,” Knox calls and shakes my body, cracking open an
eye I look at him.

“What?”
I mumble into my pillow, he smirks at me before brushing my hair off
my face.

“It’s
time to get up.”

Lifting
myself up, I look around the room confused, I only just got into bed.
But I see the sun is shining and he is dressed for work.

“Sorry,
did I really sleep all night?” I wonder out loud.

“Yes,
you were out of it when I came to bed. I had my wicked way with you
of course…” he shrugs.

“I’d
believe it too,” I smile, teasing him back. He tells me he has
to go and gives me a kiss on the cheek. His movements seem hesitant
like he is waiting for me to do or say something.

“Okay
babe, see you later, don’t forget I have that photo shoot
tonight so I’ll be late.”

He
nods before sliding off the bed. Grabbing his hand, I pull him back
to me and kiss him properly. “Now we can both have a good day.”
He nods and grins at me before walking out the door.

After
a shower, I decided to blow off my lecture today and spend the day
working on my paper. By two, o’clock I’m finished and my
eyes hurt. Becky and Abbey have been texting all morning reminding me
about the shoot. I pack my uniform in my bag and make my way to
campus parking, where we are meeting.

“Hey,
where were you today?” Abbey asks when I walk up to them.

“Studying
at home.”

I
reply climbing onto the bus. I take a seat behind Becky and flick her
hair. “Hey, Bex.” She waves at me while keeping her nose
in her book. I sit beside our quarterback, Georgia and the four of us
joke around all the way to the hotel. Once we get there, we are lead
to a conference room, where the photo shoot is set up. We take our
group pictures, then the individual ones for our website and the
calendar. It’s so much fun, everyone is messing around and
doing different poses, some of us are using props and a very sexy
Santa.

“Holy
crap!” Abbey whispers.

“Damn,”
is all I can manage when I see the hot guy dressed in Santa pants and
nothing else. We all stare as he takes his position standing in front
of the camera, he looks over and smiles at us, and I swear we all
melt just a bit. Coach calls everyone over to stand around him and I
have never seen a bunch of girls move as fast. It is almost like a
stampede.

I
can’t help laughing as Becky and one of the other girls jockey
for a position at his side. “What’s so funny Mortenson?”
Coach yells at me.

“Nothing,”
I clear my throat.

“You
down front.”

She
says pointing at me. I shake my head no and step back a little until
she yells at me again. I run to stand in front of sexy Santa, not
knowing what to do, and look around.

“Get
down on one knee,” the photographer hisses and asks for another
girl to kneel opposite me. We hold our helmets under our arms and he
takes the shot. He makes Santa flex his muscles a few times and we
all drool.

Once
it’s over, I walk over to coach to see if I pissed her off. She
laughs at me and says no, that she was having fun.

“Not
funny,” I smile at her.

“Of
course it was, you should have seen your face.”

I
swear this lady is evil. “You do know my fiancé is
bigger and hotter.”

She
laughs at me and pats my shoulder before walking away. I pack my
uniform again and sling my bag over my shoulder. When we are back on
campus, we are warned about the game on Saturday and not to be late.

“You
coming over to the diner?” Abbey asks.

“Nah,
I’m going home to hang out with Knox.”

Walking
across to the apartment I spot Max heading to the bar and wave at
him. It seems they work far more hours at the bar now since they
bought their uncle out last year. He wanted to retire and Richard
offered to buy the bar for them, but they wanted to do it alone.
Unfortunately, the bank didn’t give them the full amount so I
dipped into my trust fund and became a third owner; although I chose
to be a silent partner.

Dad
wasn’t happy about it, but because of all the Ben shit he found
a way for me to sign my money over to him. Once Ben lost that battle,
Dad gave me back twenty-five percent of my money and put the rest
back into my trust fund. I was able to help Knox and Max with the
bar, buy my house, and I still have enough to live on for quite a few
years.

I
also used some of it to fund my computer program, with Paige’s
help. She is one of America’s top one hundred entrepreneurs
under twenty-five. She gave me some good advice about starting my own
business, but I’m waiting for a few more years before I decide
to do it.

“I’m
home,” I yell when I walk into the apartment but don’t
get a response. Dropping my bag, I kick off my shoes. I then hear the
sounds of guitar coming from the room and walk slowly over. I stand
outside the closed door and listen for a few minutes. I can hear Knox
singing softly and smile, reaching out I open the door finding him
sitting on the stool with his guitar and his headphones on. He strums
away while in his own world. I honestly missed this. We used to sit
in here for hours while he played and sang. I would just listen and
get lost in the lyrics. He lets out a deep sigh and changes songs,
this one is a soft, sad, melody, and he closes his eyes as he plays.

Resting
my head against the doorframe I listen to him, the tune is almost
tragic. He begins to hum along while his eyes are closed. I don’t
recognize the song so I watch him. His face is too sad as he gets
caught up in the melody and I wonder what is going on inside his
head. I have to swallow hard to stop tears from spilling down my
face. He always gives off the impression of a tough guy, someone not
to be messed with, which is true. But seeing him look like this like
his heart is breaking is really getting to me.

Walking
inside, I rest my hand on his shoulder and his eyes spring open, his
face breaks into one of his huge smiles when he sees me.

“Hey
darlin’,” he says, taking off his headphones.

“Hi,”
I whisper, then clear my throat.

He
gives me a puzzled look then pulls me onto his lap, wrapping me in
his arms.

“What’s
with the sad face?”

“Nothing,
I was just listening to you play,” I smile at him.

He
kisses my lips softly, “How long were you standing there?”

“A
few minutes.”

He
smiles at me and kisses me again, telling me how much he missed me
today. His lips make their way down my neck and along my collarbone.
A soft moan escapes from my lips and Knox stands up, taking me into
our bed. He gently pulls off my t-shirt before laying me down. His
mouth tastes every part of me, leaving a trail of hot wet kisses
behind.

His
hands slowly peel off my jeans tracing back up my bare legs. Reaching
out, I open his belt and zipper, trying to push his jeans off. He
helps me out and pushes them to the floor along with his boxers. At
the sight of him I am almost purring, needing to feel him inside me.
I hook my legs around him and pull him close with my heels, my hands
pull off his t-shirt and glide down his hard chest and abs.

He
sucks a breath in through his teeth at my touch and closes his eyes
briefly.

“I
missed this,” I whisper.

Knox
slides his hand under my legs and lifts up slightly as he pushes
inside me, we both groan as he fills me up. Our bodies move together
slowly at first, building into a wild dance. He kisses me hard then
softly, biting my lower lip. My hands grip his shoulders pulling him
closer, deeper. I want him so badly. I want every part of him to
touch me.

I
let out a deep moan as my body soars with each thrust. Knox slides a
hand over my hip, gripping me tight. I feel like I’m flying, my
body comes apart as I grip Knox to me. With another hard thrust he
groans, collapsing on top of me. Our bodies are slick with sweat and
Knox presses a soft kiss just below my ear.

“I
love you darlin’.”

“I
love you too,” I cling on to him, refusing to let him climb off
me.

“Hey,
you okay?” He asks, looking into my eyes.

Nodding
my head, I loosen my hold, and he rolls onto the bed but pulls me
into his arms.

“Spill
it blue eyes,” he says, tilting my chin up with is thumb and
forefinger.

“Spill
what?”

“The
reason why you look sad darlin’.”

“No
reason, I’m not sad. I’m happy,” I reply, earning a
raised eyebrow and skeptical look.

“I
was wondering what that song was you were playing.”

“Oh,”
he frowns, “it’s something I wrote a few months ago.”

Turing
my face, I look up at him. “It was really sad.”

He
shrugs and places a kiss on the tip of my nose. “I was sad when
I wrote it.”

My
heart constricts and a wave of guilt washes over me, obviously I was
making him sad. But that song was really, really sad, like the way I
felt after Summer died.

“Hey,
what are you looking like that for?” he asks.

“No
reason,” turning around I press my back into his chest.
Although we were having a hard time, I never once thought that Knox
had that kind of pain in his heart. Silent tears fall from my eyes
and I feel such guilt for causing him to hurt so much.

“Okay
darlin’, I’ll make dinner then we can head over to the
bar and have a drink,” he says kissing my shoulder, as he
climbs out of bed. I can’t answer him for fear of my voice
betraying me. Knox pulls on his jeans and stops, he bends down so
that we are eye level. When he sees my tears, he frowns wiping them
away.

“Hey,
hey what’s this darlin’?”

He
lifts me up into his arms pressing my head against his chest. I can
feel his heart beat slow and steady as he rocks me gently.

“Why
are you crying darlin’? Did I hurt you?” his warm lips
brush off the tip of my ear. I shake my head no. “Tell me then,
why are you upset?”

“Just
hearing that song and now I know that you wrote it,” I blubber
against his chest.

“Darlin’,
you don’t even know the words,” he says, kissing my
temple and squeezing me.

“I
know, but it sounded so sad and if you wrote it that means that you
were sad and only I could have made you like that.”

He
pushes me back so I can see his face. He is smiling at me and I don’t
get it. I’m not sure how a song so sad can have anyone smiling
like that.

“It
is not about how you made me feel darlin’, it’s about how
I was making you feel.”

I’m
confused and he chuckles when he sees my face.

“I’ll
sing it to you sometime. Now get out of bed and dry that beautiful
face we have fun to be had.”

After
a quick shower and dinner, we are walking across to the bar. My mood
is somber and I can’t seem to pull myself out of it. Knox is
talking about work and I’m not even listening to him. He holds
my hand in his as we walk into the bar, it’s full again, and
Max looks overwhelmed. Taking a seat at the end of the bar I wait for
Knox to bring me a drink, he talks with Max for a few minutes before
walking back over to me.

“Hey
darlin’,” he pouts, leaning his elbow on the bar and
resting his chin in his palm.

“Yes?”

“Chase
can’t make it tonight and Max needs help,” he says,
looking apologetic.

“Okay,
that’s fine I have a game tomorrow anyway,” I shrug,
taking my drink from him.

“You
do? You never said,” he says, tracing my lips with his finger.

“I
know it’s just a friendly one, no big deal.”

“All
your games are a big deal darlin’, tell me when and where, and
I’ll be there.” Leaning closer he kisses me. I just nod
and smile. He looks at me sadly for a minute then gets to work. I
listen to the band that’s playing. The music is good, but I
much prefer to hear Knox singing.

I
can’t seem to pull myself out this funk even when Amber starts
her usual back and forth joking with me. I zone out while everyone
laughs, dances, and makes out all around me. Checking my watch I
frown at the time, it’s only ten o’clock. I thought it
was later. Finishing my drink, I wave Knox over, he strolls to me
with a sexy smile.

“Yes,
darlin’?”

“I’m
going home.”

He
looks puzzled, “Why? I’m sorry our date night got ruined,
but we can hang out in a few minutes.”

“It’s
okay I’m tired anyway,” I give him a kiss and leave.

Knox

“What’s
up with her?” Max asks when he sees Bailey leave.

“Nothing,”
I shake my head and get back to work. The rest of the night goes by
fast and we are closing before I even realize I hadn’t taken a
break. We clear out the bar, and I start sweeping the floor, leaving
Max to restock the fridges. We work in silence until three in the
morning.

“Let’s
get out of here, bro,” I call out to Max. He walks through the
beads with his jacket on and flips off the lights. I lock the door
and we set off home. Neither of us talks for a few minutes.