I am Wolf (The Wolfboy Chronicles) (10 page)

The belongings of the other wolf.

S
unrise came and I
was about to
change back. I heard the sound of a car engine in the distance and turned my
head. It came over the hill, its headlights flashed in my direction. Afraid of
being seen by soldiers I grabbed all my stuff in my arms that were almost human
now and started running. Slowly and still painfully my body transformed back
while I ran. I had to find a place to hide, I thought and looked around
desperately searching for something, a barn, a farm, anything.

But there was nothing but the forest in front of me.
Hiding in there was my only chance.

I was still panting heavily as I ran towards the dark
forest, my eyes fixated on the large trunks of the oak trees in front of me.
The Hoia-Baciu Forest. No one ever went in there. In there I would be safe and
the world would be safe from me. I would never meet a living soul, I thought.
It was believed the forest was haunted and rumors of the strange things that
had happened to people who dared to cross the borders of this forest were
widely known throughout the entire country. Locals avoided it as it was
considered to be a place of pure evil. Everybody knew that once a person walked
among those trees, they were able to hear the rustle that came from another
world where all the fears of the human would come to life. Only foolish people
would venture into such a place. Stories went of locals that had gone into the
woods anyway to chop wood or pick blueberries or flowers, stories were told
that even from the first steps into the wood, they were hit by inexplicable
states of nausea, anxiety, headaches and, sometimes, even burns on their skin.
The Hoia-Baciu Forest was a place people were even afraid to talk about since
the place was considered to be cursed and a dwelling of the devil.

I stopped in front of the row of trees. They were tall
like they were they trying to reach all the way into heaven. Between them it
was dark, pitch dark, yet somehow I was able to spot a light in there
somewhere. Like the sun was shining in there when it wasn’t even shining
outside where I was standing because of the heavy snow-filled clouds. It woke
something inside of me, some kind of curiosity, a longing to go in there and
see it for myself, what it could be. I looked back at the village one last time
before I took my first step in between the trees and entered the haunted
forest.

As soon as I set the first foot on the soil I heard a
whisper in my head. I gasped and looked around but saw nothing. I stopped and
listened. The voices were small and sounded like they were blowing in the wind.
I realized I wasn’t afraid. On the contrary I felt completely calm inside. I
dropped all my belongings on the soil and got dressed.

With the rest of my things in my hands I took another
step into the forest and soon realized that I didn’t feel nauseous nor anxious.
Not the least bit. I had no headache or burns on the skin. This was strange to
me, because as I walked towards the light inside of the forest and walked
deeper and deeper in I felt calm and happy. The small voices were whispering
but never bothered me. I didn’t even feel cold in there, I realized. It was
like the strong grip of winter couldn’t penetrate the dense forest. The forest
was so closed up there was almost no snow on the soil where I walked and the
cold icy wind wasn’t there anymore.

After a few minutes I felt uncomfortable. I realized I
wasn’t alone, something was following me. I turned my head a couple of times
and noticed some strange shadows accompanying me. I wondered if they were the
source of the whispering voices. Soon the shadows didn’t seem to be the only
ones following me as other forms, lights and figures appeared between the
bushes and tree trunks, more voices and different colors in the air. I found it
truly enchanting and had to stop and watch. Bright colors and balls of lights
were circling me, the voices appeared to be singing. I tried to reach out and
touch them but couldn’t grab them. They were flying in the wind, letting
themselves be carried in the air, twirling lightly and carefree. I smiled and
soon I laughed. I felt so safe. I sighed and wondered how I felt so safe in a
place that normal people feared and believed to be the dwelling place of evil
itself. Was that because I was different? Was it because I myself was evil? Was
that why I felt so incredibly comfortable in the place of malice?

With all the strange creatures following me I found a
nice clearing next to small river where fresh water sprung from a rock. I
leaned over and drank with great thirst. Then I sat by a rock and rested. Where
was I going? I stared at the river and spotted fish in the water. Bright light
appeared mysteriously between the tree trunks and it felt almost like spring. I
sighed with relief and stared at the sack I received from the old woman Camelia
in the village. My heart was pounding in my chest while I wondered what was in
it. I picked it up and opened it. I took out an old notebook. It was all wrapped
in a beautiful silk scarf. I unwrapped it and stared at the cover. It had a
gold emblem on the front, showing a big paw print similar to that of a wolf, I
thought.

I touched it gently and then something truly amazing
happened. It began to glow. I gasped and threw the book on the ground. As soon
as my fingers let go of the emblem the glowing slowly faded and disappeared.

I stared at the book for a while, catching my breath.
What was all this? I reached down and picked it up again. With my finger I
stroked the emblem and soon the golden paw was glowing again, this time even
stronger than before, a bright light that almost blinded me. I gasped then
grabbed the front cover and opened the book.

Inside it the pages were shining just as bright as the
emblem had. Many words were written on the pages, but I didn’t recognize any of
them. Sentence after sentence I tried to read, but I didn’t understand a word.
It was written in a different language or something. My mother had taught me to
read and even taught me some Latin. Even if my siblings and I had been banned
from our school the past year my mother had seen it as her job to make sure her
children were well educated so she had tirelessly taught us language and
history.

“Education is what is going to save this world,” my
mother used to say. “Uneducated people are easier to oppress.”

I missed her while turning page after page of text
written in a strange language, with letters I didn’t even recognize.

Disappointed I closed the book with a sigh. Then I
wrapped the book in the scarf again and put it all back in the sack. I looked
up but could hardly see the sky between the treetops. Where were the birds? I
wondered. There seemed to be no ordinary life in this forest. Or was it just
hiding from me? Most animals were hibernating now, maybe that was it. I
wondered how I managed to always find food as the wolf even in wintertime.
Would I be able to find anything tonight? Would it be enough? Would my turning
into the beast scare all my new companions away? All these strange creatures,
made from lights and shadows, did they already know who or what I was? Was that
why they didn’t harm me?

I sighed deeply and rose to my feet. The shadows moved
and the colors flickered like they were afraid to come too close. Small
whispering voices were constantly surrounding me. Even surrounded by all these
strange creatures, I never felt so alone.

I
slept most of
the day. I found a
small cave under some rocks and put my head down on my sack of clothes and fell
into a deep sleep. I dreamt of Catalina. For the first time in many days she
was in my dreams again. She was in a field of flowers, dancing, spinning while
the light creatures and color creatures from the haunted forest surrounded her
and sang. Her eyes were closed as she danced in a sunray in the middle of all
the flowers. She looked so beautiful, I thought and walked closer. It was dark
where I was standing and she was in the light. I began walking, trying to
escape the darkness, but it seemed to follow me. Every step I took it followed
and covered me. I looked down at my body and realized I was the wolf. Catalina
hadn’t seen me, she was still dancing in the light and as hard as I tried I
couldn’t get closer to her. I couldn’t escape my darkness and enter her world
of lights.

I woke up with a small scream. My cheeks were wet. I
had been crying. I wanted so badly to get to her, to see her once again. I
didn’t quite understand why. I had only spent a few hours with her, yet I felt
a strong urge to be with her again, to protect her. I felt a pinch in my
stomach as I thought about where she could be now. Where had Officer Alexandru
taken her? Had he interrogated her like he did me? Had he beaten her? Had he
sent her on a train to one of those camps like he did to me? I shook my head.
No I had to forget about her, had to get her out of my head, I thought and
looked out of my cave. The small voices were still there, so were the colors
and the lights and shadows on the trees. What were those? I kept wondering.
They seemed nothing like the creatures from my mother’s stories. I went out of
the cave. As I did, the lights and colors talked faster and began twirling
among each other. Then they disappeared in between the trees. I could hear them
talk and giggle.

“What are you?” I asked. “What kind of strange
creatures are you?”

The forest suddenly went quiet for the first time. No
sounds of talking voices, singing voices or giggling anymore. I was afraid I
had scared them so I drew back towards the cave. The last thing I wanted was to
have anyone else be afraid of me. I walked backwards when one of the bright
lights came closer to me. It came all the way to my face, then circled my head
a couple of times.

“What kind of creature are you?” it asked with the
finest small voice.

I smiled. It sounded like a child, I thought. Like a
little girl. “Me?” I asked. Then I laughed.

“Why are you laughing?” the light asked.

I looked down my body. “Because it’s kind of obvious,
isn’t it?”

“No. What are you?”

“Well, I’m human. My name is Sami.”

Whispering voices behind the trees became louder, some
were giggling again. The small light ball in front of me began circling my head
again. “Well you look weird,” it said.

I laughed again. “I’m the one who looks weird?”

“Yes, you are. Very weird,” she said sounding slightly
offended.

“Well, then I guess I’m Sami the weird.”

The small voices behind the trees giggled harder. The
ball of light circling my head didn’t laugh.

“And who might I be talking to?” I asked.

“What do you mean? You’re talking to me.”

I chuckled. “I mean what is your name? You do have a
name, don’t you?”

The light snorted. “I do. But I’m not telling you.”

“Then how will I know what to call you?”

The light stopped circling and froze in the air. Then
it turned completely red. A second later it darted through the air and hid
behind the trees.

I was sad to see it go. I was enjoying finally having
someone to talk to in my solitude. “Please don’t leave. I didn’t mean to offend
you,” I said.

I sighed and looked in the direction where it had gone
in behind the trees. The voices had quieted down and I felt so alone again.

“I’m sorry?” I said resignedly. Maybe they didn’t
understand, I thought.

I was about to turn around and walk back to my cave
and solitude when suddenly the clearing became extremely windy. My hair and my
clothes were all lifted up in the air as a small twirl wind appeared and
started spinning around me causing me to be pulled up in the air. I grabbed on
to a branch in a tree and held on to it till the wind quieted down just as
quickly as it had appeared. I fell from the tree and hit the ground. When I
looked up a hand was reaching out to me. I grabbed it and got up on my feet.
Then I lifted my head and gasped. A woman was standing right in front of me.
Her beauty astonished me, left me breathless. Her dress looked like it was made
from leaves and branches from the trees, her hair was big, red and curly. Her
skin was fair and pale, her eyes were as green as the grass and looked like
emeralds. They reminded me of someone, I thought. It was like I had seen them
before, but at this moment I couldn’t recall where. She was big, yet both
stunning and breathtaking.

“I’m sorry about that,” she said with a wondrous
singing voice. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“I ... I’m ... fine, I think,” I stuttered. Her
spectacular beauty had completely startled me.

She smiled enchanted. “Good. I’m glad. We can be a
little overwhelming when we appear.”