Authors: Shannon Dermott
To say my jaw dropped would be an
understatement. When he said nothing, the little green monster in me grew to
epic proportions. I felt like the hulk would burst through my skin. Maybe it
was the look he bestowed on me when I'd kissed him moments ago. Or maybe I knew
the truth. I'd chosen his best friend over him a number of times. What made me
feel as though he should choose me?
I turned to head towards the
labyrinth of hedges needing space, when strong hands gripped my shoulder and
arm, to position me in front of him. "I choose Mercy."
The crowd reacted with another
cheer that seemed mute next to my own thoughts. The casualness of how he
answered made me forget the pregnant pause that had preceded his words.
Morgana's eyes were like angry pearls of silver matching the gleam of her hair.
"As you wish," Madeline
announced without betraying a single emotion. I wasn't sure she was happy or
pissed, but I guessed the later. Larrison was easy enough to read. His
blue-veined face mirrored the icy air that hovered around him.
Flynn threaded his fingers
through mine and led me off the playing field. I wanted to kill the Queen. What
if Rowen had won or someone else? Had I always been a choice of prizes? Was
that the true punishment? Was that why I'd been dolled up? Had Flynn
participated just to save me once again? And why did I keep finding myself in
impossible situations? I didn't think I brought this on myself or had I? I had
asked the favor of the Elven Queen, which was why I was in Fairy. But if I
hadn't asked that favor long ago... would Luke have been set free without my
interference?
Through the double doors and down
the long hallways of marble, we ended up at my door. In a cloud of confusion, I
was in my room when Flynn decided to distract me. His arms wound around me as I
was lost in his kiss. His tongue teased mine as he gripped my hips and pulled
me flush to him.
His hands moved to the small of
my back and up until I felt a tiny release from the confines of my dress. It
took me a moment to realize he was undoing the buttons or clasped that held me
captive in a prison of fabric.
I jerked back. "What are you
doing?"
For a second, he appeared
mystified until a bit of anger formed in his brow. "Making you mine.
You've finally admitted your feelings. We can move forward with our lives
now."
Admitted my feelings? Then I
remembered telling him I loved him and how much I needed him. It was his turn
to step back.
His brows knit together in
bewilderment. "Were you lying?"
I could see the hurt begin to
blossom on his face. I inched towards him. "No, I love you Flynn. I do.
More than I should and maybe for a longer time than I care to admit."
His cocky grin spread wide as he
held up his hands to cup my face. And I too stepped back from him.
"But..."
"But what?" he asked,
his eyes darkened again as his hands fell to his sides. "Luke." He
shook his head like he was trying to rid himself of a bad memory while turning
away from me. "Of course it’s Luke."
There wasn't time for me to
respond before he swung around and asked? "Has your mother ever told you
about the yearly Cambion meetings?"
When I didn't answer, he laughed
a little sourly. "Of course not. Every year, in a different city all over
the world, we congregate. The men get together and talk about the state of our
community or world peace for all I know we aren't allowed in."
"What about the women?"
I interjected.
He paused in his tirade of words.
"There aren’t very many Cambion women, when they give up their lives to
continue the race."
He sounded disgusted, and I knew
that his mother's death still weighed heavily on him.
"But the rest of us are
corralled together like cattle. Cambion fathers’ parade around their daughters
hoping one of us will be the guy that will protect their daughter from a live
of screwing to stay alive."
He rolled his eyes. "Like
they don't know what we are. But then again, it's the human in us. And every
year, I hoped that I didn't come across the one because I didn’t want be
saddled with a girl that I’d have to be with forever."
His chuckle sounded forced like
someone slapped him on the back to free it from his chest. "And then I
finally got it. I'd always felt bad to break up with a girl. But it never truly
bothered me too much because I knew that it was for the best. Until
Amanda."
He glanced up at the ceiling as
if he expected her to be there. And I became ill at the thought of what he was
about to say. Did he love her? Really love her?
"I didn't love her," he
said as if he heard my thoughts. "But I cared about her. And not just any
kind of way. She got me. She never nagged me about what I was doing. She never
pressured me or made me feel like a jerk. And a part of me wanted to love her.
Wanted her to be the one..."
His eyes became unfocused like
he'd drifted off into another world.
"But she wasn’t the one.
There was another girl that I couldn't shake. She got under my skin."
And my skin started to crawl. The
insane jealousy that kept rearing up should have been my clue.
"It wasn't just her body
that rocked off the charts." He mimed breast by cupping his hands to his
chest; then he pointed to his face. "It wasn't her stunning face."
His eyes found mine, and I
shivered.
"All those things were
great, but it was more than that. It was the little things like the shy way she
laughed, the big brain that filled her head, it was the way she had no clue
about how every guy in school secretly wanted to bang her."
He paused again while I gritted
my teeth wanting to strangle this girl because I was just that clueless in that
particular moment. I blamed jealousy over Amanda for the short circuit in my
brain.
"After breaking up with
Amanda, who by the way, has got like a heart of gold as dumb as that sounds; I
decided not to pursue the girl who that stirred me in ways no other had before.
Why would I?"
His eyes broke contact from mine.
"To only have her for a short time because she was human would be worse
than not having her at all." He waited for me to get it because his eyes
searched mine again. And it was like he sucked the air from the room. It didn't
matter that I'd heard parts of the story before. It was different now. We were
human in the Fey realm, and I didn't have my protector to shield me from my
emotions.
He stepped forward and punched me
with only his words. But it only took a few to be the knockout blow.
"And this girl was different
than all the rest." He gave a real laugh this time as he stood closer to
me. Again he shook his head like he couldn't fathom what he was about to say.
"This one girl that I wanted... didn't want me."
When he landed the gutshot, I
finally realized a little too late he was talking about me. I move forward only
for him to hold up a hand to stop me. "And I made her pay for my annoyance
at not being able to stop thinking about her, yet she hadn't even thought about
me."
"Flynn... I..."
Pain filled eyes lanced my own. I
closed my mouth.
"I teased her in the halls,
making comments here or there whenever I felt particularly vulnerable to her
spell on me." He chuffed or at least that was what the noise that came
from his mouth. "And wouldn't you know it; I decided to do the right
thing. I cleared the path for my best friend to go after her because he was the
better choice for a human girl. I'd manned up and realized that he needed
someone too. The shit that he had on his plate, he needed a nice girl like her.
So, I encouraged my friend Brent to invite this girl he’d been obsessing over
because she was best friends with the girl. And they show up. Top it off, she
ended up playing spin the bottle."
He'd backtracked to the wall and
leaned on it with his hands safely behind him. A soft thump came when he
settled his head back and began searching the ceiling again for something I
couldn’t see.
"When I spun the damn
bottle, I had no idea what was about to happen. When it landed on her, she was
clueless. Once she realized what happened, she looked horrified. Fucking
horrified at the thought of kissing me. And I'm pissed. I mean, what did this
girl have against me. I hid my anger because screw it; I was about to kiss her
and have a taste of her soul. I imagined just how sweet it was. And wouldn't
you know it. I kissed her and nothing."
A crack came as his fist
connected with the wall.
"I was so fucking confused,
I laughed my ass off. Because in all the time I was put in a room filled with
Cambion girls, I never had the feeling my father described to me. And I’d
always been fucking grateful because I didn't want a steady and I didn't want
to get a girl pregnant only to have her die. No way, no fucking how."
He pushed off the wall and
sauntered toward me. He threaded his fingers in my hair when he reached me. I
was too stunned to move. His mouth was on mine urging me with a flick of his
tongue against my lower lip to allow him access, and I did. Just when I thought
I would drown in his kiss, he pulled back. His hands went to fist at his sides.
"That girl was you. And I
was such a jackass because I was mad at myself for giving you up. I sent you
into his arms. Then, it was too late. You were his, when you belonged to me.
You were my redemption, my forever girl, and I’d given you up."
His saddened eyes turned hard,
flat and lackluster of any warmth that had been there. "Time and time
again, I tried to let the two people who were most like family to me, be. I
figured that if I couldn't have you, who better for you to be with. Hell, Luke,
who'd been a shadow of himself for years, was happy... so god damn happy."
He said the word like it was a
foreign language. "And all the shit he had to deal with, I'm thinking
yeah, I should back off. It's not like I'd ever wanted the girl, a family or
future. There would never be a family for me because if you had my kid, you’d
die.”
His words reverberated through
the room.
He signed. “But then there were
times you’d say things or do things to draw me back into your web. And I
thought she knew it could never work with the angel because it wasn’t a
fairytale and shit would get real for Luke if he were ever found out."
A strand of my hair twined around
his finger drawing my eye to it. His next muttered words brought my attention
back to his face.
"And that whole time, I
didn't even consider the mating thing. I mean what the fuck. I was letting the
two of you be. Then it was too late. And the both of you… you kept me there and
wanted to offer up your virginity as some sort of pity prize."
Almost violently, he shook his
head releasing the strand of hair. "No fucking way. And when I try to do
the right then, the selfless thing, reverse the roles of Luke and me, he goes
off and dies for you. Fucking dies for you in grand fashion. And I'm so fucking
pissed at him. I mean for once couldn't I be the hero. I wasn't like I going to
die in front of you. I was going to disappear and let it happen. He deserved
you. The guy had walking down the aisle on the brain when it came to you. I
could practically see diapers of your future children in his head. So why the
hell did he do it?" He yelled out. His eyes shimmered with unshed tears.
His pain catapulted into me.
He yanked his hand away like I'd
burned him. His eyes might have glowed if he was still half demon in Fairy.
"And the fucked up part is
that a small part of me was happy he was dead."
I gasped. I couldn't help it. I'd
never expect to hear those words from him. He swiped a forearm across his eyes.
"Disgusted? I am too. How
fucked up is that? Some tiny place inside me filled with hope that maybe I'd
get the girl.”
And he was back to referring me
in third person as if removing himself from the situation.
“But she's like vacant. Her eyes
are dull as if all her life went with him. And I can't blame her. He's better
for her than me. So I do the right thing, figuring I can finally be her
champion. If I'll help her find him so they can ride off in the fucking
sunset."
My voice was unsteady and the
word barely a whisper. "Flynn.." I pleaded with him, but he ignored
me.
"And here we are. No need to
explain what happened next. And I don't have to die here Mercy. And I need you
to do something for me."
I reached out a hand, and he
stopped me from connecting with the soft skin of his cheek.
"Let me go." His words
were barely audible, but I heard them loud and clear.
A sob yanked from my throat.
"No."
I stumbled forward, but he shook
his head.
"Morgana," he began.
"I like her Mercy. And I think she likes me. I can't say she'll be the one
because there will never be the one. But who knows. I can get to know her. And
if not her, here I have a shot at finding someone. And maybe way way off in the
future I can have that family and be happy like Dad and your mom. So I need you
to let me go because I'm not fucking strong enough to leave you on my
own."