Divided (14 page)

Before bed I called him to say goodnight. The phone rang twice before he answered. “My bed is too big and I can barely smell you. Come back?” Ryan said into the phone, his voice raspy driving me insane.

I hesitated for a second. “Nope, we both have a busy day tomorrow.” Though the only thing I wanted to do was get in my car and drive over to his house. Sleeping in the same bed with him had been absolutely incredible.

“Stay on the phone with me until I fall asleep?” He asked. Bringing the down comforter up to my chest, I hugged it tightly. The tingles I felt in my heart made me all giddy.

“Of course. Goodnight, Ryan.” I said, closing my eyes with a huge smile on my face.  “Goodnight my sweet, Bug.” It was the last thing he said to me. 

⌘

During my morning jog I passed the Art Museum. Not knowing much about the event I made a point to pull out my laptop when I got back to my room. Googling
Trent Kraft Special Needs Foundation
I was shocked by what I found. There were multiple articles about Trent and the Kraft Family. One in particular caught my eye though.
Ryan Kraft declines pro hockey offer after brother’s fatal car accident.
I opened the link to the article and read further.

On May 14, 2006, Ryan James Kraft 22, publically declined an offer to play professional hockey for the Chicago Blackhawks stating that with recent events, involving the death of his younger brother, he has chosen to remain in Grand Forks, North Dakota in an effort to stay close to his family. The accident that took his brothers life, occurred on May 3, 2006 the same night Ryan Kraft was scheduled to graduate from the College of North Dakota. Mrs. Kraft who was also in the accident, suffered severe head trauma and was hospitalized for two weeks. Kraft’s younger brother, Trent, suffered from Down Syndrome. A source says that the bothers were inseparable, that Kraft created a special league hockey team, his junior year of high school, when his brother was not allowed to play because of his condition.  A source from the College stated that Ryan has accepted a position as head coach for The College of North Dakota and plans on expanding the special needs hockey team in memory of his brother.

I sat back and looked at the picture of Ryan and Trent that was attached to the site. Ryan was from a different breed than the rest of the world. He was given his dream, to play professional hockey, and declined it. All to be near his family. He started a special needs hockey team because his brother couldn’t play.
He has a heart of gold
. Without realizing that I was crying, I felt a wet tear hit my chest.

Wiping my tears away, I gathered myself and began my prep work for tonight. While applying my makeup I looked at my phone as it lit up on the counter with a new incoming text message from Ryan.

Ryan: I cannot wait to see you. ;)

I smiled and placed it back on the counter.  His words had my heart racing at the possibilities of what could happen between us, what I
wanted
to happen.

I was dressed and ready by 7:00 PM. My phone vibrated with an incoming call from Ryan and after three deep breaths to clam my nerves, I answered, “Hello?”

“Hi, I’m downstairs. Do you mind if I come up?” I closed my eyes when I heard his voice.

Looking at myself in the mirror, smiling ear to ear, I answered. “No come on up, I’m dressed already. I’m just doing some final touches.”

“Ok. I’ll be right up.” He said.

I ran to the bathroom and pulled all of the rollers out of my hair. I sprayed my hair with hairspray one last time and shook my head so it fell perfectly over my shoulders. By the time I had my shoes on, I heard a knock on the door. When I opened the door, Ryan was standing in front of me with a tailored tuxedo. He had on a black tie and a royal blue handkerchief, the perfect shade of blue to match my dress.

“Alani, you look…” My skin prickled with an electric shock. “Stunning.” His eyes traveled up and down my body. I reveled in his admiration and opened the door wider to let him in.

“You don’t look so bad yourself.” I said nonchalantly, but Ryan looked panty dropping delicious. His dark charcoal suit fit perfectly on his body. “Come on in, I just need five minutes.”

“No need to rush, we’re early.” He placed a kiss on my cheek before walking to the couch.

Walking in the bathroom I sprayed a bit of perfume on my wrists, behind my ears, and in between my breasts.   “Ok, I’m all ready.”

Ryan stood up as I moved towards the door. We both entered the empty elevator and as the doors closed, Ryan turned towards me and moved in closer. I moved backwards until my back was up against the wall. Though I was wearing three-inch heels he was still taller than I was and I had to look up at him to see his eyes. Eyes that were currently staring down at my lips, breast, and then back up to my eyes. I felt his growing erection push against my stomach and bit my lower lip, while I held my breath and closed my eyes, waiting in anticipation. Rubbing his nose up my cheek, he inhaled deep; I felt his forehead line up with mine. “Mmm.” He groaned.

My heart was pounding, with each passing second. I had wanted those lips on mine for so long. He exhaled out of his nose and I could feel it. He was only centimeters away. Hating this back and forth between us, I decided to take matters into my own hands.

But when the doors opened suddenly, we both realized what it was that we were doing.
Fuck.
Ryan cleared his throat and ushered me out of the elevator. “Fucking elevators.” He mumbled, wrapping his hand with mine as we walked out to his car.  My heart pounding and my core throbbing, I didn’t even feel the cool air on my skin.

The Museum of Art had been transformed to hold the event with over 600 people in attendance. Ryan and his family had really outdone themselves, transforming an art museum into a reception hall. There were long drapes that dropped from the ceiling to the ground. They had closed part of the museum off to separate cocktail hour and the dining room. There were candles and flower arrangements all over the place and it was absolutely beautiful.

I held tightly to Ryan’s hand after we checked our coats in. He led me through the room until he reached what I could see where his family stood.  His mother was a petite woman with blonde hair and soft green eyes. Her face brightened when she saw Ryan and me approaching. His father looked just like him, but an older version. Same height, but not as athletic as Ryan, and his sister had pin straight blonde hair. She was about my height, and looked just like her mother but had the same smile that Ryan had.  She tugged on the arm of the man she was with; whom I could only assume was her husband.

“Ryan my dear, you look so handsome.” His mother said to him as we approached. “And you must be Alani?” She said with a warm smile. I nodded and reached out my hand for hers. “It is a pleasure to meet you Mrs. Kraft.” She looked at my hand and wrapped her arms around me instead.  “Please call me Rosemary.” With her arms wrapped tightly around me, I smirked at how much she reminded me of Ryan.

“Alani, this is my father Robert, my sister Jessica and my brother-in law Scott.”

Mr. Kraft shook my hand. “Pleasure to meet you, young lady.” I thanked him and greeted his sister Jessica who gave me a big hug.

“I have heard so much about you.”

“All good, I hope.” She gave me a quick smile and nodded. “Only good stuff, he can’t stop talking about you.” I happily pouted at Ryan as he shook his head and ruffled his sister’s hair. ‘Hey!” She chided and we as laughed at the display of sibling affection. Leaning forward, I shook Scott’s hand while introducing myself before Ryan had a chance and then we made our way through the crowd of people.

I saw some familiar faces, kids that were at the rink a couple of days ago. Ryan high-fived each one of them as we pass by. They all looked handsome in their penguin type tuxedos and each person that Ryan stopped to talk to, he made it a point to introduce me, never letting go my hand. Everyone was here for a good cause, and to imagine that this was all Ryan’s idea was astonishing. I was truly blessed to have met such a genuine person with such a big heart.

Cocktail hour ended and we were all ushered into the main room. There was a dance floor and a band. Something I wouldn’t have expected, but I went with it. When we reached our table, I met additional family members of Ryan; and the conversation ran freely between Ryan’s family and myself.

After our salads, the band began to play soft jazz music. Ryan grabbed my hand, “Dance with me, Bug.” He asked and excusing myself from the table, we made our way to the dance floor as other couples began doing the same. Ryan placed my hand in his and his other hand rested on the lower part of my back before he guided me across the dance floor.

“You know, I can’t stop thinking about the elevator.” He said softly into my ear. My heart instantly started to pump blood through my body; my head was resting on the side of his chin. I didn’t say anything I just continued to dance as he went on. “I have wanted to kiss you for so long now. I can’t stop thinking about your lips, how they’ll taste, how they would feel against mine.” I closed my eyes and tried to focus on the music. “You see what the problem is though, is that I want to be your last first kiss. I want to make sure that the first kiss we share is mesmerizing; that you never want to kiss another person after me. You go back home tomorrow and I’ll never know if you’ll share a kiss with someone else. I have pictured kissing you since the night I met you. I have wanted to bury my soul into those plump lips.” I kissed his cheek, because I didn’t know what to say to him. Ryan held me tightly in his arms, not wanting to move from that spot I wrapped my arms around his neck bringing him down to me. After he placed a kiss on my forehead, I laid my head on his chest listening to his heartbeat, hoping that it was beating for me. We stayed locked in each other’s arms until the band asked us all to sit as dinner was being served.

       During dinner I calmed my nerves with wine as Rosemary shared amazing stories about Ryan and Trent growing up. Jessica asked me about shopping in New York, and the whole time we were sitting, Ryan found ways to touch me, whether by a small tap with his legs or reaching his arms around my chair.

Placing his hand on mine he leaned over and whispered. “Will you help me with something, Bug?” Nodding, I followed him to the stage.

“Good evening, everyone,” He spoke.  “Thank you all again for attending our annual awards dinner. As most of you know, this foundation is very dear to my family and me. We thank you all again for supporting and bringing awareness to children with special needs.”

“Now on to the main event, and please hold all your applause until all of the kids are called up.” Ryan began to call each child who was provided with a participating trophy along with a lump sum amount to be put towards either his or her medical bills or their future college tuition.

After every child was on stage, a roar of applause erupted. I clapped as a tear rolled down my cheek. As I wiped it away, Ryan looked my way, concern spreading across his face. Shaking my head at him, I sent him a reassuring smile. He reached for my hand and brought it to his lips and then brought the microphone back to his mouth.

“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you again. Now let’s enjoy our evening with dessert and music.” He handed the microphone to the lead singer and brought me directly to the dance floor. “What is it, Bug?”

I shook my head. “It’s nothing, you’re just such an incredible person. I just feel honored to have met you.” Ryan pulled me closer and kissed my forehead.

“May I have this dance?” I heard from behind as I felt a hand placed on my shoulder. I turned to see Michael and was a bit surprised to see that he was directing the question to Ryan and not me. Ryan nodded his consent and his mother Rosemary stepped in to dance with him while I took Michael’s hand.

“So Ms. Yankee, how are you liking the Midwest?” I placed my hand on Michaels shoulder; meeting his eyes, I couldn’t control the satisfied smile.

“It’s been a great trip.” I said, looking up into Michael’s big blue eyes and remembering the past two weeks.

I watched his face change from cheerful to serious. “Hey listen about the other night, I’m sorry. I completely forgot that she was with us.”

I shook my head to stop him from the unnecessary apology. “It really is ok, Ryan and I are just friends.”

“Pfft… Friends, friends my ass. There’s no way that Ryan looks at his friends the way he looks at you. There’s no way he would scour every possible place looking for someone who was just a friend.”

I didn’t know what to say and was grateful when it seemed like Michael sensed that I want to know more. “I have known Ryan since we were kids and though he hasn’t said it outright to anyone, we all know that he’s head over heels in love with you. He changed his life after Las Vegas.”

“What do you mean changed his life after Vegas?” I questioned looking up at Michael searching in his eyes for answers.

“Not my story to tell, Alani. I’ve known him since I was kid, and that man loves you.”

I stopped dancing and looked back at Ryan as he stepped side to side with his mother occasionally twirling her.
Love?
I looked back at Michael “I don’t want someone to sweep me off my feet if he isn’t going to be there to catch me when I fall. We live two different lives.” Fear of losing Ryan crawled into my heart.

“I don’t know you, Alani, but I do know love when I see it. You can deny it all you want but you love him just as much as he loves you. Neither one of you may want to admit it, but anyone standing in the same room with you two can
feel
it.”

Shaking the stunned expression from my face, I saw that Ryan was moving closer so I cut Michael off. “When did you get so smart, Michael?”

“Michael smart?” Ryan chimed in. “Are you trying to sweet talk my date?” Michael and I both stopped moving.

“Nope. Not at all bro.” He pulled my hand to his lips. “Thank you for the dance and have a safe trip home.” He said. I wrapped my arms around him, and hugged him tightly.