Deeper (9 page)

I
laughed. “You
think
you’re ready?”

He
chuckled and said, “I’m not good at this, am I?”

“You’re
better than you think,” I replied, winking at him.

“So,
what exactly are you saying? Do you want us to be a…
couple
or
something?”

Kris’s
mouth curved into a half smile.

“I
guess that’s what I’m saying.”

I
blinked at him.

“You’re
not really saying anything.”

He
ran a hand through his messy wet hair and pulled at it frustratingly.

“All
I know is that I want you, Jess. Everything is falling into place and it just
feels right.”

I
smiled brightly at him.

“It
really does. I can’t believe this is actually happening to me right now. This
is everything I’ve ever wanted since I was five years old.”

“I
can’t believe you felt that way for so long and never said anything.”

My
pulse began to race as he moved closer to me. I had been so comfortable with
him that I hadn’t even realized that he wasn’t wearing a towel.

“I’ve
always thought you were beautiful, Jess.”

I
swallowed hard and toyed with the bottom of my towel, sliding it slightly to
the side so my leg was exposed.

“Then
why didn’t you ever make a move until now?”

“Because
you’re…well,
you
. You’re so sweet and perfect and…fuck, I don’t know,”
he said, and I reached up and wrapped my arm around his neck. “I feel like you
could do so much better than me but I also know that if any other man ever
touches you I’ll fucking lose my mind.”

“No
one will ever get the chance to,” I whispered seductively, my lips only inches
from his. “I’m yours, Kris, and I always will be.”

Before
I could stop myself, I let go of him and untied my towel, letting it fall
around me. I was bare and exposed next to a gloriously naked Kris. He groaned with
satisfaction.

“You’re
trying to kill me, aren’t you?”

He
tried to scoot away from me, but I snaked my arm around his neck again and
pulled him closer to me.

“Please
don’t pull away,” I begged. “I promise I feel okay. I was a little sore when I
woke up but I’m not anymore. I’m not going to be able to last until the next
time.”

Kris
gently ran a thumb over my nipple, which pebbled at his touch. “I’ve created a
monster, haven’t I?”

I
huffed out a laugh. “You didn’t create a monster. You’ve unleashed one.”

Talk
time was over at that point when I pulled his face to mine and kissed him hard.
In one swift movement, I moved off the bed and straddled his bare lap.

We
both moaned as I ground into his erection, which was already hot, hard, and
ready. I shivered at the feel of being skin to skin with him. Every part of him
felt amazing.

I
combed my fingers through his hair at the nape of his neck and murmured against
his lips, “I want you Kris. Now.”

His
big, warm hands rested at the small of my back and pulled my body closer into
his.

“You
promise to tell me if you are hurting in any way?” he asked huskily.

“I
promise,” whispering. I lifted my hips until my entrance was just above his
throbbing erection and slowly began to lower myself down onto him.

My
eyes went wide and I gasped sharply; not from pain (even though I was still a
tiny bit tender) but from sheer pleasure. As I slowly took him in inch by glorious
inch, I looked at his handsome face and my heart started beating faster.

His
eyes were half closed and his jaw was tight as he gritted his teeth. “Holy
fuck!” he hissed out before covering my mouth with his. He moaned loudly and
his fingers dug into my hips as he tried to keep from losing control. “Oh my
God, you feel so good.”

“Kris,”
I panted, and I continued lowering myself onto him until he was all the way
inside me. My body was alive with sensation and I gripped his shoulders from
the intense feeling of him being so deep inside me. I could never have imagined
that being with him would feel this good.

Even
though I was new to sex, I knew what to do from walking in on Crystal with her
many men over the years so I instinctively started to move. Kris growled and
began kissing and sucking my neck. I continued to rock my hips back and forth
and he gripped me tight as we slowly and gently made love again.

It
wasn’t long before I felt myself racing toward an orgasm…my fourth one from
Kris (not that I was keeping count). I kept up my pace, wanting desperately to
feel that sweet release again. Moaning and whimpering, I said, “It’s coming, I
can’t hold on.”

His
green eyes snapped open and locked with mine. In that moment, with him deep
inside me and looking at me like I was the only girl in the world, I felt intense
pleasure as my building orgasm finally hit me.

“Fuck,
I’m coming!” he growled through his teeth. His body went rigid as he emptied
inside me…I could feel him letting go deep within me and it was incredibly
intense.

As
we came down from our post-sex highs, Kris lay back on the bed and took me with
him, still holding me in his arms. He pulled out of me and I winced at the
strange feeling. “Are you okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” he asked.

“No,
I’m totally fine. I feel wonderful,” I replied, trying to catch my breath.

He
smiled at me and kissed my forehead. He was about to say something but before
he did, his eyes went wide. “Oh fuck,” he said loudly.

“What
is it?” I asked, leaning up and looking down at him.

He
sat back up and ran a hand through his hair. “I forgot to wear a condom.” He
was breathing like he’d ran a marathon but I was sure that it wasn’t from the
mind-blowing sex we just had.

I
ran a hand over his strong back and said, “Kris, don’t freak. I know my cycle
and I think we’re okay.”

“You
think so?”

I
leaned in and kissed his shoulder.

“I
know so. I don’t know how much you want to know about my girl stuff, but I am
supposed to start my period in two days and I’ve never been late. If we had
unprotected sex two weeks ago, I’d be worried, but this isn’t anything to worry
about.”

“Good,”
he replied, breathing a sigh of relief. “I just…I don’t think a baby is
something either of us can handle right now.”

“You’re
right about that,” I agreed. “Your band is on the brink of hitting the big time
and I am close to getting my own place. We are on the verge of getting
everything we’ve ever wanted and neither of us need something like this. We’re
safe, I promise.”

“Thank
God,” he said, exhaling in relief, and he leaned in and kissed my lips.

“Well,
now that’s settled,” he said, grinning, “we should probably get dressed and
head home.”

I
frowned.

“Why?
Don’t you want to be with me today?”

“I
want to be with you all day,” he said, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
“It’s just that check out is in thirty minutes and I only paid for one night.”

“Oh
right,” I smiled, but inside I was sad to see our time alone together end.

Last
night and this morning had been so incredible for me and I wasn’t ready to say
goodbye to it yet. As soon as we left the hotel, our little safe haven from the
rest of the world, we’d be going back to reality and I wasn’t ready yet. I
hadn’t been this happy in my whole life and knowing I’d be going home to
Crystal’s insults had me on the verge of tears.

Even
though Kris just told me he wanted us to be a couple and try to work on a
relationship, I was still so scared that when we went back home to our lives he
would realize he’d made a mistake with me and not want me anymore. I would be
devastated and heartbroken if he changed his mind…

Kris
caressed my cheek. “Hey,” he said, “don’t be sad.”

Swallowing
the quick-forming lump in my throat, I answered, “I’m not sad. This has been
the best birthday of my entire life.”

Kris
smiled at me, his jade-green eyes crinkling at the corners.

“Jess,
I know you better than anyone. I know you’re either afraid that when we leave
here I’ll change my mind about us, or you’re afraid to go home to that fucking
bitch Crystal.”

Before
I could reply, he continued. Grabbing my face, he said, “You don’t have to be
afraid of either one of those scenarios. I will make sure Crystal doesn’t touch
you when you go home, and I guarantee my feelings about you aren’t going to
change, ever.”

“They
won’t?” I asked, my eyes wide at his words.

“Of
course not. I know this is new and no one knows what will come of it, but I
promise you here and now that I have never, ever felt this way about anybody.
Jess, being with you last night and just now…sex has never felt that fucking
amazing for me. I haven’t begun to get my fill of you,” he said, leaning in and
kissing my lips.

Tingles
shot through me as I let his words sink in and I felt hope for the first time
in forever. I gave into his kiss and held him close to me, happy in the
knowledge that this kiss would be the first of many kisses I shared with Kris.

I
was so happy…I just hoped with all of my heart that this was the beginning of
things finally going good in my life and not something that I would eventually
lose.

Kris

Three
Weeks Later

I
looked at the clock on the wall of the warehouse and sighed. The last ten
minutes of my shift were always the longest, especially these past three weeks.
Knowing that I was clocking out and heading home to see Jessie made the minutes
feel like hours.

The
past three weeks with her had been some of the best of my life. We’d been
friends for such a long time and I was used to seeing her every day, but now
that we’d taken that step toward a relationship, being with her was ten times
better.

I
adored everything about her…her huge, blue eyes that were as deep as an ocean,
her full pouty lips that tasted as sweet as candy, her long silky brown hair
that smelled like the sweetest flowers in the world, her soft, sexy body…

Fuck!
Just the thought of her was giving me a boner. I looked up at the time
again…two more minutes. This was killing me. I couldn’t wait to get the hell
out of here, meet Jessie at my apartment (which had become our routine so we
could be together without either of our parents interrupting), and spend the
afternoon buried inside her and making her scream my name.

As
I put away the last of a pallet full of cereal, the timer on my watch beeped.
It was finally time to get the fuck out of here. I quickly took off my apron
and barely muttered a goodbye to my manager before I grabbed my keys from my
locker and took off out the back door. I ran to my truck and jumped inside,
quickly starting it and speeding out of the parking lot and into traffic.

I
was at the apartment building in ten minutes and I quickly parked my truck and
jumped out. I ran inside and took the steps two at a time until I was standing
at Jessie’s front door. I banged three times and breathlessly waited for her to
answer the door.

I
heard her sliding the chain off the door and unlocking several locks. After the
most agonizing three seconds of my life, the door opened and there stood a
smiling Jessie, looking sinfully sexy in a pair of cut off jean shorts and a
black tank top. Ever since we’d gotten together she’d been wearing shorts and
skirts more often because I mentioned that I loved looking at her killer legs.
It just made me want her more to stare at them, knowing those long, toned legs
would either be wrapped around my waist or have my head buried between them
soon.

“Hi,”
she said brightly. Her face was flushed and she had a slight pink color to her
cheeks.

I
stepped to her and immediately picked her up into my arms and twirled her
around. I pulled her mouth to mine for a quick kiss. “Hi back.”

She
carelessly pulled the door closed and I carried her down the hall to my
apartment. Once we were inside, I walked us to my room and closed the door
behind me.

We
didn’t talk at all as we began to undress each other, throwing shirts, pants,
and underwear all over my room. It wasn’t long before I had Jessie on her back
and I was buried inside what was quickly becoming my favorite place on earth.

Jessie
felt amazing; she was warm, inviting, familiar…being inside her was heaven. As
I slowly drove her to the brink of ecstasy, I opened my eyes and watched her.

She
was breathing heavily and her eyes were closed, but her lashes were fluttering
against her cheeks. Her warm brown silken hair was splayed out around her head
on the pillow in chestnut waves and her cheeks were a beautiful, flustered
shade of pink. Jessie was absolutely the most breathtakingly beautiful girl I’d
ever known.

When
we were both finished, I collapsed on top of her in a boneless heap before
rolling off of her. “Oh wow,” she stated breathlessly. “That was amazing.”

“Yes
it was,” I replied, panting like I’d just run a mile.

“I
can’t imagine sex being better than this. I mean, I have absolutely nothing to
compare it to, but still…”

I
chuckled. “Well, I can compare sex and let me just tell you, Jess, you are
fucking spectacular,” I answered, laughing.

She
was silent for a moment and I looked over at her. She had her arms crossed,
covering her chest, and her plush lips were formed into a pout. She was so
fucking adorable.

“What’s
wrong?” I asked.

“Oh
nothing. I just love hearing you compare me to all the girls you’ve slept with
in the past. Glad I came out on top of the list,” she grumbled.

I
smiled widely at her and pulled her into my arms. She tried to fight me but as
soon as I began kissing her neck, she caved and gave into me. I would have to
always remember to kiss her neck if we ever fought because the second my lips
were on her there, she would melt.

“Come
on, don’t be like that. You know you’re it for me now, Jess,” I said, tickling
her sides.

I
knew that I had some extremely intense feelings for Jessie, but whenever the
moment would present itself for me to tell her I loved her, I would always fall
short and stop before I said it. I was pretty sure I loved her, but I had no
idea why I couldn’t say it to her.

Jessie
tried to fight me off, but in the end I overpowered her and relentlessly
tickled every part of her my hands could touch. She was begging me to stop
tickling her when we heard loud banging coming from the living room.

“Dude!”
I heard someone shout. “Open the fucking door!”

Jessie’s
eyes widened and she jumped out of my bed and immediately began to get dressed.
I pulled on a pair of sweats and a tee shirt and ran to answer the door.

“What
the hell is going on?” I asked, opening the front door to find Ryder, Jude, and
Beau waiting impatiently in the hall.

Jude
walked inside the apartment and wrapped an arm around my shoulder, shaking me
hard. “What’s going on is that Cory Brewer just called Ryder and they want Bad
Blooded Rebel to open for Sticks and Stones for the next three fucking months!”

“Are
you serious?” I said, running a hand through my messy “just fucked” hair.

Just
then Jess came out into the living room and walked up to me, her brows
furrowed. My cock jumped as I looked at her wearing her cut off shorts and one
of my tee shirts with her hair all mussed and crazy. Lord this girl was
gorgeous. “Hey guys, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s
wrong, Jess. In fact, everything is fucking perfect!” Jude exclaimed.

I
told Jessie the news I had just gotten and she shrieked and her eyes sparkled.
“Oh my God, are you serious?”

“Hell
yes! We head to Pennsylvania tomorrow to meet up with the tour!” Beau stated.

“We
did it, man, we fucking did it!” Ryder shouted out, pulling me into a
back-pounding hug.

We
all high fived and celebrated our good news. Shortly after I broke from hugging
the guys, I picked Jessie up into my arms and swung her around the room.

Suddenly,
a thought hit me like a ton of bricks; not only was I leaving this town
tomorrow, but I was leaving Jessie too. The thought made my chest ache…I didn’t
want to leave her behind but there was no way that I could bring her with me.
The happiest day of my life was also going to be one of the hardest. I was
about to go out and live my dream, but I might lose the only girl I’ve ever
cared for.

“You
made it,” she whispered into my ear. “I’m so proud of you.”

I
set her on her feet and looked into her big blue eyes. There was nothing but
sheer happiness shining out of them and that made me feel even worse. There was
no fear that she would be all alone here without me to keep Crystal off her
back. She was truly happy for me and wasn’t thinking of herself at all.

“Thank
you,” I whispered, my voice thick with emotion.

After
all this time, the guys and I had finally gotten our break as a band, but I’d
also finally found a girl I could see myself getting serious with. I knew being
apart would kill us both but I also knew Jessie so well. There was no way in
hell she would let me pass on this chance just to stay with her.

“Hey,
what is it?” she asked me. “You just got the best news ever! Why do you look
like your dog just died?”

I
couldn’t let her see my doubt, so put away my nerves about our inevitable
goodbye and decided to have a great night with my friends and my girl without
bringing everyone down.

“I’m
great, Jess. I’m just…I can’t believe this actually happened. You said it
would.”

“Because
I have always had faith in my boys. You all deserve this so much and I am so
freaking excited for you!” she squealed happily.

Jude
came over to us and scooped Jessie up into a big hug.

“We
need to celebrate!” he said after releasing her.

“Let’s
go out and do shit we will regret in the morning,” Beau suggested, smiling.

“You
think you’re up to partying with us tonight, Jess, or are you planning on
spending the whole night with your hand down Kris’ pants?” Jude asked.

Jessie
rolled her eyes and ran her fingers through her long hair.

“Shut
up. I definitely want to hang with you guys. Tonight will be the last time I
see my boys for God knows how long,” she answered, her voice quivering on the
last word. She shook her head and she grinned widely. “Okay, no time to get
emotional. This is a celebration! Let me just get my shoes and change my shirt
and I’ll be ready to go,” she said, barely giving us time to answer before she
ran back into my room.

Before
I could read into anything, Beau nudged my arm. “You all right, bro?”

Smiling,
I said, “Yeah, I’m great.”

“You
sure? This is
huge
, man, but I know it’s going to be hard to leave
Jessie behind for a bit,” Ryder said.

“Especially
for you, ya know, since you’ve been fucking her almost every day for the last
few weeks,” Jude chuckled.

I
furrowed my brows and warned, “Don’t talk about her like that.”

Jude
raised his hands in surrender. “I’m just saying.”

“Well,
don’t
just say
anything about her like that. We haven’t just been
fucking. It’s…more than that. It’s Jess,
my
Jess. I just, ugh, I don’t
know. This break is so big for us and we worked our asses off for it, but…”

“But
nothing, Kris,” Beau said, putting his hands on my shoulders. “You’re right.
We’ve killed ourselves every day for years to get our band noticed and it’s
finally happened. Jessie has been our biggest supporter and is a close friend
to all of us and there’s no way in the fucking world she’d ever let you turn
this break down for her.”

I
hung my head. “I know.”

“Look,
pull your shit together before she comes back, okay? Just because we need to
leave tomorrow, it’s not forever. We all love Jess and won’t let her stay here
without us for long,” Ryder said.

“You’re
right,” I nodded as he clapped me on the back. “It’s only three months, right?”

“That’s
the spirit,” Ryder answered.

At
that moment, Jessie came back out into the living room, pulling her long hair
into a ponytail. She’d changed back into her black tank top and looked so sexy
that it was taking all my strength not to just tell the guys I’d see them in
the morning and celebrate with Jessie in my own way. But, I knew this night was
important for all of us and the guys loved her almost as much as I did, so we
needed to spend this last night with the whole band and the one girl that
believed in us from the beginning.

“Are
we ready?” she asked excitedly.

“Let’s
do this shit!” Jude yelled, throwing his arms in the air. We all cheered and
quickly left my apartment to party the night away.

Three
hours later, we’d partied as hard as we could, considering that we were all
still under twenty-one. Ryder got his flirt on with the girl working the liquor
counter at the liquor store that was notorious for not checking ID’s and scored
us two cases of beer, two bottles of vodka, and a case of some fruity shit for
Jessie. She wasn’t a big drinker so we made sure she had something a little
less hard to drink.

By
this time in the evening, we were all pretty buzzed and feeling good. We were
hanging out a local party spot on the river around a big bonfire and it was
packed out with college kids looking to party. Jude had wasted no time in
finding a girl to celebrate with. The last time I’d seen him he was leaning
against a tree and the girl was on her knees in front of him.

Beau
and Ryder had each found girls to occupy their time as well so I had Jessie all
to myself. We were sitting on a log in front of the fire and she was drinking
one of her fruity drinks while I was nursing my fourth beer. She looked so
beautiful in the glow of the fire…it was making it so much harder for me
knowing I’d have to leave her in the morning.

“So,
when do you guys leave tomorrow?” she asked me.