Confrontation (June Hunt Hope for the Heart) (2 page)

The same can be said of God’s anointed people. There are many examples in Scripture of God using His people to confront ungodliness through a variety of methods in both the Old and the New Testaments. Each method, whether direct or indirect, is used with the loving intent of confronting what is wrong and establishing what is right so that we will become all He created us to be. Such confrontations require a response.

“My son, do not despise the L
ORD’S
discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the L
ORD
disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.” (Proverbs 3:11–12)

Have you witnessed the wisdom of those who ask many questions of others though they already know the answers? These intuitive individuals have discovered a powerful secret: Asking wise questions helps others gain insight into truth through inner reflection. In the Bible, Job begins reflecting on his wrong thinking,
knowing
that God will confront him.

“What will I do when God confronts me? What will I answer when called to account?” (Job 31:14)

• The purpose of wise questioning
  is to get people to think seriously about their attitudes and actions, to rethink their thoughts and reconsider their conclusions, to acknowledge their actions and examine their intentions. This method of confrontation is less about a question to evoke an answer and more about a challenge to evoke a change.
  
• The power of wise questioning
  is used by the Lord God Almighty.
  

  In all literature, the most dramatic example of wise questioning is found in the book of Job. Job begins to doubt God’s goodness. In turn, God begins His inquisition of Job with this question,
  “Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge? Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me”
  (Job 38:2–3).
  

  • Pertinent questions can be powerful. Through one question after another—literally 72 questions—God reveals His very nature to Job.
    
  • Pertinent questions can be convicting. After hearing God’s questions, Job is so deeply moved with conviction that he says,
    “I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes”
    (Job 42:6).
    
• The skill of wise questioning
  is used by wise counselors.
  

  If you are one who understands and uses this technique, you have learned an essential counseling skill. God, our ultimate Counselor, demonstrates throughout Scripture that questions effectively draw others out to think about themselves and to think for themselves.
  

  Some questions that appeal to the conscience are:
  

  • “Do you want to live your life with true contentment?”
    
  • “Do you want to be a person of total integrity?”
    
  • “Do you want to fulfill God’s purpose for your life?”
    
  • “Do you want to have God’s blessing on your life?”
    

  “The purposes of a man’s heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out.”
  (Proverbs 20:5)
  

Parables have long been recognized as food for thought and refreshing nourishment for the soul. Simple parables appeal to people of all ages—young and old alike. No wonder these memorable allegories have passed the test of time to remain classic lessons through the centuries.

• A
  parable
  is a short, fictitious illustration—a parable in Scripture is an earthly story with a heavenly meaning—focusing on one moral or spiritual truth.
  
• The Greek word
  parabole
  means comparison or illustration.
  3
  The parable, when used in Scripture, illustrates a moral or spiritual truth by using simple, everyday objects and settings.
  
• A parable shines a probing light on the darkness within our hearts and challenges us to change. Parables can have unending value in developing godly character in our lives.
  

A parable of a vineyard owner was used by Jesus to expose the dark motives within the hearts of Jewish leaders—the Scribes and Pharisees (Luke 20:9–19).

The owner of a vineyard rents out his land. At harvest time, the owner sends one servant after another to obtain some of the fruit; however, the tenants treat each servant shamefully. When the owner sends his beloved son, the tenants plot and kill him. Then Jesus said,
“What then will the owner of the vineyard do to them? He will come and kill those tenants and give the vineyard to others”
(Luke 20:15–16).

In telling this parable, Jesus established the truth—He knew the Scribes and Pharisees would plot to kill him. The tenants in the parable represent the Jewish leaders; the owner’s servants represent the prophets of God whom Israel had murdered throughout the ages; and the owner’s son represents Jesus.

In using this parable, Jesus confronted the Jewish leaders’ abuse of the oversight God had entrusted to them. Rather than allowing the truth within the parable to convict them and seeing it as an opportunity to correct their wrong ways, they sought to kill Jesus.

“The teachers of the law and the chief priests looked for a way to arrest him immediately, because they knew he had spoken this parable against them. But they were afraid of the people.”
(Luke 20:19)

A story, if told well, has the power to move our emotions to anger or move our hearts to tears. Everyone responds to a well-told, true-to-life story. When people are blind to the truth of their own sin, telling them a story parallel to their own sin can be powerfully convicting.

The true story of David’s adulterous affair is recorded in the Bible. David, in his amorous pursuit of Bathsheba, impregnated her and then murdered her husband and married her to cover up his sinful actions. Because of David’s position as king, he escaped the legal consequences of his crimes—the consequences he would have brought on his subjects if they had committed such acts.

• A true-to-life story can have a spiritual purpose.
  The Lord sent Nathan to confront David through a skillfully told story about two men. One was rich, and the other was poor. The rich man had many flocks of sheep, but the poor man had only one beloved pet lamb. When preparing a meal for a traveler, the rich man refused to pick a sheep from his own large flock and instead took the poor man’s little lamb to serve to his guest. After Nathan told this story, David passed the most severe judgment on this rich man.
  

  “David burned with anger against the man and said to Nathan, ‘As surely as the L
  ORD
  lives, the man who did this deserves to die!’”
  (2 Samuel 12:5)
  

• A true-to-life story can be powerful.
  David’s instant judgment against the rich man was absolutely justified. So what could he say when Nathan turned the tables on him saying,
  “You are the man!”
  (2 Samuel 12:7)?
  
• A true-to-life story can be convicting.
  In listening, David realized how his lust had led to adultery, his adultery to deceit, and his deceit to murder. As a result of this confrontation, he repented and said,
  “I have sinned against the L
  ORD
  ”
  (2 Samuel 12:13).
  
• A true-to-life story can cause a change of life.
  Convicting stories can serve to create a hunger to have a pure heart before God. Following David’s moral failure with Bathsheba and Nathan’s subsequent confrontation, he said,
  “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me”
  (Psalm 51:10).
  

We are all created with a conscience by which we gauge whether an attitude or action is
right
or
wrong
. Christians also have the convicting work of the Holy Spirit within their hearts. Feeling guilt is appropriate when we stray from the truth and engage in wrongful acts—this is “true guilt.” If we stay in sin for a long time without responding to appropriate guilt, we can develop a “seared conscience.” At times, however, God appeals to our conscience by sending some individual to confront us.

• An
  admonition
  is a gentle confrontation of warning or counsel for the purpose of correction. To admonish in a gentle, earnest manner means to warn or counsel a person who is in the wrong.
  
  • The Greek word
    noutheteo
    means to “admonish” or literally “to put in mind” (
    nous
    = mind,
    tithemi
    = to put).
    4
    
• An admonition is an earnest, friendly warning given in order to train a person’s mind to think and therefore to act differently.
  

  The apostle Paul said,
  “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God”
  (Colossians 3:16).
  

One day, a woman is caught in the act of adultery. The religious leaders bring her before Jesus, wanting Him to pronounce the death sentence by stoning. Instead of confronting the woman, Jesus confronts the judgmental attitudes of the Scribes and Pharisees by appealing to their conscience.

Jesus cleverly turns the tables on these accusers by highlighting their focus on the letter of the law and their obvious lack of grace. Because they are looking at the letter of the law, Jesus challenges them to first judge themselves in light of the law.

• An admonition can convict a person’s conscience.
  Jesus’ confrontation appeals to their conscience. Jesus makes them look first at their own actions:
  “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first”
  (John 8:7 NKJV). No one moves—eventually being convicted by their own conscience, they all depart one by one, leaving only Jesus and the woman standing alone.
  
• An admonition can encourage a change of life.
  Now, for the first time, Jesus addresses the woman and her wrongful actions.
  

  “When Jesus had raised Himself up and saw no one but the woman, He said to her, ‘Woman, where are those accusers of yours? Has no one condemned you?’ She said, ‘No one, Lord.’ And Jesus said to her, ‘Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more.’”
  (John 8:10–11 NKJV)
  

When you are confronting one caught in sin, examples of some ways to appeal to the conscience are to use comments like these:

• “You can gain and maintain a clear conscience. I want to help you.”
  
• “You can be free of any temptation and not be continually hooked.”
  
• “You can have the blessing of God on your life. I want that for you. Is that what you want?”
  

At times, the most appropriate way to confront is to be direct and explicit, for instance when someone does something flagrantly wrong or when a bad role model corrupts a child’s conscience. Directly exposing someone when they offend does risk alienating them, but at times this method is necessary to turn hearts and to correct a negative situation.

• A
  rebuke
  is a stern, strict reprimand or a convincing, convicting reproof used in order to correct a fault. To rebuke is to confront those in the wrong directly with the aim of
  charging
  or
  challenging
  them to do what is right.
  
  • The Greek word
    epitimao
    is translated “rebuke.”
    5
    During the crucifixion of Christ, one repentant thief rebuked the other thief—he
    challenged
    him to change:
    “The other criminal rebuked him. ‘Don’t you fear God,’ he said, ‘since you are under the same sentence?’”
    (Luke 23:40).
    
• To rebuke can also mean to confront those in the wrong with the aim of
  convincing
  or
  convicting
  them to do right.
  
  • The Greek word
    elegcho
    , which is often translated “rebuke,” also means “to convict, convince or reprove.”
    6
    

    “You have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons: ‘My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you.’”
    (Hebrews 12:5)
    

• A
  double rebuke
  occurred after Jesus told His followers that He must be killed and three days later rise again. Not grasping God’s plan, Peter rebuked Jesus and, in turn, Jesus rebuked Peter.
  

  “Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. ‘Never, Lord!’ he said. ‘This shall never happen to you!’”
  (Matthew 16:22)
  

  There is no more powerful rebuke than the one from Jesus to Peter:
  “When Jesus turned and looked at his disciples, he rebuked Peter. ‘Get behind me, Satan!’ he said. ‘You do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men’”
  (Mark 8:33).
  

• A
  correct rebuke
  requires that the direct confrontation be balanced with great patience and careful instruction in order to bring about change.
  

  “Correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction.”
  (2 Timothy 4:2)
  

The goal of confrontation is not to point a pious finger at someone else’s sin, but to point to the truth that correction is necessary—the kind of truth that sets us free, turns us around, and puts us on a correction course.

Have you ever unknowingly been walking the wrong way? How you wished for someone who cared enough to intervene, to challenge you, to confront you. You needed to be put on a “correction course.”

At times we all need to be confronted with truth, an act that can result in
conviction, correction
, and a
change of direction
. Confrontation, if done wisely and if wisely heeded, is often used by God to correct us from going the wrong way and to cause us to start going the right way.