Fight or Flight (14 page)

Disengage the weapons. There’d be no way to fight back. If the pirates disabled their thrusters, they’d be a sitting duck. She wasn’t ready to make that call yet.

She hit the announcer ’com and spoke.

“Ladies and gentlemen, this is Captain Tirzah Simonian. We are under attack from a Coronal pirate ship. Please stay in your quarters. Food generators are offline for the rest of the voyage. You may notice the temperature dropping on board ship; we’re diverting climate control to the shields. Please do not panic. We’re going to land the ship tonight, probably within the hour. Just in case, dress warmly and hold tight.”

She turned off the ’com, and Campbell steered the ship toward the planet that was the hub of Solomon Territory. The pirates followed, firing across their bow.

“Fuck,” she muttered as the shields showed signs of strain.

“Diverting more power from climate control.” Claudia’s voice crackled through the ’com.

Campbell began some evasive actions, feinting and rolling. The ship didn’t quite have the maneuverability for what he attempted, and it shuddered.

“Commander, take the captain’s chair.” She leaped from her seat and took his place at the helm. Feeling the weight of the ship on her shoulders as well as in the helm controls, she took a deep breath. She ignored the sound of weapons fire shaking the ship and powered the thrusters on one side, spinning the ship before it lurched forward. She needed more power.

“Claudia, take all power from weapons systems and push it to the engines.”

She felt the burst of power, and she grinned. Okay, so the colony ship was still more elephant than hotrod, but it had some go.

“Campbell, call the station and have them ready a defense. I don’t think the pirates would follow us into atmosphere, but it’s best to be prepared.”

His voice was behind her as he complied.

At this speed they were mere minutes away from entering atmosphere. Coronal ships weren’t really designed for planetary landings, but she was sure they were capable of it. She was banking on them pulling off when she entered atmosphere. If they followed her, it could get ugly. There were civilians on the ground, and she was leading a pirate ship straight to them.

“Station is launching a fighter,” Campbell announced. Tirzah nodded her head and pushed one last thrust to take them into atmosphere. The blip on screen was the fighter hurtling into space to take on the Coronal ship, and she muttered a prayer of thanks as she slowed the ship for landing.

The colony station landing pad was ahead, and she steered toward it, setting the ship down with a lurch. Not her softest landing, but all things considered, not so bad. Her heart pounded in her chest, and she took several deep breaths to calm herself as her crew cheered around her.

She stood shakily and gave a tight smile as they hugged and celebrated. She was surprised to see Josiah had joined the crew on the bridge, and was standing back and watching. He came close enough to give her a hug, but then stopped and held out his hand instead.

“Tirzah, girl, if we have to be attacked by pirates on my wedding night, there is no one I’d rather have in charge than you,” he whispered. “You were incredible.”

She nodded, smiling, shaking the offered hand. “Thanks, Becky.”

“Don’t call me Becky in front of the crew.”

“Go home to your husband, Josiah. I’ve got it from here.” She patted his shoulder. He smiled and gave a little wave as he left the bridge.

“Hey, boss?” Claudia’s voice came over the ’com.

“Yeah Clau, I’m here.”

“We’re gonna need some repair crews on the starboard side of the ship, but overall no major damage.”

“Thanks, Clau. You’re getting a promotion and a couple of medals just as soon as I can arrange it.”

“Just doin’ my job, boss.”

“Yeah, but maybe we can call you Chief Wrench Jockey Supreme, Esquire or something.”

“Nah, just a night off would be fabulous.”

“Take it. Go back to bed. Don’t think I didn’t notice you were in pajamas on my bridge.”

“Thanks, Captain.”

Tirzah took a deep breath. They’d made it. She’d landed her ship safely in port, and was one step closer to returning to the life she’d had before Walter. She was one step closer to the elite fight command.

So why was she filled with dread instead of relief?

Chapter 24

“You don’t understand. I can’t stay here. I have to get back to Earth by January,” Tirzah shouted at the administrator of the station, and he just shook his head.

“I’m sorry, Captain Simonian, we don’t have a ship that can get you to Earth that fast.”

“You have two freakin’ fighters! And I know how to fly them!”

“But you haven’t been approved for fight command. I can’t put you in a fighter.”

“And I can’t get approved for fight command unless I get back to Earth!”

“They’ll do the test again in six months, Captain. Stay here for a few weeks, enjoy the holiday festival, and take your time getting back to Earth.”

“Yeah, ’cause Christmas is really my idea of a vacation.” She growled, stomping out of his office. She collapsed against the wall of the hallway, frustration evident in every line of her body. Josiah and Max waited there for her.

“No dice?” Max asked.

She shook her head.

“Well, I suppose we could pray for a Christmas miracle,” he said, patting her shoulder.

“Bah humbug,” Josiah said, winking at Tirzah. She groaned.

“Christmas trapped on a rock instead of in the stars.” Tears threatened, and she took a deep breath, stifling them.

“Sweetie, we’ll figure something out.” Josiah pulled her into a hug. “I think I’ve got a bottle of real tequila in my quarters back on the ship. We could do shots until we come up with a plan.”

“Oh yeah, that sounds like a great idea, Becky.” She rolled her eyes. “I learned my lesson about tequila shots at the Academy, thank you very much.”

“Is there anything I can do?”

“No, thanks though. I’m gonna go see if Brad’s around. Maybe sparring with him will make me feel better. I’ll catch up with you guys later.”

* * * *

Zeke knew he had to say good-bye. She was leaving, their time together was over, and he had a job to do in Solomon City.

She didn’t answer her ’com. Had she already left? Without saying good-bye? He called Josiah. He, at least, would be staying awhile.

“Hello?”

“Josiah, it’s Zeke. I’m looking for Tirzah.”

“Try the gym.”

“She didn’t leave?”

“No. Zeke, I don’t think she’s going to make it back to Earth on time for the test.”

A rush of hope surged through him. Maybe she wouldn’t leave after all?

“So, she’s staying?”

A long pause. He knew the other man well enough by now to know he would never say anything that wasn’t in Tirzah’s interest. Josiah was 100 percent loyal to his best friend.

“I don’t think so. I’m sorry, Zeke, it’s just how she is. Even I can’t get through to her right now.”

“Thanks for telling me where to find her.”

“You’re welcome. Maybe you can convince her to stay awhile.”

“Yeah.” But even as he said it, he knew he wouldn’t try. She’d made her choice, and it wasn’t him. A dull ache throbbed in his chest.

He’d never be enough for a woman who’d had the entire universe at her fingertips. What right did he have to try and hold her back? After all, she’d said it herself: she was born to fly.

* * * *

Back on ship, most of the civilians were gone, but a lot of the crew stayed on board. Tirzah was glad to see Brad working out in the boxing gym. He’d taught her a lot about different hand-to-hand fighting styles, but she was in the mood for some old-school punch-throwing.

“Brad,” she called out as he finished a round with the heavy bag.

“Hey Tirz. How’s it going?”

“I need a workout.”

“Fuck yeah.” He grinned back at her, his enthusiasm infectious. “Grab a rope and warm up.”

Tirzah did as she was told, wrapping her hands before alternating jumping rope and jumping jacks, getting her heart rate up.

“I’m glad you came in,” Brad told her as she put the rope away. “It’s been dead in here since you landed us back on this rock.”

“Sorry about that.”

She started shadow boxing in front of the mirror, working on her form and loosening the muscles. Brad didn’t say anything.

“You sweaty yet?” he asked after her third round. She nodded, reaching for her gloves. “Come here.” He gestured to the heavy bag. “Give me a round of jabs followed by a round of one-two-three.”

Tirzah knew her jabs were a weak point—a holdover from the broken arm and subsequent surgery. Brad knew it too. She bared her teeth at her friend and went to work. At the end of the first round, her left arm burned. Brad held out a water bottle, and she let him squirt some in her mouth. He pointed at the bag and she went back to work.

She let the rhythm of the combination settle into her limbs. Jab, right cross, left hook. It was hypnotic, compelling, freeing.

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

One.

Two.

Three.

She paused, resting her forehead against the bag.

“How’s your arm?” Brad asked. He was always careful to push her limits, but not to push her too hard.

“It fucking hurts, Brad, but it’s the good hurt.”

“Can it take another round of jabs?”

She let the first punch be her answer. As she finished the round he offered the water again.

“Three-two combo. Go.”

Jab, right, left, uppercut, left. Arms aching, she pictured the smarmy administrator and his smug face on the bag. “I can’t put you in a fighter.” Jab, right, left, uppercut, left. “You haven’t been approved for fight command.” Jab, right, left, uppercut, left.

“Enough, Tirzah,” Brad said when she growled as she threw the last left hook. “There’s someone here to see you.”

“Looking good.” The voice behind her was deep and velvety smooth, and only one man could possibly sound that good. Zeke.

“Hi.” She turned and faced him, dripping with sweat, sure her face was red and blotchy.

“Sexy,” he teased, but she wasn’t in a smiling mood. His face sobered quickly. “Listen, I’m not good at good-byes. You know why. But I had to see you, and Josiah told me you were here.”

“Zeke…” She stopped speaking, not sure what she could even say.

“Pixie. Let’s not draw it out. I love you. I know you’re leaving, and I won’t ask you to give up your dream to hang around this rock with me. You deserve every happiness. I’m leaving for Solomon City tonight. I just wanted to wish you well.”

Tears welled in her eyes, but she fought them back. She started to unlace her right glove; he stopped her.

“Don’t shake my hand, pixie.” He shook his head. He leaned in close and she smelled his sandalwood soap. He cupped her cheek with his hand and kissed her. For a moment, it felt more like a hello than a good-bye, and she reached for him, coming up frustrated when her boxing gloves got in the way. When he pulled back, he looked in her eyes and smiled before turning to leave. Panic hit at the idea of him walking away from her.

“Wait,” she whispered, struggling with the laces. Finally she got the gloves off and she reached again, needing to touch him one more time.

“Is this it? Can’t you stay a few more days?”

“What for, Tirzah?” After weeks of being his pixie, his use of her given name was like a slap in the face. He pushed her hands away. “You need someone to warm your bed a few more days before you jet back to Earth?”

Is that what he thought of her? Is that what she wanted? If the tables were turned, would she want to stay, or would she have one foot out the door?

“Zeke, I can’t—”

“Good luck with your test.”

And then he was gone. Tirzah slammed her fist into the heavy bag, wincing as pain shot up her arm.
No gloves.
But the sharp pain of impact in her arm had nothing on the hollow rush in her heart.

No Zeke.

Chapter 25

The alarms sounded throughout the colony station that meant a new ship was coming in. It was December twentieth, and Tirzah had given up hope of getting back to Earth in time for the test. Zeke had left, and she was alone again, so she did what any stranded pilot would do: she sulked in the station bar. Claudia was on hand to make sure she didn’t drink “too much,” but she didn’t really have any intention of stopping when her friend said so.

Gone.
The hollowness in the pit of her stomach was eating at her. He was gone, and she was stranded. She’d let him walk away, and for nothing. She’d missed her chance to get her wings back, and it all felt so damned empty.

“What’s coming in? Another cargo ship? Another boatload of civilians arriving just in time to believe in miracles?” She huffed as she took a swig of her synthetic beer.

“Looks like fighters, actually.” Claudia pointed. One by one, five birds touched down on the pad outside. Tirzah seethed with jealousy as the pilots and their three-person crews disembarked, clapping each other on the backs and laughing.

“Fuck them.” Tirzah sighed, and then waved to the bartender for another beer.

“This is your last beer, boss. I will throw you over my shoulder and drag your ass back to captain’s quarters if I have to.”

“You know what really sucks, Claudia? If I go to him now, he’s going to think I settled. He’d never believe I chose him.”

“Do you really feel like being with him would be settling?”

“No, but he would be settling if he took me back. Half a woman. I can’t be what he needs until I’m whole again.”

“Look.” Claudia pointed at the door. Still in their flight suits, the fight crews entered the bar, cheering and joking with each other. They didn’t notice Claudia and Tirzah.
Thankfully
, thought Tirzah as she glared at them from behind her beer. They’d apparently just dealt an ass-whipping to the pirate ship she’d run from the week before. It should have been her ass-whipping to deal out.

“Good for them.” Claudia smiled.

“Rah.” Tirzah frowned.

“Okay, I’m really getting tired of you sitting around feeling sorry for yourself.” Claudia grabbed Tirzah by both shoulders. “Get a fucking grip. It’s six months. That’s it. You have been waiting over a year, what’s six more months?”