California Sunshine (20 page)

              I pushed his phone away. "I believe you. Just part of me didn't at the time. It was all just really weird to me. And then yesterday when you said you got off early to take care of somethings all I could think was there was someone else with you."

              "Well, I was actually getting ready to come here. I canceled that flight to give myself time to cool down. I ended up getting shit faced, and going to Mike and Ashley's. They told me to give you another chance this morning after I was sober and calm. I knew they were right, though. I told you I'd never give up on you, just because you have something that's different than anyone else I've ever known. Yeah, you have some stuff that's keeping you from trusting me. I get that, but at some point, you've gotta put that part of your past behind you and realize that I'm not going to do the same thing Lance did. I'm not him, nor will I ever be. I understand he told you he loved you, but hell Alexis told me the same thing. The difference between us and them, we actually fight for what we want. Now if you tell me this is really what you want, I'll leave and I won't bother you anymore, but I don't think this is really what you want is it?"

              I shook my head. "No. After I called you yesterday I lost it. I called Emily, Amelia's mom and told her what I'd done. She told me to call you back and make things right. I tried callin' you I don't know how many times. Maybe you was already drinkin', I don't know. Then I went to a Christmas party last night and had to explain to my boss why I was gettin' shit faced. He told me that distance is hard, he'd gone through somethin' similar when he was in college. Unlike them, though, I don't want proof of somethin' that I know deep down inside never happened. I just wanna say sorry over and over, but I know that ain't gonna change nothin' either. All I can say is give me another chance to prove to you I ain't always this damn crazy. Then I keep thinkin' about the movin' and I worry 'cause I know we both have our careers. I don't wanna give up my life here, and you don't wanna give up your life in California and I don't know how to make that work. I wanna be with you, more than anything else, but am I gonna give up my life, my career that I've worked so hard for? I don't know."

              "Joanna, baby, slow down. We'll get there when we get there, we've been together barely a month now. I ain't askin' you to move. I told you at your pace."

              "But Josh, babe, this is at my pace. I'm sick of the distance, I ain't good at patience. That should be obvious."

              He laughed. "Fair enough. Well, I'm here until the second of January. I took vacation. I want you to show me around, it's only fair."

              I smiled. "Sounds good. I'm still sorry that I was an idiot yesterday."

              He shook his head. "Stop apologizing. It happened, we're gonna work on it. We'll be fine, alright?"

              I nodded. "Okay. How 'bout a tour of my house and my office today?"

              "Sounds good to me."

              After he had his stuff in my room. I grabbed my keys and led him out to my car. "Not gonna lie, kinda weird havin' you here."

              "Why's that?" He asked as he got in on the passenger side.

              I shut my door and shrugged. "I don't know, I guess 'cause our relationship started in California and I've flown out there. I don't know, but I think we're gonna have fun."

              He laughed. "We always have fun together. So you got a big corner office and stuff?"

              I laughed. "After last night, I hope I still have my big corner office. No, seriously it's not huge, but it's nice. I'm lucky to be where I am."

              "Aren't we all?"

              "You've got a point. You can change the music if you want."

              "I want the full Joanna experience."

              I chuckled. "Well I'm not sure you're really ready for all that, but I'll give you part of the experience today. Maybe we'll make it to the full experience by the first. Give ya time to get over the shock."

              "Yeah okay. I don't think anything about you will ever shock me. Put me in a state of awe maybe, but that's about it."

              "We'll see about that," I replied as I parked the car.

              "That was fast."

              "Yeah, ten-minute drive when there ain't much traffic. It ain't always like that, though. Come on." I replied, getting out of the car and waited for him on the sidewalk.

              When we walked in through the doors to the building I spotted Richard, Mark and Allen all walking together, looking deep in conversation.

              "Those are my bosses. Richard's the man in the middle. Navy suit, gray hair. Mark is the one closest to us, black suit, black hair. And the other guy is Allen. Gray suit, brown hair."

              Just then Richard spotted me and turned towards me. "Well if it ain't Ms. Joanna. Whatchya doin' here today?"

              I smiled. "Showin' Josh around."

              Josh and Richard shook hands. "Nice to meet ya. Cut her a break, she was real tore up last night."

              The fire of embarrassment lit my entire body on fire. I could've dug myself a hole and died right there.

              "We've talked about it. I'm not giving up on her sir. I love her too much to do that." Josh said, pulling me closer to his side and looking down at me, a smile on his face.

              My heart soared, as I met his gaze.

              "Good. Every great, long lastin' relationship starts there. Two people who ain't afraid to fight for what they want. Listen it was nice meetin' ya, I gotta get back. She knows how cranky them two can get. Y'all have fun. Merry Christmas!" He exclaimed as he was already halfway across the lobby.

              "He seems nice. Seems like you've got great bosses."

              "I do. That's why I love my job. Most people woulda never given me this opportunity, but for some reason, them three believed in me. So here I am." I said as I opened the door to my office.

              He let out a low whistle. "Damn baby, you're higher on the totem pole than I am."

              I laughed. "Well change it."

              "Nah I kind of like it. I love what I do." He said as he sat down in my chair and turned around.

              I laughed. "You want somethin' to drink?"

              "Nah. I wanna see what you do during the day."

              I smiled. You'll be here 'til the second right? I'll bring you to work with me the twenty-eighth."

              "You can do that?" He asked, opening a drawer.

              I nodded. "I can do whatever I want. Hey the second drawer, grab that box outta there please."

              He looked up at me like he'd been caught. "I didn't mean to go through your stuff."

              I sat down in the chair in front of my desk. "Go through whatever you want. I don't care. I just need that box, you're gonna help me work from home today."

              "Oh am I? What kind of work?" I could hear the undertone to that question.

              I laughed. "Listenin' to demos."

              Just then my door opened and Ryan came walking in.

              "Jo! Richard said you were here today. I wanted to give this to you." He handed me a black envelope and I slowly opened it. Inside there was an invitation.

              "Ryan, this is for tomorrow night. I'm sorry, but I ain't goin'. By the way, this is my boyfriend Joshua. He's in town and we're spendin' time together."

              "Bring him too."

              I sighed. "I'll think about it."

              "Was I interruptin' somethin'?"

              "No."

              Josh was standing now, watching us intently and I knew what he was thinking.

"You know man, you've got a hard ass right here. Ya better keep her, she just signed me."

              I looked at Josh who politely nodded, but there was a fire in his eyes and I knew this whole day had just gone south.

              "Ryan, we're leavin'. I'll let ya know about the party, and next time my door's shut, knock." I said motioning for Josh to come with me.

              We were in the car, riding in silence when the storm broke.

              "So you think I'm cheatin' on you, but tell me, should I be worried?"

              I sighed heavily. "No! I wouldn't even think about doin' nothin' like that. I know I should've talked to ya about how I was feelin', but I didn't. I wouldn't cheat, though."

              "Well, he seemed really comfortable just barging in like that."

              "Yeah and he also thought I'd slept my way to the top, he's a prick. I cain't help that, but I couldn't walk away from signin' him either."

              "I'm sure you could have, but you didn't. Why?"

              I groaned, sitting back in my seat, the car still running as we sat in my driveway. "Because somethin' about his voice hit me. I'll admit it, hell yeah he's good lookin', and he's got a damn good voice. We need him. I don't know what you want me to tell ya. Yeah, the night I saw him I had a drink with him and then went with Catherine, the same night you lost your phone."

              "Oh, so did somethin' happen and you just wanna blame me?"

              "Fuck this Josh. Believe what you want, I didn't cheat. I'm not gonna be Alexis, you're not gonna be Lance. Maybe we shouldn't do this." I said, getting out of the car and slamming the door. I was done with this conversation and I wasn't ready to have another with him anytime soon either.

Chapter 21

              I threw the box of demo CD's on the counter just as Josh came in behind me.

"No, really Jo. Elaborate on that night. What happened?" There was an edge to his voice I'd never heard before and I knew this was our first fight.

              "Nothin'! I went out for drinks like I told you, alone. I saw Catherine there, there were, at least, four bands I'd already heard. Then Ryan took the stage and as soon as he started singin' I knew I had to sign him. After he was done I went over to talk to him. He asked me to have a drink with him so I did. I've gotta schmooze my clients to get 'em sometimes."

              "Yeah, and did you tell him you had a boyfriend?"

              "It never came up. What am I supposed to do? 'Hi I'm Joanna, I work with Tennessee River Records. Here's my card, I've got a boyfriend so don't try it.' Let me guess you do that shit too right. Pretty girl hits on you and it's, 'I'm sorry I got a girlfriend.' Hell no you relish in that shit, so don't preach to me about tellin' someone right off the bat that I gotta boyfriend. You know what you can be a real fuckin' asshole. I'm done with this conversation. I'm done with this. Get your shit and leave."

He stood there, fire in his eyes, mouth open. He knew I'd gotten him, and he knew I was walking away.

              I got in my bedroom, shoved his stuff out into the hallway and slammed the door. And as if she could see what was happening here all the way in California my phone began to ring.

              "Not now Ash."

              "What the hell Jo. Did Josh make it in?"

              "Yeah, and he's on his way out."

              "Y'all didn't fix it?" She asked, sounding nervous.

              "Yeah for about two hours. Then we went to my office and a new artist came in. Who is, by the way, a fuckin' prick, didn't introduce himself, but invited me to a party. By the time I got to introduce Josh he already assumed that Ryan and I had fucked. Started a fight and apparently I'm supposed to introduce myself as Joanna, Tennessee River Records A & R manager and girlfriend to Joshua from California."